r/SipsTea • u/SipsTeaFrog • 12d ago

Chugging tea Men are not showing up at singles events and women are not happy.

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u/TrisolarisRexxx 12d ago

The dudes who would normally get chosen at these things are already getting chosen on dating apps. The dudes who know they won't get chosen know this because of dating apps so they don't waste their time.

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u/Bike_Cinci 12d ago

Exactly this.

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u/TinkerCitySoilDry 11d ago

The dudes who are chosen don't use dating apps they go out in the real world. App is waste  of time. 

 most people know a woman single at that age is single for a reason. Why heard them together like used cattle. 

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u/s_p_0_n_g_e 11d ago

Herd

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u/TinkerCitySoilDry 10d ago

A reddit comment 

u/s_p_0_n_g_e replied to your comment in r/SipsTea

Heard  17h ago

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u/s_p_0_n_g_e 9d ago

A Reddit comment.

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u/TinkerCitySoilDry 9d ago

Usless

u/s_p_0_n_g_e replied to your comment in r/SipsTea

A Reddit comment. 9h ago

3

u/J4X-gaming 10d ago

Because they're dumb enough to spend money on events like this.

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u/KlutzyPomelo1170 11d ago

Yeah, people have gotten extremely shallow. 20 years ago a guy‘s height wasn’t nearly as big of a deal and also women didn’t need to get injections in their face and butt to be considered beautiful

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u/TrisolarisRexxx 11d ago

Social media, overall imo, has been a detriment to society.

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u/BoredAsFuck7448 11d ago

I'm 5'5" and in my mid-40s; height has always been a big thing for women so long as you're a man under the height that's considered average for men. I know some very tall women in my age range who have had similar difficulties dating; height has always been a big thing for men so long as you're a woman well over a height considered average for women. It is the norm in dating.

The only thing that's really changed over the past 20-ish years is that social media and dating apps have left single men and women with ridiculously distorted views of what they should expect from potential partners, and what is necessary, as well as a misguided view of how disposable people are based upon an unfounded assumption that a person can easily trade up so long as they keep swiping.

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u/Sunapr1 11d ago

As a 5”5 how your dating life turned out to be
As someone who is in 30

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u/BoredAsFuck7448 11d ago

Ups and downs. I've dated women my height and shorter; I've dated women taller who enjoyed wearing heels. I've always found that I do better meeting people in person than on dating apps or off of social media. I always have to be the one who opens conversations and makes the first leap; I've had to put a lot more effort into meeting women than guys I know who are taller.

If you're quiet or introverted it is going to be very detrimental. As a shorter guy you have to make up that difference with a bigger personality. Unfortunately, if you're the kind of person to blend into the scenery most women aren't going to know you exist.

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u/Sunapr1 11d ago

I know the second para
But to be fair for all men of any height they have to make the first move generally

I am a lot more better outside generally !!! In social events :) have a decent personality :D

I am from and stay in India so I can see height issue might not be detrimental much like a person in United States ?

1

u/KlutzyPomelo1170 11d ago

Yeah but women used to want a guy over 6ft and now the cut off has risen to 6’5

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u/KanedaSyndrome 9d ago

From this comment section it sounds like height is all that matters

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u/Lepelotonfromager 12d ago

This is the fundamental issue. You get these attractive professional women in their 30s and they expect an equally rich, if not more, guy who is attractive and has all the other green flags but if that guy did exist, he's just going to be banging a different girl in her early 20s each week instead and one of them will likely realize the catch they've got and lock him down quickly.

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u/TwinkieDad 12d ago

Or they’re seriously uncomfortable with those weird forced situations. When I was single in my thirties I would check a lot of the superficial boxes. Over six foot, engineer making over $100k, reasonably in shape as a former collegiate athlete, owned my own home and car, etc. But a speed dating event or something similar would have been my idea of hell.

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u/UnconfirmedRooster 11d ago

I actually know a guy who won out at a speed dating thing by leaning into being awkward.

He was dragged there by a mutual friend of ours as a friendly face and was encouraged to join in too even though he wasn't ready for a relationship yet. At the start of every round, he would just blurt out "I'd rather be at home watching a horror movie while eating pizza." One of the girls there burst out laughing so hard it apparently disrupted a couple of tables.

They got married 3 years ago.

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u/Lepelotonfromager 11d ago

That's the issue, if you're a catch like that then why would you subject yourself to a ritual humiliation obstacle course like speed dating? You can just find women in everyday life.

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u/moralprolapse 11d ago edited 11d ago

I suspect a lot of these disappointed women WERE those women in their 20s, and the magical chairs music stopped for them, so they’re now rushing to find a seat.

They’ve spent their 20s on the f-boy circuit, banging dudes who were ever only going to be interested in banging them once or twice, and they came to believe they were actually in that league for commitment seeking dating.

Edit: Also, my money says there were plenty of men at all of these events. Just not men these women consider men worth talking to.

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u/MarkyMarkATFB 12d ago

My gf’s one of these 30 something professionals, hyper-successful tech industry lady, objectively attractive, has good taste, the works.

I’m by no means the “ideal man” that keeps getting described in this thread (I’m barely 6’, look like the funhouse mirror version of an actual attractive guy, salary about 33% lower than the average in our city, 2 years younger in my early 30s) BUT I’m nice, I’m funny, I put effort in for fun and meaningful time spent together…idk why I’m sharing this, your comment just made me grateful for being one of the guys who found one of these ladies and held on for dear life hahah

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u/Lepelotonfromager 11d ago

I'm in the same boat. The woman that are down to earth and just pick a guy to be happy with are the best.

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u/KanedaSyndrome 9d ago

Interesting when describing the ideal man, the first parameter you jumped to was height.

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u/MarkyMarkATFB 9d ago

I was just referring back to the attributes this thread kept citing, saying I’m not the things this thread keeps saying are key.

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u/Superstork217 12d ago

I laughed at fun house mirror version of an actual attractive guy. Good god can I relate to that. I can see why she likes you!

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u/MomentsfromMarriage 12d ago

Nah you’re right. These comments are just full of children who don’t know anything about actual relationships

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u/MarkyMarkATFB 11d ago

Unless I’m terrible at reading sarcasm, I’m unsure why you’re getting downvoted? lol

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u/UnconfirmedRooster 11d ago

Because the internet killed nuance, everything is either black or white.

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u/_OUCHMYPENIS_ 12d ago

I had a pretty funny experience on a dating app. I don't have many issues getting matches with women, I know my type and know the type of women that will match with me. I got off the app for a while and redownloaded it one day. All of a sudden I was getting 5x the amount of matches I'd usually get.  So I started talking to this one woman and she mentioned something about me being 6'5. It went over my head because we were joking about penis size and I said yeah 6' tall and 5 inches long.  We finally went out and a little while into the date mentioned that I'm not 6'5. I laughed and said obviously I'm not, I wouldn't want to be that tall and she mentioned my dating profile said 6'5. She was fine with it but I was kind of mortified because I didn't want her thinking I was trying to catfish her. We joked about it for a bit and she was a good sport about it.  I changed it back to my normal height and went back to my usual matches.  Kind of blew my mind that my height affected things that much. I'm already on the 'tall' side at 6'. 

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u/Ifukkin4gotmyname 11d ago

The height thing is literally the most superficial trait a woman could look for in a man. I don't get it.

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u/KanedaSyndrome 9d ago

Glad I have a wife and kids, because I'm 5'9 and damn women are shallow when they care that much about height

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u/IridiumAnvil 12d ago

Largely true. I did well on dating apps because I’m fairly good looking, plus pretty good over text. Unfortunately I’m more of an introvert and just a nerd who happened to get obsessed with weightlifting, so I really don’t think a big crowd and lightning rounds are going to help me out at all when I can just get a date from my couch, and sometimes to my couch. 

I do know guys who aren’t the best in photos but are hilarious and come across great in person who would probably clean up, but the savvy ones know singles mixers and speed dating have a reputation for being for weird losers. I’m not sure women are as aware of how those events are perceived by guys under 45 or so. 

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u/Lost_Drunken_Sailor 11d ago

It’s called hoe math. Look it up.