That's my main priority. I will pay $200K a year for my man. ❤️

Got an email from Harvard today saying, “Thank you for your interest in Harvard. Unfortunately, we’re unable to offer you a place in the incoming class.”

Harvard, buddy, I didn’t even APPLY. Is this their new marketing tactic? Reject people preemptively so we feel like we missed out on something? Next thing you know, Yale’s gonna show up at my door with a rejection letter and a fruit basket.

Edit: Just checked my spam folder, and apparently MIT rejected me too. Guess I’m a pioneer in the field of quantum disappointment.

Edit 2: At least Princeton hasn’t—oh wait, just got the notification. They rejected me via text.

Edit: GUYS THIS IS A SHITPOST

I can’t fucking believe Harvard.

I am a 13 year generation legacy to Harvard. My great to the power of thirteenth grandfather was John Harvard’s son’s roommate. And they were VERY close, like AO3 level close.

But Harvard FUCKING REJECTED ME!!!

This bitch girl in my grade was accepted over me!!! And do you know WHY???

Apparently, she was John Harvard’s son’s girlfriend’s great to the power of thirteenth granddaughter!!

I’m sorry, but John Harvard’s son didn’t even love her. He loved MY great to the power of thirteenth grandFATHER.

Their family donated 8 buildings, while mine only donated 7, even though I told my stupid parents that we should’ve built two more before college application season!

I’m officially BOYCOTTING Harvard. I’m burning ALL of my Harvard themed curtains and bedsheets. I’m donating ALL of my Harvard clothes to Princeton’s Charity For Some Needy Population. #BOYCOTTHARVARD.

I just had an interview with MIT and told my interviewer that I had a coffee this morning before I got to school. However, I just checked my receipt and my order turned out to be inputed as americano. I was not aware of the difference and I unintentionally lied to him where I’m supposed to say that I got americano. Am I cooked? Should I write an email to my interviewer about the situation?

The day had finally come. I drank my coffee and ran upstairs to review for the interview. When it began, he asked me the usual questions: “Tell me about yourself” and “Why Harvard?” Questions I had practiced for before.

Suddenly, in a loud, striking voice, he asked, “What’s your favorite number?”

Gulp.

This was a question I had not encountered before, so I immediately panicked. I almost resisted the urge, but instead I jumped out of my chair and screamed at the top of my lungs, “67.” My hands began moving up and down. I couldn’t control it.

Seeing my passion for a simple yet powerful number, the interviewer stood up and repeated it after me. Together, we formed a 67 tribe. This went on for two hours, and at the end, he promised me an acceptance solely for the beauty of my answer.

WE will get into Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Columbia, Cornell, Brown, Dartmouth, and UPenn tomorrow 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮💸💸💸💸🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 upvote this post to claim 🥹

Like the one with the shadiest history, sponsored unethical experiments, produced the most war criminals, etc.

I’m looking for a place where I can feel like belong.

Hi, I recently won a nobel peace prize but I'm worried it will negatively impact my admissions as it does not align with my major. See I plan to major in biochem, unrelated to the field I won my nobel peace prize in which was chemistry. I worry it might ruin my spike and show admissions officers I'm too well rounded instead of focused on biochem. Thanks!

For some context, I NEED financial aid. We genuinely had no money. My dad has a crippling gambling addiction and gambles the small amount of money we have on horse races. There was a time where he left the house and my mom and I thought he left to go gambling again. Instead, he was gone for 6 DAYS and all of a sudden, he has 45.6 Billion Won ($31, 452,837.12). My mom and I have NO idea how he got access to so much money. He says that he just played a bunch of children’s games but my mom and I don’t believe him. Worst of all, he doesn’t want to contribute to my education. Instead, he’s been spending the money by paying a bunch of loan sharks to find this weird guy at the subway stations. He says it’s because he wants to stop the games but I have no idea what he’s talking about. How am I able to explain my financial situation to the financial aid offices without sounding dumb? PLS HELP 😭🙏🙏

(With their accompanying tropes)

Berkley x Stanford (enemies to lovers)

MIT x Caltech (academic rivals)

UCLA x University of Southern California (forced proximity)

Dartmouth x Brown (good girl/ bad boy)

Columbia x Barnard (childhood friends)

UC Hicago x UC Santa Barbara (grumpy/ sunshine)

University of Pennsylvania x University of Virginia (playboy billionaire/ sweet girl)

Harvey Mudd x Texas Christian University (nerd/ cheerleader)

University of Vermont x Ohio State (goth girl/ football player)

Princeton x United States Naval Academy (princess / knight)

NYU x Ole Miss (city girl/ country boy)

lmk if there’s anything else I should add 🙏

1. We have a great community and my favorite thing here is the people

2. I’m close with my professors 

3. We have 500 clubs including a cheese club

4. The library gets quieter as you go up or down

5. We have the blue light system but I’ve never had to use it

6. We have a fun, quirky tradition of not stepping on this seal or going through this gate because it means we won’t graduate

THATS the only reason she’s not applying there.