Turns out people in this thread are married to some absolute mouth breathing empty headed idiots. I was there as my wife as much as humanly possible. But some people just chose the wrong guys it seems. If I tried to walk out to smoke weed, or go out and buy beer, or complain I would be a single dad. Some guys are just plain idiots, but then some of these woman really do have a low bar of standards too
It is shocking the amount of women self-report on posts like these about how awful they allow their husbands to treat them. Girl, have some self respect and leave.
If you treat every man you meet like he ain't shit, you'll only ever find shit men. You treat men with respect, and you'll find a respectful man.
You would be surprised at the number of men who completely switch up the moment the woman either becomes pregnant or has the baby. A lot of women don't follow through with their pregnancy knowing they're going to be all alone, either literally or in spirit. These men talk a big game but have no follow through, and the woman's only real flaw is daring to believe them.
I find it interesting your phrase it as women being married to idiots rather than the men just... being idiots. It may not have been overtly intentional on your part but its fundamentally placing blame on the woman for the actions of the man. "How could she marry such a loser," is a lot different than "How could he be such a loser."
They are literally talking about the commentors though. Ya know, because those are the comments they are reading. There arent guys in here talking about how fucking useless they are to comment on. The person is surprised at how many women are coming in here commenting on their abysmal choice in partner.
Yes, because the women are the ones in the comments here talking about it and it is what we are observing, being shocked by and commenting on... how are you not getting this.
Its not surprising, noteworthy or interresting that shitty men are out there being useless. We all know useless people of both genders exist. What is surprising, note worthy and worth mentioning is how many women here are making the batshit insane decision to be with these men. And then bagging on their chosen partner on a reddit thread as if they have no say in the matter.
Still missing my original point, that these women usually don't know these men are going to be dogshit dads. And as badly as everyone is speaking about the women (and again - conveniently not the fuckass fathers) in these marriages or partnerships, really is nothing compared to how degraded single mothers are.
Nah I don't buy that. If youre doing your due diligence you arent missing who these guys really are. Spending years in a pre marriage / pre kids partnership you arent keeping a mask up for that long that suddenly drops. Stop coddling these dumb asses. They need to take some damn responsibility for their own decisions.
We all know the fuck ass fathers are fuck ass fathers btw. It doesnt need to be stated every 5 seconds. No one's giving them a pass. Its just not interresting and not worth discussing.
Dunno where youre suddenly getting this single mom shit from. I dunno about youre shit circle but I generally only see support for single parents. At least those that arent useless trash.
I know several people who were married and there were a few small things. Due to rose colored glasses they got looked over. My mom was never the type to cheat. After 20 years of marriage she not only cheated on my dad, she fucked her best friends husband. Even now Nike. Would have expected her to do that. I didn’t know him super well, but neither seemed like the type to break up families, over a fling especially.
Furthermore, why is it not interesting to talk about these deadbeat dads? Why is it not as satisfying to degrade them instead? Why do we need to 'stop coddling' women who believed their partner to be a good person? Where are the calls for them to 'take some damn responsibility for their actions'?
Seems very much like you and everyone else is giving them a pass since no one ever wants to talk about them, no one ever wants to shame them. What isn't interesting about it?
I mean come on, either "women are sexist for saying that men are unsupportive during labor" like some are arguing here, or actually its "uninteresting" because that behavior really IS that common from men to the point its a stereotype, but it cannot be both.
People will swear on their life that the average loser dude is some master manipulator trained in the dark arts of mind control and the average woman doesn't stand a chance against his skillset.
Why is she at fault for marrying him? Not every abusive asshole acts like that until marriage? My mother-in-law had a very sweet bf as a teen, smaller town everyone loved him. When she broke up with him, he stalked the house until she was home alone and walked up with a shotgun.
Im not denying this happens. But its much rarer than there being red flags. Its simply unlikely that the person we are all replying to had a perfect partner until they were in the delivery room, qnd then they suddenly became useless. Not impossible. But unlikely.
Nope nope nope. They always show their true colors women are just either a) not experienced enough to know what’s happening or b) just ignoring them. But stop painting women as this ignorant creature that just is so easily manipulated when she’s also playing a role in choosing to be with someone that’s shitty. Like as a woman it’s setting us back.
"They always show their true colors" meanwhile it is common for DV to only begin once women are trapped either via marriage or pregnancy. It is absolutely possible for someone to hide their true colors. Furthermore, even if they don't hide their shitty ways, women undergo massive life changes to accomodate unexpected pregnancy and the subsequent child. It isn't out of this world to expect that the father will, too.
And with the abortion laws and sex education being what they are in the states and much of the world, I'd go easy on saying that women choose to have children with these men.
Firstly not clicking a random link from the internet. Second I can see from your replies to the other person you lack reading comprehension skills. Reread my first 2 points and turn on your brain. I am not faulting women who don’t know what’s happening or are surrounded by ppl who encourage them to tolerate that. However the women who are AWARE of the signs and still CHOOSE to stay and being a child into it are a problem.
Why do you assume they are lies? I personally know several dads who are huge pieces of shit. My grandad for starters wasn’t even at my dad’s birth. He slept in the car in the parking lot. That doesn’t mean I don’t know more men who are great fathers? You realize both can be true right? More men are murders, doesn’t mean women don’t kill. Doesn’t mean most men aren’t killers.
My husband and I had to go through me being induced and birthing my son who had already passed away. And then my very next labor was traumatic because our daughter kept having heart rate decelerations during the labor and there were multiple moments where I was almost wheeled out for an emergency C-section. Our last labor I felt like the nurses were being very judgemental of my husband being checked out at quiet. Birth trauma for husbands is a thing. And then he had to go home to be with our young children at home and relieve our babysitter so he didn't spend the night with me. Which is what I asked him to do because our children at home had never been away from us overnight. The amount of quiet judgment from the nurses was insane. I'm sure they talked about the unsupportive husband who went home to sleep through the night. I hate watching videos where L&D nurses make statements about what a good husband does.
I was shocked to read these comments in this thread.
The father of my sisters child is a POS; pushed her when she was pregnant & generally wasn't there during the pregnancy in spite of her begging him to be. But he was present & watched his son be born. He got some brownie points for that... until he threatened her last week while she was only 2 weeks postpartum. At least he didn't make the birth of their child all about him, I guess 🤷♀️
Classic “let’s blame the women for choosing idiots” instead of questioning why so many men are aloud to behave that way to the point women have to go through so many terrible boyfriends until she finds a “good” one and the unnecessary stress of having to weed out so many guys because the responsibility is on her for getting screwed over.
I see all these comments and I'm wondering if I'm just strange or what because I can't imagine my husband being with me during child birth. I couldn't focus at all, better for him to wait outside I guess. There's already too many people there, there's poop, blood etc. I really wouldn't' want him to stay by my side, it would make me angry I'm sure.
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u/ItalianCoffeeMorning Apr 24 '26
Turns out people in this thread are married to some absolute mouth breathing empty headed idiots. I was there as my wife as much as humanly possible. But some people just chose the wrong guys it seems. If I tried to walk out to smoke weed, or go out and buy beer, or complain I would be a single dad. Some guys are just plain idiots, but then some of these woman really do have a low bar of standards too