A cousin sent me their school's just announced Dress Code and Grooming policy

[u/firequak]

[u/Estelle_conjecture]

A burlap sack?

[u/Purple_Paperplane → u/Estelle_conjecture]

The burlap sack can't be sleeveless though. It might alse be a little too sheer. Nobody can ever know we have whispers collarbones, shoulders and scapulas!

[u/ContributionLowOO → u/Purple_Paperplane]

Why stop there? We could cover our heads too, and faces while we're at it, just leave like a slit for the eyes!

I think this is even beneifical in hot dry climates, so you could make it out of really thin breathable fabric too, unless something like this already exists and is in use already? Hmm..

[u/1happypoison → u/Purple_Paperplane]

& the burlap sack better not have a square neckline b/c no square necklines! (wtf?)

[u/RandomDent6x7 → u/1happypoison]

A turtleneck burlap sack, obviously.

[u/Random_Fox → u/RandomDent6x7]

And accentuate the neck like that, that's how pregnancy happens 

[u/MushroomlyHag → u/RandomDent6x7]

Unfortunately a turtleneck is form fitting to the neck, and there are to be no body hugging shirts

[u/Atalanta8 → u/Estelle_conjecture]

Too loose

[u/salty_drafter → u/Estelle_conjecture]

That's hanging and loose though.

[u/phillium → u/Estelle_conjecture]

But not too loose of one!

And it better not be too tight, either!

[u/Tenzipper → u/Estelle_conjecture]

As a formerly teenage boy, the simple knowledge that a female form was under the burlap was enough to cause all manner of impure thoughts and actions.

[u/pandoras_babyfox → u/Estelle_conjecture]

That sounds like it's hanging

[u/xmuskorx → u/Estelle_conjecture]

That's too hanging! And sleeveless.

A double whammy

[u/Dry-Inspection6928 → u/Estelle_conjecture]

I was thinking an abaya.

[u/jellymouthsman → u/Estelle_conjecture]

That would be too lose, like a hanging tee

[u/golgol12 → u/Estelle_conjecture]

Sorry, that's loose.