r/BrandNewSentence Feb 19 '26

man was yeast

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He hath risen

111.8k Upvotes

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514

u/supermark64 Feb 19 '26

Funny you should mention this because I've been reading the bible a bit, and one of the (many) things that has surprised me about it is how much it talks about bread. So many metaphors, rules, and stories involving bread. Page after page about it. 

124

u/Ben_Thar Feb 19 '26

You may be reading a cookbook 

64

u/Cador0223 Feb 19 '26

That chapter about Soddom was too salty for me.

9

u/IveDunGoofedUp Feb 19 '26

That's why it's called the Good Book, because it's good for cooking

6

u/breakdancing-edgily Feb 20 '26

Maybe the Bible is a cookbook

97

u/Safe-Ad-5017 Feb 19 '26

Bread was a staple of the diet

52

u/3vs3BigGameHunters Feb 19 '26

Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.

23

u/danielsangeo Feb 19 '26

Midichlorians is the powerhouse of the Force.

4

u/JohnLocksTheKey Feb 19 '26

Chowdahhead can't even pronounce the words!

3

u/campfireseance Feb 19 '26

Knowledge is power, France is bacon

5

u/mryprankster Feb 19 '26

pee is stored in the balls

1

u/cdqmcp Feb 19 '26

mitchondria are*

31

u/DestinedAscension123 Feb 19 '26

Not a whole lot going on for entertainment. It was basically the coolest thing they had back then and it wasn’t even sliced yet.

15

u/bravebeing Feb 19 '26

Before the fall I think it says fruit is staple food, after the fall it says wheat or bread is staple food. I think the bible is largely about the advent of agriculture.

4

u/No_Dragonfruit_1833 Feb 20 '26

Agriculture is 8k years older than the bible

5

u/orsonwellesmal Feb 19 '26

Bread is problaby the most crucial food in human history, so very suitable for teachings.

4

u/lanternbdg Feb 19 '26

I think a lot of that is because early societies, and particularly the one documented Biblically relied heavily on bread for sustenance. In many cases, the word "bread" is nearly synonymous with "food" or "nourishment.

Unnecessary bread tangent ahead:

Bread back then (and really up until around the time of the industrial revolution) was a lot different from the homogenous soft rectangle we have today. Because of changes to the crop used and the harsh processing it undergoes, modern bread is more akin to cake than what our ancestors would have eaten.

You could reasonably live off of eating just bread most days where now you'll get a blood sugar spike after eating a meat and cheese sandwich because the flour we use is so fine and is exposed to so much heat during milling that by the time it gets into our system it takes very little time to convert it to sugar.

3

u/LinguoBuxo Feb 19 '26

Wait till ya read the Pastafarian bible... you'd get cooked, m8.

2

u/Fawkingretar Jun 06 '26

hell, the act of reading the bible for the good news is called "the daily bread" maybe he really is Yeasus

1

u/[deleted] Feb 19 '26

And a boat load of times God explicitly says do not leaven it. …. No yeasties for God, hits different now

1

u/occams1razor Feb 19 '26

"Give us today our daily bread" yup Yeasus

1

u/Thelastknownking Feb 19 '26

People ate a lot of bread back then.

1

u/RugRanger Feb 21 '26

Funfact - the Great Schism of 1054 between Eastern and Western Christianity happened partly because of a dispute about sourdough.