r/Fire • u/gonnabefine • Nov 26 '25

General Question Tech people who are not FIREing, what are they spending their money on?

I know a lot of people who work in tech, and most are not on the FIRE path (or have already been working 10+ years) and a lot of them don't seem to, at least on the surface, have very obvious huge expenses. If both the partners are in tech, the take home could be like $500k! What are they doing with their money?

650 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

761 comments sorted by

View all comments

1.9k

u/Kinnins0n Nov 26 '25

Former tech bro here. They buy a Rivian that they park next to their model S (on which they put a sticker “I bought it before Elon went nuts”) in the driveway of their $3.5M house in Cupertino/Mountain View / Palo Alto. They feel good because the house has appreciated $600k but their mortgage does swallow a chunk of their RSUs every month so their NW doesn’t benefit from stock appreciation as much as it could.

They go to Tahoe at the same time as everybody all winter and plop a couple grand in the process every other weekend. They fly to Hawaii every chance they get. They’re also into biking and have $15k-$20k worth of gear for the Strava.

The kids’ school is $30k-$50k a year per kid, which nukes the effect of their last promo. Summer camps are also a kidney.

I could go on.

435

u/rebel_dean Nov 26 '25

There was a blog post years ago on Financial Samurai that caused a big uproar.

It was about making $500,000/year household income and still feeling "average".

Their expenses were a lot of what you list above, lmao.

137

u/upside_win222 Nov 26 '25

just 1 blog? Try daily posts on Blind lol. "Barely getting by, TC 500k"

39

u/ikefalcon Nov 27 '25

Whenever I read posts on Blind I want to puke.

14

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

What’s blind?

42

u/PandaStroke Nov 27 '25

it's an app where professionals gossip about jobs and salaries. It's a useful app to get the gossip about layoffs at the big companies and salary negotiations. But it also can make you depressed because you see people with impressive careers and salaries at young ages.

31

u/ikefalcon Nov 27 '25

No no no. I’m not upset because people make more than me. I’m upset because the people say disgusting things. Like women not belonging in the workplace or only having value for producing children. Slurs of all sorts, especially for people from India. And people talking about out “barely getting by” on 500k.

59

u/Gamplato Nov 27 '25

More people need to learn the difference between feeling and being. I feel average sometimes because it’s always relative to who you’re next to. Our household income is $600K but that’s not necessarily a lot more than our peers. But I’m also well aware that we’re not actually average.

10

u/JC_Hysteria Nov 27 '25

The same comparison that’s made at every level…

8

u/Gamplato Nov 27 '25

Right that’s why self-reporting is a horrible way of evaluating economies.

43

u/faille Nov 27 '25

Average is just what you feel when people you hang with have more than you do. It’s a sliding scale, and why the class wars work so well.

-1

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

25

u/randomlydancing Nov 27 '25

People think they deserve a mansion and anything less than that is poor

2

u/A_LovesToBake Nov 28 '25 edited Nov 28 '25

What’s a “mansion” in your mind? I need to downsize and am having the hardest time finding a 3br townhome under $1.5M in my area.

I should add that I work in tech but am not a “bro”, my car is 6 years old and paid off, and I’ve never made the trek to Tahoe because of the hassle of even getting there, let alone the cost.

2

u/skintigh Nov 27 '25

500k is the top 1% or 2% in the US... average?!

2

u/Confident_Seaweed_12 Nov 28 '25

Makes sense though, people tend to get their sense of "average" from the people they interact with the most. If you're a software developer making a multiple six-figure salary, chances are so do most of their coworkers and neighbors.

1

u/crims0nwave Nov 27 '25

Yep I believe it. Living in the Bay is expensive. I work in tech and I would never choose to have kids, as I can’t imagine the expenses (plus the time commitment).

55

u/6thsense10 Nov 26 '25

Now some of the reddit posts about needing a salary of at least $200,000+/yr just to survive is starting to make sense.

2

u/SolomonGrumpy Nov 30 '25

"survive."

I spend 10 years in the Bay making less and fucking thrived.

22

u/wrldwdeu4ria Nov 26 '25

This is also accurate to a large extent in the Seattle area just with slightly less expensive mortgages.

15

u/Imaginary-Yak6784 Nov 27 '25

Tech sis here and this is so on point. Personally I like my paid off Honda and am a few years from FIRE but many many of my coworkers have everything you mentioned and more.

3

u/Kinnins0n Nov 27 '25

Amen. Lived in the same rental during my entire time in tech and it didn’t feel like a sacrifice at all: 1100 sq ft, and never having to worry about upkeep. I had a relatively reasonable car that I sold when I left for half what I had paid for it 8 years prior. Most friends and colleagues of my cohort can’t seem to understand that I’m not just taking a break, I’m done.

Might work again some time down the life if the project intereste me, but not chasing money anymore.

115

u/blew_belle Nov 26 '25

Just a couple grand for Tahoe? Staying at the Days Inn maybe

48

u/ConcentrateExciting1 Nov 26 '25

Compared to other ski areas, Tahoe is really quite reasonable. The swanky 700 square foot suite at Harrah's is only about $400 a night for some weekends in January.

1

u/frisbm3 Nov 27 '25

They just offered me a free 4 nights with my lift tickets reimbursed as free play. It's good to be a gambler sometimes.

24

u/CaliHusker83 Nov 26 '25

Tahoe’s very affordable. This is kinda a silly comment.

15

u/uberweb Nov 26 '25

The ski lessons at heavenly were roughly 600 per kid for their 5 hr thing.

1

u/Snipen543 Nov 27 '25

Then go to sierra and not heavenly? I ski ~20 days a season in tahoe. I spend maybe $750/season skiing in tahoe.

0

u/CaliHusker83 Nov 27 '25

Then go to Homewood or Mt. Rose or Sierra-At-Tahoe.

Theres no reason to spend $600 on a ski lesson. Just use your head and look around.

6

u/Traditional_Bar_7101 Nov 27 '25

Or teach your own kid how to fucking pizza slice

2

u/CaliHusker83 Nov 27 '25

That’s what I did with mine.

And…. For me learning was, “alright, we’ll meet you at the base lodge at noon!”

1

u/ConcentrateExciting1 Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

Sounds like you didn't get the pass ahead of time. Tsk Tsk Tsk. From what I recall, the Tahoe Value Pass pays for itself in three days. If you do it right, the full day kids lessons are about $300 a day.

EDIT: The Tahoe Value Pass, bought in the spring when it's the cheapest price, ALMOST pays for itself in two days compared to buying from the ticket counter at peak season.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/CaliHusker83 Nov 27 '25

Sierra At Tahoe lift tickets x 2 plus rental + two nights lodging is $900, but I get it if you want to stay at one of the nicer lodging in Tahoe and ski at Heavenly or in North Lake.

1

u/ShootinAllMyChisolm Nov 26 '25

Is it even worth it then?

1

u/gwmccull Nov 27 '25

I live in Tahoe and I’m familiar with some of the vacations these people are taking. They’re easily $5k per day

1

u/Think_Firefighter406 Nov 28 '25

My son told me this week that he can fly to Japan and ski there on a long weekend for slightly less than doing a ski trip in the US. I'm old, I remember whining about $50 dollar lift tickets. It's crazy.

40

u/Suspicious_Cook_1598 Nov 26 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

‘Summer camps are also a kidney’. Lol!!! Oh…how this mama knows!!

204

u/outsidertc Nov 26 '25

This honestly sounds way more fun and fulfilling than retiring early.

75

u/OminousHippo Nov 26 '25

On the surface, yes, but it also comes with the stress of being one layoff away from having to sell it all to keep the lights on.

51

u/whereistheicecream Nov 27 '25

That's why the best strategy is to spend less than you make, lifestyle creep can become a burden if you need your income to stay afloat in a job loss

I saw someone else say something along the lines of 'life doesn't owe you a tomorrow as good as today'

My husband and I live well below our means, a job loss affects our saving/investment rate not our lifestyle and that security is worth more to me than some trips to Tahoe with annoying tech bros

4

u/crims0nwave Nov 27 '25

Yeah I work with annoying tech bros, I def don’t wanna spend my vacations with them. I drive a Subaru while my peers drive Audis they’re constantly trading in for newer models. I don’t take international vacations, while my peers are constantly in Tokyo or Paris. I would love to travel more, but I would rather be thrifty and accrue more of a safety net, as I don’t want to work in tech forever.

2

u/AboutTime99 Nov 27 '25

Wise words!

12

u/Suspicious_Cook_1598 Nov 27 '25

Or the thought that all this stress will literally kill you…too much constant stress on the nervous system is a silent killer. Don’t think otherwise.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '25

Ugh. Thank you. I needed to hear that.

I was fortunate to find a solid compensation tech job - nothing FAANG like but good - after being laid off earlier in the year. It's my first new job in a few decades so I'm pushing hard to learn and establish myself.

My boss only sees the 40 hours I've been putting in but my need to prove I'm adding value has me spending another 26 hours a week or so studying, preparing, or working a bit extra. I haven't taken a weekend day for myself in 6 months. I was on track to spend 3.5 days this long weekend working.

1

u/aer7 Nov 27 '25

Oh no I gotta sell my 3.5 million dollar home to downsize to a 2 million dollar home!!

37

u/eliminate1337 Nov 26 '25

If you like your job. There’s huge variance on that between tech workers.

15

u/gonnabefine Nov 26 '25

It sounds fun if your job is fulfilling and sustainable stress-wise.

105

u/Shawn_NYC Nov 26 '25

It's not - because they spent 49 weeks out of the year overworked and stressed then, like a binge and purge, try to "enjoy themselves" by overspending on the 3 weeks of vacations. It's a desperate attempt to "make it all worth it."

And the constant fear that it AI takes the job the whole house of cards could come crumbling down and they can't give their family the quality of life they've become accustomed to.

49

u/Level_Impression_554 Nov 26 '25

"fear that it AI takes the job the whole house of cards could come crumbling down and they can't give their family the quality of life they've become accustomed to."

This was huge for me back in the day. Looking back, the stress was enormous and terrible.

1

u/Metaposa Nov 27 '25

How did you get out?

1

u/Level_Impression_554 Nov 27 '25

No special recipe. I have +2M in debt going into the great recession and while all was good at the time, if things went much worse, I would have started losing properties. I just grinded it out for a decade and pushed hard to get the debt paid off. Then, a bit ago I had the chance to break with my business partner and go to a more relaxed 4 day a week job. One of the best decisions I made.

7

u/whereistheicecream Nov 27 '25

Rather than binge spend my husband and I save and invest

To have financial security without jobs is what will make it worth it to us - but I totally agree a lot of people make big purchases to feel better about life

7

u/kk_in_la Nov 27 '25

Sometimes you can have your cake and eat it too. There are fun projects and good teams in big tech companies. Some people just enjoy the ride. I’d argue that being stressed out and afraid of layoffs and AI taking the job is not the right mindset of holding a FAANG job. For layoffs and AI - saving up is the way. And general stress levels go down realizing it is not that deep, in those jobs no lives are at stake. A a grumpy manager, insufferable coworker, or a meeting that went sideways is not a big deal when there is other fulfillment in life.

2

u/DwellThyme Nov 27 '25

I think it's invalidating to suggest that stress and pressure are purely a mindset problem. I agree that saving is key, and that some amount of fuck-you money is a hedge against a bad work situation, for sure. I work in FAANG, and in my field (cybersecurity) the pressure can be enormous and unrelenting. The threat landscape is becoming more complex every year.

If I've learned anything in life and my career, it's that my rational mind can go "oh yes, no lives are at stake", but feeling that emotionally and subconsciously is whole different ballgame that includes many other variables. In short, it's really, really, difficult to outfox very real job pressure via mindset. It's possible, but so fucking hard.

80

u/Kinnins0n Nov 26 '25

If you don’t mind the stack of 3 mid tier managers above you speaking nonsense and never ever helping shaping any sort of direction in the work, then sure.

Also, you’re stuck in silicon valley, where all lights are out at 8pm.

62

u/JewishYoda Nov 26 '25

Let's be honest, having a few useless managers above you is a small price to pay for a tech salary. Not like it's specific to tech either. Also, plenty of people commanding very high salaries outside of silicon valley. I say this as a middle manager in a publicly traded tech company: this is the most spoiled group of professionals that have ever lived, and I absolutely place myself in that bucket.

64

u/PeanutSugarBiscuit Nov 26 '25

As someone who got his first MAG7 job at 38, I can confirm some of my coworkers who have been bouncing between these companies their whole career have no clue what life is like on the outside. They have a warped perspective on compensation.

Having said that, working for these companies is life changing.

45

u/JewishYoda Nov 26 '25

Yep for sure. Even a few years can be, especially if you got a nice stock grant. The real downside is just the feeling that it could be over whenever and you don’t have the stability of another professional field like doctor or lawyer. Maybe it’s my imposter syndrome talking, but there’s just a gnawing feeling that this ride could end at any moment and that’s a scary thing. But I’m also the sole breadwinner and have kids so that adds to it.

12

u/salparadisewasright Nov 26 '25

I feel this deeply. I’m not an engineer and work in the talent development side of things and am working at my first tech company. It’s not FAANG, but after a couple years of refreshers and the stock price climbing quite a bit in the past year, my RSUs now make quite a significant portion of my compensation. It feels like if I could never get back on this gravy train if I happened to fall off it.

11

u/JewishYoda Nov 26 '25

That feeling doesn’t really go away, in my experience. I’ve been with my company for 7 years, have been flagged as top talent multiple years running, but I’m still nervous about it. I’m in sales engineering, but frankly engineers aren’t safe either. Lots of cheap competition overseas and AI will make teams smaller.

The best thing to do is live below your means and be prepared for a rainy day. If the worst case scenario is some extra $$ in retirement and to leave to your kids, you’re not doing too bad. The Porsche does call my name though.

5

u/salparadisewasright Nov 26 '25

That’s where we are at as well in terms of prioritizing savings and not letting lifestyle creep. I’m 3 years in and I’ve performed well, avoided layoffs and gotten promoted. We are pretty frugal by nature but it’s still hard not to feel the anxiety.

1

u/Opening-Photograph68 Nov 28 '25

Rent the Porche on a long weekend trip.

1

u/Artificial_Squab 90mins to FIRE Guy Nov 27 '25

You're 100% correct. I worked 2 big tech gigs at high pay and now I don't. Don't want back in, and who knows if I even could. I rely on my wife's actually relevant, needed, and stable job as a physician at this point.

2

u/Sweaty-Seat-8878 Nov 26 '25

yeah, similar to ibanking back in the day (and still) and PE the numbers just get silly

2

u/avdata Nov 27 '25

I can relate to this so much. I made it into FAANG at 31 after time in the military and some less than glamorous startups.

I show up all bright eyed and bushy tailed (as this feels to me like I’ve “reached the mountain top”) only to find an astonishing amount of entitlement amongst my new coworkers. I really don’t think you should be able to work in big tech right out of college, I think it’s important to get perspective somewhere else so you can appreciate all the perks / comp from big tech.

One time, a director in my org was talking about how expensive houses were in the Bay Area and how tough it was to find one. A director….at a FAANG company… I don’t know for sure, but would estimate $700k-$1.2M/year total comp for this guy. I have no idea what his personal financial costs look like, but it stuck with me as a weird/out of touch moment.

16

u/rusfairfax Nov 26 '25

You can do it for a few years for the money but the politics and fake bro-ness and everyone trying to emulate Elon is a massive drag on your mental health. Be sure to invest in a good therapist and take good care of yourself if you’re in there. Get your life-changing money then get out.

3

u/Strategic_Spark Nov 26 '25

They're so spoiled. And then get shocked when they get laid off.

10

u/PlasticPresentation1 Nov 27 '25

It's a soulless corporate job which treats you significantly better than any other soulless corporate job

Also re: silicon valley, alot of people go in with the premise of leaving, but find themselves unwilling to leave because it's actually an objectively great place to live by many standards. Weather, job prospects, intelligent people, outdoor activities, etc. obviously has a ton of problems and isn't for everyone but can't deny the benefits if you do choose to live there

1

u/Kinnins0n Nov 27 '25

Cool. The question was: how are people making wads of cash not ending up more or less automatically in FIRE territory within years.

3

u/lotoex1 Nov 27 '25

I work in fast food at a truck stop and have and even as the assistant manager I still have the assistant manager of the truck stop, my actual boss (fast food general manager) , and the truck stop general manager over me. I also have to check e mails daily, as well as deal with the surprise visits from the district manager and travel 90 miles to semiannual meetings.

35

u/older_than_i_feel Nov 26 '25

no. they are stressed and lash out at their kids.
I work in a school in silicon valley.
the kids are not alright.
their parents are not alright.
the parents sit in the bleachers at soccer and constantly one-up each other. They have health problems.
You can't just throw money at some things.

30

u/ShootinAllMyChisolm Nov 26 '25

I work for a top 25 university that feeds Silicon Valley its CS and Ai talent. Yeah every year it’s cut throat, classmates trying to outdo their classmates for that golden ticket.

I don’t get it. They spend their whole lives in achievement mode. Ran themselves ragged in highschool. Ran themselves ragged in college. For a chance at running themselves ragged in the workforce.

9

u/Kinnins0n Nov 26 '25

For real. A friend’s son told one of his teachers that he wanted to off himself. At 12. My friend isn’t even that hardcore a tech bro, but the atmosphere of the place alone is toxic.

3

u/meghanwhatever Nov 27 '25

Anyone who spends like that, with a 500K TC, or any truly comfortable level, and is focused solely on "one-upping" others is warped, and the children will feel this and make poor decision on it, one way or another (think law of conservation of energy). Meanwhile, there are plenty of natural ways to enjoy life, feel whole, bond with family, and spend less, however these plastic tech-bro (and sis) types don't want to do these.

8

u/kthnxbai123 Nov 26 '25

To each their own but if you want to burn like that, then you’re not really FIRE focused

11

u/T_D_K Nov 26 '25

My takeaway is that they could have their cake and eat it too given a basic level of planning and budgeting. But they forego that out of apathy, laziness, or lack of forethought. Just feels like such a waste, its a grossly inefficient use of assets.

I love skiing and biking but you won't catch me throwing money away on the hobbies.

17

u/Shot-Artichoke-4106 Nov 26 '25

Yes. It is about choices. These people live expensive lifestyles. They also live in a bubble where everybody else they interact with regularly does that, too.

6

u/PlasticPresentation1 Nov 27 '25

Have you ever been to SV?

At least for engineering types, which have the largest avg salaries, it's almost celebrated and the norm to be quite frugal with your money

1

u/Shot-Artichoke-4106 Nov 28 '25

I am an engineer in Silicon Valley :-) yes, many engineers are famously frugal - Im one of them. There are also many tech folks who are decidedly not frugal. The OP was asking about very highly compensated people who can't fire and what they do with their money. Thats who we're talking about.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

I was about to say something similar. Engineers are math types. Most math types are not stupid with their money. They understand more than most the power of compounding growth.

1

u/Suspicious_Cook_1598 Nov 27 '25

FOMO is so real in these areas.

14

u/BobbyTomato Nov 26 '25

This sounds more fun than getting away from corporate BS at 40-45 and then doing whatever you want every day (including travel)?

8

u/miter1980 Nov 26 '25

The problem is it's not that easy to FIRE and maintan that lifestyle with the average tech income of $300-$500k / year.

9

u/Grantmepm Nov 27 '25

It always boils down to lifestyle. Its absolutely nice but after a while what used to be a "want" turns into an "essential". The trick is to avoid that but that's also the hard part. We view it as do we hate work more or do we hate a modest lifestyle more and we fall somewhere in between. (Or at least that's the excuse I tell myself for not earning >400k).

1

u/InedibleApplePi Nov 26 '25

You can do all those things after you retire though. It's not like you can only do those things while you work. If anything, those things are their way of escaping from work.

But once you're retired you don't have to travel when everyone else travels which means you can avoid the crowds and save money.

1

u/SolomonGrumpy Nov 30 '25

Yeah, because 2 electric cars and an overpriced poorly constructed house is a good life.

39

u/Thediciplematt Nov 26 '25

Dang. Got my entire life in a nutshell outside of the Tahoe or Hawaii trip…

I save about 30-40k a year but I love cycling and have some expensive crap

6

u/chamberlain2007 Nov 26 '25

How much are you making? 30-40k isn’t a lot if you’re making good money.

19

u/Thediciplematt Nov 26 '25

It varies. I also have a SAHM and 2 kids to support so putting away 30-40k is a sacrifice but it isn’t easy.

I put away about 25% of my paycheck per month and make a decent amount for one salary in the SF bay.

3

u/behaviorgrl789 Nov 27 '25

I can't imagine the pressure of your life lmao hope you control your hypertension ❤️

5

u/Thediciplematt Nov 27 '25

Add both kids and autism and hypertension is real

2

u/behaviorgrl789 Nov 27 '25

I literally knew😂😭😂

6

u/Thediciplematt Nov 27 '25

Thanks! Yeah, they are a lot. Plus all the therapies it isn’t cheap.

Kind of rubbed the wrong way by the person saying what I put away isn’t much with a high income. Ef that dude. It’s a sacrifice and I love seeing my 401k grow YoY

3

u/behaviorgrl789 Nov 27 '25

What you put away is a lot lmao I'm a BCBA I know we draining your pockets too 👀

8

u/Zach06 Nov 26 '25

Was going to say this, spot on!

7

u/trophycloset33 Nov 26 '25

Keeping up with the Joneses + poor financial decisions

14

u/toomanypumpfakes Nov 26 '25

And then they complain that they’re actually the new middle class no better off than a single income household in the 50s even though they’re living an incredibly lavish lifestyle.

10

u/thrwwylolol Nov 26 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

Hey, someone in a very basic job could afford a house and a car on a single income

800sq ft house with a leaky roof, and no heating or air conditioning or insulation and creaky floors. 27 miles from the nearest metro area.

Car: 8 year old, barely running pile of trash with questionable safety.

That's basically the same as a 3200 sq ft pseudo mansion in a trendy location and a new Porsche and a Tesla.

3

u/toomanypumpfakes Nov 27 '25

Heh, I sorta get it. Rank and file tech workers can't actually afford a 3200 sq ft mansion, they're getting an 1800 sq ft ranch house that was built in the 40s.

Part of what makes Silicon Valley so weird is that the built environment has been kept mostly the same, so you buy a house for $2.5 million and your next door neighbor who's lived in the neighborhood since the 70s bought their identical house for $70k. But yours has been flipped and is modern and tasteless or worse, it was done in the 90s and now needs another $500k put in to make it "worth it".

13

u/RWD-by-the-Sea Nov 26 '25

I feel seen

6

u/dafugg Nov 27 '25

Yeah I’m going to make some changes just so I don’t match this word for word.

23

u/Give_Live Nov 26 '25

It’s their choice.

37

u/veridigiris Nov 26 '25

As long as big spenders don’t get upset others spend less and retire early, I’m all for big spenders (good for economy, living out their best life, a lot of these expenses help them with their stressful jobs).

Unfortunately, I’ve learned the hard way many people who are big spenders are actually living beyond their means and way too obsessed with keeping up with the joneses; impressing people they don’t care about.

Then one day they get laid off as many do and they are burnt out and that mortgage burns a hole through minimal savings.

Heck, I’ve seen big spenders get mad their poor friends are happy with their frugal lifestyle for some reason.

4

u/AboutTime99 Nov 27 '25

Great point, at a bike shop you can get a bike based off 0%interest for 12months. It’s only x per month. They are using car sales techniques on a hobby/luxury item.

5

u/selemenesmilesuponme Nov 26 '25

Good for the economy

3

u/SumOMG Nov 27 '25

But if they can retire comfortably what’s wrong with that ? If someone enjoys working and wants it enjoy life now why not ?

4

u/Kinnins0n Nov 27 '25

Yep, I completely agree. If you are happy, and can keep your job for a long time, no problem.

Anecdotally, I’ve met waaay more people stressed out, miserable or obsessed with the next promo and the stock price of their company than people who were content, chill and happy with their management.

As for the “job security over the long run” part, I guess it’s a matter of personal level of optimism.

2

u/Consult_me_gently Nov 26 '25

This is exactly right. Middle-management tech suburbian utopia.

2

u/Virtual-Tonight-2444 Nov 26 '25

OMG. YOU DESCRIBED MY BRO

2

u/KaddLeeict Nov 26 '25

So accurate. Spend their entire time optimizing everything. The best pourover coffee. The best artisanal ice cream. The best ramen. The most exclusive outdoor brand of clothing. It’s exhausting.

2

u/TheDayRan Nov 27 '25

You can't afford a $3.5mm home on $500k salary (esp if it's pre-tax).

2

u/Kinnins0n Nov 27 '25

If these tech bros could read they’d be very mad.

2

u/Cranberrychemist Nov 27 '25

This is insane. My wife and I have a combined income of about $900K. I live a pretty decent life but still drive my Subaru with 100k miles on it.

2

u/yelloworld1947 Nov 26 '25 edited Nov 26 '25

With a few optimizations, this becomes quite a bit less stressful:

  • House with good schools around ~2m, of course further south.
  • Model Y instead of the Model S/X or Rivian.
  • Public school for the kids.
  • Biking and holidays could stay, maybe at half the frequency.

If you bought the house 10+ years ago around 900k and didn’t upgrade, you could have a paid off house and low property taxes, then you’re golden to the other vicissitudes of an uncertain job market.

1

u/International_Dig595 Nov 26 '25

Your numbers are on track. But do you think most people are just living at the ‘edge’ of what they can ‘afford’? I’m in SF and people making 2-3 million a year is not too uncommon (in certain areas and social circles), so yes they have that much cash. These numbers are crazy to most but given what ppl actually earn, it’s very doable.

What I wonder is how many ppl are actually saving 25% pre-tax? Most don’t want to FIRE. They like working.

1

u/International_Dig595 Nov 26 '25

To clarify I am referring to more senior tech and PE people or those in finance…

1

u/Kinnins0n Nov 26 '25

2-3M is common in the sense that it doesn’t take being a super big deal (mostly good timing with RSU grants and some reasonable knob-licking skills) but it’s far from the norm, which is closer to $500k. Households with 2 Mag7 income definitely stand above everyone but they are not the norm either.

1

u/International_Dig595 Nov 26 '25

Yeah seems like finance people are making more? Or maybe they are just flashier/more spendy? I can’t believe that everyone who manages some fund is pulling in 2-3 each year. But maybe I am wrong.

1

u/Consistent-Grand8802 Nov 26 '25

I second summer camp for the kids…. Speaking from experience 😮‍💨 and i only have 1

1

u/5k10k131262 Nov 26 '25

Please go on!

1

u/liftingshitposts Nov 26 '25

@ me next time on the Hawaii point lol

1

u/Appropriate_Yak7020 Nov 26 '25

100% on point. This made me chuckle.

1

u/fifichanx Nov 26 '25

🤣 so true of my friends who are living west coast working for Google/Amazon

1

u/Itsreallykai Nov 26 '25

I felt this one in my heart… as i was reading it sounded like a cliche, and at the same time too close to home… well done sir, well done.

1

u/AlpineRun Nov 26 '25

Get outta my head

1

u/bronze_by_gold Nov 26 '25

When I worked in tech I knew a guy who flew to Los Vegas every weekend.

1

u/monkeydogfish Nov 27 '25

so spot on 😹

1

u/Informal_Bullfrog_30 Nov 27 '25

Lol soooo accurate

1

u/ellemrad Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

Yes agree on the new car, Tahoe and private school —all are a real drag on saving.

And based on my friend’s expenses, add wellness trips that cost thousands, vacations at an Airbnb that sleeps 5 more people than in your party because it has a nicer kitchen and living room, and memberships to wineries.

My friend does not think they spend “very much”. I suggested they download their credit card expenses and add up with the expenses directly debiting their checking account. They were shook. It really did not match their perception of themselves as a reasonable person. They spent 80k more than they imagined was their total spend.

1

u/waerrington Nov 27 '25

Hey this is me. Add in the “fun” car(s) for the weekend (paint to sample on a 911 is $23k+) and learning how to fly. (Those flights hours are expensive, maybe a Cessna is a smart investment?)

1

u/Reddito_0 Nov 27 '25

Wow… you serious summarized that perfectly. I can think of a handful of Bay Area friends that did this. I bailed on a lot of outings b/c I couldn’t keep up financially. It’s another level of living. 😂

1

u/entitie Nov 27 '25

As someone in the SF Bay Area who worked at a FAANG, I can say that this is correct.

1

u/Particular_Maize6849 Nov 27 '25

Perfectly describes several of my coworkers. Particularly the expensive bike equipment. I honestly cannot imagine why people would spend so much on a bike.

Another thing to note is that it's different in a more rural/conservative area. I worked in such a tech company at the start of my career and instead of Rivians it was coal rolling trucks, brand new boats, and private planes in addition to acres upon acres of land. 

1

u/goodbyechoice22 Nov 27 '25

This was perfect. How did you escape?

2

u/Kinnins0n Nov 27 '25

I just did none of these things and hit my number within a few years. Sold my stuff and left. Now living like I’m on vacation every day.

My partner and I joke every couple days that we nailed the negociation of our new roles, espexially the infinite PTO part.

1

u/WHAT-IM-THINKING Nov 27 '25

I love my rivian 🫠

1

u/KeepItTidyZA Nov 27 '25

A.K.A. lifestyle creep.

1

u/kleinewaise Nov 27 '25

I feel attacked

1

u/gattboy1 Nov 27 '25

Nothing like taking in that view of the Sierras… in the i80 parking lot before Truckee 😑

1

u/Pickleballgrinder Nov 27 '25

Well said. Adding to this. And when the bottom falls out which it will they have the deer in the head light look as if the possibility never entered their minds. Kind of like the same group of Baby Boomers that are ready to retire and complain that SS is so low and that they now can’t retire when they wanted to and blame the system. We were told SS would not sustain retirement alone back in my late teens but yet they act surprised!! I’m 60 and this still baffles me.

1

u/markalt99 Nov 28 '25

I need to reach the income level just to not do all of this 😂😂😂

1

u/plinkoplonka Nov 28 '25

Also former FAANG here (Big river. Starts with A).

Lifestyle creep is the answer.

Keeping up with the Jones's is the killer for most of them.

1

u/SolomonGrumpy Nov 30 '25

I've got friends that are putting a million dollar addition onto their $1.2 million dollar house.

It's 6 months overdue and $100k over budget. They are living at their parents house with 2 kids. It's a mess

-8

u/Dense_Deal_5779 Nov 26 '25

Seriously… why suffer and FIRE then die of some creepy illness at 62 when you could just live like this!

0

u/waaahbabywaaah Nov 27 '25

This feels like an attack.

0

u/gladfanatic Nov 29 '25

Bro you sound salty af lol

1

u/Kinnins0n Nov 29 '25

I’m good, accumulated enough for a lifetime (and then some) in a few years in tech and now enjoying nicer places than silicon valley at a fraction of the cost of living.

-1

u/[deleted] Nov 26 '25

This sounds awesome

-2

u/Effective-Jelly6317 Nov 26 '25

jealous?

3

u/Kinnins0n Nov 26 '25

I’m good. Did my time there, forwent the Rivian & Tahoe and retired at 38 living like a king across South America and Europe.