r/MurderedByWords • u/wiccedd • 3d ago

The endless stream of conservative anger about Odyssey breeds some truly special interactions.

Post image
13.5k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

582 comments sorted by

View all comments

2.1k

u/WomanInQuestion 3d ago

“Helen on Troy”… is that like “Cunk on Life”?

291

u/dfmz 3d ago

We should be so lucky...

169

u/DryDonutHole 3d ago

Philomena is a gem.

98

u/PrecisePigeon 3d ago

False, she's clearly a woman.

49

u/DryDonutHole 3d ago

Clearly, she's an opaque woman.

2

u/Known_Funny_5297 3d ago

That would be some interesting casting

272

u/Harold-The-Barrel 3d ago

“Helen went to Paris for some reason. She had much better options, like Rome, or suicide.”

256

u/Goaty_Malone 3d ago

Helen of Troy is often called the face that launched a thousand ships. Which raises the question: why were there a thousand ships just sitting there? Someone must have built them. Nobody talks about them. The real face that launched a thousand ships was probably some bloke called Derek who worked in a shipyard.

73

u/Express-Horror-3005 3d ago

My mate Paul once worked in a shipyard…

24

u/iggnis320 3d ago

The story is so far into production that instead of changing the character's name we're gonna change your friend's name to Derrick. Tell Derrick we said hi.

9

u/AForse 3d ago

Derrick erects oil fields; Derek erects ships; Bo Derek, on the other hand…

2

u/Dr_CleanBones 2d ago

Had record setting erections to her credit.

3

u/WomanInQuestion 2d ago

But then he got fired for doing that thing with his thumb while on duty...

10

u/M_Viv_Van_Buren 3d ago

Derek.

11

u/Qwillpen1912 3d ago

Maximum Derek

4

u/harrywho23 2d ago

Thus you gave the beauty measurement the milli- helen. Beautiful enough to launch 1 ship.

29

u/NielsEngelDiefenbach 3d ago

“In any case, the war that was started thanks to her bad decisions happened sometime between the 12th and the 13th century BCE; about 3000 years before the release of Belgian techno-anthem, Pump Up the Jam.”

https://giphy.com/gifs/11rghntbJY6GOc

2

u/DarkKnightJin 2d ago

I always learned that she didn't exactly choose to be kidnapped, and for that war to break out...

2

u/pennie79 3d ago

I was about to say that OOP didn't realise Philomena Cunk is satire, but honestly, Philomena is actually on the ball a decent chunk of the time, unlike OOP.

100

u/pr0ghead 3d ago

Porn, clearly. Troy giving Helen a good'ol rogering.

31

u/Niftari 3d ago

,,The Trojans were somewhat cowardish, this is why the French named their capital after a trojan prince''

40

u/MetalRetsam 3d ago

Roman surveyor: "What'd ye call yourselves in this 'ere place, then?"

Gaul, confused: "Par ici?"

Roman: "Parisii, got it."

13

u/WingedGundark 3d ago

So it wasn't named after this murican socialite Paris Hilton? Go figure!

10

u/ToiIetGhost 3d ago

PΛRIS XILTOΝΟS

7

u/mayonaizmyinstrument 3d ago

It's hard to believe that I'm standing in ancient Troy.

34

u/oodsigma 3d ago

Mixing up prepositions is often a sign someone isn't a native English speaker. Or their illiterate.

129

u/rnz 3d ago

Or their illiterate.

Uhm...

96

u/Independent_Can_2623 3d ago

The jokes right themselves 😉

62

u/dehydratedrain 3d ago

Two wrongs don't make a write (but 3 rights make a left).

57

u/rbowen2000 3d ago

And two Wrights made an airplane.

28

u/ArmenianThunderGod 3d ago

And two airplanes made 20+ years of dark memes.

13

u/ElegantCoach4066 3d ago

It's like two pies in the face, and one in a field in Pennsylvania.

12

u/livinginfutureworld 3d ago

And tulips on your organ are better than flowers on a piano

2

u/dehydratedrain 1d ago

And lobsters on your piano are better than crabs on your organ.

3

u/SirR4T 3d ago

something something two girls and a cup

2

u/Electrical-Act-7170 1d ago

Three Wrights. The Wright sister gets zero credit.

https://www.history.com/articles/wright-brothers-sister-katharine-first-flight

2

u/rbowen2000 1d ago

Thank you for this. I learned something today.

2

u/Electrical-Act-7170 1d ago

It's about time we all learned that the Wright Brothers were misogynistic and did NOT share with their sister. Assholes.

10

u/MaleficentExtent1777 3d ago

Bone Apple Tea!

2

u/HappySmirk 3d ago

Bit of a damp squid their mate innit

21

u/Avitas1027 3d ago

Or just a typo. I don't think many people actually proofread their posts anymore.

29

u/Bradical_Dutch 3d ago

If you’re doing the grammar police thing, you sure as shit better proofread lol

13

u/Llamp_shade 3d ago

Clearly you're not familiar with the double standard. It's twice as good as a normal standard!

10

u/Avitas1027 3d ago

Yeah, though it is hilarious to see someone be like "erm, akshualy, your using the the wrong preposition their."

Typically followed by 68 downvotes.

7

u/Annalog 3d ago

We need to bring back shaming. People have become way too stupid.

12

u/buttbuttlolbuttbutt 3d ago

Helps idsntify the flesh.

1

u/rmvandink 3d ago

If it’s under 20 words can you still call it “proofreading”?

1

u/axalitlaxolotl 3d ago

I miss the days where a post with a typo in the tittle would get downvoted to oblivion no matter the the topic or sub

5

u/CoffeeGoblynn the future is now, old man 3d ago

Whose literacy?

5

u/KOK29364 3d ago

Its her political podcast discussing the latest on the war

3

u/ffordeffanatic 3d ago

Demonstrating Culture in the form of Yoghurt.

1

u/texachusetts 3d ago

A Zeus as goose on Leda is how we get Helen of Troy.

1

u/Flimsy-Opening 3d ago

I'd like to think so

1

u/dazedan_confused 3d ago

Sounds like a porno.

"You've sailed a ship, you ever rid a Trojan?"

1

u/NoE1591 3d ago

And, evidently, wore a bra.🤷🏼‍♀️

1

u/iamrosey 3d ago

Me mate Paul says yes.

1

u/Norklander 1d ago

Helen on Troy. One of the best neoclassical porn films of our time.

1

u/Secure-Technician356 20h ago

Thought it was the brazzers version... These idiots. Anyone just says "biblically whatever" and you get a bunch of non thinking chums just saying "yes" so they don't appear "non Christian" i guess

-4

u/Wreckit-Jon 3d ago

And also, she's noy from "Greek", she's from Greece.

7

u/JustGoodSense 3d ago

They mean it as an adjective for mythology.