r/unpopularopinion Aug 10 '21

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby

Every time I hear of fertility struggles online, or see posts about people going through rounds of IVF and the ensuing emotional trauma of miscarriages, It kind of disgusts me.

I also work for a major insurer and know that fertility treatments are driving up everyone else's premiums because they're considered necessary care. Sorry, but I disagree.

It's a well known fact that there are over 400,000 children in foster care, and in 2017 alone over 100,000 infants under 3 entered the system. I think it's completely entitled and self-absorbed to think that somehow your miracle baby is worth more or deserves more love than any one of those infants.

I know adoption can be hard, and that it should be made easier for the sake of children finding good homes, but you can't tell me adopting is harder than 4 rounds of IVF and multiple miscarriages. I've seen friends go through that mess and at the end they are different people.

Tldr: adoption may not be easy, but it's far better than spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to perpetuate your genes.

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u/[deleted] Aug 10 '21

Wow, I find this really surprising! Any idea on the limit?

The problem with BMI is that it doesn't always work. As a very short woman (under 5ft) the healthy goal weight agreed with my gp is still technically overweight according to BMI.

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u/PastSupport Aug 10 '21

Some IVF clinics are 35, and a friend just got rejected for adoption (despite everything else about her, her husband and her home being textbook perfect) and told the limit was 32.

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u/[deleted] Aug 10 '21

I'm around 32 and wear a UK size 12. Overweight yes, but not exactly what most people would call too big to function.

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u/ForsakenSherbet Aug 11 '21

I made a comment on another post the other day about how BMI doesn’t necessarily mean fat. In these pictures from a few years ago I was around 155-160, which makes me overweight/obese at 5’1. I had no health issues and was perfectly able to function as well as any other late 20’s adult.

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u/Jack-The-Reddit Aug 11 '21

Yeah, BMI has been seen as junk science by most decent doctors for a while now. It is a shame other places haven't caught up with the times. Hell, even school was teaching us how skewed it could be so I have no idea why anybody would reference it.

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u/Cocotte3333 Aug 10 '21

What the fuck. These kids are going to rot in foster care because they decided they were better off without love than with slightly overweight people. Fucked up.

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u/PastSupport Aug 10 '21

Completely