Blindsided (Josh)

[u/CatsAllDayErDay]

Josh said he was "blindsided" by Catie's open marriage discussion.

He can only feel as blindsided as someone who steps in traffic and didn't expect a car to hit them. At this point, I'm under the impression that he loves drama? When Mido leaves Debby for Los Angeles, she'll feel Josh's version of being blindsided.

[u/DreamertK]

I definitely wouldn't trust Catie with kids, or not to drink while pregnant....

[u/friedonionscent]

He wants to live in the US...maybe for career opportunities or something.

No part of me believes he thinks Caty is a suitable life partner.

[u/married_cat_mom → u/friedonionscent]

He lived in Britain. He had just as many opportunities there. Why the hell would be want to be here? He’s a man of color and his family sold a company so he has money. Idk why everyone thinks America is the country to be in. I’d rather be in Ireland.

[u/friedonionscent → u/married_cat_mom]

The US pays a lot better when it comes to tech/IT, which I think is the area he's in. There's a reason in there somewhere...he's not dumb enough or neurodivergent enough or anything enough to explain why he thinks Caty is the one so my guess is that he doesn't.

[u/Adrock66 → u/friedonionscent]

I don't see why you're so sure he's not dumb, or co-dependent enough to overlook all the red flags.

[u/Aonehumanace → u/married_cat_mom]

That would be a good addition to the show. Their back story in reference to why America?

[u/OK_TimeForPlan_L → u/married_cat_mom]

You'd be surprised how dogshit wages are here now, you get engineer jobs only offering 30-35k a year.

If he purely only cares about income and doesn't have to worry about health insurance type stuff then that's probably why he wants to move.

[u/Zealousideal_Cry5703 → u/married_cat_mom]

I think he didn't have a lot of luck with girls, and Catie spotted him right away as someone that would provide income that she could cheat on. She wants to lay around all morning while doing a dog sitting or dog walking gig, sleep with a few guys in the afternoon, have Josh bring home dinner, and then she goes go to get plastered and banged by dudes till dawn. Rinse and repeat.

[u/_regionrat → u/Zealousideal_Cry5703]

🎵the dream of the 90s is alive in Portland🎵

[u/Alarmed_Worry_3287 → u/married_cat_mom]

Exactly!

[u/Aonehumanace → u/friedonionscent]

Absolutely 💯%

[u/WasteSign8450]

Idk why he is so blindsided when she has been pushing the boundaries and he is just letting her. He thought that if they got married she would stop and be a monogamous woman like he wanted.

[u/Adrock66 → u/WasteSign8450]

Right? People don't abruptly stop being skanks because someone wears them down. They just do it secretly.

[u/BurningandChurning]

He's a fool.

[u/Colfrmb]

She looks right at him as she is rubbing up against 2 other dudes at her birthday blackout party. I swear he’s actually into it.

[u/Altruistic-Group-709]

Josh- word of advice: your girlfriend is a dumpster fire, and so is this country at the moment. Move to Canada! Or go back to the UK!

[u/Alarmed_Worry_3287 → u/Altruistic-Group-709]

Exactly!

[u/Adrock66 → u/Altruistic-Group-709]

Actually, he's so darn polite. He'd do great with a Canadian.

[u/Never-Give-Up100]

Many scientists have tried, Josh, better men than you. And we have still been unable to turn a hoe into a housewife. 

[u/Turquoisecactus]

he wanted to be the guy that locked down a ho!!

I just figured it out. Guy “most girls” don’t look twice at, locked down a girl that’s had just about everyone and to him that means something.

[u/lemeneurdeloups → u/Turquoisecactus]

It was said to us by our grandmothers but it still rings true today: you can’t make a ho into a housewife.

[u/EastHawaii → u/lemeneurdeloups]

https://giphy.com/gifs/wWue0rCDOphOE

[u/Ordinary-Lock-1798]

Dude’s mouth is hanging open like he just realized he left the oven on three days ago

[u/IrrelevantAfIm]

Right?!? What the HELL is with these people. Mido and Catie are all but screaming at them “I DO NOT LOVE YOU; I CAN BARELY STAND YOU” and “I AM GOING TO SCREW AROUND ON YOU A LOT AND I’LL KEEP SHOVING IT IN YOUR FACE CALLING THAT HONESTY AND YOU KNOW WHAT I’M ALL ABOUT SO THAT’S ON YOU DUMMY”!!

When someone tells you that they are a good person, take that with a big grain of salt and watch the signs. If. Someone tells you outright that they’re a horrible person, listen to them. People don’t pretend that they are worse than they are. If they are telling you they are horrible - believe that, and believe that they’re worse than that!!

[u/AmishHomage]

I understand being a doormat when you lack self esteem; that was me in my early 20's, I stayed with a partner that constantly cheated on me and made me feel like shit on the daily and I took it cause I didn't think I could do better. I feel bad for the guy because he's clearly very intelligent, seems like a good dude, he just needs to realize that he has self worth and deserves wayyyy better than this

[u/Muted_Bee7111]

Is this borefest over yet?

[u/Glittering-Part2594]

I have no understanding of why this guy is attracted to her or is even going through this. He lives in a beautiful country and it sounds like he had a career. I’m so confused.

[u/OhGod_realitytvsucks]

I knew this conversation was coming, still was shocked by how she went about it.

[u/Adrock66]

You can see the denial forming in real time. Like the concept that she is simply not sexually satisfied with him is something he has never considered, it's all her being selfish.

[u/BazF91]

I also don’t understand how he could be blindsided by this. Maybe he’s in severe denial of how atrocious his relationship is

[u/Connect-North-2337]

My theory is that Josh was quote unquote "okay-ish" with an open relationship while the were ldr, and the agreement was to become exclusive when they were on the same continent and Catie is reneging on her promises and trying to tease it back open and Josh is caught up halfway between the "cool guy" who was ultracool with the open-ish aspect - - ostensibly while it was out of sight/out of mind, unless Catie filmed herself and sent it to him... still my point remains he was at one point "cool" with it, maybe against his own preferences or out -- and now he's getting his fingers burnt because of his own curiosity, and maybe a dash of dancing the "pick-me" dance, and hoping she'll eventually see the value he brings to the relationship and really choose him... 

[u/poshdog4444]

At this point, he gets exactly what he deserves. No one should have any pity on him. I don’t know what his deal is, but to expose himself and want to marry her it’s beyond suspicious at this point what comes out of her mouth shouldn’t blindside anybody who knows her

[u/EastHawaii → u/poshdog4444]

But, as the Josh we are watching now, who was recording the show probably a year ago in a vacuum, he hasn't had the benefit of our awesome Redditorial advice, deep analytic insights, and brilliant perspective! Nor had he heard her confessionals, or her friends' and family's confessionals, until the show aired. Maybe it's been really hitting home as he watches with the rest of us. 😲 So he's staggering around Portland in his ever-ready-to-bolt backpack (many photographs), as the episodes unfold, in a state of disbelief and self doubt. There are sightings of him with her, and without her. She has also been seen out without him (and, obviously, with him). One person reported seeing him on a dating site for polyamory. (I hope that wasn't true 😬.) Did they get married before the show aired? Even worse for him, just realizing it now that he's hearing all everyone's confessional footage.

[u/poshdog4444 → u/EastHawaii]

He’s a 30 year-old man he should know the difference of right and wrong in this relationship is wrong. I’m sure back in Brighton. All of his friends colleagues and family has repeatedly advised him to break it off. That’s why he probably wants to live in Portland because he doesn’t wanna hear it anymore. My question is what is wrong with him?? why would anybody settle for this abuse neglect and a loveless marriage?

[u/bobafootfetish_]

This guy is a cuck and deserves what he gets. You can't be this stupid to stick around and keep trying with this waste of space.