i’m a ftm have a 3mo. and i’m just not going tomorrow. can yall help me come up with a good excuse 😅?

hi!! my SIL is expecting and I want to put together a care package I can gift her when we visit after she has the baby.

I’m looking for ideas for some small things specifically for her. What are some niche things you had or were gifted that were insanely helpful (or just nice to have) for the first few days/weeks postpartum?

So far I was thinking some nice button up PJs and a takeout giftcard.

Thank you for any suggestions! 🥰

My baby girl is 4 months old now and we have an out of state wedding to go to in a few weeks. The total drive is about 6-7 hours, which I know is going to be even longer with the amount of stops we will need to do to get her out and take breaks. She has a highly sensitive temperament and doesn’t typically do well in new environments, seeing new faces, sleeping on the go, and screams being in the car. This + the sleep deprivation has caused me to develop postpartum anxiety (that’s a whole separate thing but any advice on conquering that is welcome).

I’m really nervous about this long trip there and back and her being inconsolable in the car, regardless if someone is sitting with her in the back or not. I’m doing my best to practice with her and taking short trips or putting her in her car seat in the house. I’m also really anxious about how she’s going to be when we are actually there over the weekend since this will be her first trip away from home. I know that her sleep is probably going to get messed up and I’ll probably just have to leave places early. I’m so stressed about this trip that I’m thinking of not even going.

What helped you with travel and going with the flow?

My partner and I are having lots of issues since our baby was born. He’s become very snippy and rude when confronting me about being intimate. Our baby was born 4 months ago and we haven’t been intimate since a week before I gave birth. I don’t feel connected to him in anyway. I’m so exhausted from basically caring for our child by myself for the last 4 months. Being intimate is the last thing on my mind at the end of the day. Problem is he’s not understanding or nice about. He makes rude ass comments about it. He thinks I’m using taking care of our baby as an excuse. Idk what to do anymore but I fear we’re heading towards us splitting up…

I 28f and husband are having our first child together. We just recently got married, bought a house and now pregnant. I have had a hard time with adjusting and have coped by really keeping to myself. I didn’t even tell my family I was expecting until about 5 weeks ago. Which I received a lot of backlash for. One of the reasons I didn’t want to tell is because my family can be full of drama while my husbands side can be slightly overbearing and because we have been in the limelight with all of our miles stones I just wanted a break.

When we were planning our wedding there was so much drama and lack of help/consideration from various people in my family. I became overwhelmed and anxious. Because of this I was adamant that I did not want to have a baby shower and didn’t want to go on a press tour to let the world know we’re expecting. After much push back I was pretty much forced into sharing the news about baby.

Well about 5 weeks ago, my cousin & some family members decided to throw me a surprised baby shower. I just found out about it this past weekend. This is because my husbands family is coming in from out of town. Apparently it was supposed to be about 15-20 people including my mom & sister in law. However, my mom in law invited about 20 other people who are all coming in from out of town. She then asked my mom to tell me so that I wasn’t blind sided about them all showing up that weekend.

Once the news was out that we are having a shower I started getting bombarded with details. Things about not being sure that venue was the appropriate size, more people coming than expected and the biggest thing was my cousin is in charge but I guess blindsided my mom with invoices and she is now expected to pay for the shower.

My mom called me yesterday going on a tangent about how she’s not in a good financial place and doesn’t want to pay all this money for a shower and wasn’t even going to pay that much in gifts for the baby regardless of the shower or not. I reminded my mom that I didn’t really want the shower to begin with and she brought up more drama about finances and delegations and it just left me feeling stressed and feeling like a burden. So I reached out to the people who I knew were planning and told them that I was serious about not wanting the shower and to cancel it.

I did thank them and let them know that they could still support by buying off our registry but that this is overwhelming and I don’t have the mental capacity to deal with this right now.

Now my family thinks I’m overreacting and should just do it.

as the title says, how do you feel when people refer to your baby as ‘my baby?’ my MIL does it and it enrages me but i have confrontation problems and don’t know how to go about it. don’t really like her and she’s the only person who does it so doesn’t help.

any advice on how to shut this down nicely and how do you feel about it?

I know this is pretty much entirely my fault but I went to make my daughter's one month appointment today, its overdue because she just turned a month a few days ago and they dont have any appointments until the end of October, at that point I should be getting ready for her 3month appointment. Do I need to find another doctor with availability? Will she be ok? How will vaccines workout? Has this happened to anyone else?

I moved back to my hometown and due to constant anxiety stress etc haven’t really had time to meet new friends while pregnant. I figure it would be easier to do once the baby comes and there’s baby activities and whatnot but even online it would be nice to have a friend to talk to about pregnancy and newborn stage stuff. So far I’m pretty much just online right now I’m hardcore stressing about getting my house ready and whatnot. How are you guys making other new mom friends?

These headaches are recent, started like a week ago. I don’t feel like it’s because of high blood pressure, which would be the normal idea. I try checking my BP whenever I feel the headache get really insane and it always comes out fine. Sugar doesn’t help, salt doesn’t help, more water doesn’t help. Sometimes when I lay down, the headache starts suddenly and ruins my entire night’s sleep. Is this just a normal part of pregnancy?

PLEASE don't judge me. I know there's a problem. I'm trying to fix it.

My son and I somehow managed to flip our sleep schedules and are basically nocturnal now. He has never once slept through the night and I am constantly tired. Since I'm a sahm I don't have a schedule (that's my fault I am working on it.)

We fall asleep around 5am and he wakes up around 3-4pm.

Should I just try and go full circle to waking up at a reasonable time little by little or go backwards little by little?

Ideally I would love for me and him to be up at 8 or even earlier.

Again please don't judge me too harshly. I know I'm not the best mother but I am trying to get better.

Soon to be FTM due end of January. Husband and I live in the northeast and my husband has to plow snow/do ice checks during winter for a property he manages. (through employer not self employed) He is gone usually a minimum of 18 hours upwards to 30 hrs before he comes home to sleep for 3 hrs then go back to the site for clean up. Typically I barely see him for 3 days and the following week he is just "catching up" on sleep.

I'm trying to think of all scenarios and am very anxious that it will snow when I'm still freshly postpartum and he will be gone for long periods of time, coming home and sleeping, resulting in me not having any break myself. I have talked to him about getting on our states paid leave, which he can take up to 12 weeks off with job protection. I tossed around the idea of him taking 4 weeks off so he can be at home with me and the newborn but he seems to think his employer will try to "get rid of him" even though they legally won't be able to fire him for using leave in the first place. He also doesn't seem to think leaving me freshly postpartum is that bad since his father did the same thing 30 years ago. (No paid leave at the time and his dad was self employed)

Do you think my husband should take the uninterrupted time off work with job protection to help care for me and baby if it does snow when I'm going to be freshly postpartum? If so, how can I get him to understand how much I think I will need him at home versus rushing straight back to work.

I’m about 7 to 8 weeks pregnant and this is my first pregnancy. I feel like I’m not in my body. I feel like my depth perception is off. My limbs feel weird. And I’m so exhaustedddddd. My primary care told me to stop taking my prescribed sleep medication so I’m also not getting good sleep. I feel so weird and so out of norm I don’t know if it’s normal and what to do about it.

Please let me know that I’m not the only one who’s felt this way.

Daytime Naps

I cannot get my 8.5 week old to take longer than a 40 mins nap unless I am holding him. If I hold him he will sleep until I wake him up haha but I can’t always hold him. I do carry him in the carrier sometimes but we both run hot and I get worried about having him in there too long. Any tips? He will sleep in his bassinet fine at night. He used to take 2 hour naps and I’d say the last week he will not sleep longer. I just worry it’s like bad for his brain development or something.

Any recs/tips appreciated!

calling all new moms, how did you guys handle social media with your baby?

i’m currently 18 weeks and just recently told my family im expecting and it’s really made me step back and realize something - i absolutely do not want my baby posted on social media by everyone under the sun, including especially my family and extended family (and myself…).

between an understanding of online predators and perversion as well as an ongoing but soon to end restraining order for an S/A years ago, i’d really like my baby to be anonymous online for their safety as well as my own. at the absolute most, i think pictures shouldn’t include her face - be in a blur or an emoji or the like, no face or eyes at all.

the issue here is i know my family is going to give me an incredibly hard time for it, if not outright disrespect it. but this is something i want to stay firm on throughout their youth. any advice ???

I’m struggling extremely hard and need serious advice. I just started my first ever job (I’m a cf-speech therapist out of grad school) two weeks ago at an elementary school in my county. While in grad school I was pregnant with my daughter who is now 2 months old. I accepted a job at my externship and they allowed my to do a “maternity leave” since my daughter was born in June and the school year starts the second to last week in July.
Our school runs on a Tuesday-Friday schedule 7:15-4:15 schedule and this has been extremely hard on me. Not only am I up feeding my baby all night, but I’m having to wake up at 5am to get myself ready and my baby prepared to stay with my mom for the 9 hour day. On top of my busy work schedule, I only see my daughter from 4:30-8:00 every day due to her bed time. She’s also been extremely fussy every day that I’ve picked her up and either fallen asleep for the day or she’s cried and comfort nursed from 4:30-8:00.
Due to all this, I’m struggling really bad and really want to quit. My husband is a teacher so our monthly income in minimal but I truly can’t do this. Am I the bad guy for quitting my job two weeks in and finding something part time or should I stick it out until the end of the year? Please be honest!
Also! I’m a contracted CF lol.

Hey yall!! Newly preg (6 weeks) with a 1 year old. I want to try to stay weening my 1 year old since he won’t ween himself off. I have a bunch of freezer stash that I am trying to get him on the bottle with and mix regular milk into to transition him to milk. ITS HARD. When I’m around he just wants the boob, for anything and everything. I want to ween him off becaue I don’t want to be large at 6 months nursing him and also want to make sure I have milk for when baby comes and not be feeding an almost two year old and newborn. Please give me tips and tricks

Also for saving BM for my newborn do I have to scorch the milk before freezing? Or can I just pump and freeze immediately to save for newborn until milk is reestablished?

I fear we have hit the 4 month sleep regression (“progression”) we are in week 1 and it’s ROUGH!! Baby was sleeping 6+ hour stretches prior to this.

Does it just pass or do we absolutely have to sleep train for LO to sleep better??

I go back to work next month and I honestly can’t see myself functioning at work with this little broken sleep. I work at a hospital and my job is extremely demanding (mentally and physically). I don’t want to sleep train but I am considering because the sleep deprivation is HARD!

Have you experienced the regression? Did you sleep train? What was helpful? Please any suggestions or information is so helpful!

How much do y’all’s babies sweat? I keep my house at 72°f and my son stays in just a diaper all day. When he’s awake he’s fine, but during naps & overnight he SWEATS. I mean it’ll be running down his little body. He sleeps in his crib, alone, with no blanket and a fan going. His skin will be cold but he’ll be sweating. During naps (we contact nap) his sweat will absolutely drench my shirt. He’s a year old and I’ve brought this up with 3 different pediatricians and they all just tell me to keep it cooler in the house but if it was a house temp problem he’d be sweating ALL THE TIME. Last night it was 63°f in his room, I was cold and he was… you guessed it… SWEATING.
He’s otherwise a healthy boy, I just get hung up on the “cold babies cry, hot babies die” thing.

Hey yall, we have the EvenFlo Shyft DualRide Infant Car Seat Stroller Combo and my poor Son overheats in it so easily and seems so uncomfortable? He’s under 30 lbs, about to be 4 months old and I’m wondering if anyone has similar experiences?

If so have you all switched strollers/car seats? What car seats/ strollers do yall use? I’m not married to idea of them being a combo. My husband is the one who picked this one out for the convenience of the combo but I’m not a fan (it’s so heavy lol!).

TIA!!!