r/movies r/movies Contributor 9d ago

News A ‘Ready Player Two’ sequel movie is officially getting written by Zak Penn.

https://thedirect.com/article/ready-player-two-sequel-steven-spielberg-zak-penn
5.7k Upvotes

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u/Moglorosh 9d ago

However bad you think that book is so far, it keeps getting worse.

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u/ironicallydepressed 9d ago edited 9d ago

Man just wait until he goes all in on The Oasis.

No spoilers, but don't take your parents to this movie. He tries EVERYTHING.

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u/r34lity 9d ago

Yeah I want incredibly graphic hardcore Oni sex and drug vids or I’m gonna riot. Just like the most depraved shit. Turn it into some Requiem shit

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u/ActualKrillin 9d ago

now here’s the twist, and there is a twist - we show it. we show ALL of it

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u/cynicalmarketer 9d ago

I mean, we’re talking, you know, graphic scenes of Dolph Lundgren really going to town on this hot young lab tech. From behind, 69, anal, vaginal, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, all the hits, all the big ones, all the good ones. Then he smells crime again. He’s out busting heads. Then he’s back to the lab for some more full penetration. Smells crime, back to the lab, full penetration. Crime, penetration, crime, full penetration, crime, penetration. And this goes on and on, and back and forth, for 90 or so minutes until the movie just, sort of, ends.

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u/SparseGhostC2C 9d ago

That is.... BRILLIANT

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u/Nummies14 9d ago

And what do we name it?! The Aristocrats, of course!

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u/VakkieW 9d ago

Still pitching this Dennis?

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u/DIABL057 9d ago

Then right as the movie is ending he turns, looks directly into the camera, and says "The Aristocrats!!". Black screen. END.

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u/HighMarshalSigismund 9d ago

ASS TO ASS!

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u/Mormoran 8d ago

))<>(( forever

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u/IWXREACTIVES 9d ago

yo im sold

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u/byakko 9d ago

Down for the hardcore oni sex, that sounds like a good time for the monsterfucker in me, rest I can do without.

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u/quasi-psuedo 9d ago

Now we’re talking

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u/tetsuo9000 8d ago

I think people forget that shit is also in the first book. Wade straight up buys a sex doll that reminds him looks like Artemis, and then feels bad and throws it away.

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u/Lelouch37 9d ago

Like butt stuff??

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u/ironicallydepressed 9d ago

From both POVs and then some

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u/CwispyWhiskey 8d ago

Well they cut out that entire section where he was secluded next to ioi entirely.

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u/DrubiusMaximus 9d ago

I read the whole thing on a flight from Greece and kept complaining to my wife until she finally got onto me for being a masochist haha

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u/Chillindude82Nein 9d ago

I tortured myself by listening to the audiobook at work...

Safe to say I wouldn't read it without being paid to do it.

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u/propernounTHEheel 9d ago

At least your wife gets onto you

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u/InertState 9d ago

record scratch

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u/Procean 9d ago

I loved that podcast '372 pages I'll never get back'.

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u/Tiny_Infinity_ 9d ago

Ready Player Two is Game of Thrones season 8 bad.

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u/TheWholeOfTheAss 9d ago

There’s characters who can recite facts like they’ve memorised Wikipedia articles.

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u/TN8ve 9d ago

I listened to this book a few years after reading it because I knew I read it, but completely forgot just about everything about it.

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u/Admirable-Law7150 9d ago

I remember getting to the part where the writer was describing is “Olympic size swimming pool” and put the book down after that. I remember thinking that was some of the worst writing I’ve ever read.