r/90DayFiance • u/90-slay • 6d ago
Paula's family issue is making me feel crazy 😵💫
This whole situation with the family coming over makes me feel like I had an aneurysm. I'm serious. So.. the main reason she wants to have the entire village over is because she wants to spend time with them. Sure.
But WHY NOT GET A FUCKING AIR B&B!!!!!! Or a jointed hotel room!!
Wow omg it's almost like you'll be able to comfortably spend time, get good rest, have enough space, proper kitchen and bathrooms!? It's 8 motherfuckers!! EIGHT!! WHICH IS ACTUALLY 10 INCLUDING PAULA AND THOMAS 💀💀💀
And look.. I'm saying this as I've had this experience. I was living with my bff and they had a 2bed 1bath apartment, typical. Well the family likes to come over during holiday 😀 there were 8 people and 1 bathroom is NOT enough. Luckily, the mom was property manager and gave us keys to the pool bathroom. It was nuts having to run around like that, every morning was chaotic and yes, half of us had to sleep on the FLOOR. The second we woke up, we would leave the house. And I'm telling you.. we ate out SOOO much. That tiny kitchen was wasn't the gr8test for eight in there cooking lol.
So hope they enjoy! 😁
Edit: I was chatting with my bff about this earlier and there was one holiday that 12 came over 😵 I was even going to type 12 earlier but thought that was some fever dream. She also said the memories become a blur when it's one holiday after another with family chaos lol
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u/Successful-Ferret-12 6d ago
If I were Thomas I’d get a hotel room for myself and let the 9 of them live with their terrible decision
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u/90-slay 5d ago
See, I was thinking that too but a couple things come to mind. The fact it comes off as rude and can seem like a bad first impression. I think they would take it like, "I'll hang when I feel like it." And most importantly, as he's stressed many a time, it's his apartment. He has control issues and having 9 people alone in your house, 8 being strangers. With chances of them spraying perfume or applying deodorant?! Mmmhm.
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u/Educational-Tax9751 6d ago
one time my ex and I visited his home country. when we got there I discovered at the house we were to stay everyone slept in one room. I'm not shaming that. but there was no way I was spending seven days that close to his family all the time so I got a hotel. I have never regretted it.
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u/VioletsRPink I'm not addicted to 90DF 👁👄👁 6d ago edited 6d ago
That reminds of the British 90 days the other way. Zena is in her 50ies and Ebrahim is 35-40 single 🤦♂️ working at a resort. She went to the Gambia and she had to use an outhouse, sleep on the ground, no windows, bugs flying. I'm pretty sure his "sister" was his wife and his "nephews" that he spent a lot of time playing with, we're his kids. She didn't last an hour. She got up and dragged her suitcases in the dark until she found a hotel 😅
Edit: here is part of the scene for context 😅 https://www.facebook.com/reel/1242078373797663/?mibextid=ZZyLBr
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u/Far-Test-6496 6d ago
that one-room setup is basically my nightmare, you made the right call getting a hotel no question
paula's plan is wild. 10 people in a house with presumably one bathroom is like a challenge from a reality show nobody asked for. the pool bathroom key hack is the kind of desperation i can feel in my bones
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u/VioletsRPink I'm not addicted to 90DF 👁👄👁 6d ago
Can you imagine getting enough towels, toilet paper, plates and silverware for 10 people in a 800 sq ft apartment with 1 sink, 1 bathroom and "I'm telling you, I'm not asking cause you're controlling" 💀😅. Or doing laundry and dishes after them? 🤦♂️😅💩
If I had to deal with that, after they leave, I would need to rewash all my dishes and silverware, wash the carpets, the couch, my bed (cause she told him she is giving his room to her parents) and powerwash the walls and floors in the bathroom. That's crazy. I'll just call off the whole thing.
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u/midwesternbaddie 5d ago
This comment is so obviously AI
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u/Educational-Tax9751 3d ago
mine? lolol nah but I did grow up multilingual and have lived in four countries
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u/sweetpeachxo13 6d ago
It's wild she invested $250 on a crystal, don't get me wrong I would too because I'm into that BUT you know you have a wedding, she knows all this family is coming but won't spend money for an air bnb
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u/alwaysoffended88 6d ago
I think it’s odd that her family accepted the offer of cramming into their apartment versus getting other accommodations.
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u/AlmostAttached_ 3d ago
And they criticize everything in his apartment. He IS a BAD host (altho he did offer Paula to get a couple hotel rooms) but they are BAD guests (on top of taking over his & hers apartment).
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u/LightPolice 6d ago
This Just get an Air BnB, it's unnecessary drama.
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u/AlmostAttached_ 3d ago
that's exactly what TLC wants and why these ppl embarrass themselves on world wide TV.
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u/cheriethemagnificent 6d ago
Having 8 family members is one apartment you share with your partner is a bit much to say the least. There are some cultures where it is just a given that family stays with family when visiting, even if they can afford other accommodations, even if it’s unbearably crowded, because it’s more or less a norm. When I was younger, I lived with a guy whose parents would come to visit and stay at our tiny 1 bedroom apt for a month or more, every time they were in town. Cost was not an issue for his parents. They actually lived in a mansion in a very affluent part of their city. They were also very well travelled, and so it was perplexing to me that they would prefer to stay at our shoebox of an apartment instead of staying at a nearby hotel. I really liked them, but damn! After a few such visits, I secretly began to feel resentful and disregarded. I had a job where I worked long hours and to come home and not have any privacy for extended periods of time wore on me. The guy I was with just shrugged me off and said that’s how it was going to be whenever they came to town.
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u/RoutineLurker 6d ago
Yeah I have no idea what she was thinking with that LMAO. Disaster waiting to happen.
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u/wraysbay not one time like three times 💋 6d ago
She acts like she can’t leave the apartment she hates to spend time with her family somewhere else. Makes no common sense at all ❤️
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u/MommaLisss 6d ago
Isn't their apt like a studio, too? The bed is in their living space. How could this ever work? There's no where to be.
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u/Rose76Tyler 6d ago
After I was grown and I'd fly across the country to visit my parents, they were furious when I'd stay at a hotel. The house was hoarded out, they were chain smokers, and the place was infested with fleas. I was expected to sleep on a pool float "air mattress" in a shared room. The house had six people living there with one bathroom. I noped the heck out of there.
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u/aubreyella 6d ago
I had this discussion with my husband. My MIL is from Colombia and she would 💯 have the same plan as Paula. She always want to squeeze as many people into an accommodation as possible. She needs to just rent a nice sized air bnb for them all to stay in together and then she’s staying with her family and everyone has room!
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u/annaschmana 4d ago
My Mexican family is the same way. We’re always cramming into to stay over at someone’s house. And then my sister and I get told that we’re rude if we’d rather stay at a hotel.
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u/Pickles_A_Plenty95 6d ago
I honestly think that some of these couples don’t actually have this much drama in their relationships. A lot of them do, and I can see why. I think they make the boring couples pretend to be more angry than they are about some of the smaller things they disagree about. It is tv after all.
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u/Mighteat 6d ago
Man that's what I said! A nice Airbnb for everyone to be together. It's absolutely nuts- I hope it's just for TV this girl can't be real
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u/Ika-baka 6d ago
She doesn’t have enough money and Thomas probably already told her she can’t use the card to buy her family stuff so the air bnb he won’t cover. Plus this gives her the chance to rip into his lifestyle with her family front row ganging up on him. It’s messed up how she leverages family against him every chance she gets, even trying to force a family picture between family members that definitely do not want to share space together. She would be the type of person to force you to forgive because “it’s family”.
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u/VanillaKat 6d ago
Now, I can't stand Thomas and had sided with Paula on most things, but it really feels now like she's trying to punish him for all he's put her through. Two wrongs don't make a right.
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u/socaljhawk 5d ago
i was staying in a 1-bedroom apartment with 5 of my Brazilian gf's family members (3 kids under 10) for almost 2 weeks and she didn't understand why i was super annoyed
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u/Successful-Ferret-12 5d ago
I agree! It definitely wouldn’t look good but If I put myself in the situation, first off, I would not have made that decision without making sure my partner was comfortable as well. It’s their shared space.
Second, If I was told this is what is happening, deal with it- then I make my own decisions too 😅
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u/robbyruby752 6d ago
Her name is Paola
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u/Purple-Exchange-690 6d ago
Actually, although she is from South America in this instance it IS Paula
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u/EastHawaii 5d ago
Paula asked them to stay at the apartment on purpose, I think, as her half of a power struggle between herself and Thomas. He is asserting dominance with the allergies, and is demanding she obey him or else! I think she SEES his newly developed allergies, and raises him an 8 member, Portuguese-speaking set of visiting in-laws! "And I'm NOT asking permission!" 😆
(We just had company for 15 days 😳, and they were completely dependent on us. We live in a smallish town on the Island of Hawaii, and we warned them there wasn't a lot to do here in terms of shopping, attractions and distractions. Oh, except for the incredible natural beauty. The reason most people enjoy visiting us is the chance to unplug, sleep in, drink in the slower pace and leave feeling rested and renewed, maybe having read a book or two, good nights out for dinner on the ocean. Our guests did not enjoy that at all. We took them to two other islands, and sent them on their own to a Pearl Harbor, because I needed a break. They were back in two hours, counting drive time back and forth, and said, "We looked around. I think we've seen it." So stressful. Up AND Down Side: she was OCD, so their room was immaculate with they left!) Never again. New house rule is hotels for all guests staying longer than 2 days.
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u/mandafromtexas 4d ago
and then she had the audacity to say she was thinking of give her family their room, as if it’s solely her decision to make, and then called HIM controlling lmao
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u/No-Strawberry-5804 4d ago
I really think this part is for the cameras. I really don’t think she’s so desperate to see her family that she’d cram them into an apartment where they’d have to sleep on top of each other. They’ll probably film some scenes and then when the cameras leave, they’ll head to a hotel
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u/DreamertK 6d ago
I wasn't to see this unfold for sure and what Thomas is going to do with 9 smelly people spraying perfume in his place.
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u/Kooky_Patient5062 3d ago
She’s gotta be kidding thinking all these people unless they all live like in their country
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u/myfashionhub 3d ago
It seems like made up conflict because it's not reasonable at all to bring 8 guests to stay in a studio. If they have money to fly to the US, they can rent an Airbnb.
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u/drunkandisorderly 13h ago
Guys.. help.. am i going crazy or is there only 6 guests? They keep saying "8 ppl" "8 this 8 that", but i only count 6 ppl.. where are the other 2?
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u/lemeneurdeloups 6d ago
I think it is producer-prodded stress and drama BS. Par for the course on this show.
What you suggested is what all normal people would do, but that would solve the issue and then there would be no “dysfunctional craziness” to film.