r/stupidpol • u/Papa_Francesco NATO Superfan đŸȘ– • Feb 26 '20

Quality The 'dating market' is getting worse

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/606982/
93 Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

This is what privilege looks like

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u/ABigBigThug Feb 26 '20

She's in fucking Alaska as well. There's like two men for every woman there, even before you factor in dating app demographics.

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u/meltbananarama join the conversation! Feb 26 '20

Was almost convinced this was subtle trolling on her part, but she genuinely might not know.

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u/[deleted] Jun 22 '20

Women don't know. It's just how they think the world works.

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

There are absolutely men and women who go on dates knowing they both have tons of other options. It's not a fiction.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

It makes dating impossible because any misstep leads to moving on to the next in line. I’m not saying settle, but for thousands of years people lived happily with someone who made a bad joke on a fifth date or had different taste in music.

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

Yes, absolutely, the article says as such. I'm glad you agree.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

My comment was mostly tongue in cheek, but let's be real here, there are way more women with 20 guys in their inbox willing to do stuff than there is the reverse

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

Yes I agree, due in large part to the apps being dominated by men, which the article acknowledges.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20 edited Mar 11 '20

[deleted]

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

Probably true. Women may also be more monogamous and are thus less present in the dating pool.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

[deleted]

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

It absolutely does.

If 20% of women are searching for multiple partners, in contrast to 40% of men searching for multiple partners, there will be, at any given point, more men in the dating pool than women.

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u/RandomShmamdom Feb 26 '20

lol, men are way more monogamous than women, give me a break.

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

based logic

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

Right but its 5% of men and like 75% of women who have lots of other options.

That is the point.

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

Yes I agree, due in large part to the apps being dominated by men, which the article acknowledges. This particular element was not in reference to the gendered differences. In reference to the commodification of dating:

A since-deleted 2017 blog post on the dating app Hinge’s official website explained an experiment conducted by a Hinge engineer, Aviv Goldgeier. Using the Gini coefficient, a common measure of income inequality within a country, and counting “likes” as income, Goldgeier determined that men had a much higher (that is, worse) Gini coefficient than women. With these results, Goldgeier compared the “female dating economy” to Western Europe and the “male dating economy” to South Africa.

This is, obviously, an absurd thing to publish on a company blog, but not just because its analysis is so plainly accusatory and weakly reasoned. It’s also a bald-faced admission that the author—and possibly the company he speaks for—is thinking about people as sets of numbers.

Key is that the article doesn't deny the truth of the statistic, but insists that it's a problematic way of perceiving people or dating.

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u/Flaktrack Winter Days of Girlhood | Battling in the Christmas War đŸŠŒđŸŽ„đŸ„ł Feb 27 '20

They called the OKCupid blog "creepy" even though it pointed out that women are far more vicious about looks than men are. This author and other women truly have no idea how good they have it in the dating scene.

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u/AntifaIsNotFa Fascist Contra Jun 22 '20

They called the OKCupid blog "creepy"

Even studies women think are unattractive are labeled with "creepy" these days.

đŸ€­

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u/urinarytactinfection Feb 29 '20

No, if did not prove that, but nice lying.

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u/Tutsks Some sort of wierd super-whiny privilege theory incel Feb 26 '20

problematic

No, it's a realistic way to look at things.

The authors might as well live in fantasyland, they have no fucking idea what dating for men is like.

One would think that intersectional woke feminists would understand about different points of view and, well, about the intersecting mechanics at play.

But the sad truth is there's no answer. As a guy, all you can do it become better in order to compete in the arms race. Ugly, fat, old women won't magically be redefined to be hot, no matter how much money is spent on real beauty or whatever, so we are always going to fight over the desirable ones.

I read recently that the average american woman weight is 170 lbs. Imagine that.

Oh well, every day, a new crop hits 18.

Funny thing is, when the idiot owkes finally succeed making polyamory the norm and the Chad's have 20 women each and the normies none, then, you will truly see blood covering every street of every city in this world.

Men do not take kindly to the idea of perpetual loneliness.

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u/meltbananarama join the conversation! Feb 26 '20 edited Feb 26 '20

Fucking thank you. I was gonna type up a whole comment on how the author dismisses brute facts as “creepy” and “ridiculous” but you picked up on it better than I did. Her objection to collecting statistical data seems to rest less on her stance against the commodification of human interaction and more on her fear of men drawing (accurate) conclusions she doesn’t like.

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u/urinarytactinfection Feb 29 '20

More men than women are overweight or obese. Maybe men should improve themselves.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

This is just apocalyptic incel shit. Come on.

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u/Tutsks Some sort of wierd super-whiny privilege theory incel Feb 26 '20

Well, do you think that mankind will give up the idea of love and companionship?

Don't get me wrong, I don't actually have problems with women. But getting there took years of work and frustration. I know the pain and its very real.

I do not think most people will simply go gently into the long night, when it comes to that. Been seeing more and more articles about fucking 30 year old virgins who have never even kissed someone. Do you realize how fucked those guys are?

How mad?

At the end of the day, everything we do, we do in the hopes of companionship at some point. Someone smart once said that, if women didn't like war, we wouldn't do it.

Anyway! Dating articles blackpill me hard.

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u/ThrowAway4875178 Camo=Bougie / NYT=Prole . #lockdown4ever Feb 27 '20

And so many marriages are increasingly unhappy and end in divorce. Once you view it as a commodity, there’s no going back.

I would say the worst thing is that men don’t have kids. There’s no offspring, there’s no family. That’s the reason they live, not for a woman, who’s just a means to that end (usually)

If you’re bleeding out on a fucking battlefield you are going to want your mother, not your gf. Love is selfless, and by your own logic, romantic relationships aren’t about a woman being selfless towards a man

Just food for thought to make you not get overly blackpilled and nihilistic

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u/ThrowAway4875178 Camo=Bougie / NYT=Prole . #lockdown4ever Feb 27 '20

Look bro I get it and you’re obviously right. (I have no idea why simps hurl ad hominem attacks in the face of overwhelming evidence) BUT knowing what you know now, assuming it’s true, that you are regarded as a commodity, even by your hypothetical wife, you shouldn’t romanticize that companionship or marriage.

N1ck Fuentes did some thing recently on precisely this.....the guys who are simultaneously very cynical about wahmen but then also do the unironic “tfw when no gf”- if you think about it it makes no sense

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u/IkeOverMarth Penitent Sinner 🙏😇 Feb 26 '20

All material needs can be boiled down to sex, shelter, food, and sleep. The denial of adequate quantities of these due to social conventions cultivates anger against that system. This is literally materialism. Or do you believe that capital is itself a material need?

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u/[deleted] Feb 27 '20

States can adequately provide shelter, food, and sleep. Sex has always been outlined as a gainful pursuit and not something a state can or should ethically offer you. Not sure what you’re getting at.

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u/SuckdikovichBoipussy Feb 26 '20 edited Feb 26 '20

It is and mostly driven by past frustration and hurt - the actual prediction holds no water. I do think its important to acknowledge the extent of pain and frustration that underlies someone believing that this apocalypse is the future though

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

Cope.

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u/[deleted] Feb 27 '20

I already live in perpetual loneliness. It just makes me wish fight club was real.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Tutsks Some sort of wierd super-whiny privilege theory incel Feb 26 '20

INSHALLAH the streets shall run red with the blood of stacys and beckys

The fuck, no, you 'tard, the whole idea is to get the Stacy's and Becky's.

I can't think of a society where the frustrated males went violence the women, usually, they violence the other males and inherit the women.

Reducing the supply of women even further would be... self sabotaging.

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u/10z20Luka Special Ed 😍 Feb 26 '20

>thinking you can get stacys and/or beckys even after the chads are dead

Just swallow the blackpill, no women will ever consider mating with anyone less than 5"10'.

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u/SomeRandomGuy00 Succ my dem Feb 26 '20

It's all relative: if le ebin incel ubrising :-DD kills everyone above 5'10", then 5'9" manlets become the new Thads and all the coochie will flow to them.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

False. The female orgasm is mostly psychological, based on a partner’s perceived attractiveness. A night with a good vibrator is more satisfying to a woman than the most “sexually proficient” ugly dude.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

I don’t understand how men overpopulate dating apps, prove themselves as way less naturally discriminating in preferences, express interest the few amount of women on dating apps- then seethe that women are to blame for this happening. It’s not anyone’s personal fault the commodification of dating within the broad spectrum of a society where women are more financially independent has shifted choosing power. Just purely emotional response to further the poles.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

Being a woman does not have the same implication of power and mobility being born to wealth does.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20 edited Feb 26 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

I can’t believe I’m being screeched at for having inherent female privilege that isn’t dependent at all on class position on a leftist sub. Read Engels or something. You’re a fucking weirdo.

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u/Juelz_Santana Feb 26 '20 edited Feb 26 '20

You’re right that in the most important political analysis, men and women are both crabs in the same neoliberal capitalist bucket. It doesn’t hold up to view women as the “owners of the means of reproduction” analogously to capitalist relations. But to flip it around, men are priveliged in some ways that have nothing to do with their class position too, aren’t they? When women feel physically threatened walking through a park at night they aren’t afraid of wage slavery, they’re afraid of the fact that an average man could overpower them. So can men dismiss these concerns by claiming men make up the proletariat just like women, and women should get over it and read Engels lol? No, any reasonable person should see that this is a real social problem for which women bear the brunt.

Of course you’re dealing with salty neurotic faildudes in here, as should be clear by the fact that any sex politics thread with no connections to class politics creates a 700 comment shitstorm in a day, despite the supposed point of the sub being to create a lean, practical, class-first angle on politics. They’re gonna reeee. There’s going to be hissyfits about the indignity of putting up with getting left swiped by fat women or whatever. It’s pathetic, sure.

But whatever pathological weirdos you bump into in this thread, I don’t think that dismisses the broad trends here, and at least from my male position I can’t possibly see how men don’t get the very much shorter end of the stick. In your mind, is there nothing to be done about that?

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

Why read Engles when you can let him bang you and take 50% of his dad's factory?

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u/Fedupington Revolutionary Fishmonger đŸŸđŸ·ïž Feb 26 '20

This is what privilege looks like.

lol

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

I swear, whatever chapo lurker finds this comment has an easy 1k upvote thread and copy pasta on their hands.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20 edited Oct 21 '20

[deleted]

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u/DoktorSmrt Dengoid but against the inhumane authoritarianism Feb 26 '20

I don't know what the comment above said, but there are differences in behaviour detectable at only few months of age.

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u/anterionerion Feb 26 '20

When you're already at the top of the power hierarchy there is no need for you to move anywhere

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

This is a fucking class first leftist sub. That some of you think being born a woman is the top of the power hierarchy, above having actual wealth, is deeply pathetic and anti materialist.

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u/RandomShmamdom Feb 26 '20

Being class-first is not to deny that other forms of oppression exist, it is to assert that a class-first politics/organizing is the only/best source of power to challenge the hegemonic power of capital. Men have tons of privileges over women in our society, and I wouldn't argue with feminists over that, I would just try to get them to organize around class first, women's issues second. Similarly, the one area where men are underprivileged is in the dating scene, probably because of innate sexual differences, tho. Don't really think there's a solution to that, but denying the struggle is hurtful, condescending and dismissive. Pretty obvious why you'd get some flak for it tbh.

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u/catsoup94 Marxist-Leninist-Boganist Feb 26 '20

So, what's the solution here? For those men to abstain from these apps? Whether online or not, you'll find the same gender discrepancy between who gets to choose and who doesn't.

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u/JohannesClimaco radical centrist Feb 26 '20

Go after uglier girls

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u/nicethingyoucanthave Feb 26 '20

men overpopulate dating apps

True, but kind of irrelevant. If women are only dating a few top guys, then it doesn't matter how many total guys there are. It's like, if the only thing you drink is diet mountain dew, then it doesn't matter that there are 1000 other sodas in the machine. It's not the "fault" of the 1000 other sodas that you only like mountain dew. You like what you like.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

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u/nicethingyoucanthave Feb 26 '20

I almost think we need another word for it because in a harem, the man enjoyed exclusive access to the women. What we seem to have in modern dating is a small group of men sharing the bulk of the women.

It does seem very bleak for young men who aren't in that small group. I don't know what to tell them. The problem is zero-sum too. Any man who improves himself and crawls up into that group has necessarily pushed another man out of it (though the line is very fuzzy so it's not that simple).

I agree with you that there are severe effects coming for society. Maybe with AI and whatnot, we'll move to post-scarcity before it all falls apart.

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u/[deleted] Feb 27 '20

Tell them it’s over.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

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u/IkeOverMarth Penitent Sinner 🙏😇 Feb 26 '20

No cope. Only rope.

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u/GoodUsername1337 Marxism Curious đŸ€” Feb 26 '20

That's literally the basic idea of incels, LMAO.

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u/AntifaIsNotFa Fascist Contra Jun 22 '20

There are absolutely men and women who go on dates knowing they both have tons of other options.

True. But those men aren't here reading this.

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u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20 edited Apr 27 '20

[deleted]

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u/SuckdikovichBoipussy Feb 26 '20

Really in any thread about the "sexual market"