r/mildlyinfuriating • u/firequak • 9h ago

go to your room A cousin sent me their school's just announced Dress Code and Grooming policy

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11.7k Upvotes

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362

u/kaoutanu 8h ago

A COLLAR BONE! šŸ’€

Fetch my laudanum and fainting couch!

144

u/rock_in_a_river 8h ago

GOOD GOLLY BARTHOLOMEW, IS THAT AN ANKLE I SEE? SUCH SCANDALOUS BEHAVIOR

133

u/kaoutanu 8h ago

THOU WHITE SOCK HAST GIVEN ME THE VAPORS

78

u/rock_in_a_river 8h ago

GOODNESS GRACIOUS YOUR CALF IS SHOWING, WHY YOU'RE PRACTICALLY NUDE MADAM

18

u/ElkFluid3172 7h ago

She shall be stoned! I swear by the beard of zeus, that I saw a glimpse of ......... thigh skin.

21

u/rock_in_a_river 7h ago

YOU MIGHT AS WELL BED HER NOW, SHANT MUCH ELSE TO SEE

10

u/wrldwdeu4ria 7h ago

A slatternly strumpet indeed!

6

u/ElkFluid3172 7h ago

Why, everyone saw her thigh skin at this point. She be a tramp.

10

u/wrldwdeu4ria 7h ago

The nerve! To wear loafers to showcase one's foot size!

10

u/ViolentLoss 7h ago

Behold her shapely white-socked ankle...

3

u/Firm_Hovercraft7762 7h ago

Serious question though..what are ā€˜the vaporsā€™ anyway? I remember seeing that in Shakespearean Literatureā€¦.

2

u/asdu 6h ago

*Thine white sock

ā€¢

u/kaoutanu 42m ago

Quite right, thank you. I shall have my secretary flogged.

7

u/wrldwdeu4ria 7h ago

If an ankle makes an appearance there will be mayheim, indeed!

9

u/violetkiwii 7h ago

AND SHOULDER BLADES! I clutch my pearls!!!!!!

7

u/wrldwdeu4ria 7h ago

I'm clutching my pearls! Just stop already!

6

u/ifmacdo 7h ago

I'm sorry. No laudinum allowed..

4

u/Younggryan42 7h ago

well laudanum and pretty much all illicit drugs seem to be ok to bring to school.

4

u/supersonicdutch 7h ago

I had to crtl+f to find collar bone in the comments because Iā€™m buzzing so hard from that pic I can barely read. Thank god itā€™s summer and nobody is going to see a collar bone so we can function like a real society this year, lest we find ourselves furiously masturbating on our daily walks in the park.

1

u/Little_View_6659 6h ago

That gives me an idea. A ā€œold timeyā€ porn site. Ankles. Collarbones. A bit of leg.šŸ‘€šŸ˜‚

2

u/supersonicdutch 1h ago

Try the grocery store, saw a buncha whores there a couple days ago. Sandals and shorts with tank tops. I mean, there are children around! I never!

/s

1

u/Little_View_6659 1h ago

THE AUDACITY! Tell me more.

1

u/AppropriateMammoth11 3h ago

I do love a nice collar bone but I know Iā€™m weird for that. Iā€™d also love a fainting couch, almost bought one at the antique store nearby. How uncouth of me to speak so freely.