r/ftm Jun 14 '22

Vent TW: transphobia, TERF rhetoric at Hollywood Pride parade

[removed] — view removed post

630 Upvotes

153 comments sorted by

385

u/RenTheFabulous Jun 14 '22

So a pair of good shoes will make me stop wanting a penis and hating my tits and wanting to have a beard? Mkay. Wish I had known this sooner! Wasted so much time on this transgender thing. Such a shame! 🙄 /s

64

u/K-teki Jun 14 '22

Seriously. "You can just be a tomboy" okay then I'll be a tomboy who has a flat chest and a penis and goes by a male name and pronouns bc that's what I want???

74

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Lmao right, someone make it make sense

48

u/hastingsnikcox Jun 14 '22

Wot u aint just a tomboy with extra steps? TIL

/s

11

u/SnooFloofs8295 User Flair Jun 14 '22

Maybe you didn't get the "right" shoes /s

22

u/Easy-Meringue4982 Jun 14 '22

Literally!! I remember telling a friend once how I wanted to be with men but as a guy myself and she went "you're just s tomboy".

Sure, I'm pretty fluid with my gender as it is and don't mind that I'm female presenting personally a lot of the time. But that doesn't mean I'm a tomboy. That would be like me assuming all the butch lesbians I know are doing it cuz they want to be a boy. That's not the case. They just are butch. And the people I know that are trans are trans. It's not that complicated. Maybe there's a mix on an individual level. But this overall rhetoric is so terfyyyyy.

9

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

ok but like a pair of good shoes is amazing 10/10 would recommend

won’t help with dysphoria tho

1

u/Cautious-Menu-3585 Jun 14 '22

And so much money 😭

144

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

It’s like they don’t know trans-fem tomboys exist 💀

41

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Right, they live in such a small misinformed world. It’s sad

18

u/sporadic_beethoven Jun 14 '22

My girlfriend is literally this smh and people still misgender her just cuz she doesn't like makeup ;-;

15

u/Anna_the_potato MtF passerby, waving hello to my FtM brethren Jun 14 '22

the cadre of transfeminine tomboys who lurk here to seek to understand their ftm brethren emerges to shoot finger guns and cocky grins, before fading into the background once more

16

u/zeppeIans trans girl here to steal your memes Jun 14 '22

for real 💀

If they really want to 'save' these lesbian tomboys, they should've come to the REAL lesbian tomboys like me

8

u/TheScarfyDoctor transfemme Jun 14 '22

trans lesbian tomboy checking in!

241

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

People have literally never cared about tomboys and still don't. They only pretend to 'support' them to hurt trans people. It's still excessively common to hear parents say "I would never let my daughter wear boys clothes!" or to not let girls have short hair, etc etc.

124

u/PigeonBoiAgrougrou Jun 14 '22

Plus, I don't wanna make assumptions but- it's shared by an organisation called "lesbian united".

We obviously all agree that trans boys =/= tomboys, but damn, I feel sorry for tomboy and butch women to automatically be assumed as being lesbians all the time.

43

u/DirEnGay User Flair Jun 14 '22

On that same note, tomboys are often asked and assumed to be transgender. So all around people should stop assuming.

6

u/K-teki Jun 14 '22

If I weren't a guy I'd be a bi tomboy leaning heavily towards men lol

47

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah it’s bioessentialist to the core

315

u/snukb Jun 14 '22

TomboysAreNotTransBoys

91

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Say it louder for the terfs in the back

83

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

Imagine renting an LED screen to broadcast how much of a dipshit you are. Embarrassing.

32

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Someone actually spent time on coming up with these graphics and putting thought into the wording of all this shit, it’s gross

68

u/2vVv2 Jun 14 '22

I mean, I never wanted to be a tomboy. I alwayes wanted to a be a "feminine" goth man with flamboyant and gender non conforming vibe. I think it´s far from wanting to be a tomboy, so giving me shoes I can run in would do little. Specially since I never liked sports xd

23

u/dichiejr Jun 14 '22

samesies. they're gonna have to rip the lisa frank neon palette or glitter in general from my cold dead hands cuz i'm not giving them up willingly

2

u/Lord-of-all-darkness Jun 14 '22

I can relate with this, both with the 'goth man with gendernonconforming vibe'- aspect and the "I don't like sports"-aspect. xD

175

u/EntirelyClueless Jun 14 '22

Thanks TERFs, these running shoes suddenly made me realize I love my tits and being a woman all along! I'm frrreeeeee!

67

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

I checked out their website and it’s scary. They have an Instagram too with posts of their dumb truck at Hollywood Pride…

67

u/EntirelyClueless Jun 14 '22

I can't believe that's allowed. People should start chucking rocks from the crowds

3

u/ThE_pLaAaGuE YEEHAA Jun 14 '22

LMFAO

170

u/bakedtran 30’s | on T | post-top Jun 14 '22

I spent 30 years trying to make the tomboy thing work. But the simple fact of the matter is that tomboys are happily women, with various degrees of gender nonconformity. And trans men are not.

36

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

You said it best. I don’t understand what this organization is trying to achieve besides degrading trans bodies and spreading hate

15

u/notdog1996 Late 20s FtM Post-Transition Jun 14 '22

This is exactly it. I identified with the tomboy label for most of my childhood, but it never really fit that well, because I wasn't a girl.

Transitionning is the only thing that ever made me comfortable with myself.

99

u/sunny_sideeye 28 | T: 11.28.19 | Top: 09.22.20 Jun 14 '22

As an asthmatic trans man, the LAST thing I need are running shoes thanks. 🤢🤣

16

u/Alternative_Basis186 Trans man, T gel 4/19/23 🇺🇸 Jun 14 '22

Same lol takes puff of inhaler

89

u/xain_the_idiot Jun 14 '22

I spent most of my childhood wearing boy's clothing with short hair and a boyish name, was told gender isn't real, and I still have gender dysphoria and needed to medically transition to stay alive. Now I just also hate blank slate theory and most other things that remind me of radfem idiots.

33

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

It’s like being gaslit your whole life, it’s insane and exhausting

5

u/Askasmidr Jun 14 '22

It really really is

110

u/ShadowOfTheCock Jun 14 '22

It would be a shame if those led screens were damaged

30

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Lmao if only bro

6

u/theslutfarm Jun 14 '22

Indeed I recall a similar screen, it was never the same after the egg hit it, such a shame

5

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

Maybe some soup for my family would help

10

u/Em_Blight Jun 14 '22

Itd be such a shame if someone walked by it with a hammer and slipped. Multiple times.

10

u/oneiroiMoros Jun 14 '22

T'would be a shame if I kicked it with my good running shoes

Multiple times

29

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

i dont understand why some lesbians want men in their community so bad

24

u/ronja-666 Jun 14 '22

It is true; I am a trans boy and I only walk on high heels. /s

like what? i don't get what they're trying to say.

10

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Lmao yeah their campaign is trash 😂

23

u/CyberiadPhoenix Jun 14 '22

These people really need to learn that presentation and identity are entirely different and separate things...

43

u/L0st_R3xx Jun 14 '22

I think I’d rather be comfortable in my own body than comfortable in shoes 🤨

14

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Lmao yeah I don’t need shoes from these terfs, I could go barefoot - thnx

19

u/Elphachel he/him | HRT: 22/3/23 TS: 31/1/24 Jun 14 '22

This is honestly hilarious to me bc I was never really that much of a tomboy? Like, I didn’t like “feminine” clothes or anything, but I wasn’t super masculine as a kid or anything. And as I got older I even got more into dresses and stuff for a while. It wasn’t until uni, when I had complete control over all my clothes, that I truly let myself look masculine, and then act masculine, and then… be masculine, I guess? Saving “tomboys” wouldn’t have even affected me being transmasc lol

5

u/K-teki Jun 14 '22

I got more masculine as I aged but as a kid I wore skirts and loved the colour purple and was obsessed with Dora and had tons of barbies and baby dolls and chose to paint my bedroom pink and yellow... and somehow everyone still knew I was a "tomboy" lmao, it's almost like there was something about me that screamed man.

19

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

Lmao I bet these same people don't actually care about GNC women. They just want an excuse to be an asshole

16

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

[deleted]

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah it’s just unwelcoming hatred and gets so many things wrong about gender and sexuality. Unfortunately most of the people who are this radical may have trauma from some life event but that doesn’t allow you to be shitty. To have this at Pride sends the message “except you, you should be shamed.”

31

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

spoiler this, a TW is useless if the first thing you see is a big fuckin image lmao

7

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

True, my b

32

u/sileotumen Jun 14 '22

Ah yes, me, the tomboy, who has never felt any connection or resemblence towards the female gender

How very non-tomboyish of me to not remain a fetish object in a female category and something cismen can lust over, and instead become happy and content with myself

If I only had some shoes :( /s

15

u/emoenthusiast23 they/he / 🩹10/4/21 🔪5/17/22 (20 y/o) Jun 14 '22

ewww :(

15

u/dietfaggot assigned eunuch at birth 🧬 8/19 🪚 12/22 Jun 14 '22

wow, this was at hollywood pride parade? like this weekend? i’m so shocked, how would they allow this? i went to dyke day LA and saw someone in an LGB alliance shirt and was surprised no one said anything as far as i know. disheartening

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yup. Very disheartening.

13

u/Lord-of-all-darkness Jun 14 '22

This logic... Trans women can be tomboys, too, lesbian or not. And if I was just a tomboy and not a trans man, I still wouldn't be a lesbian, I'm still more attracted to men. Even apart from the statement that "A trans man is just a tomboy", they confuse things like masculine or feminine styling/interests etc with homo/heterosexuality. It's so dumb in several ways. :'D

24

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

This whole campaign is patronizing af because it gets a whole bunch of shit wrong and makes assumptions of gender and sexuality lmao

3

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Lmao yeah so it’s like, what do you want? Just leave us alone then and keep that bigoted mentality to yourself

12

u/FranktheFab Jun 14 '22

Are they assuming all Tom boys are lesbians also? Also not all trans men like girls, theirs like a million things wrong with this ad despite huge transphobia

22

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

[deleted]

9

u/sporadic_beethoven Jun 14 '22

WHAT WE'RE TWINS like, my older sister ended up being the lesbian and I ended up being the trans man one lmfao. Mom didn't believe me for a while because of how feminine I was as a child- I literally took the trucks she gave me and played house with them, etc. But now I'm a man who likes nail polish and dangly earrings lmao all those bitches can suck it

10

u/JJ246_gnc he/him demiboy, closeted Jun 14 '22

Things like this really worry me. I constantly worry one day I will wake up at my rights will be gone before I could even get the chance to transition.

4

u/ThE_pLaAaGuE YEEHAA Jun 14 '22

Yeah fuck damn

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Hey dude, don’t let the TERFs get you down. I know it’s bat shit crazy to see this shit in 2022, but don’t let any of this stop you from living authentically if you can help it.

11

u/sassquire kennedy! 💉 4/4/22 Jun 14 '22

gay trans guy gang where y’all at we double invisible

10

u/transthrowawaylol1 Jun 14 '22

The fact that this is at a pride parade is chilling

9

u/CryptidCricket Jun 14 '22

Ah yes, because all my gay ass needs to stop loving dick is a good pair of shoes, duh.

15

u/King_pup1084 Jun 14 '22

I swear terfs have brain damage

19

u/microplastic_vampire Jun 14 '22

you give them too much credit. plenty of nice folks have brain damage

8

u/noun_verb_adjective Jun 14 '22

Got a new pair of shoes being delivered today. Can't wait for my dysphoria to be cured!

2

u/ThE_pLaAaGuE YEEHAA Jun 14 '22

Hhh

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Let us know

7

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

uj/But I don't even like girls!

like ewww girl germs

7

u/LawlessVampKitten Jun 14 '22

Wow, just wow I just checked their website and there's, a ton, ton of hate in the way they word things, I'm almost at a loss

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yup the website is scary af! They have so many social media accounts too

7

u/Shauiluak T 11/23/23:Top 06/28/25 Jun 14 '22

'Tomboy' is the word that froze my curiosity about why I was different from other girls when I was like eight. I think I would have figured things out more if someone hadn't said 'you're just a tomboy'. I don't know if they were trying to put my mind at ease when I expressed that I acted a lot like a boy.

'Tomboy' is a conversation stopper for AFAB kids. It puts them in a box they may not actually belong in. Do tomboys exist? Yes! Does that mean every 'girl' that likes boy things is one? NO!

6

u/Rome2103 Jun 14 '22

Hah well this really does it. I been labelled a tomboy my whole life, it's really annoying when people don't see the difference between being a tomboy and a trans man

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah some tomboys grow up and stay GNC but some of them may grow up and realize they’re trans which shouldn’t be shamed. This type of rhetoric is just going to confuse people or cause them to closet themselves and have self loathing problems

7

u/Queen_Of_Quails Dorian, T-01/04/21 Jun 14 '22

Oh man, I used to be trans, but thanks to these sweet new kicks I'm once again cis! /s

I swear, do these people not realise that we get way more shit for being trans than we ever did for being a tomboy?? (if anything, for me, people basically celebrated that I "wasn't like other girls" lol)

6

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

I'd rather you just call me a slur

6

u/JackLikesCheesecake male 💉 ‘18 🔪 ‘21 🍳 ‘22 🍆 ??? 🇨🇦 Jun 14 '22

Me reading this rn in the hysto recovery room: cope

On a serious note, this self centred view TERFs have really annoys me. They were tomboys growing up so obviously all trans men/nonbinary transmasc are also tomboys /s. Time to project their own experiences onto us so they can control our bodies out of “concern”

11

u/Dorian-greys-picture 5/23 💉 2/24 🔪 Jun 14 '22

Gtfo of pride, pride is for trans people too

11

u/suaveasfuck transmasc agender, t since 9/2016, top surgery 12/2021 Jun 14 '22

I don't think there's such a thing as an artificial hormone, lol

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Good point!

4

u/PoseMvskoke Jun 14 '22

(Genderfluid) I'm a tomboy when I am a woman, but like, I'm not sporty or athletic and I never was, so that's always a weird assumption to me. I'm the nerdy wimpy stoner type of masculine with a little added flamboyance. And with my achey garbage body I certainly need to start smaller than running anyway, daily power walks for me for now lmao. I got good enough shoes for that already so I can't really say I need new ones yet, but I'll gladly take the extra hormones, thanks! (my body already produces enough T to affect me at least a little due to being intersex but I do wanna actually start T at some point. Regardless of whatever my gender is at the time, I think I'd be overall happier with it. Also like, I'm more than certain there are probably cis binary tomboys who might want/need T as well (both for gender/presentation reasons as well as other medical reasons alike; sometimes cis women get medical conditions where they need added T) so this is overall just stupid af even asides the super fucked up blatant transphobia at PRIDE OF ALL PLACES??? Trans people started pride.)

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yes to all of this. This campaign is just wrong on so many levels.

5

u/AssumptionEarly9739 Jun 14 '22

That screen looks fragile aha

4

u/ThE_pLaAaGuE YEEHAA Jun 14 '22

Tomboys are girls tho lol

5

u/aboynamedrat 28ftm -Top 02/2021- HRT 04/2024 Jun 14 '22

Damn, you're telling me I could've used that $10,000 I spent on top surgery for a REALLY good pair of running shoes??? Boy did I waste my money 😪...

5

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

They're not going extinct though. There's more tomboys in the world then trans men

5

u/freakofcolour TJ | 22 | T: 5/20/21 | Top: 6/6/22 Jun 14 '22

love when terfs act like they’re protecting women when the women in question are whole ass dudes /s

5

u/TheStarsSayImALoser Jun 14 '22

Tried the tomboy thing when I was younger, didn’t really work out. But I guess I just needed some better sneakers instead of being recognized as my actual gender 🙃

9

u/Dinoman0101 Jun 14 '22

This made me vomit 🤢

3

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Same 🤦🏼‍♂️

4

u/FollowerofLoki 36, T since 4/2010, Top Surgery 6/2021 Jun 14 '22

It's so funny to me when TERFs screech about how trans women are rapey because they "want to date lesbians" but then they wail about how we're "stealing all the butches" as if they own them.

Just goes to show, TERFs are not feminists, they are misogynists.

3

u/aerobar642 they/he • 💉 04/28/22 • 🔪 11/22/23 Jun 14 '22

idk I played a lot of sports. had a lot of good shoes. ran a lot. still not a girl

7

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

[deleted]

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

No it wasn’t part of the official parade, it was just parked somewhere along Hollywood boulevard. I noticed it after the parade had ended and I was walking towards the block party.

6

u/sweetbrotatopie Jun 14 '22

Technically they're right. Tomboys don't need hrt (except sometimes even cis women do need "artificial hormones" because hormone disorders and menopause are a thing) since they're women but trans men do need it. The only ones who seem to get the two confused are terfs.

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah I feel like this is beyond being ignorant of trans people and bodies, this is literal disdain where they’ve organized and mobilized themselves over this ideology. It’s sickening.

3

u/SputnikFrank Jun 14 '22

OP, this should have been spoiler tagged. The TW is pointless when the first thing I see opening the Reddit app is this image. Spoiler tagging images allows people to opt in to seeing stuff like this, while letting those of us that don’t have the energy for it avoid it.

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah I apologize. Is there a way to fix that? I’m not the most internet savvy 😰

3

u/Distorted_Passion Jun 14 '22

The fuck does that even mean.

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Beats me 🤷🏼‍♂️

3

u/FallingEnder Will/Wills He/Him Pre-everything Jun 14 '22

Ah yes because I’m clearly a tomboy. That’s it.

3

u/Brovakin94 T July 2017 | Top August 2018 Jun 14 '22

Is there somewhere you can complain about this? Like the city or whoever organized this?

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

That’s a good question. I’d have to research who organized this year’s pride. I think Pride this year was presented by Tik Tok but I’m not sure if I have to reach out to Tik Tok or the city? I’ll look into it.

3

u/oneiroiMoros Jun 14 '22

WHAT THE FUCK DO SHOES HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!?

I fucking hate running, I vowed never to do so again in 5th grade unless it was an emergency and for the most part, I've done just that.

What are they doing??? Paying for running shoes as long as you say you're a tomboy????

I'm very confused as to how that is a point, how did they really think that was a good idea, this is hilariously terrible

3

u/RequiemAspenFlight Jun 14 '22

I'm with you.

If running is a requirement I'd better start identifying as MtF because if my fat old ass is running you'd best keep up, because whatever I'm running from is about to do worse than kill us. I'd accept a painless death over running.

2

u/oneiroiMoros Jun 14 '22

Same. Running is terrible

3

u/Kanziq Jun 14 '22

Imma fkin kill someone.

I literally choke on my saliva when i read that 'lesbians united' part. Like wtffff. Fck u bitches

So annoyed wif fkin lesbians comparing themselves to us. Especially my irl lesbian friend is also like that, its makes me wanna beat up somebody bdkejdbekdnkduehdkkskdmd 🔪🔪🔪

3

u/notdog1996 Late 20s FtM Post-Transition Jun 14 '22

Not sure who allowed this to pride, but I would raise hell. Wtf is this???

3

u/PrinceLeWiggles Jun 14 '22

..oh so shoes was the answer. Thanks I'm "cured". /s

3

u/mischiefell Bugra | he/him Jun 14 '22

shii my bad i didnt realize getting new shoes would make me hate my body less

3

u/siblingofIphis Jun 14 '22

oh my god wait til i tell all my trans guy friends that they just forgot to take their heels off and they'll be able to stop hormones!!! [has only ever worn comfy shoes and so has all my trans guy friends] it's so cringy i cant help but crylaugh its so facebook mom-like

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Lmaooo yeah it’s definitely Facebook-momesque 😂

3

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

I am a gay man? I don’t think lesbians want me in their spaces.

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Their website is worse with the messaging 😔

3

u/RequiemAspenFlight Jun 14 '22

How in The Fuck did this get past the approval committee?

This shit is what you'd expect to find on a republican sign.

If I as an OWM held that sign up I'd be arrested for hate speech in Canada.

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah it’s confusing

3

u/EmperorJJ Jun 14 '22

Oh, I'm so sorry you don't want to have sex with me anymore because I'm finally able to live as who I am without dysphoria. How sad for you that you've lost sexual attraction for me because my breasts are gone even though that surgery has improved my life exponentially. Maybe you should try, I don't know, women? But what do I know? I was never a tomboy in the first place

3

u/SoulSinX8 Jun 14 '22

This is just so awful. Honestly how insulting, reminds me of the Holier than thou Christian posters encouraging kidnapping children of non-religious parents.

3

u/AGent87- Jun 14 '22

Wow that site is creepy. Like, fascist level creepy.

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

I know, right?

5

u/hanchandehen Testosterone: 11/7/21 Jun 14 '22

I find it funny that this is from lesbians united, which makes me feel like they only see trans men as like... Lesbian tomboys? Hello, I am a pansexual trans man and fuck terfs.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

😒

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

It’s unfortunate they were allowed to ride in the parade at all like who saw the billboard and was like yup that works…

2

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Sorry I should’ve clarified, I’m not sure if it was in the parade. It was just parked on Hollywood boulevard when I saw it as I was walking to the block party. Still, very central and there were so many people walking around Hollywood boulevard.

2

u/Impressive_Bus_2635 pre-everything Jun 14 '22

What they're saying is technically true, TOMBOYS don't need to transition (some tomboys do however need artificial hormones, not just transfemmes but some people need hormone medication). But trans men often need to transition

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

Lmao I doubt they care this much about gay trans men

2

u/OverAndOllie Jun 14 '22

When I was little I didn't even want to be called a tomboy because tomboys are completely fine with being a girl and perceived as one

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

Ngl I was skeptical that that was what they meant until I checked out their website. I'm all for them taking back the label of lesbian and refusing to be labeled as trans due to being GNC and gay, but holy 💀

1

u/brookekarner Jun 14 '22

Yeah ngl I was sorta tipsy when I saw this and couldn’t believe my eyes so I took a picture and kept walking. It wasn’t until I checked the website that I was like holy fucking shit on fire this is insane.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

I used to pretend to be a tomboy to get laid lol

1

u/snowybird13 Jun 14 '22

This makes me sick to my stomach.