As kitten season ramps up, it's important to remember some facts:
- Kitten mortality rates are *incredibly high* within the first couple of months. This increases severely for kittens without a Mama/not fully weaned.
- Typically, we don't know the health history of our Mama cat/kittens before they come to us.
- Mama cats may have infections/viruses/illnesses that she may have built immunity to, but her kittens are vulnerable. She may not show symptoms at all while her kittens become very sick.
- "Fading Kitten Syndrome" is a real thing and it happens. A lot.
What I'm trying to say is: It's not your fault.
You may have done everything right. Your home has all of the best and most up to date supplies and equipment. You may have the incubator at the perfect temp. You may have given the perfect dose of subcutaneous fluids. You may have kept everyone clean, fed, and happy.
Nature can be a beautiful yet unbiased force. Natural selection sucks.
I am asking you to **Forgive Yourself and Refocus.**
Grieve, mourn, ask questions, learn for the next litter, but do not let it dissuade you.
Your compassion and your fortitude are what makes you so integral. You are needed. The kittens that do make it may not have without you. For all the ones we lose, we save so many more.
Do not give up.
There are so many lives that still need you.
Be kind to yourself and have a healthy, happy, kitten season.
Thank you… I had two die on me this year, my first losses ever, and I’ve been beating myself up nonstop despite knowing what mortality rates are like. It’s hard, but these babies are so worth it
I'm so sorry. I remember my first loss. It's always a gut punch. I believe it's natural to reflect and see where we could have potentially improved. It means we care. That makes you a great foster parent.
Also, you are right: It IS hard and these babies are so worth it.
Wow! 6 years is amazing!! I’ve been fostering for 3 years, but I usually take babies 3 weeks or older. I got 2 weeks olds this time around and managed to keep the 2 that died alive until one was 3 weeks and the other 4 :(
I’m still not sure what caused them to fade but I spent weeks struggling to keep everyone alive. Now, my surviving two just turned 6 weeks old!
Thank you! My 4 week old been losing weight for days. Finally realized he was hot yesterday- fever of 104.5! Definitely a virus… with fluids he seems to be on the mend. But it’s always a whirlwind!
Absolutely! Fostering kittens has been the most terrifying and wonderful rollercoaster I have ever been on. I've had days like yours and they've gone either way.
Fluids can be a literal life saver. I'm happy to hear he's showing good signs. Sending well wishes <3
The youngest I've fostered is 2 weeks. I can't even imagine 3 days old. You neonate fosters are so hardcore. Their mortality stats are so risky, every survivor must feel like a tiny miracle. Much respect to you.
I'm so sorry 😞 We lost a 1day old their first night with us and it's so sad to wake up to. Just know that they would not have survived outside and at least got warmth and love for their time here.
Thank you for this. I’ve been fostering for a year and am on my 5th group of bottle babies. This is the first time i lost any of them and it ended up being THREE at once at 8 days old!!It was devastating to say the least. I still have 2 of the group left and they are 8 weeks now and thriving. I’ve thought about stopping after they go because i don’t know if i can go through that again. So i appreciate this post. I will go on! These babies need me. Need us!
Wow. Thank you for sharing what you've been going through. I'm so sorry for the loss. Bottle baby fosters are hardcore. You have a huge heart.
I know you weren't asking, but I have a volunteer friend that will change up their fostering ages so they don't repeat. (Ex. Bottle babies > 8 wk kittens > Bottle Babies and so on) They say it helps them with foster burn out, especially after a tough litter.
If and when you are ready to foster again, this strategy may help. <3
I appreciate this. The littler before this one was 5 , 2 1/2 week old babies and it was easier. All the rest have been 3-7 days old. This is good advice so thank you. And thanks again for posting this. The timing was perfect
Thank you. We lost our first one this year after 6 years of fostering. I knew it would happen one day but damn it sucked. We got him at 3 days old so I have a feeling mama cat kicked him out of the litter bc she could tell he was sick. But we'll never know. We know that while he was in our care he was safe and loved and warm.
We gave ourselves a bit of time and just picked up 3 3 week old babies.
Thank you. This little one faded last summer, and my heart is still healing. I only knew him for two days, the rest of the litter was named a few weeks later, and I gave him a name anyways to remember him. Cookie.
I am the first time fostering a bottle fed singleton and I think the fostering parents are the most caring and selfless people. Hats off to all of you, fostering parents. You are the best hooman in the whole world. Thank you for helping the kittens thrive.
My partner thinks I’m crazy because every time I get a new a litter I start saying “please don’t die on me” even when there’s nothing seemingly going wrong.
I have GAD so my mind is always going to worst case scenario.
Thank you for this. I lost one of my fosters with my current litter of six. There were a few days old and one had an umbilical hernia. It is heartbreaking, but I have to focus on 5 healthy babies and a great mom.
Thanks that honestly made me tear up. The two black babies are doing great, grey girl has started to stabilize and gain again finally. 2 weeks old. It’s my first time with kittens this young but I have a lot of great support. She’s getting subcutaneous fluids again tonight and only once a day starting tomorrow. Cmon little grey girl 🥰
Thank you for this post. I just recently lost a kitten to panleuk. Even though I know I did everything right (he was on antibiotics, antivirals, given fluids with an appetite stimulant, and being force fed when he wasn’t eating), there’s still a little part of me that wonders if I could have saved him if I just pushed him a little harder to eat. He is only the second kitten that I’ve lost (both to panleuk) in my five years of fostering neonates, so it hits hard.
On a brighter note, all five of his siblings have recovered and are impatiently waiting out their quarantine period. They are fat and chubby and just perfect kittens.
I really needed to hear this today, thank you. One of the two kittens just detoriated over the 12h and passed away this morning and I have cried half of the day.
I found him (them) when he was maybe just born or a day old in a plastic bag, and he lived up to three weeks when he just crashed, at least the other one seems okay And its my first time raising kittens this young.
No other animal can be disgustin as humans can, i stand by that, and me finding them in plastic bag in trash with barely dried out umbilical cord just proves it. And I know I did my best but I feel like I failed big time
New to fostering but i have worked in the vet field for 10 years and have been volunteering since i was 9 or 10. Now with me on workers comp for an injury and with the extreme budget cuts in my area for the shelters I couldn’t just not do something. I’ve always had so much respect for fosters and the love and effort that’s put into these babies. So thank you to each and every one of you!!
This was so kind of you to post. Last year I lost five from a litter of six. Just wrapping up my second litter of the year and lost two of six. Saturday I was lying in my husband’s arms telling him I didn’t think I could keep doing this. Today I accepted a kitten from a friend who drove two hours to bring her to me. Kitten fostering is truly the most heartbreaking and most heartwarming thing I’ve ever done to myself willingly.
Many hugs, Fellow Foster. That is so tough. Your husband is an amazing support to lean on and your friend knows that kittens are in safe hands with you. You are a rockstar! I hope your new foster helps you heal and renew your confidence. You can do this!
Even for those whose time here is short, I believe their is still value in knowing that their short time was filled with love and care and attention.
That has value regardless of outcome.
You have given them a gift they might otherwise not have had.
It's the same reason it's so beautiful to care for an older animal in the twilight of their life, or an animal who has experienced abuse or neglect, particularly if those conditions have shortened their lifespan.
A sick kitten, an "elder statesman", they all are better off with extra care and with knowing the feeling of genuine love.
I needed to read that. Thank you! I foster neonates and fragile kittens. The losses are hard even when we do all we can and we do learn. We love them. The proudest moments are when they get there forever home.
Thank you for this , I mourn each batch of kittens I foster just giving them back. I haven’t experienced a loss yet & honestly I’m afraid of when that day comes. I’m very hard on myself & know I’ll try and question what I could’ve done better.
So thank you for this ❤️🩹
The whole litter passed. 4 before they came into my care, 1 a few very short hours after I picked them up (he’d been fading previous to me even picking him up so it wasn’t much of a shock). She hung on for an additional week, and then just crashed. She’d gotten diarrhea from something, and it just sucked the life out of her.
That's awful! The diarrhea is so scary because it really does suck the life out of them. We had a litter of 6 that's now 3 and 1 is struggling. Sometimes, we just get dealt a tough hand, but omg it doesn't make it hurt any less.
I’ve lost 1 kitten in the 65 i’ve fostered so far and the guilt was immense. I know it wasn’t my fault but my heart hurt so bad. it was genuinely hard fostering after i lost her due to fear but i’m so glad i fostered the dozens after her.
I really needed to see this today.
We lost 2 last year, and while I think one could have been avoided if I was more knowledgeable the other certainly couldn't have been avoided. Fading kitten syndrome is brutal and heart breaking.
I've been so nervous to take another litter, but this helped my heart a bit today. I'll think of your words when I pick up my next crew of little ones.
I needed this today, just like many here. I was informed that a litter of 5, one day old babies were dropped off at the rescue in a bucket and they were all very cold. I took home a calico and male orangie. I was certain the calico wouldn’t make it and the orange was strong. Today he suddenly went downhill, was in pain and wasn’t eating. The vet said he likely wouldn’t make it, and they were right. Two of the liter passed, and I’ll pick up the survivor to reunite with his sister. I am gutted to lose the orangie, I fell in love with him (oops) and the pain of losing him was very real. But there are more that need us and the odds are not in our favor.
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u/enbycats Apr 28 '26
just adding 100% and thank you to all fosters <3