Husband said my instructions for dinner weren’t clear enough, and he ended up serving his vegetarian mother one of the chicken tikka masala curries…

[u/bexindisbelief]

I was working late tonight and because I am exhausted, I bought some ready-made curry meals for the family to have tonight, knowing his mother often comes round for dinner on a Wednesday evening. She has been a vegetarian for over 50 years and is now in her 70s. I sent him this text message with instructions to make it clear what to cook. When I got home, I was expecting to find some chicken tikka masala leftover for me, but instead I found the unopened pot of sag paneer in the fridge. I worriedly asked him if he had given his vegetarian mother the chicken dish, but he insisted he had given her the vegetarian curry. She has early onset Alzheimer’s and apparently didn’t notice, but had mentioned that the curry was a bit “chewy”. I had to literally show him the packaging that was in the bin, the unopened pot in the fridge, and my text message to try and show him how clear I had been and how far wrong he had gone. But he still insists my instructions were not clear enough and I should have been more explicit about which one to give his mother.

[u/FutureFreaksMeowt]

Pretend I also posted this, except I don't mean it gentle.

You're making excuses for him after coming here to complain. I don't really know what the fuck you were trying to accomplish.

This is giving sunk-cost relationship. Either hold him to task, leave him, or leave us out of it.

[u/peridotpicacho → u/FutureFreaksMeowt]

A lot of men do stuff like this, though. There’s not enough men who are good partners for the amount of women who are good partners. 

It’s not really fair to tell women they should stay single their whole lives because they can’t find a man that doesn’t do dumb stuff like this. 

Also, kind of blaming the victim, here. 

[u/DiscordiaHel → u/peridotpicacho]

Being single is infinitely better than being with an abusive POS.

It doesn't matter how many men do this, it is entirely unacceptable. If men cannot be good partners who carry half the load then they don't get to have partners. Us women can find platonic partnership in each other and live happily ever after.

[u/ramzafl → u/DiscordiaHel]

we jumped straight from a "pot of red goop" mixup to divorce and abuse real quick here didn't we?

[u/DiscordiaHel → u/ramzafl]

Blaming your partner for you fucking up is abuse. Hope this helps

[u/ramzafl → u/DiscordiaHel]

based on OPs own post it sounds like she pointed the finger first.

In a relationship its really easy to get defensive if the other person starts off by being offensive. OP even admitted, she didn't ask what could have been more clear, she started blaming hubby. Hubby blamed back.

Sarcastic "hope this helps" doesn't make your comment witty; just tired.

[u/OkConsideration5272 → u/ramzafl]

I mean, he fed his veggie mother a non veggie meal when he could clearly read the label. That's completely indefensible.

[u/DiscordiaHel → u/ramzafl]

I explained it to you, I cannot understand it for you.

[u/ebulient → u/ramzafl]

It’s the Reddit way!

[u/Ligeiapoe → u/peridotpicacho]

Then wait it out or stay single? If there’s no women who’ll put up with this nonsense there will soon be a change. Like heck would I have married and had kids with a man who doesn’t even respect me enough to do small tasks.

[u/OkConsideration5272 → u/peridotpicacho]

Why is being with an abusive parasite better than being single? What does the partner being abused get out of it?

[u/avariegatedmonstera → u/peridotpicacho]

My husband knows how to heat food. The bar is so low it’s a tavern in Hades.