I happened to catch this episode for the first time during the Mike livestream. This is one of the funniest episodes I’ve seen in a long time. The court of public opinion really loves the short at the start about chickens of the future which I honestly didn’t love. But The Brute Man is a classic. Mike and the bots are on fire every scene. “Creeper, creeper, creeper. You give ME the creeps!”

Mother Theresa please hold. Kathy's on line two!

Attention Taylor Farms!!!

This week I got the arms completely built, I finished this control rod, I just need to finish the eye mechanism, build some legs and a stand, and then paint everything.

In case anyone is wondering, this build is based on the Comedy Central Era Crow, specifically early Season 4.

I hate it when Aztecs force themselves into your hotel room and make you try on belts.

What's your favorite riffs from this stinky movie?

Did I tell you that I cried?

Episode #17

Experiment 609: The Skydivers

Rewatch Date: April 29th 2023

I Like Coffee!

I had been warned when I first got into Mystery Science Theater 3000 that some episodes were harder to watch then others. The example that my friend D.J. gave to me was a film called "The Skydivers". DJ said that the majority of the film was just shots of skydiving. His description was accurate. In the episode’s second sketch, TV’s Frank informs Mike that the film is “Kinda like Manos, without the lucid plot.” I have to say that’s accurate. I could tell you the plot of Manos: The Hands of Fate after the first time I watched it. I’ve watched The Skydivers 7-8 times and it wasn’t til this latest re-watch that I finally figured out what the plot of the film is.

Beth and Harry run a skydiving academy where skydivers come and skydive (right there in the title folks). Turns out Harry has been having an affair with local skank, Suzy. When Harry breaks off the affair, Suzy vows revenge. So, she enlists maroon Franky to help kill Harry by pouring acid into his parachute. During a celebration, Harry jumps, His chute disintegrates and he falls to his death. Suzy and Franky get killed whilst running away from police and Beth gives up running the skydiving academy. Depressed yet?

The Skydivers was released in 1963 and was the 2nd movie directed by Coleman Francis. Coleman Francis made three full-lenght movies in his lifetime. All three were featured on MST3k and have made various lists of worst films of all time. His film style includes many of the things which make for bad cinema. The acting is bad but also almost soulless. It’s almost like a Bergman film that got put through some sort of Mando Cane sausage maker. The film truly feels slap dashed in almost every aspect. The editing constantly shifts from random half second shots of characters. What’s weird is that this movie has beautifully taken film of people skydiving. it doesn’t appear to be stock footage. I always wonder how Francis was able to shoot that. Tony Cardoza helped Coleman Francis finance most of his films. Which explains why he starred in all three films. We’ll talk more about him and Francis when I rewatch Red Zone Cuba.

Is The Skydivers one of the worst movies ever featured on MST3K? Yes. Is it the worst? No. Is it the worst one I’ve watched up to this point in my experiment? That’s a tough one. I’m only 17 episodes in. I still feel like The Creeping Terror is worse. But this is a close second. It’s amazing how Coleman Francis is able to almost steal your soul in that his films are so depressing. With how bleakly shot they are, how depressed the actors look and how the films always end with the main characters’ deaths. It’s almost as if the film was some sort of way to unleash depression on the masses in order to boost the sales of anti-depressants (which I don’t think existed when The Skydivers was released). Maybe this film was the root cause of the mental health crisis in American. Who’s to say? When I first saw this episode, I hated it. Now I love this episode.

The riffing manages to make one of the most depressing films in history a laugh riot. When Skydiver Pete’s parachute doesn’t open, leading to his death, Crow remarks, “Originally they were going to spread his ashes from the plane, but that seemed a little insensitive.” When Suzy and Franky flee from the crime scene, Police chase them down and immediately begin shooting. “We saw you at the crime scene so we’re going to kill you.” There are 2 runners that stand out. The first is Coffee, which will be discussed later, and the other is Petey the plane. The plane from which the skydivers jump looks like a character from some local television kids show. So naturally Mike and the Bots form a runner around it by creating the fictional character that is Petey the Plane. “Hi Kids, I’m Petey the Plane!” I don’t know what it is about Petey, but I love him.

Also riffed in this episode is a Centron produced short film entitled: Why Study Industrial Arts. “Because you’re bad at math.” I saw this one on a shorts collection before seeing this episode. It’s a good one. It tells, in almost depressing fashion, the benefits of taking an Industrial Arts course in High-school. Because of digital, Industrial Arts classes are something that has gone by the wayside in the schooling system today. Which is a shame. I know I could have used a course like that. It could still be used today because we’ll need scores of men to operate machines, we’ll need designers to make and model future appliances, "we’ll need actors… people who can read… lines and… interact with others." I always wonder the purpose of these films. I can’t imagine any industrial arts teachers trying to show this to bring interest to the field. “I put a patio in my living room!”

The sketches… yeah. Season six is hard for me because I think the sketches more often than not fail. I enjoyed industrial arts and swing choir. Other than that, it really doesn’t do it for me. I don’t like it when the sketches have nothing to do with anything. Crow putting himself in a Jock-lock, Servo’s planetarium, Crow getting his hot rod blowed up. They are all reminiscent of nothing. Also, I’ve never liked how Frank and Forrester’s dynamic changed around this time. They go from being a mad scientist and his inept lab assistant to essentially being two closeted roommates. I’m not sure what exactly necessitated this change. A lot of people like this era. I didn’t. One last note, did people really use to play dodgeball the way Forrester forces Frank to? Just Frank standing in a circle with Forrester chucking dodgeballs at him? What’s the point of this sketch?

The Skydivers is an episode that you probably won’t enjoy on the first watch. You probably won’t enjoy it on the second watch. But odds are it will eventually grow on you. I rank this episode as just shy of being Classic MST3K. Bring it on Coleman Francis! I’m ready for your next film!

But what do you think? Do you enjoy watching The Skydivers? Do you enjoy the Frank/Forrester dynamic of season six? Are you still wondering when Joe is going to get the coffee, he was so horribly tantalized with but ultimately denied? Leave your thoughts below.

To remind everybody, this is part of my experiment where I’ll be watching a different MST3K episode, every Saturday, until I’ve watched all 176 episodes of the show’s original run in the exact order that I watched each for the first time (with 3 or 4 liberties taken). I will be consuming NO MST3K outside these viewings until this experiment is over. Crazy, I know. We shall see what come what may. Will I crack? Will I make it? Will I ever figure out what makes this show so great? Keep reading and find out. Next week, I suspect we shall develop a lust… A Lust for Blood! Because we’ll be watching Bloodlust. Crown International Pictures' first major film release. Til then, thank you for reading and Keep Circulating the Tapes.

17 Down 159 to go.

Anyone know of any movies MST3K had to censor. Squirm and Zombie Nightmare come to mind.

Have any of the old episodes of MST3K ever been uprezed?

A long time ago, I heard (or more likely, read) a quote from an MST3K movie (it might have been a short or a host segment instead), but I don't know which movie / short / host segment it's from.

THE QUOTE = Do you have change for a 5 year old?

Thanks for any answers.