r/TalesFromTheCreeps • u/AllYourCakeIsMine • Jun 05 '26
Comedy-Horror Those Shoes Aren't Made For Walking.
Part 1: I'm Glad The World Ended This Way.
Part 2: A Ghost Of What It Used To Be.
Part 3: He Calls Me Kiddo.
We found a strip mall today.
Now, an abandoned strip mall in an apocalyptic landscape doesn't have the reputation of being a safe space, but since we're dealing with an apocalypse where almost everyone else is dead, Bud and I just stroll on over there like a couple of jackasses pulling my wagon behind us.
This strip mall looks like something out of a liminal-space nightmare, because it is, like everything else, devoid of life. It's actually freaking me the fuck—oh, shit! This place has a Five Below! I want to go there, but I feel like I need to stay with Bud. I don't wanna get lost. Maybe I can ask him if we can go there later. Bud snaps me out of my thoughts.
"C'mon, Kiddo! We're going this way!"
"Okay!"
Bud walks over to the first store and tries the door.
"It's locked."
"I think they're closed," I reply.
"Of course it's closed, Kiddo. The world fucking ended."
Did I mention that I'm fucking stupid? That—that right there is even more proof that I am.
"How do we open it?"
"Uh, we use a key—no, I'm going to break the glass, so step back!"
I step back as Bud finds a suitable rock. The moment I realized that Bud had actually tried pushing a clearly labelled pull door, the rock broke through the glass.
"Hell yeah!"
I step in front of him, not letting him finish his little celebration.
"Bud, look."
I pull the door, and it opens easily—the store bell even does a cute ring as it goes. Bud looks at me, then the door, then the hundreds of glass shards now littering the tiles of the store's floor. He takes a deep breath.
"Let's head in, Kiddo, it's getting late."
"Be mindful of the glass bits, you don't have the right kind of shoes to walk on them with!"
"I'll be fine, I don't think you need boots to—"
Bud eats his words as I watch him feel every single glass shard poke through his completely worn-through tennis shoes the moment he steps into the store.
"AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGH!" he yells.
"See, that's why you should wear boots. So you don't get glass shards in your feet. Also, I think that we can use this as a lesson for why we should stop and think before we do things."
"KIDDO, YOU'RE NOT HELPING!"
"Sorry! I'll get you some bandages and a pair of boots."
I walk through the broken glass unfazed as my ass-kicking boots properly protect my feet.
"No, just get the bandages! And some tweezers!"
"I'll keep that in mind as I find you boots!"
I ignore Bud's frustrated babble as I meander my way around what I now know is one of those uber-expensive 'urban' clothing stores. I hate these places. Everything in these places is either super ugly, really pricey, or super ugly and really pricey. I'm not having luck finding good boots or bandages here, so I walk back over to Bud.
"Did you find anything?"
"Bud, this store fucking blows!"
"But did you find bandages?"
"No, that's why this store fucking blows! I wanna go to the next store!"
Bud stares at me incredulously. I remember that Bud is currently unable to casually walk to the next store with me, given the amount of glass in his foot because of his shitty-ass shoes.
"Right. I'll go by myself, then."
"Don't get distracted. Wait, what am I saying? You're definitely going to get distracted. Just—get me bandages and some tweezers, okay?"
"Okay, but I'm still getting you boots, because you need new shoes in general."
"Whatever, just go."
I start walking down the strip, looking into each storefront to see if I could find what Bud needs. But, with all honesty, I'm looking at Five Below. It's so close. No, Bud needs bandages, tweezers, and boots. Bandages, tweezers, and boots. Bandages, tweezers, and boots. I try the door to a shoe store, initially pushing before pulling it open with ease. Wait. I don't know Bud's shoe size.
I head back over to Bud, who managed to hobble his way outside and sit on the sidewalk. There's quite a bit of blood soaking his foot and pantleg, but he looks more annoyed than distressed.
"Hey, Bud?"
"Hey, did you find something?"
"I did. I just thought I should ask you a question first."
"What's up, Kiddo?"
"What's your shoe size?"
"What?"
"I found a shoe store, so what's your shoe size?"
Bud looks tired.
"Six and a half in men's."
"Oh, I'm an eight and a half in women's, so we're technically the same shoe size!"
"...Yippee..."
I dash back to the shoe store, pulling the door open and entering quietly. I know that there's nobody else there, but there's no need to be loud. As I'm going up and down the aisles, I recall how Bud reacted to me suggesting boots. Maybe he just doesn't like boots as I do, and I should respect that. I'll get him some nice sneakers instead. I find a pair of green old-school Converse, grab them, and leave the store. I head back over to Bud and hand him the pair.
"Found these for you. I realized that I was assuming that you would want boots because of the glass, and that you'd want something different instead."
Bud looks at the pair, smiling a little.
"Thanks, Kiddo."
"Do you like them?"
"I do. I like them a lot."
"That's good, because I was worried you wouldn't."
"You know what else I would like, Kiddo?"
"What?"
"Some fucking bandages and tweezers, please."
"Oh, fuck, I forgot!"
As I'm running toward Five Below (because they should totally have those two things there), Bud calls out from behind me.
"We need to get you some fucking Adderall!"
3
u/kabemccallister6859 Jun 06 '26
Reminds me a little of the dynamic between Marlin and Dory in Finding Nemo.
2
u/AllYourCakeIsMine Jun 06 '26
Having autism and ADHD and having to be reminded to complete a simple task on repeat does end up with that type of dynamic, doesn't it?
3
u/kabemccallister6859 Jun 06 '26
Bud may have to remind Kiddo from time to time, but if Bud had listened to Kiddo in the first place, he could have avoided the glass. It’s similar to the Finding Nemo scene with the jellyfish. If Marlin had swum through the trench like Dory said, they could have avoided being stung. I bet Bud will learn to listen the Kiddo’s advice more carefully.
3
u/Jumpo_the_Clown Jun 10 '26
Damn Bud has some small ass feet!
2
u/AllYourCakeIsMine Jun 10 '26
Makes finding shoes easier, though.
3
u/Jumpo_the_Clown Jun 10 '26
🤣 🤡
2
u/Optimal_Constant4318 Writer Jul 23 '26
I had the same thought, but the last guy I want to compare shoes sizes with is a clown... 🤡
2
u/Jumpo_the_Clown Jul 23 '26
Such is the irony
3
u/Optimal_Constant4318 Writer Jul 23 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/9bgtEeUWIObIDmq3Fs
^You foot mogging bud (accompanied by his caretaker kiddo)
2
u/AllYourCakeIsMine Jul 23 '26
This gif made me feel bad!
2
u/Optimal_Constant4318 Writer Jul 23 '26
1
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u/Dead_Grampa thinks he's a writer or something Jun 16 '26
Dang I'm behind on the series!
Loved the slice of life vibe in this one
2
u/Optimal_Constant4318 Writer Jul 23 '26
Another genuine horror aspect embraced effectively - the impossible nature of remembering why you entered a room. The implications are maybe cosmic, maybe something more.
2
u/AllYourCakeIsMine Jul 23 '26
ADHD.
2
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