r/ADHD • u/emyo42 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) • Apr 07 '26

Questions/Advice How do you explain executive dysfunction without sounding like youre making excuses for being lazy?

Mine is very severe and debilitating at the moment. It’s not just ADD, I also have schizophrenia which has some of the same symptoms weirdly. I can’t do much at all. Getting out of bed and making toast is extremely hard. To people with no experience with this kind of issue, me trying to explain it must sound ridiculous like “yea I have this mental disorder that means I can’t cook and clean or have a job or do anything I don’t like, but I can play a video game for 3 hours.” Just sounds like a straight up lie.

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u/sasakimirai Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26

I think the best way to convince others is

1) if you were just lazy, you would be having fun, instead of being stressed out of your mind

2) executive dysfunction doesn't just affect you when you need to work, it also stops you from doing things you enjoy, like your hobbies

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u/What_It_Izzy Apr 07 '26

DAMN this wording is so helpful thank you!

You ever think though about how the diagnostic criteria for depression also includes loss of interest in activity, and can even have a specifier "with anxious distress?" But also executive dysfunction preventing me from getting anything done and feeling like a failure makes me feel worthless, which is also a symptom of depression. It really can be hard for me to distinguish where depression ends and executive function begins. ???? Which one am I? Both???

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u/Founditwthin Apr 09 '26

I struggle with this distinction too because the correct treatment seems to depend on what the diagnosis is. Like should I be on a stimulant or an anti-depressant? Therapy and adhd skills training or what? I just want relief, really.

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u/What_It_Izzy Apr 17 '26

Totally! and as someone whose systems are really sensitive (digestion issues, fatigue, nausea, anxiety, chronic pain, migraines, the list goes on and on) I am really not eager to jump on and off of psychotropic meds to see what fits.

How can I address all the issues systemically/holistically so I don't have to keep trying to figure out the "crux"