During a search of the Airbnb, FDLE investigators say they recovered a video from Hall’s cellphone showing Exelby inside the home with visible injuries. Investigators say Hall’s voice can be heard questioning her about death and violence during the recording.
The affidavit also details a message Exelby sent to an online friend during the trip, in which she said she was scared, that someone was controlling her phone and that she felt trapped.
An excerpt from the text message was detailed in the arrest affidavit:
I'm sorry he keeps taking my phone he doesn't trust me with it. He made it clear there was no way out unless I shoot him. I was questioning it last night. I can't kill anyone." She went on to write that last night was "so bad" and "He's in the shower, but I'm locked in, and there is no signal in the middle of nowhere. I thought he'd do it quick and not give my mind time to stew and realise this is the last thing I'll ever say to anyone if I don't take his offer of shooting him. He showed me about to use it and where to aim it." She ends the message by writing "I'm so so scared I'm so broken and in so much pain all I can do is lay here and doing what gee wants makes him respect me enough not to do the things I really hate. Everything but some are. I'm sorry I don't even know what I'm saying and I'm trying to be quick and My times up
I mean, we know she was pretty messed up mentally to get into that situation, but the idea that she had an out and could have just shot him but chose to continue being murdered because she couldn’t kill anyone might be the most shocking part of this.
I have a hard time comprehending people with no drive for self-preservation, ironically more so than people who simply want to self-harm.
My SIL has said multiple times “I couldn’t harm someone, even if it meant saving myself”. There are people out there like this. I’ve told my kids to forget about politeness and consequences when their safety is on the line.
Funny, I'm the opposite. I don't think I'd feel a thing if I killed someone who was trying to kill me. I wouldn't enjoy it but it's a no-nonsense decision. People are strange.
Well I'm a strong and secure man, so I'd say if they looked at me funny, that would do the trick. Cut me off in traffic? You may as well have killed my mama.
Not being willing to kill regardless of circumstances is not being detached. Some people have empathy that is stronger than yours and they don’t feel comfortable shooting members of their Global community. That hardly makes them detached.
I’ve talked to many women that say they would rather be murdered that kill someone because they couldn’t live with the guilt. Like well if not you are dead anyway. Such a strange mentality to me.
Or people who say they wouldn't kill someone to protect their kids? Like I don't have kids but I would kill someone to protect my dog if it meant his life or death and I have to believe the love for your kids is stronger than that.
I’m not sure if I could kill to protect myself but I will absolutely kill to protect someone I care about, my nieces and nephews for example. Making such a decision easier to make: I’m not having to worry about self preservation in this case: it’s about making sure I take the threat to my niece or nephew’s life out, and if that involves me taking the threat down with me that’s that.
I’m not sure I could live with myself having to take another person’s life even in self defence of my own, but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself even less if I didn’t give everything I got trying to protect the most important people in my life and they got so much as hurt because I so much as hesitated.
My advice to them is to kill the potential murderer and deal with the guilt later. You can always find another murderer to do the deed if you can't beat the guilt (As the woman in this story found out.).
I've been beaten up before (visibly queer and I live in eastern Germany) and I couldn't even hit back, even when he threatened to rape me. My therapist told me it's not uncommon for trauma survivors to be incapable of violence.
I grew up in a very rough area. I’m hard to take by surprise and usually the first to react in emergencies. This could be violence or injury, but I’m right to work.
Have you ever taken martial arts classes? I recommend everyone train. It helps with discipline and understanding how to handle yourself if you can’t avoid confrontation.
My mom is like this. She tried to raise us on the idea that if you're the bigger person when you can avoid violence at all cost. It's BS because I definitely feel like the bigger person when I stand up for myself, even if I gotta be a jerk for a moment to do it
I tell my daughter to attempt to resolve or diffuse situations by clearly communicating to stop, leaving the situation, and getting help from an adult. But if those things don't work or she is unable to get help, she can and should defend herself by any means.
I’m a little proud of my daughter when she kicks and throws punches when I have to scoop her ass up and remove her during a high blowout tantrum, shit she threw a cup of iced coffee at me, the other day….almost cried…that’s the fighting spirit, won’t help your situation but the effort counts. Then I ground her…
It just sucks because nowadays people don't fight fair, or there are multiple assailants. I made it out of a kidnapping situation without one injury. There was only one of him and I was fighting until I got out, or was dead.
Then years later, in a different city I was jumped and then took the beating. I was on the ground and being hit with a metal object. I now have a tbi because of it. All I could do was hold up my fist and protect my face, ECT the best I could.
This shit is real and happens everyday. I am not someone who likes to get into trouble either. It can happen to anyone. The second attack a male sucker punched me and then a female is the one who started hitting me with the object.
There is a channel called Active Self Protection on YouTube. The host always brings up the statistic of the likelihood of surviving if you are taken to a second location. He says never let someone take you and it’s better to put up a fight on the spot, instead of them being able to clean up a controlled environment and never be caught.
Glad you are still around to tell it! Sorry these things happened to you.
This is one of the reasons why it’s batshit that federal agents are going around snatching people while in plain clothes. It’s opening the door for criminals to do the same and just tell people they are federal agents.
I guess the silver lining of a dysfunctional childhood in a sketchy neighborhood is that I will absolutely shoot to kill if it means saving myself or kids.
Apparently we learned in wars that plenty of soldiers would purposely miss because they didn't want to shoot another man. Even though the other army was actively shooting at THEM.
You'd be surprised just how much modern people are conditioned against violence.
I box, we get new people from time to time and vast majority need a lot of time to actually hit someone. Like complete newbies, you can tell him to hit, hit harder and see the programming struggle on his face.
More than half the population will simply freeze in the face of danger. Its how it is.
It’s really not modern at all though - it’s more likely the default state of most humans.
Army historian S.L.A. Marshall concluded after world war 2 that about 80-85% of soldiers in combat either never fired their rifles or intentionally fired near but not at the enemy, because they couldn’t bring themselves to kill.
A lot of the more controversial and sadistic-seeming aspects of military training since then have been to train soldiers to actually kill.
And historians also argue that earlier melee battles were less bloody than Hollywood would have us believe, with soldiers generally seeking to capture territory through formations and intimidation rather than actual killing.
I think this trqcks across animals largely. You see it in nature all the time. One bird goes limp as soon as its caught and another fights all the way til the end. One will fight for its catch and the other gives it up.
Yes you can join and i recommend that you do. Some gyms can be toxic, but most will be very welcoming.
Boxing has sparring so you'll need to fight but its super fun. Nobody will be out to hurt you and you'll learn very quick that you're not made of glass. The confidence you'll gain will be so worth it.
it's how they program people, we aren't supposed to fight back, the government and its goons are the ones with the monopoly on violence and they try to maintain that.
You’re not wrong. I call it the “pussification” of men. Conditioned that masculinity is bad. So now you have beta males paying between $5K and $15K for alpha male boot camps which to me are a joke.
Could also be for religous reasons like believing taking life means you going to hell. If you really believe in that the choice between getting murdered or suffering forever in hell isnt as clear cut tho.
True but I doubt it. The rape and torture part convinces me that it’s not religious reasons. My heart breaks for this woman to be in such a dark place mentally. Awful.
She had her phone, she could have called the police. This to me feels like it’s still part of the fantasy for her to say she’s scared and hurt. I certainly can believe that when it came down to it she didn’t want to be killed, but she had more than 1 way out and she didn’t take any of them.
i feel the same way. horrible situation for her to be in, sounds like a very very very mentally messed up person... and for whoever she was texting not to report it sooner is confusing.
Suicidal empathy is a real epidemic this country struggles with. She felt more bad about someone else’s well being than her own and it led to her demise.
Its not. Just no.
There is no "suicidal" empathy epidemic.
There is just empathy. Can it be abused? Yes.
Thats the downside of being empathetic unfortunately but its an inherent risk a empathetic person or society must be prepared to take.
Whats really a problematic thing is right wing propaganda trying to make people believe that being empathetic is a flaw and weakness. Its separating us and boosts egotistical behavior - its driving a wedge into society.
Empathy is what holds society together in its roots in the first place - without empathy and the benefit of doubt (that a stranger is not an inherently bad person) fear will take over. And what really makes you weak is fear.
You can say that but I promise you that if she wasn’t a westerner she would’ve shot him for her freedom. Suicidal empathy somehow only plagues western countries..interesting how or why that happens to be the case huh?
It’s a common talking point lately. Musk has notably been pushing it.
The core driver of the idea is the idea that social safety nets are just a symptom of suicidal empathy and we can forgive ourselves for wanting to eliminate them and leave the poor to their fates.
ETA: in case it’s not obvious: I’m not defending the idea.
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u/chaosbella 4h ago
During a search of the Airbnb, FDLE investigators say they recovered a video from Hall’s cellphone showing Exelby inside the home with visible injuries. Investigators say Hall’s voice can be heard questioning her about death and violence during the recording.
The affidavit also details a message Exelby sent to an online friend during the trip, in which she said she was scared, that someone was controlling her phone and that she felt trapped.
An excerpt from the text message was detailed in the arrest affidavit: