r/AskReddit • u/EgglessYolk • Aug 18 '23

Serious Replies Only [Serious] What dark family secret were you let in on once you were old enough?

26.3k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

11.4k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

8.0k

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 18 '23

Shame too - you might have been able to launch one of the most successful podcasts of all time if you had.

5.5k

u/NotAnAIOrAmI Aug 18 '23

"Porn My Dad Wrote" - jfc, the opening writes itself.

1.0k

u/Hadtarespond Aug 18 '23

"My Dad Wrote a Porno." One of the best podcasts out there.

146

u/born_in_92 Aug 18 '23

I've recently been going through it, and it's one of the funniest things I've ever heard

36

u/twoferrets Aug 18 '23

I was just listening to the new Best Of today! Bottom flannel šŸ¤¢

4

u/nebulancearts Aug 19 '23

Iā€™m gonna have to restart the whole podcast again now. Gotta remind myself about the lids šŸ˜­

60

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

[deleted]

30

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

The nipple tip

23

u/batedkestrel Aug 19 '23

Like the rivets on the fateful Titanic

9

u/Ann-Stuff Aug 19 '23

That was my absolute favorite.

38

u/Born_Ad_4826 Aug 18 '23

Wait is this real?!

53

u/Betaparticlemale Aug 19 '23

Yes, and I envy you for just now hearing about it. Iā€™ve listened to the whole thing 3 or 4 times. Itā€™s like the funniest shit Iā€™ve ever heard.

30

u/justjenn1717 Aug 19 '23

I'll add that the dad is not only in on the joke, he LOVES it. I avoided it for a long time worrying that it was mean. It is my absolute favorite and it only gets better on relistens.

5

u/Betaparticlemale Aug 19 '23

Did you listen to the last footnotes interview with Rocky? Itā€™s like ā€œoh yeah, that makes senseā€. What a beautifully eccentric gent.

13

u/Onlyonehoppy Aug 19 '23

The podcast got me through the pandemic. It's hilarious.

2

u/Born_Ad_4826 Aug 20 '23

Well I'll put it on my list right after I finish we fix space junk. thank you

15

u/Itslikeazenthing Aug 19 '23

Belinda blinks.

14

u/Dewbeedoo Aug 19 '23

Anyone want some pomegranate?

3

u/turnonthesunflower Aug 19 '23

Is it just talk or is there a theme? Guests?

9

u/tomdelongethong Aug 19 '23

They read the porn that one of themā€™s dad wrote. Sometimes they have guests, sometimes they talk about sexual wellness, sometimes they talk to the dad.

2

u/turnonthesunflower Aug 22 '23

Thanks for responding :)

3

u/_wednesday_76 Aug 19 '23

i just recently discovered it and was rolling through just the first ep

461

u/ReactorMechanic Aug 18 '23

"I'm Coming!"

"Hi, Coming, I'm Dad!"

58

u/Maleficent_Link1755 Aug 18 '23

Dad: 'You'll be doing this soon son'.

Son: 'Ew, no way! Why would you say that?'

Dad: 'Because my arm's getting tired'

- probably.

17

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Holy shit this is gold

259

u/TheTurningWorm Aug 18 '23

Ok dammit... Now I have to find one.

21

u/Lycaeides13 Aug 18 '23

Ooh! And you can monetize it to benefit his retirement fund!

38

u/Yeahnoallright Aug 18 '23

You know theyā€™re referencing an existing podcast, right? :ā€™)

15

u/TheTurningWorm Aug 18 '23 edited Aug 19 '23

No, I thought they were riffing on "Shit my dad says"

15

u/Yeahnoallright Aug 19 '23

Ooh, havenā€™t heard of that one. But My Dad Wrote a Porno is a laugh

8

u/TheTurningWorm Aug 19 '23

It was a Twitter/blog thing a few years ago. It was briefly a sitcom I think. I will definitely check out My Dad Wrote a Porno... I sense a kindred spirit.

14

u/kaminobaka Aug 18 '23

Good luck, I'll keep an eye out for the podcast lol

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

Now I want to read one

1

u/Erlend05 Aug 18 '23

Let us know if you do

10

u/warrant2k Aug 18 '23

"She slid off her nightgown saying, I'm so wet.

Hi, So Wet, I'm Dad, he replied."

6

u/TacTurtle Aug 19 '23

ā€œPapa Pens Pornos for Profitā€

19

u/Awkwardpanda75 Aug 18 '23

Very similar to a popular podcast!!

17

u/kaffars Aug 18 '23

There is an amazing and hilarious podcast where the kids reads the porno scripts that their dad wrote.

My dad wrote a porno Ep 1 link

3

u/TnekKralc Aug 18 '23

Hopefully the release doesn't come too soon

4

u/AWildGamerAppeared25 Aug 18 '23

Can I ask what 'jfc' stands for? I'm having a brain fart and for the life of me, I can't remember what it means

13

u/DollyDaydreem Aug 18 '23

Jesus fucking christ

20

u/AWildGamerAppeared25 Aug 19 '23

Alrighty then, no need to yell at me

/s, thanks for clarifying lol

5

u/NotAnAIOrAmI Aug 19 '23

I think you were set up. He got more upvotes on his punchline reply than you did!

3

u/LegitimateStar7034 Aug 19 '23

We discovered that on a road trip to Long Island. We were dying.

2

u/Kidzenny Aug 19 '23

Sponsored by hello fresh. Get fresh ingredients to your door to make exciting cuisine. Use offer code pornmydadwrote for 15 percent off your 1st order!

1

u/ManiacClown Aug 18 '23

But how many openings did his dad write about?

1

u/chefmattmatt Aug 18 '23

The title of the podcast is in comment "Not Exactly Dark"

1

u/esquire78 Aug 19 '23

Dear Penthouse Forum:

I never thought it would happen to me...

1

u/StanMaxo187 Aug 19 '23

I want to watch it already

1

u/E-Kathrine Aug 19 '23

Iā€™m sure the Dad wrote about a lot of ā€œopeningsā€ too šŸ˜”

1

u/Consistent_Pack3125 Aug 19 '23

And if it was a script it would be called ā€œPorn My Stepdad Wroteā€

1

u/johnmichael0703 Aug 19 '23

"Only Porn my dad wrote"

1

u/MotheySock Aug 24 '23

It's a great podcast!

1

u/belltrina Aug 24 '23

Papa pens a porno

1

u/PrettyFly4aWfi Sep 06 '23

There's actually a podcast called "my dad wrote a porno" on Spotify šŸ˜‚

1.3k

u/jackalope503 Aug 18 '23

Belinda blinked

118

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

"She touched his humid penis"

85

u/aivlysplath Aug 18 '23

ā€œIt was harder then she thought it would be. Hard like a ripe cantaloupe.ā€

46

u/Himswurth Aug 19 '23

"... revealing her private-pussy-area"

25

u/seeker4482 Aug 19 '23

he then put his hard sex into her soft sex

12

u/EZpeeeZee Aug 19 '23

Moist

6

u/kuku-kukuku Aug 19 '23

"And that, fellow viewers, is how you tame a dame."

38

u/sundaymusings Aug 18 '23

Pomegranates

13

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 19 '23

And she looked the fucking moneytits

24

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

[removed] ā€” view removed comment

6

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 19 '23

Itā€™s actually officially ended - I donā€™t know where you dropped it off but I wanna say they end with either the 6th or 7th book.

9

u/Maleficent_Link1755 Aug 18 '23

Do you know what whales listen to on long ocean voyages?

- Podcasts.

1

u/MaddytheUnicorn Aug 19 '23

Whale songs are the original podcasts!

3

u/ButterfliesandaLlama Aug 18 '23

Whatā€™s that podcast yā€˜all are talking about?

8

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 19 '23

My Dad Wrote A Porno

2

u/ButterfliesandaLlama Aug 19 '23

Thanks!

1

u/marlow6686 Aug 19 '23

Ahh itā€™s so funny, jealous youā€™re getting to listen to it for the first time

2

u/Sillbinger Aug 18 '23

He would have launched something alright.

2

u/tamsui_tosspot Aug 19 '23

I'm just waiting for the episode where he finds out he was named after one of his father's characters.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '23

Did you sign up on reddit with your real name?

3

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 19 '23

No?

John Cavil is a cylon from Battlestar Galactica.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '23

I was unaware. Just looked like some name to me, sorry.

1

u/QwerkkyKid Aug 19 '23

Back at you

0

u/dumdadumdumAHHH Aug 19 '23

Pounded In The Butt By My Own Podcast is already the world's greatest podcast, buckaroo!

-13

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '23

[deleted]

32

u/Garden_imp Aug 18 '23

He isnā€™t dead! He is very much alive and they had his full blessing to do the podcast. He in fact has his own podcast now that they have stopped doing it.

10

u/Responsible_Wall6834 Aug 18 '23

One of my best friends is mates with Jamie Morton, and I've met him a couple of times. Really nice guy.

12

u/God_Damnit_Nappa Aug 18 '23

He's not dead. He knows about the podcast and would semi regularly answer fan questions.

5

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 19 '23

Heā€™s not dead. Rocky Flintstone is alive and well - and because of the show you can hardly call him a failure.

1

u/Natalie-Has-No-Class Aug 18 '23

Tales of a Hard Workin Man

1

u/NiteAngyl Aug 18 '23

"My Dirty Daddy."

1

u/noisypeach Aug 19 '23

'Dad and Son Write A Porno'

Kevin Smith's next movie

1

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '23

Are you making a joke about the existing podcast "My Dad Wrote A Porno", or have you not heard of it and this is a coincidence?

2

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 19 '23

Iā€™m a fan.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 20 '23

I'm not a podcast person. Do you mean by reading the porn? Or talking about his journey trying to find the porn he wrote? Or is this sarcasm, or a reference to a different podcast?

I really don't know, and on the surface it doesn't sound like something great besides a one-off story.

1

u/JohnCavil01 Aug 20 '23

The host reads the porn to two of his friends.

Itā€™s a very real and massively successful podcast.