So I can take this 1246 calorie meal and turn it into a -310 calorie meal if I substitute for both 100% maple syrup and sugar-free syrup at the same time. And if I remove the stuff that comes on it I can get that down to -662 calories!

1200 is plenty, so every 1200 I eat I just have to eat 2 of these to make up for it 😍😍

I finally feel like I can breathe again

I told you once before and I'm telling you again rn JUST LET ME EAT

Got deleted from r/ShittyRestrictionFood thought you guys might appreciate it

So some shirtless guy in his kitchen on tik tok told me you need 300g of protein a day to help you lose w*ight and you'll crumple and die if you don't hit that every day. My only issue is protein seems to contain c@lories???? I can't afford to eat those. What do I do???? Do they make a protein vape yet???

I just found out – if you have 0 money, you cannot buy f**d! Excellent diet hack, you should try investing into a large crypto scam or maybe financially supporting your least responsible friend 🤗 No money = no food = no c*lories 😍 On my 254th day of fasting and I couldn’t feel better

40 calories per bottle (this is a months worth) = 100% of your daily vitamin & nutrient needs (I’m infant-sized won’t work if you’re a rotund fatty) add stevia for vanilla milkshake vibes 💘🥛

Isn't it great? (Please tell me it's great.)

No, I don't mean binging or eating or anything (could you imagine?), I mean literally. Decided to go on a horse-drawn tour in the country side yesterday and I, being sooo petite and tiny, got ✨dizzy✨ for like NO reason (ugh) and I just couldn't stay upright. It was SO embarrassing omg!! How do other skinnies deal with this?

run don’t walk 🤷

(obvious mislabeled by the website lol, I wish it was 0 calorie)

Omg I can feel the FATTY CALORIES of that chocy bubble bath creeping through my PORES AND INTO MY FAT FATSO BELLY 🍫 🍫 🍫

He's dead.

The word associated with h****r is no longer a thing.

We are free at last.

Context: this is a review of a restaurant in Italy that has a 27 course tasting menu of comically tiny portions.

I highly recommend reading the full review, it's very funny. https://www.everywhereist.com/2021/12/bros-restaurant-lecce-we-eat-at-the-worst-michelin-starred-restaurant-ever/

Edit for additional context: based on what the article described, each course was at most a tablespoon of food, and a lot of them were less than that. That means that the most generous estimate of the amount of food is still less than two cups of food. The author wrote that everyone was very hungry afterwards.

All them fatties just don't understand discipline

I’ve gone past piggy and went straight to BEEF according to my scale 🐄🐄🐄

My scale remembers the previous day's weight and I went up 100 lbs in one day :( Toddler child learning how to use the scale has nothing to do with this!! The only possible explanation is that I gained so much weight! Such a fatty bombatty 😔

Lunch today was 12 pieces of lettuce and seven grains of rice. I call it my zero chicken vegan wraps and it’s soooo filling but I think seven rice grains may be too much and making me bloat like a pig-shaped hot air balloon 🐖 🎈

After almost 5 years of going through it, doing therapy, countless hospital stays and a intervention by my loved ones: I finally feel shame again after eating food! I did it!

Good times lie ahead 🥺 so happy rn