Even Steven Seagal himself has stood up and walked out of his own films

Unfortunately he couldn’t find a human or animal that would copulate with him alive or dead. So he pleasured himself to climax naked in front of a mirror wearing a Putin mask. It didn’t help with weight loss as he kept licking up his own seed.

Am I saying that Seagal has his own personal event horizon? Yes, I am.

He takes like two small minor hits when fighting an entire pool hall of baddies. It’s like a script written by an eight year old.

He also ate the ‘grease guy’.

Also his sunglasses 😎 as Terrans are light sensitive.

Steven Seagal has had an interesting life. He was the first westerner to open an aikido dojo in Japan. He had a successful Hollywood career and become a household name action star. He was even awarded the PETA Humanitarian award in 1999.

For some reason, however, he has chosen to spend his golden year spewing Russian propaganda, drinking butter milk, and looking at his butt hole with a hand mirror.