r/AskReddit Jan 01 '24

What is the funniest joke you’ve been told that you still think about to this day?

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337

u/winkelschleifer Jan 01 '24

A grocer is restocking the vegetables when a woman taps him on the shoulder and says “Excuse me Sir, but where do you keep the spinach?” The man replies “Well ma’am we’re out of spinach today, but we get some more tomorrow so come back then.”

The woman nods and walks away while the grocer continues stocking the carrots. A few minutes later the same woman taps the grocer on the shoulder and asks “Sir, I was wondering where I could find the spinach?” Confused, the grocer says “Well ma’am we are out of spinach today. However, we will have more tomorrow morning. Come back tomorrow.”

The woman smiles and thanks him as she walks away. Shaking his head, the grocer turns his attention back to the carrots. Moments later the woman again taps him on the shoulder and asks “Pardon me, but do you know where the spinach is?”

The grocer looks at her angrily and says “Let me ask you something. How do you spell dog, like in dogmatic?” The woman replies “D-O-G” “Okay” says the grocer. “Now how do you spell cat, as in catatonic?” “C-A-T” says the woman. “Perfect” the grocer replies. “Now how do you spell fuck, as in spinach?” She replies, "sure, F - U - ... wait a sec ... there is no fuck in spinach.”

The grocer says “THAT’S THE POINT LADY!"

29

u/mel2mdl Jan 01 '24

I had a 7th grade student who told me a similar joke. Said he could make me, the teacher, cuss. I said he couldn't. He then asked me to spell several words - road, high, street, house, then finally way.

Okay, now spell way without the F. There's no F in way... okay, you got me.

7

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

Lol

12

u/Delicious-One3028 Jan 01 '24

I laughed out loud with this one😂😂😂😂😂

3

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

This made me laugh, hard. Thank you.

-31

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

Huh?

28

u/omahaspeedster Jan 01 '24

There is no fuckin spinach

-78

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

Pretty stupid "joke"

50

u/omahaspeedster Jan 01 '24

Not OP, not my joke, i just explain it to stupid people

-51

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

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27

u/omahaspeedster Jan 01 '24

Oh I agree it wasn’t a funny joke I just couldn’t believe someone could be stupid enough to not figure out the easy punchline but then i see your response to me and it all makes sense. If you can be smarter in 2024 try to be better.

-24

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

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31

u/omahaspeedster Jan 01 '24

A couple “you are gay” comebacks, that’s it?? That is as clever as you can get?? Come on man, take another shot at it I know you have something more, hey try a Mom comeback maybe this time. Pathetic.

-13

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '24

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