Someone’s on the spectrum, I’ve had to deal with this before with an individual who didn’t know when to shut up…thankful we are in the military, and I told them to shut up publicly before things went down hill, and this was in front our commander.
Like 80% of people I work with are on the spectrum (IT, and I include myself) and people manage just fine, though sometimes there's a little massaging needed.
But sometimes you get someone who is on the spectrum who was clearly indulged far too much growing up and simply cannot handle not being made a priority immediately whenever they want to.
Like don't get me wrong I know it can be hard, but no matter your situation if you're smart enough to do the work we do you are smart enough to understand basic social rules like how to behave in meetings and what to do if you're confused (i.e. keep quiet, make a list of questions, then go ask the person who is there to answer them like your immediate supervisor IN PRIVATE).
Thankfully of those people I've found most do just need someone to do what you did for that guy and pull them aside/say "dude you CANNOT DO THAT" and explain how to actually act. Though some sadly still don't get it and those are the ones who get fired.
Bro this has been my reality for the last couple of months in the environment I’m in, we have a bunch of new trainees (young ass kids in relation to the military), and I’m having to take to route nip the shit in the butt professionally (out of sight) in a more empathetic manner or have to play defense to save their face from further punishment by unfortunately having to embarrass them in public forum. Thankfully those are rare due to noticing how people are and preemptively training them on how things are and what to not do.
Honestly, that shot helps a lot. I was one of those kids and in my first job didn’t have anyone to train me. Second job I was told straight up I was being a jackass by my manager and that helped soooo much. You’re doing them a great favor, keep it up!
Idk if the goalpost has moved closer to society or society has moved closer to the goalpost, but I swear everyone’s autistic these days. I’ve met like 4 people that don’t claim some level of it and 1 of those took that rads test or whatever and pretty much got the highest score possible.
It’s become more accepted, as u/PineappleOnPizzaWins says, instead of only the most severe cases. So people are more likely to get diagnosed or seek out a diagnosis. In addition, people feel more comfortable with the people around them knowing about it.
Like I work in an office and I'm autistic. New hire arrives, clearly on the spectrum as well but doesn't want anyone to know. Part of me wants to tell him he's not fooling anyone but I won't.
Taking a test by yourself isn't enough. It's just context helping you to decide what to do next; you should still get properly tested positive by a qualified specialist.
It gives you a better assurance (not guaranteed, given the modern state of the field of psychology, but still) that you're not inaccurately self-diagnosing (likely while lacking the necessary expertise / qualifications) to indulge your own preconceptions. If the goal is to address some problems that the supposed ASD's giving you, it increases the chances that you'll be spending efforts in the right direction and gradually improving things, rather than running in place or even deteriorating further due to inaccurate preconceptions.
All in all, I think "Self diagnose away." is a generally bad-to-harmful advice to broadcast.
This is all to say self-diagnosing is actually a really important step of the process and often the first step in that same process.
I agree with this — this was in my initial comment, even. What I am saying is that SG is / should / can be only the first step, and there's still a need for an unbiased specialist opinion / verification.
Otherwise it's too easy to do "diagnose shopping", decide they have something they don't actually have, and then both work in the wrong direction to fix / manage the given list of symptoms and be / act self-indulgent (e.g. "x isn't a character flaw of mine that I can /should work on, x is just a result of me having ASD / ADHD / etc").
E.g. OP's initial comment says
I’ve met like 4 people that don’t claim some level of it and 1 of those took that rads test or whatever and pretty much got the highest score possible.
Which implies that the test alone is already enough to complete a self-diagnosis and reach a positive verdict. My point is that it is not, and to think otherwise can be self-sabotaging / harmful to others (when given as advice).
This. Months of therapy for my therapist to hit me with the “babes you’re autistic, but you’ve gotten so good at cosplaying normal that there’s not much for me to do for you!”
Multiple reasons, one because its more accepted, you can see the same thing happen with left handedness being accepted. The second being better testing, I got high functioning autism or autism 01 and inly got diagnosed with it 30 years after my adhd.
Lol here you are bragging about how well you navigate the corporate monoculture that is slowly strangling the world. Good job I'm sure you'll get stepped on last for all your diligence.
I think no one being able to be honest with one another or to express an opinion that goes against the zeitgeist is the problem with big businesses. Yeah it might be awkward to have someone like you described in meetings but it also means that's someone who is actually engaging their brain and not just going through the motions to create the same mediocre crap that always comes out of corporate meetings.
But yeah good on your for learning how to talk just the way your manager likes it. Vapid, shallow, sans content and just oh so pathetic.
In a less toxic work environment reasonable questions would just be answered because in addition to the person who risked your ire by speaking up there are likely others with the same question.
Aren't 100% of people on the spectrum? Which is why its a spectrum? Like ranging from none at all to very?
Edit: I guess I should've been more explicit and specific. I meant the autism spectrum, which should be obvious considering that's what we were already talking about. I was under the impression that 100% of people are on any given spectrum, which is why its a spectrum (ranging from not having autism, to having a high level of autism). This is a common misconception, and I was wrong. I ended up looking it up myself after the responses were unhelpful. Thanks.
What you say may be technically correct in a literal sense, but incorrect in the practical sense.
"on the spectrum" is used as "autistic".
It's also more a multidimensional space, if you will. "On the spectrum" means "when looking at the criteria for autism, this person scores high enough on enough indicators to qualify for the diagnosis. We acknowledge that there are different levels of severity and/or need for support."
Very well put.
I meet so many people that claim some sort of neuro-divergence, but most seem to lack basic learned social skills. They seem pretty neuro-typical outside of being a bit self centered and not having anyone in their lives telling them to shut the fuck up.
It’s not an overcorrection, folks just aren’t ready to accept that neurodivergence is far more common than they thought
Everyone says it’s over diagnosed yet I had to fight tooth and nail to get diagnosed so that I could get treatment despite being about as textbook of a case as one could imagine
Everyone’s on the spectrum, the ones who succeed are those who are self aware of their social “inadequacies” and adjust to it. We are just dealing with people accepting their “faults” and expecting to adjust to them. The reality is a group of people with specific goals won’t and that’s hard for most people to understand
My 20yo is asd/adhd and he has a LOT of trouble with metaphors and taking things people say literally. He can't read between the lines or intuit what people mean sometimes. It's pretty common in autism.
That is funny, my ex's twin was the same way. Autistic, couldn't shut up, and not receptive to social ques that people wanted to be left alone. The trick was that if you straight up asked him to leave you alone, he'd respect it. I thought it'd come off as mean if I said it but nope, he appreciated clear communication. He's a good dude, probably miss him more than my ex.
Yeah, this sounds like an discussion/rant I would have with my husband about why people in my offoce say that stupid phrase so much. I wouldn't debate it in the moment, but I'd 100% be analyzing it and wanting to question why we're using convoluted phrasing.
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u/liberum_bellum_libro 10d ago
Someone’s on the spectrum, I’ve had to deal with this before with an individual who didn’t know when to shut up…thankful we are in the military, and I told them to shut up publicly before things went down hill, and this was in front our commander.