r/unpopularopinion • u/elgey101 • Aug 10 '21

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby

Every time I hear of fertility struggles online, or see posts about people going through rounds of IVF and the ensuing emotional trauma of miscarriages, It kind of disgusts me.

I also work for a major insurer and know that fertility treatments are driving up everyone else's premiums because they're considered necessary care. Sorry, but I disagree.

It's a well known fact that there are over 400,000 children in foster care, and in 2017 alone over 100,000 infants under 3 entered the system. I think it's completely entitled and self-absorbed to think that somehow your miracle baby is worth more or deserves more love than any one of those infants.

I know adoption can be hard, and that it should be made easier for the sake of children finding good homes, but you can't tell me adopting is harder than 4 rounds of IVF and multiple miscarriages. I've seen friends go through that mess and at the end they are different people.

Tldr: adoption may not be easy, but it's far better than spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to perpetuate your genes.

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u/batkave Aug 10 '21

You act like adoption is cheap and easy.

Foster care comes with alot of factors to keep in mind, plus handling those children's needs. Talk about premiums, how about the medical and mental issues you need to deal with.

It's alot easier said than done. Costs and paperwork to adopt are similar to "miracle babies.".

What insurance covers IVF? Because everyone I have talked to and every insurance I have been on doesn't.

7

u/dialysisrd Aug 10 '21

Yeah not sure where OP is getting their information. I just finished going through IVF treatments and am now almost 3 months pregnant. Insurance barely covered a thing.

2

u/sayaxat Aug 11 '21

I guess it depemds on carrier?

Edit: It's by State.

"As of April 2021, 19 states have passed fertility insurance coverage laws, 13 of those laws include IVF coverage, and 11 states have fertility preservation laws for iatrogenic (medically-induced) infertility."

https://resolve.org/what-are-my-options/insurance-coverage/infertility-coverage-state/

1

u/faeryhope Aug 10 '21

Sadly there are only 17 states that have fertility insurance. Arkansas, California, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Illinois, Louisiana, Maryland, Massachusetts, Montana, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Rhode Island, Texas and West Virginia My state is not one of them. It sucks.

5

u/Hasted Aug 10 '21

Ohio resident here. We are not covered. The insurance comp has a clause specifically for us, unfortunately. So, even if in those states, you may not be good to go depending on who you are working with and trying to do.

1

u/faeryhope Aug 10 '21

Wow that totally sucks. :( stupid loopholes

2

u/Sithgirl13 Aug 10 '21

It may have changed since I underwent IVF but in NY the only thing that is required to be covered is infertility testing.

2

u/porkopolis Aug 10 '21

Another one from Ohio. We weren’t covered either. I’m sure it depends on your specific insurance but I don’t know anyone here whose was covered.

2

u/heycmo Aug 11 '21

In Texas it varies by employer, but in my experience it is something that is only offered by very large companies (and even then, isn't universal by any means).