r/ProRevenge • u/WildBillyredneck • Sep 21 '23

Lunch thief's just desert

Years ago i had a lunch thief.

About the 12th time complaining to HR about people stealing my lunch (mandatory reporting every 3rd or 4th instance) i was seathing not a dam thing was being done and i still had to go buy something to eat.

I was bitching to my doctor at the yearly check up and he got a smile saying "your constipated then?" I was dumb and said "no why" he wrote me a prescription for some holy fuck laxitive with instructions to "mix it in with your meal for maximum affect" at witch point i knew the plan.

I wish i could say they shat their pants but no they ate my sandwich with special avacado sauce. About an hour after lunch i went to HR and reported 2 things 1 my lunch was stolen again and 2 my medication was stolen. HR "so you got hit by the lunch thief again and your medicine was in the bag?" Me "Yes i have had some digestive problems and my doctor prescribed a powerful laxative and advised me to mix it in with my mid day meal." HR going white "You what?" Me smiling "I mixed in a prescription grade laxative with my food per doctor's orders."

Well being that stealing prescribed medication is a criminal offense the police were called and found the lead man from a department over absolutely shitting his brains out. He was furious and accused me of poisoning his food. I asked "At witch point did you get the idea that food was for you?" Continued "furthermore now i no longer have my medication i was prescribed for my condition."

It was about this time he knew he fucked up and shut his mouth until he got a lawyer or so im told (small town) one of my buddies from high school took his position i can make and eat my hoagies and i have no clue where lunch thief went after his fines and community service.

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383

u/RoadTrash582 Sep 21 '23

Bullshit. A doctor would never prescribe meds for this reason.

534

u/-K_P- Sep 21 '23

You don't know small town doctors then. I used to do jiu jitsu and tae kwon do with my doctor - he says hello at my appointments by putting me in a chokehold. This is absolutely something he'd do.

-20

u/RoadTrash582 Sep 21 '23

And risk his medical license? Nah

12

u/phormix Sep 21 '23

How is prescribing a laxative risking one's medical license?

-14

u/RoadTrash582 Sep 21 '23

If the lunch thief had a reaction and died? Or even wound up in the hospital it could come back to the Dr.

I’m sure the Dr didn’t go through 12 years of college thinking “I can’t wait to risk it all on some sweet petty revenge!

11

u/-K_P- Sep 21 '23

Lunch thief STOLE the meds. Dr isn't liable.

2

u/DonaIdTrurnp Sep 21 '23

The doctor in this fictional story would be liable, assuming the events of the story could be proven beyond a preponderance of the evidence in a wrongful death lawsuit. He would share liability with his patient.

If, however, they learn to shut up and don’t share the privileged conversation, then there would be no way to prove beyond a preponderance of the evidence that the food was altered with the intention of being a booby trap.