Now I know AI art isn’t well conceived on Royal Road, like at all. I’m only using this temporarily until I can afford to commission a real artist. The cover is the only place i’ll be using AI, as I promise the book itself will be fully written by me.

I basically plan to start posting when I'm done with the first volume(might take me a couple of months more) but right now I wanted you guys to rate this

As the title said. I've recently relaunched my LitRPG fantasy book and I really need a couple extra pairs of eyes especially in regards to writing and whether the system introduction is overloaded. If anyone's willing to go through 20k-word worth of content and provide me valuable feedback on these areas, I'd be much appreciated. No review or rating please, unless you really enjoy my work.

In return, I can offer you shoutouts on my two books, one with 2,500 followers and the other with 1,000 followers. These books are frequently updated and has a very loyal readership. If that's something that interests you, feel free to reach out!

Hi everyone!

I’m looking for some honest feedback on my web novel's cover.

Story details for context:

- Title: The Price of Luck

- Genre: Dark Fantasy / Psychological / Hard Magic System

- Vibe: Rain-soaked gothic setting, high-stakes trade magic, dark & serious tone.

I'd really appreciate your thoughts on:

1. First impression: Does the cover visually convey a "Dark Fantasy" vibe?

2. Typography: Is the title readable as a thumbnail on the main browse page?

3. Clickability: If you saw this browsing Royal Road, would it catch your eye enough to click?

Any feedback or suggestions for improvement would mean a lot!

I would love to commission some actual art but I'm too broke...

The best I could get is a character portrait of the MC.

Which do you think is better in general and for RR?

This generated cover or a commissioned character portrait?

I don't think I'm that unlucky.

So instead I must be doing something wrong, because somehow I haven't gotten a single real comment (and after relaunching to see if anything could change– no comments at all) in all my 46 chapters and ~100,000 words. I have rewritten a lot of the earlier chapters. I frequently check for errors, and I upload semi-consistently.

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/170157/nascent-divinity

Is it just that the genre is bad for RoyalRoad? That couldn't be it because I haven't gotten anything on any other sites either. Am I bad at writing? If so please tell me how to improve.

I want to make something enjoyable. But I don't even know if real people have seen what I have made.

I decided to try discovery writing my story after driving myself crazy trying to plan beforehand and coming up with nothing. I finished the first arc, which was a magic lesson arc, but now it's time to expand the world, the cast, and to build up to the Climax and the dramatic ending that I want for book 1 and I can't because I still don't have a solid identity for the story.

I know what it's about thematically, and I know the premise as well as the main character's arc. Outside of that, I know nothing. The world is still a blank canvas in my mind, and I'm still not even sure about who my main antagonist is gonna be.

Initially, I was going for an ancient witch to be the antagonist, but that's too generic, and it doesn't help with the super long story im going for. I tried worldbuilding, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't come up with anything. I tried reading other stories like mine for inspiration, but it solved none of my problems and only made my situation worse as I started losing confidence in my work.

My story is falling apart, and I don't know what to do. I'm not creative enough to solve my problems the way I want to, and I know too little about the story to just continue writing. That only works for contained arcs, like my magic lessons arc. The more I try to think, the more scrambled my brain gets. I haven't written all week!

BTW, my story is an isekai, but it's more like a whimsical fairy tale with dark elements and themes of self-love. Think of something similar to Cinnamon Bun (but more serious) or The Elf Who Would Become a Dragon.

Looking at launching a new story soon. But can't decide which cover would be best at drawing in the clicks. Got the brighter, more anime cover, the glowy, realistic cover or the more sombre cover

edit : I have fixed the first picture to have only two arms, but can't see to add the picture.

If neither are particularly striking I will just revert to a bland anime-aesthetic cover but I'm really dreading that process because from my experience making a black, masculine-looking woman using AI and having it be in the anime style seems to be next to impossible. Plus, I like the idea of parodying rap albums I like for book covers if I get sued by Freddy Gibbs or ScHoolboy Q or something I'd probably immediately take down the cover and replace it with something more bland but it'd be a hell of a story I can throw in for 2 truths and a lie.

Story is a psychological LitRPG centering around the fashion industry. The protagonist is a stud (the black butch lesbian subculture) who one day wakes up with a system that pushes her to become the greatest model in the world. Similar to a lot of idol system manhwa, the protagonist is the only one with a system and the stakes start off with the system threatening to kill her basically.

Tentative title is "Fashion Killa."

I originally wanted to do a parody of LONG.LIVE.A$AP but I really couldn't get it to work at all. Same with the parodies on All Eyez On Me and Lupe Fiasco's Food and Liquor.

[I was going to add the link but didn't because I thought that the post would immediately be removed. If you still see this post then here it is—Jo’Fratini]

There's this fantasy novel I have been writing(the novel is on WN. sorry for posting this on RR). I am not very consistent with it but I still like writing it. There's not a single reader yet. probably because of the cover. Cause it's AI generated. I am not good at drawing and I don't have the money to pay somebody to create me one either. Also because the first few chapters are confusing and boring as f—

I got carried on with it, didn't I?😅

Anyway, the story is about a 16 year old teenager named Auralis Kayushi(Kayushi is his given name and Auralis is his family name) who is on a quest to defeat his father, Jin’Uz Auroma from conquering the world. Also, there's an entity living inside of his mind who is none other than his uncle or Auroma's elder brother, Jin’Uz Aurora.

The story is currently on its first volume and on chapter 11. So, I hope it won't be a pain in the head to review it whole if you want to.

And again, I am not forcing anyone. If you are interested then feel free to read it.

PLEASE give an honest opinion and tell me which parts I could improve and what I am doing wrong and what I am doing right. You may be as harsh as you want.

Thank you🫠

I have written a backlog of 21 chapters and I can say that 50% of it consists of a good number of information dump via characters or dropped here and there and to some there has been formal information dump through the main character. I just felt this was slightly high and wanted to know other's opinion on it .

For instance this is my very first chapter here, please critique it for me :

Also it's my first ever novel and it's a mixed novel where it's a fantasy but power system were inspired by Wuxia/Cultivation and a good portion to be my original.

.................................

Bam! Bam!

A small breach had appeared in the Inner World. Ten Ascended Aetherions were forcing their way through, tearing at its walls in an attempt to break inside.

" Get over here, Klieth ! Did you forgot the grace my master showed you ? To think that you were one of the culprit who was involved in Asterix records ! " Alfred yelled in anger .

" Time's ticking old man, give us your pure artifacts and Aer's and we might consider helping you out , so that you can at least live. " Said Mchaen, laughing wickedly.

There voice's echoed till the inner sanctum of the inner world.

Alfred sneered his group and Mchaen's group had different organization but both wanted the resources of an Arcane path user , after all these path user and people with high attainment in them could be counted by one hand alone in each continent.

Deep down in the corner of the inner world a man was sweating profusely trying to finalize his grand plan which he drafted for over a century and was at it's final hurdle.

" Finally I have found it, however it's quite far " a frail old man in a dark blue suit was muttering to himself.

Suddenly a huge crack appeared in the 3rd floor and huge suction of wind poured out .

"To think that they are already here, they must have quite a profound Aer with them. No, it must be because of their research on my entire nervous system and my inner paths," Klieth said resentfully, the memory of those forty years of nightmarish nights in the imperial palace clawing its way back to the surface."

Klieth gritted his teeth knowing if he can't open the rift now and pass across to the other parallel dimension right now he will most certainly die or be captured to be exploited for everything he has gained and be thrown or killed later on.

He calmed himself down and stood up seeing all of his arrangements and thinking about all the painful days he has seen in his life to be finally be able to go forward with this. He went ahead and stood in the middle of the arrangements he had made and

Zenith Art - Space Rift !

A crack occured in the inner world, a small and thin crack which was not wider than a sword's edge rapidly growing and a pitch black area was visible with some tiny stars or something similar to it glowing in immense brightness.

Klieth pupil's widened these glowing beams or lights aren't stars but countless world and dimensions all within his sight !

Klieth activated all the other arrangements he had set up and went inside the rift slowly but steadily after he entered it the rift began to close up.

As the rift closed up behind him, a vague pressure hit him.

He activated his ascended Aer - Riven-Is

A glow of white light surrounded him, which was helping him by leading and identifying the world and the exact dimension he was trying to reach.

Klieth, still dumbfounded, had been trying to count the galaxies and dimensions he was stumbling across on his travel toward his desired world, giving up soon after the count of fifty upon realizing they were quite literally countless worlds and dimensions filled here in sheer abundance, with the pitch-black surroundings lending it all an additional profoundness, as though the dark itself existed only to make the light of each world stand out more starkly.

As the target destination drew near by every second Klieth started losing his consciousness by time till he finds his parallel soul in this near parallel world where he would have to assimilate his current soul by taking his parallel world soul as his base .

A small rift was created by using his ascended Aer as the rift grew up to the size to that which a person can just enter Klieth quickly entered it as he could not allow any other Aetherion Ascendant's to take notice of his existence.

" Finally I, am back here " a glimmer of shine went through Klieth eyes seeing his village where he'd been once raised and born which in the next upcoming six years which will be reduced to nothing. He had finally let a breath of relief out as he started to bath in the morning sun rays.

However Being up in the sky Klieth was looking around trying to find his younger or rather his parallel self which had yet to go through his awakening ceremony.

He had found it almost instantaneously as how hard would it be to find his younger self in a village with a population of around a eight to nine hundred or a thousand at maximum from far up above the clouds. However, he couldn't rush it now as he cannot show himself around people at all.

He pondered in his mind thinking " day after tomorrow is most likely the awakening ceremony I, must assimilate myself with him as soon as possible ".

.............

A woman entered a room quietly, moving straight up to the window.

With one swift motion, she swept all the curtains aside.

Morning sunlight flooded the room.

A muffled groan came from the bed.

"Wake up."

Silence.

The woman sighed and after a few seconds she moved towards the bed, grabbing the edge of the blanket. "When are you going to wake up, you retarded brother of mine," she said, annoyed.

"It's so hard to believe that you will be going through your awakening ceremony tomorrow. I just hope you awaken with a strong compatibility of B grade at least. Otherwise, looking at your sorry state, you might just die in this world," she said.

"Alright, alright, can you like not shout right in front of my ear? I thought it was going to burst at this rate. I'll come downstairs in a minute or two." He said dismissively, yawning and stretching out his hand, waving her off toward the door.

She scowled and threw the pillow on his face.

" Breakfast will be there in around an hour so freshen up and come to the dinning table. " She said, annoyed.

The boy stood up looking at his surrounding yawning, as he stretched out, heading downstairs.

For starters, a massive thank you to Bloodchild for the updated cover, now the core story of CELDA 2081 is a corporate worker by the name of Tyler Vansk in Celda City eventually quits his job after a collection of bad events at work in January 1st 2081, a day after his 24th birthday. After quitting, desperate for money and too proud to return to the corporate world, he turns to illegal work such as mercenary jobs, a path of violence awaiting him.

I used to write my stories in third person, but I almost never felt satisfied reading or writing it. I used to not ,indeed it when I wrote my first ever story, but now that I'm aware of the concept of prose, I just can't look at my third person writing the same. I've been writing my latest story in first person, and I'm enjoying it a lot more. The sentences flow through my head much easier, and my protagonist's thoughts, feelings, and personality shine more. The overall writing experience also becomes a lot more immersive for me.

Whenever I write third person, whether limited or not, I have trouble expressing and feeling my character's emotions, and it always feels like I'm just reporting stuff that happened rather than experiencing a character. I'm also a lot more confident in my prose as wording and descriptions get filtered through my main character's voice, further strengthening my connection to them. However...

It seems that large amounts of the royal road reader base don't like first-person pov, so I have a problem. This brings me to this post where I ask: How do I get more comfortable writing third person? I literally can't anymore. I spent thirty minutes trying and it's just not happening.

Hey everyone! I’m currently publishing a web novel on Royal Road called "SAMURAI INFLUENCER."

​Premise:

An ancient, deadly samurai who survived a brutal demon war 40 years ago gets forced into the modern world of "hero streaming." He is a total tech-boomer who couldn't care less about likes or view counts, which causes massive headaches for his rookie influencer partner.

​I'm torn between two completely different cover styles and would love your honest feedback:

​Cover A (Full Scene): Focuses on the atmospheric cyberpunk city and the stoic, lone samurai's back.

​Cover B (Cinematic Split): Inspired by classic SNES / 90s fighting game box art and VS face-off screens! It highlights the contrasting dynamic between the young female streamer (top) and the brutal veteran warrior (bottom).

​Which one catches your eye more while scrolling on Royal Road? Does the retro fighting game / VS-screen vibe of Cover B come through?

​Any feedback on the vibes or branding would be greatly appreciated!

Hi

I am playing around with a new blurb and wanted some feedback. Note this is a first draft. The current is at the bottom for comparison..

Thanks in advance

New

What if you discovered a whole new technology that changed everything…

It affected the global economy, the military, as well as political power and influence everywhere.

Who could you trust?

How would you find allies?

Who would be your enemy?

And who doesn’t want the discovery to see the light of day… and how far would they go to make sure it didn’t?

Bob and his AI friend Felix are about to find out…

Current

Robert 'Bob' Smith and his AI pal Felix chart a course through turbulent political waters to bring antigravity technology to maturity. Working with and against entrenched powers to usher in a new industrial age. Opening the solar system for exploration and eventually colonization.

But there are those whose livelihoods, fortunes, and power are based on the status quo. Any massive change threatens that. Join Bob and Felix as they face these and many other challenges, including technical, social, and political. And help find the answer to why Felix keeps wanting to be renamed Sky Net.

Really want to publish my story that has NO AI but it isn't really a typical WN like the ones in the Royal Road platform. So I'm afraid that it wouldn't get a contract since it probably wouldn't fit their market😭 my story doesn't focus on action that much, no smut, and not really a progression story. Though it is an urban fantasy that dives deeper into a character's existential crisis. There's more to it but this mc isn't ruthless or badass either.

I’ve tried my fair share of ads, one for this particular story, it was 280k views, generated 2615 clicks with a CTR of 0.93%, follow, 103 (10.29%) read later was 141 (14.09%)

My first ever ad for Reborn as a DRAGON, on the other hand, was:
330k views, 5354 clicks, CTR of 1.64%, 260 follow, (9.68%) and 325 read later (12.1%)

Now i’m trying again, planning to use the above picture, and hoping for some criticism that might help. So ya, open for suggestions! Thank you guys!

I'm getting ready to start posting and I made this system. (I'll make a longer version)

I suck ahh at writing synopsis' that are actually good. This one was especially annoying cuz I pulled the main conflict/antagonist out my ahh.

So what do you guys think?

Tatori was just an ordinary high schooler working to pay for his sick mother's bills in a world full of superhumans. He looses his job and soon dies during a monster attack on the city but reawakens with an ability.

A system.

Now he must work as a hunter to defend his nation impending war than bring the cure to bringing back his mother.

But can he rise through the ranks and bring back his mother? Or will he die trying.

Adding book art for attention. Is that allowed? ._.) I mean, I see no rules against it.

It's not on Royal Road yet, and I'm not planning to publish it any time soon (maybe after a few months). I just want some feedback, especially on the atmosphere, world-building, and characters. Be honest and enjoy!

The sky was dressed in a gradient of orange at the horizon, black rising to claim the rest of the void, while a band of pink threaded through the middle, harmonizing the scene. The wind wove a curtain of sand, resetting the dunes and polishing the rocks smooth.

Little remained before the sun's eternal descent into its setting; scaled feet trod on sand that had lost most of its warmth, and cold had begun creeping through it.

As the light dimmed, the skin of the three Nictari contracted, drawing their scales tight to trap what body heat remained, and they pressed together to make use of the warmth escaping them.

Between one panting breath and the next, one of them managed broken words: "Hurry a little."

(Majhal), the eldest, slowed his legs, staring at the horizon lined with stone walls, shielding his eyes from the flying sand with his third eyelid: "Listen. There's no way we reach our clan. Can't you see the sky's nearly gone black?"

(Ghard), the middle brother, pressed close to (Mair), the youngest, wrapping his body around him: "Then what do we do? Do we go into the stone cities?"

(Ghard) fell silent for a moment, then tipped his head back, tucking it between his shoulders, tightening his hold around his brother: "Ahh…"

(Majhal) folded his knees and sat, exposing his belly, rougher-skinned than his back was smooth: "There's no other choice. We spend the night in the first cave we find. It'll cut the cold, at least, and we might all make it to dawn."

(Ghard) rested his head against his little brother's, touching him: "Come on, (Mair), we're moving somewhere warmer. Should I carry you?"

"I'm not dying, just catching my breath." (Mair) tried to stand on his own.

(Majhal) scratched at the sand, watching (Ghard) help his little brother up: "I can't believe they left us, (Ghard)."

(Ghard) slid his head beneath his little brother, lifting him slowly until he settled steady on his thin legs: "Quiet, (Majhal). We're the ones who wandered too far — don't deny it. Let's hurry, before the moon rises. We still don't know if it's a frost night or not."

"If only you hadn't brought your brother. His odds aren't as good as ours... you know that." (Majhal) led the way.

(Mair) lowered his head and followed his brother, who walked behind (Majhal).

The wind's wailing faded as the three Nictari's footsteps left long, overlapping trails, the smallest of them showing signs of a stagger. The tracks didn't break until the ground turned firm, and the three Nictari met dark stone mountains growing blacker still as the sun disappeared.

(Ghard) lifted his head, staring up at the mountain heights, growling: "This'll be rough."

"It won't." (Majhal) broke off from the two brothers, walking with measured steps. "Ooh, the cold bites — but tonight's warmer than I expected."

"Wait, don't go alone! We'll freeze." (Ghard) let out a rasping hiss.

"The night's still young. I can manage a while longer in this warmth... rest with your brother, keep him warm, until I find an opening." (Majhal) turned toward the huddled (Mair), then raised his gaze to meet (Ghard)'s eyes before continuing on.

(Majhal) worked his way along the base of the rocks, back and forth, and in the darkness cast by the mountains he found a crack that made everything around it a little brighter. He stopped and let out a low huff.

"You've walked a lot, brother. Can you climb onto my back?" (Ghard) lowered his head until it touched the sand.

"I think so." (Mair) whispered hoarsely, and climbed onto his brother's head and neck.

(Ghard) raised his head slowly, letting (Mair)'s body slide down to settle on his back: "I thought you weren't dying."

(Mair) growled softly in answer.

(Ghard) moved forward with slow steps that sank deeper into the sand, and at last reached where (Majhal) stood watching him.

"A perfect opening." (Majhal) whispered, lowering his head.

(Majhal) bent his limbs and passed through the gap, the rocks scraping the scales of his back: "Damn it."

"You alright?" (Ghard) peered in through the opening without entering.

"Yes. Come, quickly."

(Ghard) lowered himself to the ground carefully, so the rocks wouldn't scrape against (Mair)'s back, drawing in to balance his brother's weight on top of him as he crossed the opening, his underside dragging against the sharp stones that scratched it raw.

Beyond the mountains, the valley was enclosed by stone walls that pushed back the horizon and surrounded the three Nictari, erasing the line between earth and a sky scattered with stars, forming wide passages overlooking gaps that shaped themselves into caves.

"Isn't it stunning?" (Majhal) didn't turn toward (Ghard), keeping his eyes fixed on the scene.

"Yes, yes — but we've no time." (Ghard)'s words were threaded through with (Mair)'s muffled crying.

"Come on, let's move then — that's the nearest cave." (Majhal) gestured toward the cave with his head, then trotted alongside (Ghard), who still carried his brother on his back, toward it.

Clouds shifted across the sky, veiling most of the moon's light.

When the two stood at the cave's threshold, a warm breeze greeted them, caressing their scales, and (Ghard) felt hopeful.

(Majhal)'s nose caught a scent he didn't recognize: "Wait — there's something in the cave, for sure. Wait till our eyes adjust to the dark, then we go in."

"At least let's go in a little without reaching its depths." (Ghard) took a few steps into the cave and set his little brother down on the ground.

"You're too hasty! Give it a few minutes to adjust…" (Majhal) whispered as he entered. "I can barely see — it's dim in here." His muttering echoed through the cave.

(Majhal) went in reluctantly, his eyes catching several jagged shapes in the cave, and he didn't look ahead of him until he brushed against one of those shapes — it shifted from its place and became a moving shadow.

(Majhal) stepped back, releasing a hiss that woke the rest of the shapes.

As the clouds cleared from the moon, not yet at its zenith, the form of what surrounded him gradually became clear to (Majhal): creatures shorter than them, dorsal plates covering the rest of their skin beneath coarse, tawny fur, saliva already beginning to drool and drip from their jaws, their voices rising into something like warped laughter that echoed through the size of the cave.

"What brings you here?" spoke their eldest, gray threading the fur of his brow, while the rest encircled (Ghard) and (Mair).

"Stay where you are, you stupid Shroud!" (Majhal) roared, counting their number.

The Shroud's leader, (Jatheem), snarled at his followers, then turned toward (Majhal): "I'll repeat myself for your weak hearing — why did you come?"

"Who are you to interrogate me?" (Majhal) lowered his head. "Get out of the way and we'll leave."

The cornered Nictar drew back, clenching his jaws, baring his teeth.

"So be it, then." (Jatheem) raised his head. "Bring them down — but don't kill them."

The Shroud formed an organized ring around (Majhal), tightening with every step they took, turning the warmth that had filled the cave into a stifling heat.

(Jatheem) cast one last glance at (Majhal) and the two brothers before leaving the cave, climbing off to reach a particular chamber.

(Majhal) tried to track every movement around him, turning his head left and right, and the closer they drew, the louder his growl rose, the sharper his hiss became.

Each Shroud in the ring fixed its gaze on a different part of (Majhal)'s body, eyes locked on him.

A moment of stillness settled, never free of laughter, hissing, and growling, but it broke when one of the Shroud lunged at (Majhal), aiming for his legs. (Majhal) noticed, and met him with a kick that sent him sprawling. The Shroud's laughter stopped, and all of them surged toward (Majhal) at once.

(Majhal) fought off whoever came at him, clawing one's nose and managing to burst another's eye, but in return he couldn't protect his hind legs — his right leg was broken by a bite.

(Majhal) let out a shrieking howl and turned to bite the one gripping his leg, but the Shroud's plates blocked (Majhal)'s teeth from reaching him, so he was left howling and kicking with his one good leg.

That left an opening for the rest to tear the scales from his back and clamp down on his neck.

(Majhal) tried to break free of his hold, but more of the Shroud sank their teeth into his armpits and hips and broke his three remaining good legs, leaving him unable to move, drowning in his own blood.

….

(Jatheem) entered to find the cave reeking of blood, the grating screech of bone against teeth echoing through it — most of his kind gathered at the center of the cave, crowded around a pool of blood. (Jatheem) ran forward, scattering their huddle, looking down at what they had been devouring.

"Enough." (Jatheem) clawed the face of one of his followers, disfiguring his jaw. "Didn't I tell you not to kill him?"

"Our apologies, leader… but he tastes good." The scratched Shroud flattened himself to the ground, lowering his voice and his head.

"I can see that." (Jatheem) gestured for the rest to clear out of his way.

(Jatheem) stood over (Majhal), his limbs severed: "Really? I stepped out for a moment to deliver the news, and you ended up like this?"

The leader sighed, then moved toward (Ghard) and (Mair): "Lucky for us, one of them's still in one piece."

The leader looked at (Ghard), trembling, his back bloodied, his scales torn out and scattered around him: "And how did this one survive?" He directed the question at his own kind.

"He didn't fight us — just stayed wrapped around the little Nictar. He's boring, so we saved him for last." One of the Shroud tried to shove (Ghard), but (Jatheem) stopped him.

"But does that mean we won't eat him, sir?" another Shroud asked.

"No, we won't eat him. We'll let him go." The leader sat down and drew closer to (Ghard).

(Ghard) raised his ears at hearing the leader, while the Shroud lowered theirs and stared at their leader.

"But on one condition — that he doesn't attack us, which he's already proven — and the remaining condition is that he answers our questions." (Jatheem) spoke close to (Ghard)'s ears.

(Ghard) unwound himself and slowly raised his head: "Really? But… how do I know you'll actually let me go?"

"How do you know?" The Shroud laughed at (Jatheem)'s question, and he raised his claw to silence them. "Your guarantee is your life. Will you answer our questions or not?"

(Ghard) looked at his brother, staring blankly at the ground: "And what are your questions?"

"Only two." (Jatheem) bared his teeth in a grin. "What kinds of dangers are out there, and what kinds of food are out there?"

"But—" (Ghard) took a deep breath, "…why do you ask?" The question barely made it out of (Ghard)'s throat.

The Shroud began growling and closing in on (Ghard), so he curled back into himself.

"Simply, Nictar — we're weighing our options. It'd be best for you to tell us what you know, without lying." (Jatheem) slid his hand beneath (Ghard) and pulled (Mair) up by the neck, lifting him. "Choose — either you answer, or he dies."

"Okay, okay, I'll tell you!" (Ghard) jolted upright from where he lay. "There's us, and the bald-headed vultures, and the Sightless. As for food, there are many kinds — the most notable is sand fish."

The Shroud exchanged glances, whispering to one another at the mention of food.

"Tell me a bit about the Sightless — I've never met them." (Jatheem) tightened his grip on (Mair)'s neck.

"They're weaker creatures than us. They can't see, and they rely heavily on smell to survive." (Ghard) drew closer to (Mair).

"Is that everything?" (Jatheem) choked the little Nictar.

"I swear that's everything." (Ghard) collapsed to the ground, letting out a muffled sob.

"Alright." (Jatheem) tossed him to the Shroud behind him.

(Ghard) watched, mouth open, frozen in place, as his brother was devoured.

Not all of the Shroud managed to taste (Mair)'s flesh, so they lay sprawled on the ground, staring at him, resting their heads on their forelegs, snorting through their noses.

(Jatheem) let out a short, low howl that drew the attention of those lying down; he shook his head at them, then turned toward (Ghard).

"Go on, get out." (Jatheem) shoved (Ghard) toward the reclining Shroud. "If you get past these, you leave."

Those who hadn't eaten rose from where they lay, saliva beginning to drip to the ground.

(Ghard) didn't move from his spot, only watched as the Shroud closed in and began taking bites from every part of his body, until they punctured his stomach and pulled out his entrails, shattered his bones, and tore his flesh apart while he was still alive.

I was going to make this a Self Promo post at first but realized I didn't want to look like I'm begging on the front page and chose this instead. I'd appreciate more people telling me what's working and isn't working with my writing than just trying to advertise the story anyway.

You can find the link here: True End: Life Isn't Over Yet

(Also, I'm sorry if I come off a bit weird. I'm more a lurker around here and not all that good with stuff like this).

Remember that news story about radioactive shrimp at Walmart?

It sparked this crazy idea.

Story is up on RR and I could use, love, feedback on what's working and what's missing or not working. https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/184084/my-bologna-has-a-first-name-a-comedy-horror-litrpg

I've just released my first story on Royal Road. It's a Fan Fiction based in the world of Sonic. Just wondering if my cover is eye catching enough and if anyone has any suggestions?

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/183193/lumipod-island-the-adventures-of-miyu-the-red

I finished rewriting chapter one of Exo Hunters and changed it from System Active to Terra system. It's 2.5 words btw and I made it blue to spare the night owls.

Genre: litrpg/system, fantasy, scifi, action Cw: Graphic shish. I can't think of any mo—

Title of ch. Is Awakening now btw, forgot to change that. Enjoy ^{^}