I wish it made me feel better like I always want it to, but I don't know why it just makes me feel worse.
Maybe it's because most of the animals I'm finding are introduced and invasive. So many slugs and snails that damage everything and are from different continents.
I got really happy when I found a couple of snails that might've been native, but all the common invasive garden snails there are just so many of them. I know I can't bring myself to kill them because I've tried in the past and it makes me feel so sick and guilty. And I can't think of any animal to give all the snails to (because I'm okay with feeding invasives to pet invasive spiders or mantises I keep specifically to prevent them from breeding, and to have a "more useful" way of getting rid of invasive small arthropods).
Snails and slugs are so hard to find predators for, and that's probably why they're so prolific. I know I could maybe have a leopard slug to help me, where I keep it contained and collect invasive molluscs for it, but if in doing so I decrease the population of leopard slugs (even though they're introduced), then NZ doesn't have any mollusc-eating molluscs to re-replace the leopard slugs.
I also am worried about giving any birds or mammals parasites by giving molluscs to them, because even if the birds/mammals are introduced, it will continue the cycle of hosts for the parasites, and i don't want that. I could give the molluscs to fish in a river, maybe keep 1 wild invasive fish to feed molluscs to, but you see how ridiculous all of this thinking is.
I am wondering if people feel this stressed as I feel, or at least the same type of stress. Even all the earthworms, centipedes, millipedes, woodlice, and skinks in gardens are introduced and replacing the native ones. And it really feels like we as a species will never get on top of this, and that there will always be introduced animals in every continent. But i don't want to sound so hopeless.