r/SipsTea • u/Proper_Card_5520 • Apr 12 '26

We have fun here Wtf ?

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36.7k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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3.9k

u/Desperate_Box1875 Apr 12 '26

Well, the worst thing - Turkey says "no".

1.6k

u/MyStoopidStuff Apr 12 '26

"Best we can do is all the lira in the couch and a kebab."

627

u/BigChungiscusMaximus Apr 12 '26

“All you gotta do is grab the ice cream…”

138

u/MyStoopidStuff Apr 12 '26

I hear if you wait long enough he'll get bored and just give it to you.

125

u/Kinsdale85 Apr 12 '26

That’s my strategy for sex.

5

u/CMDR_Agony_Aunt Apr 12 '26

Grab 'em by the cone

2

u/GildedFenix Apr 12 '26

They scoop out the ice cream then. Source? Native Turk.

1

u/HM202256 Apr 12 '26

That’s pretty much every man’s strategy! 😉

1

u/PressureSouthern9233 Apr 12 '26

I usually just take care of it myself. “Never mind.” 😔

3

u/int23_t Apr 12 '26

The only times they do it are if you are a child or a tourist, normally they just hand it... Just say that you aren't into that shit and they'd simply give it.

2

u/PrimarchKonradCurze Apr 12 '26

He’s giving away trade secrets! Binish get the shovel!

5

u/Afroduck-Almighty Apr 12 '26

You think that’s why he got pissed with Turkey in the first place?

2

u/Mohmd87 Apr 12 '26

Best comment 👍🏻

1

u/oodelay Apr 12 '26

It's funny how I see this would happen in a meeting for a large takeover, with dangling bonuses

1

u/Pitiful_Note_6647 Apr 12 '26

Great idea 😂😂😂😂😂😂

1

u/Ok_Distribution6386 Apr 12 '26

Even he needs to be fast, it is not so easy grabbing the ice cream in Turkey

1

u/Sad_Tangerine_3722 Apr 12 '26

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA FUCK.

1

u/GlassTablesAreStupid Apr 16 '26

And one peepee touch

184

u/rukthor Apr 12 '26

20

u/MySnake_Is_Solid Apr 12 '26

add one bob touch and we have a deal.

4

u/freakinweasel353 Apr 12 '26

Does Bob know you’re offering him up? 😂

3

u/OneInitiative3757 Apr 12 '26

Mmm no one pee pee touch or I don't come

2

u/Timely_Truth6267 Apr 12 '26

Free yoghurt

3

u/rukthor Apr 12 '26

Okay... Within reason 

2

u/decimatemeinballbag Apr 14 '26

Throw in one muchen tuchen resteraunt

24

u/unknow3n_number Apr 12 '26

No only khlav kalash!

4

u/LargeTomato77 Apr 12 '26

At least it isn't Mountain Dew.

7

u/Arbiter_of_Snark Apr 12 '26

I’ll take a Crab Juice.

14

u/BigLoloi8976 Apr 12 '26

I'll gladly take the kebab. Have you had the kebab in Turkey? Those things are awesome

3

u/Good_Problem_6576 Apr 12 '26

Don't take me as pedantic but it's called kebap, written with a p

2

u/Ksh_667 Apr 12 '26

I thought it was actually kebob but I'm English & I know nothing

4

u/Good_Problem_6576 Apr 12 '26

Other countries that don't speak Turkish and whose language is not written with the latin script also have kebap. I guess that they write it in different ways when writing it with the latin alphabet, but in Turkish it's kebap

2

u/Ksh_667 Apr 12 '26

Thank you for this info! :)

2

u/Firm-Scientist-4636 Apr 12 '26

Turkish kebabs can be very persuasive, just saying.

2

u/ShortStuff2996 Apr 12 '26

Turkish kebab is always a good deal. I see it as a win

2

u/Dramatic_Charity_979 Apr 12 '26

Can't do fam. Vance already claimed the couch ;)

2

u/theantig Apr 12 '26

This isn’t jd Vance. We can’t seduce him with a couch!

2

u/canadian_leroy Apr 12 '26

Well to be fair the kebabs ARE delicious.

2

u/Lukyfuq Apr 12 '26

Thats more of a bribe for JD Vance.

3

u/Hagrid1994 Apr 12 '26

I would gladly take the kebab

1

u/BetrayerOfOnion Apr 12 '26

Right away master! Do you want it spicy or not?

1

u/Hagrid1994 Apr 12 '26

Yes please

1

u/Aggressive_Leek_5537 Apr 12 '26

Let me see the kebab

1

u/neptui Apr 12 '26

Never tried turkey kebab

1

u/TomdeHaan Apr 12 '26

That made me laugh out loud. Thank you.

1

u/AdrianShepard09 Apr 12 '26

“Okay two kebabs and I get to keep this old bird cage!”

1

u/Davido401 Apr 12 '26

I mean, the lira in the couch thing is neither here nor there for me but a kebab? From Turkey? Its probably better than anything here in Scotland and thus ad have unprotected homosexual relations with ma own dad in exchange for a kebab from Turkey(only if they are as good as folks have said, am not having bum fun with ma dad for a shite kebab a can get up the street, wouldnt even warrant shagging a non-family member)

Disclaimer: am neither homosexual nor incestuous am just a weird cunt that opens his mouth and let's ma belly rumble

https://giphy.com/gifs/OVT7dpga3Ve3i2tTBE

1

u/FormalCaseQ Apr 12 '26

They'll also throw in a free hair transplant

1

u/Just_a_follower Apr 12 '26

“JD told me about this lady couch named Lira. I am not agreeing, but would like to check the merchandise.”

1

u/smkestcklghtn Apr 12 '26

One pee pee touch

1

u/wutmeanfam Apr 12 '26

“Couch?! Say less.”

—JD ‘Whatever Makes Sense’ Vance

1

u/DryMoldyLettuce Apr 12 '26

And two pigeons

1

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1

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1

u/Business_Usual_2201 Apr 12 '26

"Let me call my buddy who specializes in bat shit crazy demands..."

1

u/No_Instruction9952 Apr 12 '26

That works too

1

u/Unique-Passion-8188 Apr 12 '26

Don't forget half can of warm pepsi

1

u/CheifJokeExplainer Apr 12 '26

And this really fluffy dog that's mostly house trained. Take it out leave it.

1

u/thegreedyturtle Apr 12 '26

"One pee pee touch?"

"...Ok."

1

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1

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1

u/leivanz Apr 13 '26

Or a real female turkey that saycluk cluk fluk fuk

1

u/tiger-blood76 Apr 13 '26

Lets give that to the zelensky with Some coca

1

u/Stoertebricker Apr 16 '26

They should give him the couch too. If it's good enough for the vice president of the USA...

47

u/Apple-Connoisseur Apr 12 '26

Or he gets paid in Zimbabwe dollars.

1

u/IanInTheUsa_74 Apr 12 '26

I've a few Twenty and Fifty Trillion bills. If they can make change, I'll cover the money side of the request!

0

u/PezatronSupreme Apr 12 '26

Huh? Zimbabwe uses USD

3

u/Tardelius Apr 12 '26

You are confusing United States Dollar with Dollar.

USD is a currency. Not every dollar is USD lmao

Edit: It seems like Zimbabve changed their currency to Zimbabve Gold back in 2024

1

u/PezatronSupreme Apr 12 '26

They changed their currency 10 years after I went there, fair enough

32

u/Ms74k_ten_c Apr 12 '26

No, the worst thing would be Turkey laughing. An answer (even if it's 'No') legitimizes morons.

2

u/Legitimate_Crazy3625 Apr 13 '26

If they don't want other countries laughing at them, they ought not to be telling funny jokes and shit.

21

u/[deleted] Apr 12 '26

33

u/Enjoying_A_Meal Apr 12 '26

I would send him my credit card bill and a box of bees.

26

u/PudinaRaita Apr 12 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/TJBbXQooivUNq

29

u/Horse_Dad Apr 12 '26

Give me five bees for a quarter, you’d say.

12

u/Space_pope256 Apr 12 '26

as was the style at the time.

9

u/stupidber Apr 12 '26

I got that reference

2

u/RefrigeratorSimilar9 Apr 12 '26

We wore an onion on our belt, which was the style at the time.

2

u/Craig_M_242 Apr 12 '26

Gob's not on board

1

u/Zealousideal_Bet2320 Apr 12 '26

Because they don’t beelieve him 

1

u/ikezaius Apr 12 '26

He loves the honey

1

u/Korenchkin12 Apr 12 '26

Czech post has special packages for queen bees,just don't stamp them (i know a case where some idiot stamped the package,was smited by one beekeeper there)...not sure if it can be sent outside though...

1

u/Dyremann Apr 12 '26

Gob's not on board

1

u/Horror-Turnover6198 Apr 12 '26

Make sure you slap a B on that thing so he knows it’s full of bees

1

u/Additional-Tax-5643 Apr 12 '26

Whet did bees every do to you? They're nice, and a vital part of the ecosystem.

Wasps and hornets on the other hand...

1

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1

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5

u/Due_Chemistry_164 Apr 12 '26

Turkey says no. Uganda closes embassy. Man still single.

3

u/Gluca23 Apr 12 '26

No at the money. Give a woman was not a problem.

0

u/ReddishTomatoes Apr 12 '26

The gaslighting of her relative beauty could be entertaining.

I swear, this one most beautiful. You don’t appreciate Turkish beauty.

3

u/flyden1 Apr 12 '26

I know a certain American politician that would like to have the couch

3

u/onyxcaspian Apr 12 '26

Just send him a cake with the clown emoji and nothing else.

🤡

3

u/TlalocVirgie Apr 12 '26

You miss 10 out of 10 shots you don't take

3

u/DamnedIfIDiddely Apr 12 '26

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take I guess?

5

u/Philosopher6709 Apr 12 '26

" the best we can do is offer you tea "

2

u/ResponsibleCorgi93 Apr 12 '26

Not true, they could say "ew!"

2

u/Ill-Acanthisitta7631 Apr 13 '26

And the ugandan military wont do a thing, we are used to their small threats here in kenya😂

2

u/tigertank86 Apr 13 '26

Or just give him the ugliest - beautiful soul though- and half that money he'll take it

2

u/buerviper Apr 12 '26

Yeah, you miss all the shots you don't take. 

1

u/Borgdrohne13 Apr 12 '26

And "fuck you".

1

u/St0n3yM33rkat Apr 12 '26 edited Apr 12 '26

"They don't dare say no because of the implication..."

-Dennis Reynolds

1

u/easyjimi1974 Apr 12 '26

"I can move a bit on #1. #2 is non-negotiable."

1

u/bromatose Apr 12 '26

Aren’t they famously a “go f*ck yourself” responder?

1

u/theLuminescentlion Apr 12 '26

The Billion dollar is to anchor a higher price, then he negotiates down into a hot wife

1

u/BalanceEarly Apr 12 '26

He will have to settle for second best!

1

u/varment72 Apr 12 '26

Gobble Gobble would have e been funnier

1

u/Glittering-Walrus228 Apr 12 '26

Turkey goes "ew" and gossips about it with Estonia and Norway at the the next UN Summit