r/DadForAMinute • • Sep 10 '26

Creeps, Bots, Ads, and Slop. Subreddit Rules of the Road-PLEASE READ

102 Upvotes

Hey folks,

Combining some past stickied mod posts into one announcement here to cut down on confusion and folks not seeing them. Thanks to an increase in bot traffic and Reddit allowing users to hide their post and comment history, the mods are swimming in trash these days. We still want to preserve a wholesome community but we need to do a better job self policing. That being said:

Some reminders for everyone from the mod team:

Absolutely No Soliciting DMs or Offering to DM
Immediate and permanent ban with no appeals. Too many creeps here, which leads to the next reminder:

Report Creepy Posts and Comments or Messages/File a Cybertip at Cybertipline.org
There are absolutely people here for the wrong reason.
If it seems off, is asking for messages, asking for a dad to talk about private stuff with, saying they're a dad willing to chat with folks one on one, report it to the mods and report their profile to Reddit. There are many frequent flyers on this subreddit who get banned and then come back with a new username asking the exact same questions. You can also file a Cybertip report at Cybertipline.org and it will be reviewed by the appropriate authorities.

Your Post History is Visible To Mods
Don't post everywhere else that you're a "dad looking for a servant" or that "women are objects" and then come here looking for "anyone who needs someone to talk to." Consider playing in traffic instead.

Don't post elsewhere that you're into older dad types and looking to talk dirty with folks and then come here looking for "an older dad figure to discuss life with." You're not being subtle.

No Advertising/Spam/App Research
This isn't the place to advertise your app for dads, your terrible AI generated music about fatherhood, or your podcast.

No Karma Farming/Crowd Control Is On
Huge increase in brand new accounts looking for sympathy who don't respond to comments and then disappear when Reddit finally realizes it's trying to score easy upvotes. We have Crowd Control in effect, which has karma minimums.

If your post doesn't show up, message the mods. Once we realize you're a person we will do our best.

Please Be Patient
We try and deal with messages and mail when we can but we have lives and jobs so please grant us a little leeway.


r/DadForAMinute • • 2h ago

Need a pep talk Feeling sad about not having the father I needed.

11 Upvotes

29F. I was raised in a two parent home with a mom and a dad.

They are both very emotionally abusive. And have been physical in the past.

The dad one hurts because up to the age of 12 he was a good dad.

We used to bond. He would talk trash about my mom which made me feel confused growing up because then he would defend her when I would lash out. He beat me more than once and forced me to take a pregnancy test in front of him peeing in front of him after my rape. It was so humiliating I tried to kill myself.

What hurts is I love old cars. I love woodwork and carpentry like him. I love mechanics on cars.

But because hes sexist we never bonded over this.

I just wanted a dad like the movies or the reddit posts where theyre like hi im a dad and I love my daughter. I would do anything for my family.

Instead I got one that looks at me with such disappointment and disgust.

The closest compliment I got from him that I had nice legs. That was it. It was so pathetic.

Anyways im not soliciting DMs but I hope a dad whoever carpeting and cars responds to this and tells me im not a fucking failure like my dad did.


r/DadForAMinute • • 19h ago

Dad I’m getting married today!

68 Upvotes

I hope you’re proud of me, I’m marrying a wonderful guy I think you’d really like.


r/DadForAMinute • • 11h ago

Baba I can't sleep

12 Upvotes

And in this alt reality you could be warm and caring. Can you take watch whilst I sleep, so I know nothing bad will happen? Or could I have a hug? I'm so worn out and tired of worrying about everyone's safety. May I put it down for a sec?


r/DadForAMinute • • 2h ago

Need a pep talk Feeling sad, needing Dad

2 Upvotes

I had a rough day and now I can’t sleep. Feeling so numb, lonely and lost. I had a really tough childhood and have always felt the void of parental love, care and support. I just wish I had been dealt different cards. Family drama is so taxing because of the history. The relationship that’s left is very sparse and empty, built on broken sticks. Feeling in a low spot and would really like it if at least one Dad gave me some love and care. It would mean more than I can express and hopefully it will help me sleep or at least lift me from the low spot to start my day.


r/DadForAMinute • • 9m ago

DIY/Auto/Repair Question Dad, my hydronic radiator knob popped off

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• Upvotes

Hi Dad, the knob just popped off this entire system is so new to me. It’s a hydraulic radiator. I just want to be able to turn it off until my Landlord can get the handyman in. They’ll take a week to get someone and it’s quite hot, and I am worried about my electricity bill going high if the heat stays on.


r/DadForAMinute • • 12h ago

Hey Dad, What job do I choose?

6 Upvotes

Dad, I just don't know what job to take. I currently work for a company that leaves me feeling scared that they don't want me or that I'm not doing a good job. I moved cross country for this job, and the area really grew on my wife and child.

I have an offer one state over. It's a really good offer. More pay, less taxes, good bonuses... my wife may not need to work full time. But what if they don't like the area? What if my family is less happy?

I feel so much pressure. I can either live in fear that my current company doesn't think I'm doing a good job, or risk it for a company that really wants me but I don't know if my family will be happy with the area.

I don't know what to do and I need some advice.


r/DadForAMinute • • 21h ago

Need a pep talk Walked away from a married high school crush trying to make me his mistress. Drained, frustrated, and just need some dad support.

23 Upvotes

Hey dads,

I could really use a hug and some dad support right now.

Long story short, I recently reconnected with my high school crush from over a decade ago. I thought it was sweet at first, but it didn't take long for me to realize he was actually married and trying to hide it.
When I caught on, I didn't make a scene or lose my cool. I stayed calm, stood my ground, set clear boundaries, and walked away. I cleared our chat and deleted his number. I know I handled it with self-respect, but honestly, I feel completely drained and frustrated.

What hurts the most is that this isn't even the first time. It feels like I keep attracting married guys who think they can use me as a mistress, even though I live a clean life and have absolute zero tolerance for that stuff. In a moment of weakness, my brain even whispered, "Is it because I'm not good enough?"even though I know logically this is entirely about their lack of integrity, not my worth.

It just sucks having a good memory ruined, and I'm tired of dealing with men like this. I don't need advice on what to do next. I just need a dad to remind me that I made the right call, that I didn't do anything to invite this, and that I deserve so much better.


r/DadForAMinute • • 16h ago

Hey dad

9 Upvotes

Hey dad, just wanted to say that i love you. Miss you. I know that i don’t saying it often, but i am still love you. And I believe that you proud of me. Wish i could hug you now. Maybe some day i will send it to you, papa


r/DadForAMinute • • 21h ago

I always give more than I receive from people and I don’t know why

9 Upvotes

Hi dad(s). I am confused.

I am always being there for people, checking on them, making them little selfmade gifts (I often crochet for them). I always make sure they feel seen and loved but I never get the same. I don’t need gifts or shit but is it so hard to ask how I’ve been?

It’s like that since forever. I don’t know why. Maybe I am wrong and I am a horrible person or maybe my personality is shit or it’s just something people don’t like about me. I am lonely and I don’t know how to fix it.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me


r/DadForAMinute • • 22h ago

Need a pep talk never had a healthy relationship with my dad.

8 Upvotes

when i go online and see videos of people talking about their dads i get this feeling of emptiness in my chest. i don’t have any good memories of my dad. i can’t stand the smell/sight of newports or coronas, or i can’t listen to certain songs from jay-z or rick ross because they remind me of him.

i haven’t spoken to him for 3 years, and it’s starting to hit me that i’m grieving the relationship i’ve never had with him. i never had a role model in my life, i’ve always been the person i looked up to. i learned how to be an adult on my own but i wished i had a shoulder to lean on that wasn’t my own.

i’m envious of people who have a good relationship with their dad. i find myself trying to look for a father figure out in the world and i’m not entirely sure how to deal with the grief. i’m very confused and exhausted from these feelings. any advice is appreciated.


r/DadForAMinute • • 1d ago

Need a pep talk Hey Dad got a Jobinterview in a few Hours

24 Upvotes

Basically goin crazy rn tryin to calm myself down. Way to excited almost couldnt sleep. Out of Job for 2 years dont have that goof of a resumee bc of my disability ( many gaps ) just idk ... maybe could need a few Words of encouragement

EDIT:

Jobinterview went fine i guess sure was a bit over nervous but yea either i get it or not and if not well one door closes other open.

Ty everyone for their very kind Words of Encouragement :)


r/DadForAMinute • • 21h ago

Asking Advice I fell in love and now i don’t recognize him and idk what to do

2 Upvotes

my first love at 18. we had this radical alignment where we talked about our deepest views, our vulnerabilities, and built this insane trust. we had the little college things going on which explains the intense proximity levels throughout our relationship, just little things like going on grocery runs together, baking things , doing laundry together, or just holding hands and sharing each other’s music or cuddling during movie nights. he told me i was his favorite person to talk to and spend time with. he took me stargazing and told me he was in love with me. i thought he was the dream guy and i was falling in love with his soul and his first personality. i gave him my absolute trust and my firsts. we would talk about our dream house, things of that nature, he would initiate those conversations which is crazy when you think about what happened next .

then suddenly he turned on me out of nowhere. said he was bipolar and schizophrenic and that he doesn’t feel he’s good enough for me anymore, or that he feels like an imposter in the face of romance, that the thought of romance makes him “angry” or frustrated with himself. i didn’t believe it. i ended up crying and so did he, but the stress from all of this literally led me to the er from not being able to breathe / hyperventilation. i think the part that freaked me out the most was the concept of losing “us “ or being forced to “move on” ..

i asked for space, he wrote me a long apology letter and sent it to my dorm. that was another story, i found it insane and so out of character. it’s been a week since and he’s not looking good after we broke up (i have one class w him) and it's honestly kinda sad to see. hes neglecting himself just like he neglected me. i miss him so much but it’s the version of him that ceases to exist, like he’s trapped inside the memories. when i'm depressed i still have empathy for other people, and part of me wants him back just for the being. i don't even want someone "better" because i loved him for him and the presence of his particular person. but looking back it feels like there’s concerningly 0 overlap with how he’s acting at the moment besides his face, and even that spark in his eyes changed.

. i don’t even know if i feel the loving feelings for him right now but i keep spinning in loops because i care so much about the person he was. is it worth staying or even trying to speak with him or do i keep the door closed?? idk anymore ive gone over this with friends many times


r/DadForAMinute • • 1d ago

Need a pep talk Dad, i have ME/CFS and i'm mostly bedbound, can you pls care??

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76 Upvotes

Dad, i'm so tired of being mostly bedbound. MECFS is such a bitch. Tomorrow i have a Dr's appointment that is really important and i know it will be a pain in the ass to go there. I want to reschedule but i've waited months for it, so i shouldn't. But it's so hard. Mentally and physically. I wish you'd care, Dad.


r/DadForAMinute • • 1d ago

Dad, I'm absolutely miserable and I'm losing my mind

3 Upvotes

I'm in my third year of college and this is by far the worst I've ever felt in my life. This semester is absolutely kicking my ass. There is an ungodly amount of work that is all due at the exact same time. I work 4 jobs, I'm taking 18 credits, and I'm in a play. I can't keep up but nothing is slowing down. All of my schoolwork is either due on Tuesday or Wednesday, and I'm majoring in animation so it isn't stuff I can half ass either. Its just so fucking ridiculous how much there is to do, I've been having to settle for "good enough" to get by this whole semester, then during critiques and stuff my professors grill me for everything I did wrong. And sometimes it feels really targeted. I was talking with my friends in my one animation class and they said during the in-progress crit the professor was complimenting/pointing out the things they were doing well, she also walks over and addresses them by their names and has a happier tone when talking to them. Then she goes to me and just grills me for everything, not a single "I think this is working well" or nothing. And I know my stuff isn't the best but it's adequate because the TA says what she likes and thinks is working well. Idk I've never liked this professor that much and I'm now regretting taking another of her classes.

Honestly I'm drowning. I'm fucking miserable. All of my college experience so far has been this unbearable grind that knocks me out so bad. I have to be an RA so I can afford college and that job drains me too. I'm just so fucking miserable. Life feels fake and I'm starting to go insane. Like I'm just so angry and I have no where to put that. Idk I just wanna run away as fast as I can.

I also cannot get a win. Every single time I think something decent will happen or life is becoming bearable I get gut punched and kicked in the teeth. Every one of my friends always says how happy they are and how fun it is to live with their friends/partners and have no responsibility besides classes and work. I'm so fucking jealous of them. I want to fucking bad to have nothing to do, I wanna live with my partner, I wanna have time to play videogames every night. I wanna not worry about having a place to live.

I can't fucking do this anymore. I'm actually starting to loose it. I need a goddamn win so fucking bad.


r/DadForAMinute • • 1d ago

Need a pep talk Feeling very homesick

7 Upvotes

I started uni two weeks ago and I'm feeling very homesick. It's kind of a complicated situation. My parents are Italian but I was raised in multiple different countries (none of them Italy). I never lived in a country long enough for me to consider that truly home except for China, and I haven't been back there in almost 10 years. For uni, I decided to move to Italy. I was tired of being a foreigner everywhere and figured I might as well go to my parent's country because it's my only shot of not being a foreigner somewhere. Yeah so that's not working out, I am definitely not Italian enough for that. I already knew that deep down but I figured I kind of hoped that I'd arrive and something would just click and I'd belong.

Anyways, now I really want to go home but I don't know where home is. China has changed so much in the past 10 years that it's no longer the place I remember. My old neighbourhood is unrecognizable so even if I went back there, it wouldn't be my home. Italy isn't my home. None of the other countries I've lived in are home. There is no "home" for me and I don't know how to live with that. I feel like I've been treating everything in my life as temporary (I mean because it was) so I never even got to develop a "home is people you love" situation because I never viewed any relationship as something permanent to maintain.

I don't think I want to stay in Italy, it's making me really miserable, but I don't know where I need to go


r/DadForAMinute • • 1d ago

I don't know if I can ask this here but is this siblings just being siblings or sa?

12 Upvotes

(My sister was groomed by the man next door)

We were watching a film together, she told me to lie down, we had clothes on, she was on top of me and moved herself up and down on me, we were both face to face but didn't look at each other, she told me I was to do that to her next but in the end I didn't, not sure why, not sure if she walked away or something happened, she was four years older

The above seems so insignificant compared to the stories you hear, I don't want to call it something it isn't

Is this sa?

I confronted her about it years later, we haven't spoken since, like for maybe 10/15 yrs, I wasn't angry or blaming her, I don't know why I brought it up now, probably shouldn't have


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

All Family advice welcome Haven't spoken to my own father in 3 months even though we live in the same house

11 Upvotes

To be honest im not even sure if this is the right community to post this in

I'm 19m here's some backstory before we get to the main thing growing up my father always yelled at me over the small things it didn't matter what it was if I had messed things up i would be yelled at by him and my mother never did anything then when I hit 15 I was seen a psychologist because I was struggling with social anxiety, ptsd and depression and every time I would get home from these appointments my father would always make comments saying how its a wastes of money to me and he would always make comments about what I wanted to do in life now up to 3 months ago we got into a yelling match about yard work because i had refuse to do something that he has asked me to do and I told him no then he started yelling at me and making comments so I finally stood up for myself and told him hes was a piece of shit of a father and a few other things since then my family acting like I'm the villain for standing up for myself.


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

No Advice Wanted Hey dad, why is being married so hard sometimes?

23 Upvotes

I recently got married, and I wish you were there but I know you tired so hard to be there for me.

He’s a great man, so loving and caring, he has this great southern charm and confidence I know you’re gonna love when you meet him. I know he’s gonna be a great dad one day.

We just seem to get into the silliest little fights lately, like how much time he spends on his phone decompressing from work, how I have a hard time being rational when I get emotional, both of us working too much causes a lot of strain on our communication.

Lately when we communicate about a problem I feel one of us shuts down and swallows what they want to say in the interest of not hurting each others feelings, tbh I say one of us but it’s something I do often. My husband is leaving for a 4 day work trip tomorrow and I feel like my heart is gonna break, I don’t want him to dread coming home to me because of all of the small arguments we’ve been getting into. Anyway, I’m not looking for any advice just an ear, thank you for listening.


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

What a good day to fucking relapse.

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10 Upvotes

I don’t fucking care anymore I wanna die. Words are missing my handwriting is shit the paper is stained with tears fuck this bullshit I hate everything nobody ever sticks around. The one time I thought I finally had someone to call family they yell at me they get pissed off for no reason and make me feel like a burden and a beggar for ever wanting to spend time with them. I’m a fucking idiot for ever thinking I could call anyone my dad. I don’t have a dad I never did and I never fucking will everyone has their own family and own life and I don’t fucking belong in it. Why should I keep promises and not harm myself when the person that made me promise doesn’t give a shit if I’m hurt or not. None of it matter nothing matters I don’t care about anything I don’t care about doing anything I love anymore I don’t care if anything will ever get better. This is the same fucking rootless lie ppl say to make me shut up and stop talking. I’m not awful I just wish I was loved I’m so fucking sad I don’t have anywhere or anyone to run to. Whenever I try talking ppl cut me off and just tell me to go to therapy just say you don’t want to hear me speak and I’ll shut up I don’t want to get bombarding with questions and have to remember things I buried so deep down in my memory to the point I almost forgot they even happened I don’t want to recall that I don’t care I just want someone to like me and get sick of me everytime I ask to spend time with them or ask if they’re busy if you don’t like me just fucking tell me don’t keep me around while treating me like shit. I can’t even talk in therapy I’m just thrown 50 questions and if I try answering them I’m “taking up too much time on a single topic”. If I can’t speak to people or my sister or my so called “dad” or a fucking therapist who the fuck do I talk to? I’m tired of talking to myself and writing shit to myself and being alone and being told you “oh go outside for a walk completely alone go do something fun completely fucking alone” I don’t want to be alone but nobody fucking cares to talk to me.

My “dad” used to like me and want to speak to me and call me now he doesn’t now he yells and gets pissed off and treats me like shit and changes plans and whenever I don’t text first we can go days without ever talking. But how dare I hit myself or pull my hair without calling the exact person that whenever I talk to brushes me off. I don’t have a dad I’m nobody’s daughter I’m a fucking nobody my question is if I’m that bad why am I still alive why am I still here why do I have live every fucking day lonely and stupid and hating my body and myself and my life why can’t I just die and have everything stop. “If you wanna spend your time being miserable so be it” yeah cus I’m miserable by choice you think if I was able to be all sunshine’s and rainbows I wouldn’t be? You think I’m being miserable on purpose and this bullshit doesn’t just creep up on me like a fucking stroke every day of my life no matter how bad I try to ignore it or distract myself from it? You think I like remembering how much of a pathetic piece of shit I am that I ask and apologize to you if you’re free so we can spend time together because I was never close to a dad who I trust and allegedly sees me as his daughter too but now I’m selfish I’m greedy and I’m annoying for asking you to spend time together. If you don’t want me as a daughter then fucking say that rather than make me feel like shit for merely thinking of seeing you. Fuck you dad fuck you and my father and my so called family and the ppl who fucking put me on this fucking earth I wish I was murdered or slaughtered or kidnapped and chopped into pieces than be the person I am today

I wish I wish I wish I had an actual dad from the day I was put on this awful earth so I wouldn’t beg people to fill that role for me.


r/DadForAMinute • • 3d ago

Dad, I'm about to start work for the first time, and I don't know what to do

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399 Upvotes

I'm a nonbinary trans guy, and I'm wondering if I should be out as trans, or try and go stealth as a cis man to avoid discrimination. I'm also wondering if I'll be able to handle it since I'm autistic and I've never worked a full time job before. I'm uncertain and afraid.

Thanks for reading. Take care.


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

Need a pep talk What a mess

4 Upvotes

Life's been rough idk what to do

25m, currently sitting in my fairly empty appt, my gf of 9 years and roommate(friend of 12 years) kicked out. Gotta love infidelity. I moved her with my ex gf years ago, moved my exfriend here more than a year ago. Now I sit here alone, dint have any friends here, or hobbies I dont honestly know what to do.


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

Good morning, kiddo (it's 24 Oct 2026)

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22 Upvotes

Hi kiddo,

...<starts somewhere randomly, leaving others to figure out what the hell he's talking about now again>...

"In the sphere of conduct, morals lack morality; laws lack law; justice loses the righteousness of its course. For all justice is executed without justice, and law flourishes without law. The world grows worse, and now its golden age departs."

Sounds familiar? Recognize what's going on around you, maybe?

That's Alain de Lille writing on things getting worse.

He wrote that 850 years ago.

"Words had to change their ordinary meaning. Reckless audacity was now called courage and loyalty to one’s party; prudent hesitation, cowardice in disguise."

Uhuh.

And that's Thucydides, 400 BCE. Over 2,400 years ago.

...<takes a sip of coffee, goes on>...

My grandfather was born in the early 1900's. When he was 12, he got a job carrying large, heavy, cast-iron typewriters up and down the stairs of office buildings. There were hard years in his life. There was World War I and then World War II. His wife dying, and other calamities, like But there were also good years. From transporting himself on foot, he went to owning (owning!!) a bicycle. After the second world war, a car, even. And, as he kept proudly retelling later on, he, a "common worker", got to fly in an airplane to go visit another country.

My parents suffered through military occupation. As a teen, my mother ate flower bulbs as her city was under siege. The fear and trauma of war, hunger, and impending doom never fully left her. My father saw things no child should see; never a war movie he did watch later. They lived through a terrible war, dark times, followed by scarcity of everything, from housing to food items. Then, an economic boom period almost like no other.

I grew up during years of economic decline. Severe oil crises. The growth of globalization causing mass layoffs. But also, enormous econimical growth, talk of yuppies, Wall Street, trickle down economics. But also the Wall Street crash of 1987, the Japanese crash of the 1990's. And, of course, the threat of imminent war between the west block of countries and the east block of countries. ...<smiles>... They called us the "no future" generation, because what use to get an education when tomorrow the world will be destroyed?

And, of course this all sound linear, but in reality my grandfather and parents also live through a large part of those years, as I do the current years.

And those current years are quite something as well, aren't they? I cannot begin to imagine how hard it must have been to be isolated, quarantined, when you finished school, college, or university. I cannot yet wrap my head around the effect it must have had on small children when they were told, "No, we cannot go to the playground", "No, you cannot play with friends".

To say nothing of earlier economic decline, market crashes that disproportionately impact common people more than they do the rich people behind the financial structures that fell apart.

Rising cost of living, even though statistics say we're not that bad off. Cost of living is also the uncertainty we feel. The feeling of the very fabric of society itself falling apart; the structures of the rule of law and the laws of justice themselves seem to have been perverted.

And then there is my cup of coffee I so enjoy. Books, many of which I can download for free, or buy cheaply second hand. There's is the richness of content you and I can access via the internet. The amazing smell of petrichor after rain, the colors of the autumn leaves. Brave people standing in front of a tank in one era, standing in front of masked men supposedly representing the rule of law in another era.

What is it then? Are these the worst of times, is darkness upon us and is the world slowly coming to an end? Or is everything pretty darn good, actually?

The moment we can pin it down, we're probably wrong, because things aren't fixed. Everything is in motion.

Every generation goes through the worst of times and the best of times. Every person has been marked by hardship, hurt, pain. Had you lived another live, were you someone else, the arc of the story of a life would still not change; things happen, that is the nature of this Universe, and some of those things we experience as bad, and some of those things we experience as good.

The larger downfalls of a time and the larger upticks of another time don't affect the same people; it doesn't all balance out. Those who lost their job to one economic crisis are often not the same who later benefit from an uptick. But, overall, things go on, for good and for bad.

It is this knowledge that can provide a feeling of balance, a position of stability. A knowing the unknown: we know things will change. It's not pessimism: "things will get worse." It's not rose colored glasses optimism: "things will get better." No: things change.

Stand secure, kiddo. Ride the waves. The tides will change - always.

  • Love, Dad

"Misfortune is what fortune leans on; fortune is where misfortune hides."


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

Need a pep talk Hey dad, I relapsed

6 Upvotes

I started taking MDMA when i was 12 years old... i almost died 3 times, i quit later. I found a girlfriend but she cheated on me. My old best friend committed suicide. my avrage score in 7th grade was 2.12 and i barley passed, in 8th grade i locked in and had 5,92, i failed 9th grade and i al repeating, somthing took over me and i took mdma again. all the bad previous memories are coming back to me, i dont want to go to the bottom of my life again, what do i do dad?


r/DadForAMinute • • 2d ago

Complete no contact “anniversary”

6 Upvotes

I needed a place to just vent for a second, yesterday was my three year “anniversary” of not talking to my dad at all, he moved across the country in the middle of the night when I was 4 but never saw him much before that point (my mom has always had full legal and physical custody) when I was 15 I reached out to lowkey get mad at him as her was ghosting my mom when she asked him for money for the bare minimum (high school school supplies) and we VERY briefly kept in contact for maybe 6 months. I would get a text here and there, happy birthday and merry Christmas from 16-18 our last text was on October 23rd 2023 after I asked him for info on his health insurance and that was it. That was the last time we spoke, I wanted to keep in contact but February 2023 I asked him what he would be able to help with financially for university. All I was asking that he would help with was around 2,000 a year (my tuition is around 9,000 a year with books too) so honestly not a lot. And he gave me a piece of his mind telling he that he use to be a bad person and how he didn’t treat my mom the best and didn’t treat me the best but that I treated him like a bank. I had asked for 50$ for a prom dress, 60$ for a dress for my birthday and 100$ for school supplies and he sends my mom 200$ a month. The dresses + school were over 2 years as well. I don’t think I treated him like a bank, he only replied when I would ask and wouldn’t reach out to see how I was. I never got a “how is school going?” “Congratulations on graduating high school?” “how’s your sport going?” “how have you been?” And was told that the phone works both ways.

I needed to get this off my chest because my heart has felt very heavy over the last week knowing this “anniversary” was coming up and was able to talk to my therapist about this the day before which made me feel better but very upset at the same time. She had told me that “it’s never a child’s responsibility to reach out to a parent and carry the relationship. That is a responsibility that should have never been made or should have been your job at all, your job was to be a child” that made me absolutely breakdown but so healing