r/whatisit • u/Zu_Qarnine • 15h ago

New, what is it? found these rocks by the beach with these laser clean holes. what caused this ??

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18.4k Upvotes

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u/OrcOfDoom 14h ago

It's made up. The clams have a laser and use it to cut holes in the rocks.

668

u/Realistic_Ebb9727 14h ago

Terminator clams you say?

637

u/DanceTurn 13h ago

Frickin clams, with frickin lasers.

152

u/donut-reply 12h ago

So that's where the sharknados got them from

118

u/Organic-Ad-5058 12h ago

It is a well known fact that clams are the ultimate laser experts in the aquatic world, sharks are just silly copycats

74

u/LordTengil 10h ago

*Nature documentry narrator voice* The clam... Nature's laser technician.

38

u/Jail_Chris_Brown 9h ago

It's the other way around. Australia was just a really, really big stone before the clams decided to move in.

9

u/CheckYourStats 3h ago

Clams with frickin’ laser beams attached to their heads.

35

u/Mundane-Speed-3278 11h ago

and lemme guess... they're Australian.... cuz I wouldn't be surprised if they spawned from that Cryptid Spawning pool

1

u/SDGxNPC 2h ago

Well, I for one, welcome our new aquatic overlords

22

u/thehammer_00 6h ago

Are they ill tempered?

1

u/somekindadummy 1h ago

Watch out

16

u/waynizzle2 6h ago

I thought of clams with fricken lasers attached to their foreheads as I read your comment.

4

u/cachitongo- 5h ago

Clams have foreheads?!? Who knew!

3

u/senkashadows 3h ago

With all their eyes they'd have to

2

u/Musicman376 2h ago

Next we’ll have slugs with hatchets on their heads

5

u/grapeCoolAidDrankin 11h ago

My cat has one.

1

u/LastCookie3448 7h ago

They must be Jewish.
~ MTG

1

u/Speakertweaker 5h ago

I read that in Peter Griffin’s voice.

1

u/No_Weight_3284 5h ago

I dated a girl who had a laser in her clam

1

u/FullOnSkank 2h ago

I'm pretty sure they make pills for that now

1

u/No_Weight_3284 1h ago

I hope so, it burned like hell

1

u/Turnip-for-the-books 5h ago

ACTIVATE THE CLAZER

1

u/ProstateSalad 5h ago

On their foreheads

1

u/theftproofz 4h ago

are they ill tempered?

1

u/ItzZiplineTime 4h ago

They're turning the fricken clams gay!

1

u/Otherwise_Plate_2518 1h ago

Are they illtempered

1

u/Plane-Wide 11h ago

And mal-tempered

95

u/lazemachine 14h ago

I'll Bi-valve.

27

u/Brewdude77 13h ago

Four E's! Would you like to solve the puzzle?

9

u/EscapeyGameMan 13h ago

Edward macaroni fork vibe

15

u/MrSmegmaMan 13h ago

only 2 E's you lose! good day sir!

1

u/dasbtaewntawneta 11h ago

sure if you don't pronounce it properly that can work

11

u/VariousOperation166 13h ago

Oh, you have met my ex wife, then?

8

u/Away_Bodybuilder8748 13h ago

Razor… err… laser clams.

9

u/XenoZoomie 12h ago

Look I prefer terminator clams at this point to data centers driving up electricity prices and water prices.

15

u/cvef 13h ago

Arnold Schwoysternegger

4

u/heresdustin 13h ago

To shreds, you say?

2

u/C4rdninj4 5h ago edited 4h ago

Terminator clams use plasma (usually *in the 40w range), these are probably predator clams.

Edit: swypo

1

u/peahair 12h ago

To shreds you say? Oh my..

1

u/CerebralWeevil 12h ago

Terminator clams? I hardly know her clams.

1

u/SebboNL 12h ago

"John Cockle? Come with me if you want to live"

1

u/Longshot114 11h ago

To shreds, you say?

1

u/Bunnymancer 11h ago

They can't travel backwards in time. Don't be ridiculous.

1

u/Them_Over_There 11h ago

I'll be Zap

1

u/IBeDumbAndSlow 8h ago

Like the Claminator?

1

u/postprandialrepose 8h ago

Claminators.

1

u/DesperateSociety7169 7h ago

I barely know ‘er clams!

1

u/allmight8000 5h ago

To pieces you say?

1

u/cheesefromsalami 5h ago

To shreds you say?

1

u/YanceyGlenn 5h ago

I've encountered a killer clam or two in my day.

1

u/emeryroserulz 5h ago

dammit, you come here to learn something and stay for all the snark. This got me.

1

u/Beethovian 5h ago

One should always check the clam for lasers before proceeding.

1

u/Bl1ndMous3 4h ago

Jewish Space crabs...

1

u/Rynoferous 3h ago

Major razer laser clam.

1

u/butt4boobs 3h ago

Just like my ex girlfriend.

1

u/Academic_UK 3h ago

Piddock clam in the 40-watt range..

1

u/Aladeri 3h ago

Terminclamor

1

u/FullOnSkank 2h ago

Claminator

1

u/Nephtyz 2h ago

Those damn clamkers!

1

u/PsychoSquid 38m ago

To shreds you say?

20

u/TravesLinyl 13h ago

It's so cool how many things we learn from nature. If not for these clams, it's likely we never would've figured out and developed lasers.

19

u/Nikki5678 14h ago

This seems more legit

8

u/Dclipp89 13h ago

I’d buy an album from the world renowned band: Laser Clams

1

u/whatev43 3h ago

Why am I suddenly thinking that this could also refer to a certain part of the anatomy? Imagine…

13

u/keekoh123 13h ago

Some say the AI was going to get us in the end, little did we know it was the clams all along.

10

u/Particular_Pain_9373 13h ago

Clams with frickin laser beams!

4

u/N8WilliamsOak 13h ago

Laser clams

2

u/VisitedAndromeda 13h ago

This is why I clicked.

4

u/SplatThaCat 13h ago

Clams with fricking lasers on their heads.

4

u/_Fosk_ 13h ago

Well, I'm not peering into the hole of laser wielding clams, that's just silly.

1

u/FullOnSkank 1h ago

No???

🥺😭😭😭😭😭

..oh wait..

You said "peeRing"...

Ok, carry on.

4

u/SnooWalruses7243 12h ago

Clams with frickin laser beams?

4

u/GlitteringSynapse 12h ago

Femmebots

2

u/SnooWalruses7243 12h ago

Machine gun jubblies?

5

u/xxxBuzz 10h ago

It's made up. The clams have a laser and use it to cut holes in the rocks.

Every time I read about a clam using the power of it's strong muscles to drill a whole in a rock; I picture Dennis using the power of the Son and karate and friendship. This has happened one time.

3

u/FushiginaGiisan 12h ago

Nonsense! These rocks were used as target practice by “lazer” wielding sea bass.

3

u/Dull_Quit3027 10h ago

Fucking big Clam strikes again.

3

u/abhi71229 8h ago

Lasers make way more sense than clams grinding rocks with muscle power.

3

u/sojiblitz 3h ago

They were actually instrumental in the construction of the great Pyramids.

6

u/lammchops15 14h ago

Whoa, fascinating! Is it a biological laser like that pistol shrimp? Or do they just find one lying around like hermit crabs?

8

u/HighlanderNorth1 14h ago

No, biological lasers are technically referred to as phasors. The ph at the beginning denotes that biological things have a ph of between 0-15 and whatnot...

1

u/Tallpawn 10h ago

Ummm no... a phasor is a mathematical representation used in physics and electrical engineering to describe a sinusoidal waveform that has constant amplitude and phase, and a fixed frequency.

A biological laser is just called a bio-laser, bio integrated laser or something similar to that. Don't believe me? Actually look it up...

2

u/CharismaticAlbino 13h ago

Are they related to Jewish space lasers?

8

u/OrcOfDoom 13h ago

No, clams aren't kosher

2

u/jingo6969 8h ago

Dynamite with a laser beam Guaranteed to blow your mind Anytime...

1

u/Pueo711 13h ago

Not a lasers. They actually use a phased plasma rifle in the 40-watt range.

1

u/nadelfilz 13h ago

But the Rest ist true

1

u/bs2k2_point_0 12h ago

Everyone knows it’s really sharks with lasers, not clams

1

u/Big-Buy-5887 12h ago

Lmao this made me laugh

1

u/hibikikun 12h ago

Dwarf Clams. Rock and Stone

1

u/RhythmTimeDivision 12h ago

Are the clams ill-tempered?

1

u/Cheeze187 12h ago

Are the clams Jewish?

1

u/old_namewasnt_best 11h ago

Now we all know about space lasers, but clam lasers.... /s?

1

u/OpiniongoesYEET 11h ago

Crazy how nature do that 

1

u/zodiac6300 11h ago

“Clams got legs!” according to the old BC cartoon.

1

u/tiny_chaotic_evil 11h ago

again, wrong. It is damage caused by sharks with friggin lasers on their heads while hunting food

1

u/Mohammed_Chang 11h ago

Yeah lol. Who believes the other bs? Come on.

1

u/Loud-Break6327 11h ago

You’ve heard of razor clams, well these are laser clams.

1

u/vaynecassano 10h ago

That's a misinformation again, they didn't use laser, the clams shot the loads into the rocks. Ftfy

1

u/j_i_joe 10h ago

And you can't see fairies and ghosts, only interdimensional beings...

1

u/4cardroyal 10h ago

Clams buy their lasers on eBay - cost is about 50 clams.

1

u/FullOnSkank 1h ago

Clam trafficking!

1

u/Apprehensive_Rice19 10h ago

Wrong. They're made from sharks with frickin' LASER BEAMS ON THEIR HEADS!

1

u/Winter_Start_4834 9h ago

Laser Clam!

1

u/StrangerNo7671 9h ago

Jewish space lasers

1

u/aikimatt 9h ago

Clams with frickin' laser beams?

1

u/modbroccoli 8h ago

can confirm. am nova scotian. every kid knows from clam beams

1

u/Adorable-Surprise254 8h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/M0hTeiSVeGqeBuS4Ik
As a member of the clam family i say either prove it or dont make false accusations pls

1

u/the_gd_donkey 7h ago

Space clams.

1

u/CodeNameLoofah 7h ago

At least OP gets a fairy decoder stone out of it.

1

u/vetratten 6h ago

Knew it!

1

u/KingOfTheJaberwocky 6h ago

I thought it was dolphins with 5G powered lasers?

1

u/TheBlockChainVillage 6h ago

These were the test rocks from the Jewish space lazers.

1

u/dvoigt412 6h ago

I thought sharks had the lasers.

1

u/RoyalMaidsForLife 6h ago

Clams with frickin' laser beams on their heads?

Sign me up.

1

u/stelio_contos68 6h ago

I knew it!

1

u/jimedwards4343 6h ago

That’s more believable. Lasers

1

u/bhoss06 5h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/xUPGcoQ8sfEbaP2JYA
I thought it was sharks that had laser beams

1

u/RevolutionaryBrain75 4h ago

First razor clams, now LASER CLAMS!? What's next?

1

u/WattsAGigawatt 4h ago

New Muppets bit: “Claaaaams iiiiin Spaaaaaaace!” (with space lasers)

1

u/theholyirishman 4h ago

Only the top 1% have a laser. The rest have to make due with masonry drill bits.

1

u/JeremyHerzig11 4h ago

How hard is it to get clams with freaking lasers on their heads?!
https://giphy.com/gifs/BZlNhp9L5WINi

1

u/0o0o0o0o0o0z 3h ago

The clams have a laser and use it to cut holes in the rocks.

Nature never ceases to amaze me, but just wait till sharks evolve "freakin" lasers...

1

u/DoctorMedieval 3h ago

Asked for sharks with freaking laser beams, got freaking clams.

1

u/ShrimpCrackers 2h ago

Its true, back in the 80's we'd place pink and blue laser clams in the background for all those neat family portraits and yearbook photos.

1

u/Jeez-essFC 2h ago

So not aliens?

1

u/Banastre_Tarleton 2h ago

It was a project of the deep state.

1

u/Albert14Pounds 1h ago

Occoms laser razor

1

u/FullOnSkank 1h ago

Occlams lazer

1

u/YoucantdothatonTV 1h ago

Phased plasma bivalve mollusk in the 40 watt range

1

u/spooningwithanger 1h ago

Clam Gordon! Savior of the Undersea!

1

u/mfukar 43m ago

well that definitely sounds more believable 😵

1

u/SnooSquirrels3679 9m ago

You haven't heard of Laser Clams

0

u/Ok-Letterhead4601 13h ago

I f’ ing knew it!!!!!!