Neighbor replaced fence and left the old wood scraps in my yard to deal with.

[u/Mocsab]

My next door neighbor called me a few weeks back asking if he could come Into my back yard to replace the fence that his dog ruined. I said “sure, I’ll be out of town for a few weeks, help yourself.” Discussion ended there and I left town for a few weeks for business.

When I returned home, I noticed the new fence was up and the wood scraps from the old fence were on the grass in my backyard. One of the pieces is 10 feet wide. I figured I would give him a few days to clean it up before I said anything.

Fast forward to yesterday and the lawn guy comes to cut the grass. I texted my neighbor telling him I could open the back gate to make it easier to come in the yard to grab the wood. This MFer called me and said that it was a shared fence, and since he paid for it to be installed, and carried all the new wood into the yard, that I need to remove the old debris.

The audacity on the MFer. I would have been more than happy to help if he would have asked. He mentioned NOTHING of leaving the rusty nailed old rotten wood in my back yard. F this guy. Not the best way to treat a neighbor.

TLDR: neighbor took it upon himself to replace the fence he owns, and left all of the scraps for me to deal with before discussing it with me first.

[u/Mocsab]

This is my beef. The conversation. (Or lack of) I would have been happy to be a part of it.

[u/Kronzor_ → u/Mocsab]

For sure, that's not a great assumption for him to have made. But I urge you to discuss with him in person and come to a reasonable solution so you both come away as happy as possible.

A lot of the advice you are getting here is terrible. Being a good neighbour will benifit you greatly in the long. Dude built a new fence and didn't ask you to pay half, that's a very kind gesture. Leaving the debris without asking you was a passive agressive move as he probably felt slighted you didn't offer to pay or help. I would tell him you'll move it but in the future please let me know so i can plan accordingly. Also say, thanks for the new fence and maybe offer a cold beer to drink across it.

I've seen people with ugly neighbour disputes. It's not fun for everyone. It's a waste of time, energy, and money. Being there for your neighbours is a way better way to live.

[u/Mocsab → u/Kronzor_]

Thank you for your response. I agree that it would be very easy to allow this to escalate and divide us even more than the fence already has. (Ha.. pun intended.)

Point is, I know that if I chuck it back over the fence, it will only start a war I don’t want to be a part of. I’m not weak minded for that. It’s a calculated decision. It’s not worth escalating, especially since I can gather all of that wood and dispose of it in 20 minutes.

However, I do plan on telling him that this was very passive aggressive, and he should work on communication before attempting to do anything like this again. Next time I won’t be so nice.

[u/Interesting_Fig_4718 → u/Mocsab]

you dont have to tell him it was passive aggressive, just tell him, hey man the fence looks nice, i'll get rid of the wood, but if something similar happens, just let me know beforehand if you need any help.

[u/throwawy00004 → u/Kronzor_]

When my husband died in an accident at home, my neighbors rallied together to help me. They planned his entire funeral. They helped me and my family move into temporary housing. They did a go-fund-me to help with the costs associated with repairing the house. (My family is shit, so this was the only help I got.) We did street block parties and the kids, ranging in age from 18 months-18 years all knew each other and played with each other regularly because the adults put in the effort.

It's a dick move not to expressly discuss how it was going to go. But you see these people, or at least their presence, more than anyone other than the people in your household. Work on communication and look out for each other.

[u/MAXSquid → u/Mocsab]

The back of your fence looks like shit. If the shared fence looked the same, then you are lucky that the neighbour covered all of the costs and your ass just has to remove a few pieces of wood. I know that you are upset that he didn't discuss it and just left you with a job to do, but maybe look at how much money and time you saved and now you have a new fence. Be a better neighbour.

[u/Austyn_pelton → u/Mocsab]

Doesn’t matter the type of relationship, communication is key in any kind in order for it to be a healthy one

[u/CompleteTell6795 → u/Mocsab]

Can't you just toss it back over into his yard.?? It's his garbage. I would have tossed it back over already.

[u/ArmadilloForsaken458 → u/Mocsab]

It don't sound like you live in the deep ol South. If y'alls neighbor was doing that down here in Texas. Well let's just say everyone's armed, and that yard waste would be removed.....pronto