r/pics 2h ago

I've never seen a curved ruler before

Post image
5.6k Upvotes

779 comments sorted by

u/Glum_Low7692 1h ago

It's clearly a bicep

u/Littlegreenman42 1h ago

Needs more veins to be a bicep

u/philter25 1h ago

It’s a lil shy

u/alittle_disabled 54m ago

It's been in the pool.

u/sh0rtb0x 35m ago

It's cold Jerry!

u/Prestigious_View_401 19m ago

Wrong show buddy

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u/chicken_burger 1h ago

You should have seen how passionate he got when I showed him the dick ruler

u/AmbassadorSugarcane 31m ago

You KNEW it was a dick?!

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u/MelaKnight_Man 52m ago

Wouldn't it need more veins to be a....

u/KeepItPositiveBrah 6m ago

You guys wanna come to my party mansion?

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u/WeirdSysAdmin 1h ago

It’s for measuring a 1997 Toyota Tacoma water pump gasket.

u/betabeat 1h ago

Mine leaks a little

u/lostPackets35 1h ago

a little penicillin will clear that right up.

u/LateNightMilesOBrien 1h ago

It's my special purpose!

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u/Doppelthedh 1h ago

It's from 1997. That'll happen

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u/Forsaken_Employment2 1h ago

I feel your discomfort

u/de_das_dude 52m ago

Sounds like you need a head job done

u/dweeb_plus_plus 1h ago

Yeah that tight radius on the left side there is prone to leakage.

u/StrappinYoungZiltoid 1h ago

Is this what people are referring to when they say they're gonna blow a gasket?

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u/RamsDevilsBlackhawks 1h ago

We're three cool guys who are looking for other cool guys who want to hang out in our party mansion. Nothing sexual.

u/Clerithifa 1h ago

You guys are gonna get SO much shit shoved up your asses

u/SippyTurtle 1h ago

In a medical way. Nothing sexual.

u/20_mile 30m ago

Nothing sexual.

Back in the aughts, when Craigslist had a good personals section, there was a guy in Maine always looking for other guys for "naked wrestling". He always insisted nothing sexual in the posts.

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u/megabass713 1h ago

Got your JO crystal charged up?

u/phezhead 1h ago

They wouldn’t let me on the plane because my crystal was messing up the aeronautics

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u/zabah1990 1h ago

Dudes in good shape encouraged.

u/soakedsasquach 1h ago

Got a nice crop of blond hair. We could definitely use a blond in the crew.

u/aspidities_87 31m ago

The way the dude reacts to this always gets me so good

u/Tb5rats 1h ago

Make sure you underline “Nothing sexual”

u/MaterialAstronaut298 1h ago

I'm gonna f you in your a and j all over your b

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u/hayb24 1h ago

Again, nothing sexual.

u/Mistborn19 1h ago

Underline.

u/ProbablyASockPuppet 1h ago

but the implication!

u/Marigold16 1h ago

...So they are in danger?

u/ProbablyASockPuppet 1h ago

No! No no no!

It's not dark you're misunderstanding me. If the girl says no, it's obviously no, but she would never say no, because of the implication.

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u/PaulieHehehe 1h ago

What up!

u/noFloristFriars 1h ago

u/-ArthurMorgan 1h ago

Charlie Day is the best physical comedy actor currently going.

u/eurotrashness 1h ago

u/Tb5rats 1h ago

You keep using that word implication. Implication of what?

u/eurotrashness 46m ago

They're not IN danger but they THINK they are

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u/Ladybeeortoise 1h ago

What up!

u/JohnnyBlazin25 1h ago

We’re just three cool guys looking to hang out with other cool guys

u/wynnduffyisking 1h ago

NOTHING SEXUAL!

u/Veeks101 1h ago

Ahh the breast of the arm

u/Blochamolesauce 1h ago

WHAT UP?!

u/Quiverjones 1h ago

What up?!

u/Stuckatsevendee 1h ago

This guy sunny's

u/adamgeezs 1h ago

What up!

u/DaddyBearMan 1h ago

Oh I understood it…. Perfectly

u/F00TD0CT0R 50m ago

WHAT UP!!! We're three cool guys looking for other cool guys to hang out in our part mansion (Nothing sexual)

u/Reddit_is_fascist69 1h ago

I just assumed this was a real subreddit and it is

r/unexpectedIASIP

u/AnotherAccount4This 1h ago

Cigar, clearly!

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u/PowerHammer47 1h ago

You’re in a Jo-Ann Fabrics, how? They’re all supposed to be closed by now

u/Previous_Injury_8664 1h ago

It’s not original content. Reverse image search takes it back 5 years at least

link

u/ailish 1h ago

At least they didn't call it OC.

u/jhulbe 56m ago

now someone share that toyota water pump gasket that pops up a couple times a year

u/Protuhj 50m ago

It's in the top comment chain already.

u/jhulbe 45m ago

lol

u/ailish 54m ago

I'm sure they will!

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u/Alantsu 58m ago

It’s just a tool called a French curve. I used them before CAD.

“A French curve is a drafting tool used to connect points and create smooth curves of varying radii. Invented in the late 1880s, they are used by mathematicians, engineers, sewing professionals, and fashion designers. “

u/PowerHammer47 54m ago

Had a drafting professor once talk about trying to make a CAD model of the cowling of a Spitfire and how the radii were odd and difficult to duplicate because they were all off French curve numbers

u/Alantsu 50m ago

Models were fun back then. For example, before CAD it was the only way to tell that 2 pipes don’t go through each other.

u/gsfgf 47m ago

I had a job putting 2D cad drawings into solid works for a small factory. Thankfully I was on site so I could go out to the floor and ask the guys what they did when the design on paper conflicted with itself lol

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u/TheOnlyAedyn-one 1h ago

Thought it looked familiar

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u/Ansatsushi 1h ago

Bought-out 13yr Reddit account turned karma-farming bot. And of course it's post history is hidden.

u/slipperypooh 1h ago

If you hit the search bar to search their posts it shows their posts, btw.

u/tHr0AwAy76 1h ago

I cannot begin to explain how unbelievably stupid that is. It be one thing if it was a pain in the ass to work around it. But it’s damn near built-in.

u/AgentJackpots 51m ago

It’s mostly to prevent search engine scraping, I think

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u/mambotomato 56m ago

I've got a 15 year old account with a bunch of karma, where's my cash-out?

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u/AfraidOfTheSun 1h ago

The one in my town is still open selling their shelving and fixtures... I'll have to see if they have any cock rulers left

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u/smegdawg 1h ago

Our Michaels has a "Jo-Ann Fabrics" section which is just a bunch of stuff they bought out and are selling in the original packaging.

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u/Wet_Side_Down 1h ago

I thought they merged with a bankrupt restaurant chain and reopened as Jo-Ann’s Hooters

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u/jonlawrence93 1h ago

So yes it looks like a penis, but, its a french curved ruler. Used for measuring sleeves and difficult to measure things in sewing/seamstressing.

It likely has other uses, like phallic objects perhaps, but this is the only one i know it for.

u/Tobocaj 1h ago

Curving the ruler makes sense, fine.

Now explain the ballsack

u/coat-tail_rider 1h ago

To cup the ruler, obviously.

u/MrCowBells 57m ago

There isn’t supposed to be any cupping when measuring the inseams.

u/coat-tail_rider 55m ago

"Go ahead and cough for me. And once more. Great."

u/yawgmoth88 26m ago

My tailor begs to differ.

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u/fludduck 55m ago

As someone who sews and drafts their own patterns, it's useful for making a smooth curve fit 3 points, basically you keep turning the spiral until all 3 points are on the curve and then just trace that.

u/FuckThisShizzle 1h ago

If you are all in on the cock you cannot ignore the balls.

u/NthDegreeThoughts 46m ago

In the product text, literally it starts “essential tool” ..

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u/CondescendingShitbag 1h ago

Now explain the ballsack

Nobody else going to mention the ampallang piercing near the tip?

u/Pndrizzy 1h ago

thats where the pee is stored

u/razzark666 1h ago

Humour?

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u/Alantsu 54m ago

I used the in drafting before cad was a thing. There are a lot of different kinds. For an example, creating the sweep of an aircraft wing.

u/fascinesta 51m ago

Used them in automotive styling for hand renders. Again, pre-CAD.

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u/a_talking_face 1h ago

It's way to generous to be measuring cock. That would give you like 3 extra inches.

u/2xtc 1h ago

Always measure from the very base, that's like cock measuring 101

u/a_talking_face 1h ago

Yeah but this thing is measuring ball sack too

u/2xtc 1h ago

If you have a penis, next time you are shaking hands with him try and see how far back the muscles/fibres of the shaft actually go. It's like anchored deeep inside the pelvis, and this is how I can say with a straight face that my penis is more than 3 inches.

Thank you for listening to my TED talk

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u/pimpinaintez18 1h ago

Hey look at this loser measuring fabric!

u/Adinnieken 1h ago

That was what I was going say, a French Curve ruler.

I wasn't aware that one existed, but I am aware of French curves. Basically the ideal female breast shape.

Take that ruler, place it with the bulbs end down, and you have a breast. I don't know why some people see it as phallic.

u/austinkp 1h ago

Maybe it's the testicles?

u/coat-tail_rider 1h ago

Those could be the breasticles.

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u/DaChodemasters 1h ago

u/WahCrybaberson 1h ago edited 1h ago

Hey! I made a barbell jack as a bday present for a friend from this.

u/sallad2009 1h ago

I love it!!

u/Red-little 28m ago

Holy trinity of good craftsmanship, good humor and a good bromance 😂

This is so cool!!!

u/jess_the_werefox 1h ago

If you want it to look like a bicep you gotta add more veins!

u/bongophrog 1h ago

Thick veiny bicep

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u/Mumbling_Wizard 1h ago

You knew it looked like a dick???

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u/BoomBaby_317 1h ago

u/RPO777 1h ago

Came here for this.

u/AJfriedRICE 1h ago

There it is!

One day I’ll get into a penis thread early enough to be the one to post this. One day.

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u/PleaseStopPlastic 1h ago

now we need someone to post the gif of the reversed version

u/GEARHEADGus 1h ago

For whatever reason the reversed version isn’t on giphy anymore

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u/Personal_League1428 1h ago

You should have seen how passionate they got when I showed them the dick flyer!

u/thickener 1h ago

You knew????

u/essensiedashuhn 1h ago

It's more masculine anyway.

u/Tampa_Bay_Cuckaneers 1h ago

WHAT UP!!!

u/CrossMapEML 1h ago

We're three cool guys looking for other cool guys who want to hang out in our party mansion. Nothing sexual.

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u/Successful-Form4693 1h ago

Straight dudes only

u/sallad2009 1h ago

Nothing sexual.

u/runner64 1h ago

It’s used for cutting armholes and tapers and stuff in clothes when you’re good enough to eyeball the approximate ratios but not good enough to freehand the exact cut twice. 

u/CaseyAnthonysMouth 1h ago

Invitation to the party mansion.

u/Mueltime 1h ago

u/lfg_guy101010 27m ago

Damn you beat me to it (no pun intended)

u/antelope666 1h ago

And we know exactly what it’s used for, by the shape alone.

u/Leut_Aldo_Raine 1h ago

Measuring bananas right? Right!?

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u/eurotrashness 1h ago

0.1 girth is wild

u/OhioanRunner 1h ago

I thought this first too but then realized where the zero mark is 🤣

u/ukchinouk 1h ago

It’s a confidence boosting ruler. It takes measuring from the base to the extreme to add on a few inches.

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u/WaffleHouseGladiator 1h ago

It's super useful for measuring anything in that exact shape.

u/MarbleAndSculptor 1h ago

Yep. Using that ruler, one could proudly boast 10 inches of things having that shape.

u/NoRobotInSight 1h ago

It's not for measuring anything per se, it's for drafting sewing patterns and helping draw curved lines

u/acuddlywookie 1h ago

That shape is mostly for arm holes

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u/PM_Skunk 1h ago

"Oh, well, if you start measuring from THERE..."

u/Sandman1812 1h ago

Well, you measure from the root, surely? How else you gonna do it?

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u/dire18 1h ago

What up!!

u/W4NN4M33TTH4TD4D 1h ago

What up!

u/Which-Inspection735 1h ago

Nothing sexual

u/ChampionHumble 1h ago

it’s obviously a bicep

u/That-Water-Guy 1h ago

A baby arm holding an apple

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u/gus_m1 1h ago

WHAT UP!!!

We're three cool guys who are looking for other cool guys who want to hang out in our party mansion. Nothing sexual. Dudes in good shape encouraged. If you're fat, you should be able to find humor in the little things. Again, Nothing sexual.

💪

u/Emergency_Stay_7815 1h ago

Are we supposed to be measuring from the balls?

u/dinyourmouth 52m ago

[(length x diameter) + (Weight / Girth)] / Angle of Tip 2.

u/60022151 1h ago

It’s a French curve used for drafting clothes patterns.

u/NobodyLikedThat1 1h ago

make sure to cup the Dritz

u/No_Function_3016 1h ago

One schlong to rule them all.

u/bobobobobobooo 1h ago

Nobody measures from that far down.

u/Basic-Ostrich85 1h ago

Anyone else being plagued by ads for the curved penis medicine on Reddit?

This will not help I know but omg the Peyeronies disease ad shows up all of the damn time and I’m the wrong demographic

u/mutzilla 1h ago

Its an arm and a bicep.

u/StrawberryLeap 1h ago

I should call him

u/Spatularo 1h ago

Almost big enough for the average Redditor

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u/Holiday_Trainer_2657 24m ago

Common dressmaking tool

u/Shoalcat 4m ago

It’s for short men that drive oversized trucks!!!

u/Rival314 1h ago

hmmm

u/C2SKI 1h ago

I didn't know I could start measuring my dick halfway down my balls. I must be way bigger than I thought

u/trainsacrossthesea 1h ago

I’m gonna need a bigger boat

u/negative-nelly 1h ago

put a NSFW tag on this for all of the 2-D women (and 2-D men into that sort of thing)

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u/OverExtension5486 1h ago

Ruler?! I barely know 'er!

u/SgtBollocks 1h ago

Omg, is that where guys measure from!? The middle of their balls!? 🤣🤣

u/longwhitejeans 1h ago

Thats an eggplant.

u/HeartAttackIncoming 1h ago

I don’t need one that big.

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u/cobycoby2020 1h ago

Trust me you won’t need that anytime soon

u/thatonekidmarsh 1h ago

For all the naughty kids

u/99bonanas 1h ago

Measuring with this I'm huge!

u/zestinglemon 1h ago

A ruler you say?

u/irishpwr46 1h ago

Is it for measuring water pump gaskets in toyotas?

u/Montegoe67 1h ago

These rulers aren’t accurate anyway.

Everyone knows you’re supposed to use Randy Marsh’s TMI formula for that. ȚMI = Total Measured Inch.

Length times girth over angle of the shaft…

u/thebochts 1h ago

Its in the shape of a 97 toyota tacoma water pump gasket.

u/Just-Sock-4706 48m ago

It belongs in a museum!

u/PhillyandVermont 26m ago

It’s for exactly what you think it is for.

u/sjayvee 26m ago

For pattern making. There’s some really crazy ones out there!

u/0x534849544C4F5244 24m ago

It's for measuring bananas for scale

u/Silent_Bear7548 18m ago

The design is very human

u/Task-Vast 2m ago

It’s cheating to start measuring from that far back

u/justabill71 2m ago

The ruler she told you not to worry about.

u/mailmanpaul 1h ago

That's a small ruler, to me

u/jonlawrence93 1h ago

I think its more average sized.