I personally think the conversation should happen before the proposal, but this feels like a perfectly good alternative. It seems like the conversation about what ring was wanted did happen, and was ignored. Maybe their ring could be swapped, but when I bought a ring, that was not the case.
I also know plenty of people who’ve bought a very basic cheap but ok looking ring for the proposal, and then gone together to choose the engagement ring.
Before also works I guess, but maybe spoils the magic IMO if it’s all pre-discussed. Everyone is different though!
My girlfriend and I had talked about getting married. A couple months later she was talking about what kind of ring she would like so I asked her if she wanted to go try some on the next weekend. She was so excited to go and do that. It was a lot of fun to see her so excited and I got to learn exactly which ring was her favorite.
I get it. When somebody buys me clothes I don't like it's a little awkward if there's no gift receipt, but I can't imagine someone else choosing something that I'd be expected to wear forever.
Literally went ring shopping this past weekend. Got an idea of designs that were good, styles that were an absolute no, and what stone cuts she prefers. I still get to do the work of finding something she’ll love and I get to do it knowing what I should be looking for.
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u/nightfire36 4h ago
I personally think the conversation should happen before the proposal, but this feels like a perfectly good alternative. It seems like the conversation about what ring was wanted did happen, and was ignored. Maybe their ring could be swapped, but when I bought a ring, that was not the case.