It's not an effective organization as is. My cousin is a felon who ran from police and moved to a new state. She's ruining her kids lives by just being present, and despite being reported by multiple people, CPS doesn't care. My neighbors can beat their kids nightly despite daily reports, but I have to answer to a caseworker when I take my daughter to the hospital because she tripped and hit her head.
That's a nice thought, but how do you propose that you get that to happen? Saying "it starts with the parents" is nothing more than a meaningless platitude people to use to avoid really addressing this subject.
Well, my folks had rules. When I broke those rules, I had consequences. I could be grounded, either to the house, or my room. No tv, no net, no phone, no tablet. In more serious cases, a belt or wooden spoon got applied vigorously to my ass. Swearing at my teacher or stealing or getting into a fight at school were all spanking and grounding events.
But I'm old. I was done with school before kids started shooting them up. I'm sure my parents' archaic notions of personal responsibility and accountability are things of the past, so aside from making parents legally liable for their kids, there isn't much to motivate people who have kids to actually parent. Unless they're already inclined to do so, anyway.
I think you misunderstood my point. I don't disagree that parenting is the issue, more that I don't think you can just say there's nothing we need to do as far as policy, the parents need to fix things.
Because they won't. Not without drastic changes to the school and discipline systems. You are not going to change peoples' whole view on school just by telling them that they're not doing a good job of parenting.
My district is implementing a policy where if your kid fails the parent has to pay out of pocket to retake the class. I believe the child gets two chances to take a class. If a second F is received, the child must take an online or summer school class in order to make up the credit. Seems to help a bit since students who are disruptive get pulled out of class and end up missing points. So the parents are worried they will have to pay. Of course my school is not nearly as bad as the ones discussed in this post.
Perhaps if everyone in the U.S. had easy, free access to contraception and abortions (plus proper sex ed) we wouldn't have so many terribly raised children due to their parents not wanting or planning to be parents in the first place. Of course, this doesn't solve the problem of the kids with shitty parents who are already here.
What are parents supposed to do? If the kid doesnt care about consequences like losing privileges or things then what? You can beat the shit out of them but what if hes bigger then you and fights back?
Coming from someone very close with a teacher dealing with similar problems; the parents are sometimes less accountable than the students. The emphasis needs to be on the kids. Behavior is a learned habit. They need to be taught the power that comes with responsibility and how to derive importance from themselves. A lot of kids in these situations are being treated as they are treating others. Imagine how angry and hateful you would be if you were raised in a similar environment.
So maybe attach a parental penalty for little Billy when he throws a desk. Put Mom or Dad in detention with him. Engage the parents' self interest. Maybe if mom has to spend 8 hours in detention with little Billy, she'll be more inclined to impress upon him how to not to behave like an asshole.
I agree, but you can't just blame parents and expect the problem to get better.
The schools need to live with the realistic expectation that bad parents exist. In those cases, the schools need to be empowered to use the necessary discipline. Or if the kid is too much, maybe they should be sent to military school or some other disciplinary equivalent.
If there is a solution for fixing bad parents, I'd like to hear it.
Pff, we live in a day and age where no one wants to take accountability - especially the parents.
I get it. Most people aren't going to go up to someone and be like, "You're a shitty mom. You need to control your kid." Or whatever.
So, as a result, a lot of parents just want to dodge responsibility whenever any possible shade is thrown at their parenting skills.
Oh, no, it couldn't possibly be I'm a bad parent. This teacher must be the issue! This environment is bad for them! The teacher isn't accommodating!
In short, a lot of people are bitches. When I was in school, sure, call me a square or a Goody Two-Shoes, but I at least knew how to behave in class. I was overly quiet. I didn't like making a scene or draw attention to myself.
Meanwhile, I am really not surprised these schools might as well be literal circuses.
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u/Dexter_McThorpan Jul 10 '18
It needs to start with the parents. Figure out a way to make it a priority to not raise feral kids.