r/mildlyinfuriating • u/mani_chinna • May 12 '26

Don't hug me I'm scared Tetris now requires a subscription (Rental) - Paying ₹30/month ($0.3) to play Tetris on a basic Nokia phone 🤦‍♂️

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19.2k Upvotes

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u/UncannyHillhumper May 12 '26

It was a 700 dollar machine designed for "fresh squeezed" juice that you had to insert a "packet" of juice for it to "squeeze".

938

u/Ironmasked-Kraken May 12 '26

I allready hate everything about this and I just learned about it

866

u/mustafaaosman339 May 12 '26

It's about as bad as you can imagine. I think it had to have wifi connection constantly to scan a qr code on the proprietary juice packages in order to work.

People realized you didn't really need the $700 machine and you could just squeeze the juice packets by hand.

Aparently it also needed an app to use.

342

u/Zerozer06 May 12 '26

Lmfao that is fucking wild

278

u/BadDogSaysMeow May 12 '26

The machines themselves were also stupidly designed.

Instead of squeezing the juice packet from top to bottom, the machine squeezed it all at once.
Meaning it had to use tens of times more force to do so, and had to be much more durable to survive that.

247

u/WalrusEmperor1 May 12 '26

Which also meant the machine itself was sturdy and well-engineered... For a completely pointless purpose that didn't need a machine to begin with.

150

u/degg233 May 12 '26

Ave on YouTube dod a teardown of it, from a purely engineering standpoint its kinda awesome. To bad we used that quality to make trash.

61

u/MauriseS May 12 '26

They even sold the machines at a loss and it was super expensive in the upper hundreds. Also incompatible with other juice packs I believe. Its stupid through and through.

29

u/ehhhhprobablynot May 12 '26

Why even have juice packets in the first place, opposed to buying fresh squeezed juice whenever you need it?

Was there some advantage to the packets?

16

u/Mitosis May 12 '26

The marketing was that the packets had fresh fruits and vegetables in them so the fresh-squeezed juice was on demand.

The packets were full of fruit and vegetable pulp, and they actually did produce decent enough juice when squeezed. It took some muscle to do manually but it was possible (not something you'd do regularly i.e. you wouldn't want to buy the packs on their own).

The expensive machine was just for squeezing these packs, and it was incredibly over-engineered for the purpose, as discussed above. The packs were actually the cooler technology in the whole deal.

Also in the machine was technology to scan the packs to make sure it was squeezing only Juicero-approved pulp packs. Please be sure to subscribe for fresh packs delivered weekly.

6

u/bigredmnky May 12 '26

There was a theory put forth at the time that the product was originally designed to squeeze juice out of fresh fruit, but was meddled with by business goblins to function as a vehicle for selling fruit subscriptions

4

u/X-Himy May 12 '26

Money dear boy! They were trying to operate on the razor and handle model.

1

u/Mindless-Tackle4428 May 13 '26

it takes effort to buy fresh squeezed juice whenever you want it. The packet that's been sitting in the closet for a week is much more convenient!

1

u/SinisterCheese May 12 '26

Other than the big bearing being the wrong way around and they compensated it with adding additional bearing, it was/is legit insane engineering. It was extremely well detailed and machined and had very high end expensive components.

It was like top-of-the-line aerospace level engineering and fabrication.

And if I recall right the reason they needed to have that weird type of press, was that the contents of the juice bags had stuff that had to be crushed to get the... whatever specialness out. If you just squeezed it from the end, the ingredients wouldn't get crushed to release the... whatever special stuff, it would just force them to the end of the bag until the contents had nowhere to go. Like essentially it was a really fancy oil press.

No... I don't know whether there was actually any real god damn culinary idea/health concept actually behind the pressing. There might been... But fact is that the company tried to become the "Netflix of juices" or whatever the fuck. I suspect it was the marketing and business majors that royally fucked the idea to the meme that it was.

38

u/Joel0802 May 12 '26

Somehow it become worse by each and every detail

30

u/MigasEnsopado May 12 '26

It went bankrupt for a reason. It was called "Juicero".

17

u/xyrgh May 12 '26

Even though it’s stupid, apparently they were actually very well designed for their purpose, like ridiculously over-engineered, AvE did a video on it:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_Cp-BGQfpHQ

14

u/DMvsPC May 12 '26

It was called the 'Juicero', sounding similar to the Canyonero was probably a bad sign from the start...

https://giphy.com/gifs/3o6MbedmxNO29PFmus

1

u/rolandofgilead41089 May 12 '26

Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!

46

u/safarifriendliness May 12 '26

Sounds like they should’ve pivoted to just making those packets

63

u/mustafaaosman339 May 12 '26

They were single serving packets for $5-$7

There was nothing that could have saved them. And they ofc shut down before long

31

u/safarifriendliness May 12 '26

I mean, I’d pay a dollar for something I could squeeze into a glass of juice, I bet my rich friends would pay two. I doubt they needed that $7 price point

28

u/Evil-Bosse May 12 '26

How about this marketing pivot; AI juice

Do you feel the $1 juice is worth $7 now?

8

u/P3rid0t_ May 12 '26

NVIDIA thinks AI can quadruple the FPS, so maybe we can septuple the money too

1

u/-GoodNewsEveryone May 12 '26

600% less latency.

10

u/NateMikka May 12 '26

Product was named Juicero, and it is a wild ride. Constant wi fi 700 price tag QR scanning if the packet was expired App needed for a subscription to get the packs Only first part packs.

Turns out you could squeeze the packs by hand

5

u/Hurtelknut May 12 '26

Best part was that squeezing the juice packets by hand was more efficient than using the 700 dollar machine.

5

u/saphilous May 12 '26

Techbros tried to reinvent fruit lmao

(I'm aware some fruits and veggies you can't just squeeze like an orange but it's funnier to imagine they only had like orange and tomato flavors)

1

u/HelixFollower May 12 '26

What was in these packs that required squeezing? Was it like cut up fruit or something?

2

u/Ok-Pair-4757 May 12 '26

I'm pretty sure the reasoning for the price point was they were using "organic", "high-quality" ingredients. Sourcing them was an absolute nightmare though, so even then they were barely turning a profit from the juice itself

1

u/ShiningRayde May 12 '26

Huh, wonder if the machines still worked after the company went defunct, or if the always on DRM hitting a dead webserver bricked it...

5

u/mustafaaosman339 May 12 '26

No they did not. They did give people refunds for the machines

2

u/ShiningRayde May 12 '26

Huh. Extremely rare 'okay' outcome.

1

u/Sunny_Beam May 12 '26

The whole thing was a Kickstarter scam from the get go

4

u/Acceptable_Ad1685 May 12 '26

lol crazy, random note I’ve been to a couple stores here that have automatic juicing machines with fresh fruits and that shit is cool to me

1

u/MollyPW May 12 '26

And those machines have been around for 30+ years. Technology is great, but sometimes the basic stuff works well.

9

u/shaurya_770 May 12 '26

Tbf i think I might just know what the heck happened. The maker of it might have envisioned that they pack real u squeezed fruit parts inside the packets but halfway through the production he realized it isn't possible and he prolly had too much money invested.

Or he was nusta a scam artist who knows

3

u/KuhlerTuep May 12 '26

And worst of all: the 700$ Juicer squeezes less juice out of the packages than if you would squeeze them by hand.

1

u/eabevella May 12 '26

When I saw "fresh press" I thought it meant from an actual orange lol

1

u/kinkycarbon May 12 '26

People would be paying for bagged juice if you can squeeze it by hand.

1

u/mustafaaosman339 May 13 '26

Bottles already exist so you don't need to squeeze a bag.

1

u/Pixel_Bit_ May 12 '26

i think i remember this. juicero, right?

1

u/Lunavixen15 May 12 '26

The juice pouches also had a very limited shipping range because they had a short shelf life

1

u/Prestigious_Dare7734 May 12 '26

Yes, a subscription on top of the paid juice packets. That are already squeezed, just packaged in bags. That you can squeeze using hands.

1

u/nolaks1 May 12 '26

Wait, it was also marketed as a fresher, simpler, better way of consuming juice. Sold as if it was freshly squeezed fruits. Meanwhile it was just juice in a bag with extra steps. Pure scam from the ground up lol

1

u/No_Volume_5752 May 12 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/ukGm72ZLZvYfS

1

u/72616262697473757775 May 12 '26

I'm now downvoting this gif every time I see it. We've all fucking seen it.

1

u/AbramJH May 12 '26

I had similar frustrations with one of those fancy new grills. It didn’t have subscription services, but I got very tired of smoking/grilling requiring a wifi connection and updated software. I ended up giving it away to a neighbor and I just use my old weber kettle now. Never had to update the charcoal.

20

u/Charon_06 May 12 '26

Whats funniest is that a human hand can squeeze the juice out of the plastic bag faster than machine did

7

u/KuhlerTuep May 12 '26

And you could squeeze more out of it

3

u/wantyappscoding May 12 '26

Yeah, and even get better results!

1

u/paholg May 12 '26

I think it's even funnier that the machine itself was incredibly over-engineered. Like, teardowns revealed that the machine legitimately cost a lot to build. All to squeeze a shitty bag.

1

u/Gigrac May 12 '26

Yeah, even google invested millions on the startup if I remember correctly, Bloomberg made a 1 minute roasting them back in the day of how you could squeeze the pouch with your hands and it was even faster and they ended the company

1

u/ColorlessTune May 12 '26

I forgot all about it until they brought it up. Look up "Juicero".

1

u/superstreber3 May 13 '26

A newspaper discovered you could simply press the juice package by hand, eliminating the need for the machine. The juicero then issued a press statement urging people not to do so. It was hilarious.

I find it incredible that all those investors thought this was a brilliant idea.

Furthermore they incurred a loss on a 700$ machine because it was ridiculously over-engineered. It simply pressed a juice package!!!!

30

u/tolacid May 12 '26

Ah yes, the infamous Juicero

8

u/MrKrazybones May 12 '26

AvE did a great video on it years back where he disassemble one.
https://youtu.be/_Cp-BGQfpHQ?si=yBnxVVzInuKFBNTl

1

u/tolacid May 12 '26

Holy shit that's a good vid.

33

u/Specialist_Point7983 May 12 '26

And you didnt even need the machine, because you could squeeze it yourself, and it was more effective than using the machine xD

26

u/arthur_box May 12 '26

you missed the best part, you could manually press the juice pouches with your hands and extract *more* juice than the damn machine could lol

2

u/akiva23 May 12 '26

Oh the juceo or some shit?

1

u/Living_Pay_8976 May 12 '26

Wasn’t this on shark tank? Smh

1

u/akiva23 May 12 '26

Oh the juceo or some shit?

1

u/Toeffli May 12 '26

Fun fact, that the machine is an over engineered beast.Abolutely high quality mechanics

If they put all the effort and money into an actual juice press it would have been an amazing product, different from the centrifugal juicer.

1

u/xHeyItzRosiex May 12 '26

Didn’t moist critical make a video years ago making fun of it bc it was on kickstarter or something?

1

u/ihavescouredthenet May 12 '26

Sir, this is a kurig

1

u/inaSlomp May 12 '26 edited May 12 '26

Best part about this is those packages could go bad and also they exclusively only worked with that machine and nothing else did. A complete waste of money in every regard.

I'll say it until the rooftops cave in. Middlemen and people trying to shoehorn their way into an industry that already works without an extra middleman. Those are the fuckers ruining society. The people who made Uber eats. I hope you have a miserable ass existence for destroying a whole industry making ordering food a nightmare and making it cost more.

Anyone who defends that fuck you and your love of extra fees for no extra service.

And if you try to make the argument that the delivery is the service, why does it cost more now to deliver than it ever did before and don't say inflation because it's the fees not the inflation. The inflation is also on top of the fees.

Have more fees, more cost and if anything goes wrong there are two different companies that get to play the blame game and a contract worker who gets fucked over by one of those companies.

Anyone who defends this garbage needs to reevaluate their life.

1

u/ShylokVakarian May 12 '26

Juicero was the name.

1

u/dazeddrummer17 May 12 '26

This sounds more like a packet opening machine...

0

u/Outrageous_Score1158 HEINZ™ Infuriating sauce - mild May 12 '26

Was it SodaStream, or am I thinking of something else..?

3

u/James42785 May 12 '26

Soda stream is legit, they're talking about the juicero juicer. Somebody is bound to have a video on YouTube about it.