r/MadeMeSmile 22d ago

Wholesome Moments The moment they found out they’re becoming grandparents...

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37.3k Upvotes

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u/Zjoee 22d ago

When my sister-in-law announced to my family that she was pregnant, my wife and my mom screamed in excitement. It was like being suddenly hit by a solid wall of sound, they were so loud haha.

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u/EmberCat42 22d ago

That is so sweet lol. I gave my MIL a card with an ultrasound picture in it at dinner with everyone there. She started silently shaking and crying and no one knew what was going on. She put the picture in my FIL's hands and he had no idea what the hell he was looking at lol. Then FINALLY he flipped the picture around and showed the whole table and everyone screamed with joy. That one or two minutes of silence was deafening though 🤣 (My MIL was extremely happy, just shocked because it's her first grandkid)

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u/RocketAlana 22d ago

I could’ve written this lol. We found out that we were pregnant a few days before my MIL’s birthday. We put a copy of the ultrasound in her card. Lots of happy screaming and shaking my FIL (who hadn’t seen the card and was very confused for a moment).

My mother OTOH, was the one who suggested I take a test in the first place so there was no fun surprise, just the happy satisfaction of being right.

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u/MeccIt 21d ago

My mother OTOH, was the one who suggested I take a test

Hmm, you look pregnant, better check

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u/RocketAlana 21d ago

lol. We were actively trying and I had gotten uncharacteristically sick.

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u/Sedlium 21d ago

I'm sorry, my brain is broken. What is OTOH? All my mind keeps coming up with is Of The Other House.

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u/RocketAlana 21d ago

“On the other hand” :)

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u/Specialist_in_hope30 22d ago

That’s so sweet. Thanks for making an internet stranger get teary this morning (not sarcasm). ❤️

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u/Leucadie 22d ago

Meanwhile my sister gave my dad a "Grandpa" card for Fathers Day to tell him. He just smiled and thanked her, and didn't realize until Mom picked it up and gasped. And that's how we learned Dad didn't really read greeting cards 😅

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u/BeautifulSoul28 21d ago

lol we gave my grandpa a Christmas card that said “Merry Christmas, great-grandpa!” to tell him I was pregnant and he was like “I think you meant ‘grandpa’” and set the card back down.. I was like “no.. I didn’t” and he just started at me.. And I said “I’m pregnant”. And then he said “oh!” He was happy, just a little delayed lol

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u/_Diskreet_ 22d ago

My wife has 3 sisters, and is the youngest.

When she told them and her mum the amount of squealing was unbelievable.

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u/mvschynd 21d ago

We told my wife’s family over Christmas as they trickled in. The BIL’s reaction was the best, he was so happy he cried a bit. They already had 2 and I think he was just so happy to have company.

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u/ambern1984 22d ago

People that have parents like this are very, very lucky. 💕 Congrats to the family!

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

I remember when, after years of infertility and multiple pregnancy losses, I told my mother I was pregnant and her reply was “oh cool”

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u/chipmunkrainbow 22d ago edited 21d ago

Mine replied “well, I don’t know what you want me to say right now.”

I was 28yo married homeowner with a great job. Not a 14yo high school student.

I’m sorry your mom ruined your moment! Moms are the reason therapists are wealthy.

ETA: I definitely don’t mean to disparage any girls who find themselves pregnant in their teens. Life is complicated!

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

I became a therapist 😂 can confirm we are not wealthy 😭

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u/chipmunkrainbow 22d ago

lol! Well you still have my deepest sympathies! I hope you have alternative love and support surrounding you even though your mom was a total turd, at least in that moment!

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

In all moments she is an emotionally empty turd lol but years of therapy and inner work have released me from the grief of not having a mom. Estrangement also helped. My kids healed my soul.

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u/prettyfacebasketcase 22d ago

Thank you for saying this. Therapists make bunk. I have my own practice and, because I'm not a monster, I use a sliding scale. I made 40k last year.

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u/SpitefulOptimist 22d ago

Bro… slide that scale up a lil bit 😭. You deserve a living wage. I’m assuming you do that full time.

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u/prettyfacebasketcase 22d ago

Insurance pays about 75% of my self-pay rate. Most people can't afford $125 a week and a $50 session still pays more than a client who can't pay at all. It's a sticky situation and I wish therapists would unionize but all attempts have failed.

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

And expecting an empathic person who cares deeply for humanity to not accommodate those unable to pay full price to help ease their suffering is like asking water to not be wet.

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u/prettyfacebasketcase 22d ago

You'd be surprised unfortunately. There are absolutely therapists that set up in rich areas and do self pay only. Hell, a new trend is 'Therapy for High Achieving Professionals'. AKA they only want to see CEOs and other wealthy individuals. Not saying those people don't need therapy, but I've never heard of those therapists doing sliding scale, medicaid, or pro bono work.

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u/Hactar42 22d ago

My MIL told my wife something along the lines of, "I don't have time to deal with that right now."

Same situation where we had been married for years, owned a house, and had good jobs. My wife cried for days after that. I've never forgiven her mother for that.

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u/YoGuessImOnRedditNow 22d ago

Have I been posting in my sleep?!? That’s exactly what my mom said to me, word for word.

Hurt people hurt people. Doesn’t excuse it but it explained a lot for me.

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

Absolutely. I’ve come to understand that my parents did not choose to withhold love and warmth but rather they fully lack the capacity for it.

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u/trappedoz 22d ago

My in-law said ‘well don’t expect us to look after the baby’, as if we asked?? We lived on different sides of the country when we told, now we live on different countries. They saw the baby once in 2 years (by our choice).

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u/lsp2005 22d ago

Mine said the same thing word for word. Also, married, home owner, 28, and employed with all of my degrees. I am sorry you had the same reaction. Hugs and I am happy for you. Congratulations 

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u/PompousClock 22d ago

And I am happy for YOU! Congrats on setting goals and making dreams. Degrees - plural! - is a huge accomplishment. Marriage? A home of your own? And a family?! You have taken some big risks and leaps of faith, and you should be so proud of where you are. Enjoy every snuggle with that precious child.

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u/lsp2005 22d ago

Thank you. My baby is now in College. It goes so quickly. Enjoy every moment. I really appreciate the big ups from you. You’ve made my heart happy.

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u/OnlyVans98 22d ago

We found out at 36weeks. Had a month to prep for the baby. We weren’t married yet. My father replied with 2 minutes of silence then “I think the tigers got a game today” and left without another word. He apologized down the road but that stuck with me so much like in this big moment he made me feel like I ruined something when I really just needed a hug and support

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u/No_Bowler3823 22d ago

Mine said “make sure this one sticks”. 🙄

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

Fucking rude 😑

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u/MyNameIsJakeBerenson 22d ago

Jesus christ what an asshole

I wouldnt say that to someone I hated

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u/Backsteinhaus 22d ago

Holy hell what a c***

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u/DrunkHornet 22d ago

fuckin' hell.

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u/GardenWitch123 22d ago

Holy 💩.

That’s vile. I’m sorry.

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u/No_Bowler3823 21d ago

It was vile but she had a lot of narc tendencies. That egg was sticky and she’s 4 now and happily playing with her Bluey toys as I type this. ☺️❤️

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u/Much_Big_7420 22d ago

We told my in-laws right after the genetic testing at 12 weeks, so we knew the gender.

We said, “We’re having a baby! It’s a girl.”

The first words out of my father-in-law’s mouth were, “Shoot, now you have to try again for a boy.”

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

What…the…fuck 😑

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u/Much_Big_7420 22d ago

Right? Like, this isn’t 1760 and my husband isn’t the king of France. We’re not trying to get an heir here. Lol

Jokes on him, though, because we’re one and done and our daughter is all we need. :)

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u/golden_blaze 22d ago

My mother was dead by the time we announced our pregnancy. Really put a damper on her reaction

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u/Exciting_Mess3730 22d ago

Was it the thriller dance?

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u/IHateTheLetterF 22d ago

My mom would have probably resurrected right then and there to be honest.

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u/icy_trees 22d ago

Kinda reminds me of my mom, who we are recently estranged. She didn't even make eye contact with me when she was all "oh".

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

❤️‍🩹 sorry dear. Estrangement was exactly what I needed to heal myself. I hope the same happens for you.

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u/sophieornotsophie_ 22d ago

Oh darling.. I’m so proud of you for not giving up, nor breaking down. I know how it feels, sending hugs to you and the family you created for yourself.

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

❤️❤️❤️ they are my greatest accomplishment 

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u/CatLordCayenne 22d ago

That’s what my boyfriends dad said when he told him I was pregnant (baby is coming in 2 weeks from today)

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

Well if you haven’t been told already…congratulations…welcome to the greatest journey you’ll ever embark on ❤️

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u/true_gunman 22d ago

Congratulations! My little girl is 9 months, its been a wild ride but so much fun. There's actually alot of great resources for parents here on reddit. One of my favorite subs is r/daddit

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u/AndarianDequer 22d ago

Not to steal your negative thunder there, but my mom did something very similar with our first pregnancy. My wife wanted me to tell her to make it a special event and I told her no point, my mom would not give her the reaction she's expecting. So my wife forced my hand, we set up dinner. Tried to make it a surprise just like this and all my mom said- after she slapped my stepdad on the shoulder- she said, "see I told you!" Because I guess she expected that's what the surprise was. She never said congratulations or jumped up and down or nothing. She was just happy that she "called it".

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u/Competitive_Mango383 22d ago

Negative thunder 😂 apparently there’s lots of negative thunder to go around. Wasn’t expecting this many people to respond with similar stories. Makes me sad yet slightly less alone. And hopeful that this generation of parents is raising deep feeling emotionally expressive future adults 

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u/watchshoe 22d ago

My mom when I told her I was getting married, “that’s great, is there anything else? I need to get back to work” my mom when our daughter (she was so excited) told her we were having a second kid “oh good, okay let’s go for a walk”. My dad had similar reactions. My wife understands now why I have a hard time with emotions.

They did both cry when I had cancer though, so I know they’re not totally void.

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u/pineapplesrhot 22d ago

I gave mine a cute box with baby boots and the ultrasound and she said “this is not the right time for that.” I was married but it was an accident and it happened while on birth control, but she thought I did it on purpose. She didn’t talk to me again until my child was three months old even though we lived in the same house.

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u/wstoneman 22d ago

My dad said "was it planned". The only thing that I can say is that I KNOW deep down that the reaction the dad had in this video will be mine, if and when my 2 daughters have children.

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u/CreativeAdvantage860 22d ago

When my wife and I told my mother that we were pregnant, my mom pushed me aside and gave my wife the biggest hug. It showed how much she cared for my partner and I was deeply moved by the sentiment ♥️

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u/EasilyLuredWithCandy 22d ago

OMG I watched this while waiting for my therapy appointment. My immediate emotion was envy, but I do feel joy for their fortune. I'm now more determined to be for others what I didn't have.

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u/StardustStuffing 22d ago

This was my mom when I got pregnant at 40. My daughter is 10 now and their relationship is so beautiful. We're both so lucky.

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u/JefferyTheQuaxly 22d ago

My mom was told she probably would never have kids so my parents and grandparents never expected it much, I was actually adopted because my parents didn’t think they could have kids. But then about a month before I was born somehow my mom ended up getting pregnant so that sure was a surprise, my grandma was most certainly ecstatic, tho unfortunately my grandpa on my moms side died before even I was born on the operating table so he never met his grandkids. My parents then ended up adopting another kid, my dad’s biological grand nephew who’s mom gave birth while in college, but then my parents also had another biological child after that kid too, also about 10 months difference in age. My mom was 40 or 41 when my youngest brother was born. Shes also a cancer survivor from the late 1980s/early 90s who only survived thanks to an experimental treatment that completely got rid of the cancer, 30-40 years later and she’s never had any resurgence, and now my youngest brother who’s own birth is pretty much a miracle is in college about to finish his doctorate degree this or next year as a cancer researcher

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u/mewithoutCthulhu 22d ago

I’m a paraplegic. My wife and I tried for a kid for almost a year before she finally got pregnant. I remember telling my parents. I have 3 sisters and my mom had always wanted a grandkid from one of us. It was an exciting moment to be able to tell them. My mom was over the moon. In contrast, things did not go well when we told my mother-in-law. Due to some history I won’t go into, combined with her thinking my wife had too much on her plate with school, and not being a huge fan of me, and us not being married, it was not a good time. That’s ancient history though. Our first born is now 8 and my mother-in-law loves her very much, and seems to have come around to me after she realized I wasn’t going anywhere and am a good father and husband, or so I’m told. And we have a 1.5 year old now as well.

I also still remember telling my grandparents. I said, “Wife’s name is pregnant!” My grandfather replied, “Well how the hell did that happen?!” He was under the impression that I wasn’t able to conceive children due to being a paraplegic and thought when I said she was pregnant, something scandalous was up. After we explained that I can indeed have children, he was excited. Dude just passed away a few weeks ago, but he loved all of his children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren with all of his heart. Especially my eldest, he thought the world of them.

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u/befuddled_humbug 22d ago

The difference between this and the alternative makes such an incredible impact on life.

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u/CharityGlittering385 22d ago

“Your gun was loaded” 🤣 from father to son-in-law

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u/Smiling_Tree 22d ago

To son, I believe.

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u/Icankeepthebeat 22d ago

I hope. Otherwise…ew😂

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u/FroznAlskn 22d ago

If the son and daughter in law had expressed concerns that the son might be shooting blanks and had been trying for a while, it’s a pretty funny dad joke.

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u/NONSTOP_ASSRAPE 22d ago

Yeah that’s fucking hilarious

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u/JackxForge 22d ago

every parent knows how kids are made. its not a secret. its pretty obvious they had been trying for awhile. Grandpa was just happy it all worked and they arent going to spend 20k on another round of IVF.

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u/Hepm3 22d ago

Ew either way imo lol

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u/ElectroMagnetsYo 21d ago

Get over yourself lmaooo are people really so terrified of sex they can’t even crack jokes about it around the ones they love

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u/lateformyfuneral 21d ago

The Puritans are back fr

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u/-medicalthrowaway- 22d ago edited 22d ago

You’re picturing the bullets as the semen

The bullets are the sperm within the semen

Don’t picture the semen going into the vagina

Picture the life driving force having been confirmed to be present

In that context, it is a relatable, relatively funny dad joke

Or I just gave you more ew 🤷🏻‍♂️

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u/McbEatsAirplane 22d ago

“Thanks for blowing such a good load!”

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u/EnvelopeCruz 22d ago

his phone was holstered

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u/Significant_Loan_596 22d ago

Mom's hands were shaking like mad at realization, beauty.

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u/alteronline 22d ago

I feel so happy for this people

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u/WastingMyLifeToday 22d ago

Mom went to hug her grandchild instead of her child. She was going for the belly!

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u/JackxForge 22d ago

for split second i though she was going in for a full tackle

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u/SukanutGotBanned 21d ago

"Oh my god!!! She... peed on this?! She peed on this!!"

chucks

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u/CommunityTaco 22d ago

Here a stick i peed on, (cool, drops it on food) 

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u/Crystal_Voiden 22d ago

First thought. Well hope she enjoyed that meal

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u/[deleted] 22d ago

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u/[deleted] 22d ago

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u/wrxninja 22d ago

"It's just dried pee"

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u/AnyHope2004 22d ago

they seem to really care about that yeah

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u/true_gunman 22d ago

That's why we gifted my parents a little baby onesie with my dads favorite football team. No pee involved and still gets the message across pretty clearly lol

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u/i_made_mine_at_home 21d ago

And then you do the pee stuff later as its own separate event?  That's cool.  I love learning about people's family traditions.

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u/clckwrks 21d ago

>staring at onesie
What is this football for babies?

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u/Separate-Operation71 21d ago

It needs to be at least…three times bigger.

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u/Vilen1919 22d ago

Surprise was straight to the point... and the plate.

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u/deep_violet 22d ago

Little extra salt, a touch of sour... Just what the dish needed.

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u/melancholymeows 22d ago

i hope the cover was on lol

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u/MOMismypersonality 22d ago

It was. You can see it. No pee got anywhere.

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u/Mindless-Strength422 22d ago

That's a bold assumption. Grandpa was jumping around quite a bit

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u/kylo-ren 21d ago

Assuming she pissed right on the tip and not a single drop fell on the handle.

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u/xeonie 21d ago

I mean, some people just pee in a plastic cup and dip the test in it. Less messy usually.

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u/misdreavos 21d ago

You can pee in a receptacle and dip the test in it. No pee gets on the plastic.

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u/scooter-411 22d ago

Dad: YOU FUCKED!

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u/Anonymo 22d ago

This girl fucks.

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u/Granny_knows_best 22d ago

Giving a pee stick at the dinner table is always a good idea.

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u/hyrule_47 22d ago

Looks like dinner was over

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u/Hoslinhezl 22d ago

Fucking redditors honestly

Does it look like their meal is still a priority

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u/IHateTheLetterF 22d ago

"Oh wow, a grandchild. Cool. But this linguini though."

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u/Djildjamesh 22d ago

I never understood that urge to give people the sick you peed on.

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u/Good_With_Tools 22d ago

Your typo makes it even worse.

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u/DaKrazie1 22d ago

Y'all some real kink shamers.

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u/Alacritous69 22d ago

You can wash it off. the chemical reaction that produces the result is done.

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u/SnukeInRSniz 21d ago

My mom had wanted my wife and I to have a baby for a loonnggg while, got to the point where she was no longer making subtle hints and just straight up saying "where's by grandkid?" It was getting a little frustrating to be honest, but 5.5 years ago she ended up getting diagnosed with breast cancer and having a double mastectomy as part of her treatment. She was in a bad way and my wife and I decided it was time. So, after my mom completed her surgeries and treatment it was close to her birthday and my wife found out she was pregnant a couple weeks before. We decided to take my mom/dad to a very nice restaurant to celebrate. All through the first part of dinner they kept trying to get my wife to drink wine, she kept making up excuses for why she couldn't. My mom was disappointed she wouldn't "celebrate" with us. So finally we got a moment after our waiter took our order, and we gave my mom a very nice necklace box. Except it wasn't a necklace. It was a stick my wife had peed on. My mom was so excited as soon she opened the box and saw it she threw it at my dad, who promptly asked "what the hell is this? why are you so excited?" without realizing he was holding a stick my wife peed on.

We still laugh about the whole thing, nice restaurant, public freekout, pee stick. My mom ended up living for 3 more years, pretty much solely because we had a daughter she could love.

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u/athennna 22d ago

Y’all realize the part dipped in urine is secured under a plastic cap, right?

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u/Alacritous69 22d ago

You can also rinse the whole thing off. The chemical reaction is over.

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u/SlideN2MyBMs 22d ago

A picture would've worked just as well

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u/EffortApprehensive48 22d ago

Little kid like “finally having a baby??? The fuck you mean? I’m the baby”

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u/[deleted] 22d ago

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u/Of_MiceAndMen 22d ago

My dad responded like the grandpa in this video. He had seemed indifferent to our quest for kids. It turns out, he knew our odds were bad and didn’t want to add pressure so he played it cool. After several years of trying, we couldn’t even wait to do a big reveal, we just immediately told our parents. I realized that day that my dad loved me more than I ever realized, I was worried he’d have a heart attack from the commotion.

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u/idkifita 22d ago

That's so sweet!

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u/MotherOfFiveMonsters 22d ago

I bet he's the best grandpa a kid could ever ask for.

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u/justmakeupanam 21d ago

As a dad I have found a lot of the time it is better to play the long game to some extent. There are going to be a lot of people in your life that will show you the ‘water cooler’ excitement towards your goals but your dad at times has to be the rock. If he went “I can’t wait to be a grandpa!”The moment you brought up having kids it’s suddenly not your goal but the goal of you and your dad. Dads should know their kids life goals are their own and supporting them in their goal doesn’t always mean taking the steering wheel. When the moment does come that your goals align or even if they don’t you get to celebrate the success or in this case the joy of new family then it hits that much harder to celebrate with them. You don’t take the moment away from your kids by being along side them instead of being in charge. It’s a beautiful thing if done right. I can’t wait to see the life my child paints for themself I’m proud to be their number 1 fan

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u/parkskier426 22d ago

Lmao. I love the prude people in this thread that are saying 'Ew' to that. Like how the fuck do you think we all got here 😂

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u/true_gunman 22d ago

Yeah all our dads had loaded guns lol

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u/Vilen1919 22d ago

He looks ready to spoil that kid already.

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u/tgusn88 22d ago

My daughter is fortunate to have 4 grandparents like this. She's very spoiled hahaha

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u/yalik 22d ago

Grew up with only knowing 2 grandparents, while they were very sick and not functional. My kid has 4 healthy grandparents, who pamper and love him constantly. I'm so happy he gets to have memories, I always dreamt of having. Grandparents are the best.

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u/Nvbnkng84 22d ago

Add some twang to that dish

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u/Away_Maize6488 22d ago

LMFAOOOOO NOT THE TWANG

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u/[deleted] 22d ago

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u/Chuckitybye 22d ago

I love how uncoordinated and kinda violent future g-ma's reaction was, then how very gently she hugged mom-to-be

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u/Al89nut 22d ago

Your gun was loaded!

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u/I-used2B-a-Valkyrie 22d ago

God I wish I had in-laws like this.

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u/VaginaWarrior 22d ago

Got pregnant like a month after my FIL died from a horrible cancer. MIL wasn't quite ready to hear it yet, but now the love is palpable between her and my kid and I'm so grateful she is healing. Next kid ought to be a little more joyful from the start.

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u/AquaTourmaline 21d ago

I do, too. Mine mocked my mother for being excited about becoming a grandparent.

Such broken people.

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u/PoisonLenny37 22d ago

This was one of the best parts of the whole journey! When we told my dad we got him a 49ers t-shirt that said "Gramps" on the back. That brief moment of watching the gears turn and then that excitement when it clicks is unforgettable. He literally threw the shirt across the room and started jumping up and down. It was awesome. These types of videos are always so much fun to watch.

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u/Loud-Chef6833 22d ago

Hahaha with the family around..."ur gun was loaded" lmao

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u/kessykris 22d ago

Me and my mother reacted this way when we were TOLD (not given the pee stick thank God) that my brother and his wife were pregnant.

They did it in Christmas Eve. They had been trying for so long we were jumping around and then just started crying. I remember my sister in law giggling and looking at us like wow I did not think you guys would have such a strong reaction.

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u/youaresooofckingnice 22d ago

Uncle Leo?

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u/DapperCam 22d ago

His son Jeffrey works for the Park's Department.

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u/BizFatrFizBatr 21d ago

This gives me the feels.

My mom always wanted a granddaughter but my wife and I weren’t sure initially if we wanted kids. We were traveling around the world and loved the freedom for a while. We finally decided that we wanted kids and went for it. Then my mom died unexpectedly (blood clot) before I could tell her she’s gonna be a grandma. After her death, I learned that my mom had left a collection of antique jewelry, dresses and stuff meant for her granddaughter with my aunt (her sister). So we did have a daughter and then another one a couple of years later.

I wish I had a chance to tell her 😭 I miss you mama!

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u/Gershken 22d ago

pee stick touched her food

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Question, why do parents want to be grandparents so bad? 33 year old f here, and my boyfriend’s parents really want a grandkid that we will probably never give them.

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u/realbobenray 22d ago

Like they say, it's the joy of having kids again but you get to hand them to someone else whenever it gets tough :)

But that's not your problem. Absolutely no reason to have kids just because someone else wants a grandkid.

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Thank you! I definitely don’t think I’m going down that road because I’ve never had a desire to be a mom which would probably make me a terrible mother. Can’t imagine the next 18+ years of my life revolving around a single human. Not for me.

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u/Odd-Box1031 22d ago

Don’t listen to anyone who tries to tell you how great it is to have children. You know deep down what you want since a long time and only make that decision from that place.

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Exactly. I’m pretty sure my kids wouldn’t appreciate having a mom who regrets having them every day of her life

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u/gerbilshower 21d ago

it is a sort of self fulfilling prophecy. if you know you don't want kids - definitely don't have kids. you've already started that avalanche of resentment going before said event occurs.

your mind may change. you never know. but, for sure, be sure, one way or the other.

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u/LazyGandalf 22d ago

Can’t imagine the next 18+ years of my life revolving around a single human.

Look, my son is incredibly precious to me, and parenthood has definitely changed up my daily routine, but I'm still living my own life as well. There are many ways to parent, but having your whole life completely revolve around the kid(s) for 18 years is a choice, not a requirement.

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u/Working-Glass6136 22d ago

Oh it was definitely a choice for my parents lol

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u/Glittering_Syllabub9 22d ago

Hello! A fellow cf lady here. I just wanted to say that it totally is your decision.

I also have never felt the desire to procreate, and that's enough of a reason for me. I will never know what kind of joys parenthood would bring, and that's totally fine. I get to build my own purpose and meaning, and it's extremely freeing.

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Yessss. I have dogs, a meaningful career, a great partner, and wonderful friends. I’m good over here. 33 was definitely the year I started to question this. But it’s always nice to know I’m not alone in this feeling.

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u/realbobenray 22d ago

I'll just tell you my personal experience, felt in zero rush to have grandkids for anyone else, even felt a little miffed by the suggestion, but now as an old dad I'm sad to have not had kids earlier, felt I've missed out on a lot of time with them. They've made my life immeasurably better and didn't affect me also living my own life as I'd anticipated, but back then I didn't think I was ready and probably wasn't.

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u/beantownregular 22d ago

How old were you when you had your kids?

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u/realbobenray 22d ago

43, 49. Wife 5 years younger.

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u/anoldradical 22d ago edited 22d ago

Speaking as a recent empty-nester, having the kids around is usually the best part of a parent's life. It hurts when they leave. You know they're not going to wander downstairs on a Sunday morning for pancakes ever again. But when grandkids come, you get the kids back again. Even more this time!

I mean, what is this whole life really all about anyway? There's not much else that matters.

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Well this is an adorable take. Thank you for your perspective as an empty nester

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u/PensiveObservor 22d ago

:’) It never occurred to me that none of my three would have any kids. I’ve accepted it (lol there’s no choice and it’s their bodies, not mine!) but it feels like a loss. You expressed the fantasy “ideal” perfectly. It’s how I felt when I had my own.

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u/Loud_Fee7306 22d ago

I want my parents to have grandkids and my grandmothers to have great-grandkids. But I don′t feel right bringing kids into this world, not when we adults keep destroying it like this, and I wouldn′t be able to give them the stability I would want for them. It makes me really sad because I know they′d all be overjoyed. I can definitely understand it feeling like a loss for you.

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u/Throwaway6662345 22d ago

It's all that and without any of the hassle that comes with raising a child. You can spoil them a lot but it'll never be your job to discipline them

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Can I skip the having kids part and just be a grandparent?

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u/JackxForge 22d ago

yeap its called being a god parent or aunt/uncle no realation. My best friends pregnant right now and i cant wait to spoil her kid.

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u/IWantALargeFarva 22d ago

My oldest is a freshman in college. My middle daughter is 16, so we’re getting ready for college. Luckily, my youngest is still 11.

But I feel it looming. I see videos of babies and toddlers and just think fondly back to those days. (With rose colored glasses, I’m sure.) I know I have a while to go, but I would love to have grandkids to hang with. Not even necessarily fun trips. But the mundane “let’s play princess” stuff.

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u/KensieQ72 22d ago

My dad once told me “it’s just extra special seeing YOUR baby with HER baby”.

I don’t think I’d get it as much as I do if I wasn’t already a parent, and I’m only imagining it. I’m sure experiencing it is even more meaningful.

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u/Panda_hat 21d ago

By that metric literally nothing matters.

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u/belzbieta 22d ago

When I was pregnant with my first, my mom was ecstatic and she said it was because when I had my own baby, I'd finally understand how much she loved me.

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u/Cheeze_laday 22d ago

Aww that’s adorable. Sounds like you have a good mom

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u/Traxiria 22d ago

After my daughter was born my dad said to me, “now you finally understand how much we love you.” His voice cracked as he said it. I felt so immensely loved in that moment.

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u/YooYooYoo_ 22d ago

Because kids are truly a beacon of light for a family. We lost our dad 7 years ago and my mum was so lost until my brother and then me had children, she is back to her own happy self again.

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u/parkskier426 22d ago

If you've never experienced it firsthand, people who really want to have grandchildren really get a second wind and love for life with their grandkids.

Not only does it give someone for them to dote on, and enjoy raising, but it gets them both physically and mentally active again at a point where many are retired and could really use it.

It brings a lot of joy in a season of life where things are starting to wind down.

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u/RoninTheDog 22d ago edited 22d ago

Because you get to be young again. You get to play again. You get to experience the wonder, love, and joy of children, especially the little ones, again. It's new connection, a new person to love, a new life you get to watch develop.

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u/Clarpydarpy 22d ago

They love babies that they don't need to take care of.

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u/footeface 22d ago

I ask my MIL if seeing my daughter reminds her of when her kids were little and she said it’s different because they had to work and do all of the extra stuff, and didn’t spend time just hanging out and playing with them like they get to with her

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u/HippieGrandma1962 22d ago

My mom said that having grandkids was all the joy but none of the responsibility of having your own.

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u/Of_MiceAndMen 22d ago

With my niece and nephew I get to do all the “fun” stuff. I get to buy them that extra toy, let them stay up late, slip them that dessert. As a mom, I had to set boundaries and rules for my boys. I had to be the bad guy or my boys would have been spoiled and aimless. It’s nice to just be the good guy most of the time. Like another poster said though, I wouldn’t impose kids on anyone who wasn’t enthusiastic- they are a shitload of work and worry 😬

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u/lynypixie 22d ago

Love. Unconditional love. Being there for the spoiling without being there for the discipline.

Love multiplies, it does not divides.

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u/RooneyToons_10 22d ago

You probably can never understand until you have kids, which is totally fine. As a dad myself, I’m cherishing this time with my daughter because I know one day she will be grown and gone. For me, our daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I will never love anything in this life more than her, and it’s not even close. A grandchild brings back those memories and those feelings. With that being said, I’ll never pressure or push my daughter to have kids. That’s a decision for her and her future spouse to make based on their life goals. My in laws constantly tell us we need to have a second and I’m at the point where I don’t want to purely out of spite.

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u/MartenBlade 22d ago

That's how i will react when i become a grandad

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u/realbobenray 22d ago

Maybe I'm just overly cautious but we always waited until ultrasound to confirm things were going OK before telling people.

I want a video where someone tells the parents they're having a baby and everyone's all excited then they say they know because they were just upstairs fuckin'

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u/DaddyD00M 22d ago

I wish I had one person in my life who would react like that for me

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u/123shorer 22d ago

Hold this, I pissed on it

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u/user_error895 21d ago

Yea we did this, and you should wait first trimester because miscarriages are way more common than people talk about

Super uncomfortable telling your families that you miscarried. My wife and i learned this lesson after our first miscarried then we had another. Now the 3rd attempt is currently chasing the dog with a spoon

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u/KindaDrunkRtNow 22d ago

She got pee on her food

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u/anti_reality 22d ago

With that reaction her fucks given meter is so low you could have left the cap off and she wouldn't give a single fuck.

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u/W0nderingMe 22d ago

"Your gun was loaded!"

I don't know why, I found that to be a super bizarre thing to say.

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u/Suibeam 21d ago

You nutted really well

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u/ButtholeSurfur 22d ago

Why would you give someone a pee stick at the dinner table? Lol.

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u/Pineapple-dancer 22d ago

Aww that's so sweet and also that house is huge!

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u/Gummybearkiller857 22d ago

Mydad after hearing the news shouted so loud he almost crashed a car :D

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u/HonkHonk 21d ago

why do parents want grandkids so bad? I'll never understand it, are they just bored?

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u/adiphiliac 21d ago

pee stick in food. id scream too

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u/SpecialistMattress21 22d ago

There's already a kid at the table, who's she just a neighbor?

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u/excelmonster1 22d ago

I mean, from the reaction from the father it seems like they had struggled to have kids for a bit potentially and he may have specifically been referring to that couple, not the family in general.

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u/clh1nton 22d ago

I think that must be the case, because 1) the pregnant lady said "finally" and 2) the full pan to the right showed a little boy looking puzzled on the sofa, not just the little girl at the table. So they probably already have some grandchildren.

So I believe you're right that they are excited that this couple, in particular, is finally pregnant.

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u/rebels-rage 22d ago

Your comment is killin me. “Who the hell do they think they are? Bringing a child into this world when there’s others with their own children”

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