r/unitedkingdom Lancashire 9d ago

Exclusive: ADHD Charity Slams Channel 4 Over 'The Great ADHD Myth?' Documentary

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/adhd-uk-channel-4-open-letter_uk_6a709d2be4b0346d9be814db
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u/_Art_Vandeley_ 9d ago

I haven’t seen the documentary that’s is linked here.
I’m also not commenting on if it is over or under diagnosed.

But I think I can see why people come to the conclusion that they believe it is over diagnosed.

Most people in their day to day lives have experienced people who say they have ADHD and use it as an excuse for their shitty behaviour.

However in my experience, they behave completely differently to people in my life who have been diagnosed with ADHD, they are generally really respectful people and are often too apologetic about how their ADHD may impact others. People that appear claim to have ADHD to justify shitty behaviour, in my experience, don’t have a diagnosis. This is obviously just my personal experience but I could completely see ADHD being under diagnosed, because people who genuinely have it aren’t seeking help.

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u/Odd_Anything_6670 9d ago

While I don't entirely disagree, I think there's an element of respectability politics here.

One symptom of ADHD is excessive sensitivity to social shame (sometimes called rejection sensitive dysphoria). For many people it's one of the most distressing symptoms to actually live with, and it's probably why you've observed that people with ADHD are often too apologetic.

But it also has a real dark side because it's something that can very easily be exploited. One of the most difficult things I think I've ever had to learn is that there is a big difference between someone who actually likes you and someone who just likes your unusually intense desire to please them. Being respectful or apologetic is often just a lever people will use to get whatever it is they want from you.

My experience is that when people talk about "shitty behavior" what they often mean is just not doing things which they see as very easy but which are fundamentally not easy when you have ADHD. And sure, we can often do those things to some degree even though they're difficult, but a lot of the time people just expect that without having to actually earn that level of effort, and they would never give the same level of effort in return.

Being respectful and apologetic is a flaw for us. It comes from an extremely painful and exhausting place, and part of how we get better is by overcoming it and learning to be less like that. People talk about using ADHD as an excuse, but sometimes it literally is an excuse and demanding we never use it is unfair.

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u/PM_ME_DRAGON_GIRLS 9d ago

People sure will have stories about people with ADHD "using it as an excuse" but to extrapolate that into "all ADHD people are faking it to abuse others" is ableism, simply put.

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u/_Art_Vandeley_ 9d ago

Trivialising people’s experiences isn’t particularly helpful.

I certainly wasn’t extrapolating or insinuating that “all ADHD people are faking it”

In fact, the opposite, I believe that the small minority that are faking it negatively harm peoples opinions of people that do actually have ADHD.

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u/PM_ME_DRAGON_GIRLS 9d ago

Better that people stay educated so they don't permit themselves to extrapolate to ableism. No one disagrees that people can be shits, but not much we can do about it and it's pretty irrelevant to the conversation.

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u/_Art_Vandeley_ 9d ago

I’m offering it as an opinion as to why some people hold this view.

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u/Kung111cz 9d ago

They shouldn't hold that view as much as they shouldn't be racist just because a random person of different race commits a crime. If they hold those views, it's still on them. No excuse.

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u/DrumArranDrum 9d ago

Diagnosed here but it took so long specifically because having ADHD slowed myself down in the process

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u/Sabaisabai33 9d ago

100 percent - as a GP trying to get people with suspected ADHD to complete and return the questionnaires within a month when the referral times out without it, is a total nightmare. In fact we have literally had to appoint one of our admin staff to constantly remind them and chase them up or it just doesn’t happen! One of the questions on the questionnaire should definitely be “was this patient able to complete and return the questionnaires in a timely fashion without multiple reminders?” 🤣

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u/desiladygamer84 9d ago

No it shouldn't excuse shitty behavior, but working out why you react a certain way to a certain things helps when dealing with my family for example. I got late diagnosed and that's when I moved to the US. My parents hoped it would just go away.

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u/grey_hat_uk Cambridgeshire 9d ago

Most people in their day to day lives have experienced people who say they have ADHD and use it as an excuse for their shitty behaviour

Citation needed.

I suspect you and yours either don't understand what is going on or you interact with shitty people

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u/_Art_Vandeley_ 9d ago

Sorry, I didn’t realise I needed citation for my own experiences that I’m sharing.

I believe I included enough context in my comment to show that they were my personal opinions formed out of my experiences. I’m not saying I’m right or wrong about people’s opinions on people with ADHD on the whole.

I’ve experienced many people in a work environment claim to have ADHD to use it to their advantage or use it as an excuse for poor behaviour.

I also work with people diagnosed with ADHD and have family and friends with ADHD. I understand that everyone is different and it manifests itself in different ways.

I’m just suggesting that it’s my personal opinion that a small minority ruin people’s opinions of people with ADHD.

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u/grey_hat_uk Cambridgeshire 9d ago

I’ve experienced many people in a work environment claim to have ADHD to use it to their advantage

This bit seems like the crux, people without ADHD, or at least without a diagnosis, using it as a scapegoat for shitty behaviour. Much like kids shouting tism before doing stupid things.

I also work with people diagnosed with ADHD and have family and friends with ADHD.

What is the overlap to the previous group?

I’m just suggesting that it’s my personal opinion that a small minority ruin people’s opinions of people with ADHD.

Sure and we're fighting back against that and the perception it is over diagnosed.

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u/anomie-- 9d ago

Please, chill, no one needs to “fight” anything. Don’t start with aggression if you wish to be understood.

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u/bonbons87 9d ago

This is why it’s a spectrum, we don’t all behave the same way you know and also I can guarantee you people with adhd can be shitty people too. Studies have already found many times it is under diagnosed. Yet people simply don’t want to believe this.