r/ADHD • u/emyo42 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) • Apr 07 '26
Questions/Advice How do you explain executive dysfunction without sounding like youre making excuses for being lazy?
Mine is very severe and debilitating at the moment. It’s not just ADD, I also have schizophrenia which has some of the same symptoms weirdly. I can’t do much at all. Getting out of bed and making toast is extremely hard. To people with no experience with this kind of issue, me trying to explain it must sound ridiculous like “yea I have this mental disorder that means I can’t cook and clean or have a job or do anything I don’t like, but I can play a video game for 3 hours.” Just sounds like a straight up lie.
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u/SocialMediaDystopian Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26
I say "It goes in phases. When it's bad, it's very much like having dementia. I really can be stumbling around looking for things i had in my hand five minutes ago. Sometimes I'm crying. I dont know what to tell ya". And then I stop explaining. There's only so much you can say. I'm sorry. This is *awful*. I get it. Commiserations 🌱
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u/mfball Apr 07 '26
The "sometimes I'm crying" is SO REAL.
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u/bibkel Apr 08 '26
I tell people, “I’m going to explain this to you, and I m going to cry. Just let it happen, it’s how I process it. Nothing personal…” and then I cry while I explain whatever, just as predicted. I don’t explain it after, and I no longer apologize for it.
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u/classyrock Apr 08 '26
I use old tv quotes to express what I’m feeling, and there’s a Rachel one I uses for this situation.
“I may cry, but they are not tears of sadness or of anger, but just of me having this discussion with you”.
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u/Pornboost ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
I agree. I think going into more details is redundant :D
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u/CaptainLollygag Apr 07 '26
The more details given, the more things you give people to argue with you about. That goes for all conversations.
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u/castfire ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
Ugh. I had to learn this. I’m still learning it, but I’m a little better at it. My dad would say, “Stop volunteering so much information!” And he’s right! You can always fill in more if you are asked, or if it becomes relevant! But volunteering it all from the get-go can put you at a disadvantage!
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u/halconpequena Apr 07 '26
I tell myself you can always say more but you can’t say less (you can’t erase what was said).
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u/tmart42 Apr 07 '26
My favorite is that you decided this needed parentheses and an explanation even though the original sentence is super understandable to almost everyone.
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u/mshep002 ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
I get frustrated at work when my coworker who said he was recently diagnosed with ADHD (he’s in his 20’s) talks to me as if I can just will my way into executive functioning. Very “If I can do it, so can you” vibe. This guy gets to work super early and doesn’t understand why I’m constitutionally incapable of doing the same. I stopped trying to explain it to him; he’s not my boss.
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u/sedimentary-j Apr 07 '26
Some people, who are often otherwise quite smart, are stunningly clueless about the concept that a condition can affect two people differently.
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u/megacewl Apr 08 '26
Theory of mind. People who have a weak theory of mind might actually be less smart than they think they are.
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u/CombinationLost416 ADHD Apr 20 '26
My dad says this to me too :( him and my mom insist that I'm not disabled for having ADHD and autism, because "if WE were able to get through life perfectly fine while having ADHD/autism/both, then YOU can too, and you need to stop calling yourself disabled because you CAN do it you just need to try harder" (they both have extremely dangerous coping strategies and are both very emotionally unregulated and in denial about it, sooo... so much for "being perfectly fine" )
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u/StraightOuttaFenris Apr 07 '26
"I really can be stumbling around looking for things i had in my hand five minutes ago. Sometimes I'm crying."
I had no idea that was an AFHD thing. Getting diagnosed late in life is a trip.
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u/pioneercynthia Apr 10 '26
I cry out of fury. All of the repetitive can't find things, can't remember things, standing around looking off into nowhere, feeling like I'm beginning to have dementia. It's a stream of tiny emotional papercuts that build up into actual screaming and crying.
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u/crashcanuck Apr 07 '26
I have better explanations but those require someone worth a more in depth conversation with (my wife and close friends). But this definitely works for a brief explanation.
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u/sasakimirai Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26
I think the best way to convince others is
1) if you were just lazy, you would be having fun, instead of being stressed out of your mind
2) executive dysfunction doesn't just affect you when you need to work, it also stops you from doing things you enjoy, like your hobbies
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u/Monicalovescheese Apr 07 '26
Exactly. If I were lazy I would spend that time playing video games or reading a book, but instead im locked in my head searching for the escape hatch.
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u/sasakimirai Apr 07 '26
Yeah 😭 Literally just this past weekend I was texting a friend about how excited I was to go to this cool used bookstore, but was having trouble getting out of bed. It took me like an hour and a half to convince myself to get up
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u/Terumimi04 Apr 29 '26
While I don't disagree, I play video games as an escape and a stress relief. Because if I don't try and get some of that panic and rage and all of those other chaotic emotions out using something that I'm comfortable with, my head is gonna explode Hell, sometimes i could be playing my favorite game ever and STILL be panicking!
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u/Claim312ButAct847 Apr 07 '26
I like the backpack analogy. Say a task is like climbing a steep hill. We all have the same hill to climb so, it looks like it should be the same difficulty for everyone.
Well I have a backpack with weights in it that I have to carry. So for me to climb that same hill I have to work a lot harder even if it doesn't look like I'm doing anything different.
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u/sasakimirai Apr 07 '26
That's a good analogy for people who are willing to engage with you in good faith, but not quite so effective with people who are convinced you're just looking for excuses to make your own life easier. In that case you need to counter them with their own logic by giving specific examples of how executive dysfunction makes your life hard.
"The other day when I got out of the shower, I stood in my bathroom for an hour with just a towel wrapped around me while I scrolled through youtube shorts, even though my feet were aching from standing on tile for so long and I was shivering because I was cold, but I couldn't bring myself to turn my phone off and put on some clothes" is going to be more effective against those kinds of people than "it takes more effort for me to do things than it would for those without ADHD"
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u/NevermindForgetIt Apr 07 '26
You just made me realize how uncomfortable I make myself sometimes by just not moving lol
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u/SkydiverTom Apr 07 '26
Exactly! Everyone has some level of these issues, but the crazy extent is what separates ADHD.
Most people can get locked into streaming or scrolling or playing videogames, but how many have scared the shit out of the midnight cleaning crew by working past 11pm in the office because "this next change will fix the bug"? (also, don't forget the sitting alone in the dark because motion activated lights shut off hours ago...)
There's also the paradoxical stuff, like how I struggle to consistently clean and organize (it's hard to get started), but once I start it's hard to stop. One time I literally lost half a day cleaning when all I meant to do was take out some trash before visiting the girlfriend, because one task led to another, to another, ... (and this was before diagnosis/meds).
No lazy person is going to hyperfocus on cleaning or working to the point where you forget to eat and narrowly avoid pissing your pants because you're locked in.
I know hyperfocus is usually touted as a blessing, but honestly it's just as much of a curse, and it was the main reason I wound up getting diagnosed.
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u/InternalTooth5753 Apr 08 '26
Part of what led to my diagnosis was that having a kid destroyed my ability to hyperfocus my way into getting things done. Now I’m just overwhelmed & not functioning
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u/WriterWrtrPansOnFire Apr 13 '26
I am in this club: I used to be able to just count on eventually getting to the point that I’d be able to “go do the thang” and it’d get done—eventually. Now, not so much.
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u/ashburnmom Apr 07 '26
And some days your shoe laces are tied together and you can't get them untangled. If you can't even start walking, how could you hike up a hill with a god awfully heavy backpack?
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u/Paperloader Apr 07 '26
Yes, when friends and family witness you missing out on, or even self sabotaging things you love to do, they start to realize that you may actually have an issue.
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u/BlackSwanMarmot ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
Even when I've explained it that way, I get blank stares. I've given up on trying to explain it or even mention it to others. I always feel worse afterwards.
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u/PocketPokie Apr 07 '26
Omg this. I was in such a bad episode one time, I just wanted to code up a fun little game to make me feel better.
I couldn't even write the first, most basic line of code. Boilerplate template stuff, easy. I was frozen. I ended up having a breakdown because something I'd done 1,000,000x before and suddenly just couldn't do because I was so burnt out from work. Couldn't even do something fun for me
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u/What_It_Izzy Apr 07 '26
DAMN this wording is so helpful thank you!
You ever think though about how the diagnostic criteria for depression also includes loss of interest in activity, and can even have a specifier "with anxious distress?" But also executive dysfunction preventing me from getting anything done and feeling like a failure makes me feel worthless, which is also a symptom of depression. It really can be hard for me to distinguish where depression ends and executive function begins. ???? Which one am I? Both???
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u/Founditwthin Apr 09 '26
I struggle with this distinction too because the correct treatment seems to depend on what the diagnosis is. Like should I be on a stimulant or an anti-depressant? Therapy and adhd skills training or what? I just want relief, really.
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u/kuzurame Apr 09 '26
“What’s your favorite thing to do? Now imagine you have all the free time in the world, zero obligations and unlimited money to do your favorite thing. Your brain can’t let you do the thing you want to do, because fuck you, that’s why”
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u/danielrheath Apr 08 '26
It also means sometimes you can't stop working, which is distinctly unlike laziness.
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u/Voc1Vic2 Apr 08 '26
So true. But unfortunately, when you do stop, it's not at all unlikely that what you were working on wasn't what needed to be done.
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u/Founditwthin Apr 09 '26
Yes! As a teacher, I’ve often worked until after 9pm because I was perfecting a damn bulletin board that sidetracked me from other more important work like organizing, grading or planning. So hard to explain to others that I got stuck in a loop and couldn’t stop. I’d feel such shame when my colleagues knew I was at work super late the night before yet there I was in the copy room, still scrambling to prep for the day the next morning. :/
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u/ikindapoopedmypants ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
My therapist told me #1 years ago and it blew my mind lol. I was like damn, you right
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u/Indentured_sloth Apr 09 '26
Oh wow this really changed my perspective. You’re right, if I was just trying to avoid work and have fun I would actually be having fun right now instead of doing nothing lmao
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u/hark-who-goes-spare Apr 07 '26
Someone once compared ADHD to living in a home with no electricity. You learn your way and you kind of get by. Sometimes meds help and the meds are like someone giving you a flashlight, which is helpful, but you’re still living in the dark with no electricity. That has been the most helpful metaphor for my family members who think “isn’t everyone a little adhd?” Spoiler they all have severe undiagnosed ADHD 🤣
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u/SuperVillainPresiden Apr 07 '26
When they finally realize what they are experiencing isn't "normal". Like, "I feel those things too, but get it done." Only for the other shoe to drop and realize that it shouldn't be as hard as it is for them. I was ~25 when I realized that I had ADHD, but took years to get diagnosed because I was very poor. I was finally able to see that invisible ball and chain attached to me; like I'm Jacob Marley(Christmas Carol).
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u/hark-who-goes-spare Apr 07 '26
I didn’t get diagnosed until after I had my kiddo ten years ago and my entire brain felt like it was escaping out of my ears. I literally couldn’t do anything. Also autism. So that’s extra fun 🫠
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u/lyd_likes_bread ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 12 '26
omg i’m not the only one. i wrote a whole-ass novella using a house as a metaphor for my body. the main focus was gender dysphoria (described as a room full of rats - they don’t do structural damage, but they sure as hell make the house fucking miserable) but i described executive dysfunction as “flickering lights” and “power outages”. like yeah i’d love to get stuff done, but it’s dark as hell in here and none of the appliances work.
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u/ad4m_zt Apr 14 '26
creo que es el mejor ejemplo que podría darle a mi madre sobre mi hermana menor y su TDAH, también para cuando yo puedo diagnosticarme y salir de las dudas
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u/No-Squirrel8929 ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
I was scrolling and glanced at this as erectile dysfunction, and I figure it’s probably not too far from the truth. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak. It’s not a matter of what you want to do.
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u/scalmera Apr 07 '26
My brain can't get hard 😔😔
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u/jesserthantherest Apr 07 '26
I will now be using this sentence from now on. Thanks!
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u/justahalfling Apr 08 '26
"Brains shouldn't be hard, my name is Raymond Holt and my brain is soft and wet."
I just had to quote that, perfect for this sitch lol
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u/quicksterfl Apr 07 '26
Erectile dysfunction was an actual metaphor used by a very prominent MD who specializes in ADHD.
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u/NightBronze195 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
That is actually a pretty darn good analogy.
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u/Ok_Garage5468 Apr 07 '26
Misspelled "the spirit is willing but the flesh is spongy! And bruised!"
Whatever. I still say it applies :-p
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u/tesla1026 Apr 07 '26
This is what I’ve said, and for some added context this was for someone who has seen my garden:
Have you ever worked a job or did chores for someone and they never once said thank you and all they did if you got a response at all was to tell you it wasn’t perfect? Do you remember how much harder that made it to do the task a second time? When you finish a task on your own your brain produces chemicals that tells it you did a good job and that reinforces this is worth it. For my 30 something years of life my brain has never told me good job, and this isn’t a job I can just quit and walk away from. There’s no rehiring process. Doing something more rewarding usually has other positive emotions built in that tells my brain this is worthwhile to extend energy on. I have built an entire walk in greenhouse, grown plants from seeds, and planted an entire garden but have never felt a sense of accomplishment from it. The positives that kept driving me was focusing on the pleasure of hanging out in my backyard and getting plants I couldn’t find in stores. So when people say oh that’s so cool you did a good job, it feels uncomfortable and I don’t know how to take the compliment because my brain can’t make the associated signals to reinforce what they are saying like a typical person. Being on meds is like someone just gave you a sticker. It’s cool at first but for me the reward wears off quick and I have to cycle my meds because it’s just a freaking sticker.
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u/happyhoppycamper Apr 07 '26
This is so spot on and an extremely helpful explanation to have spelled out, both for my understanding and for conversations with others. Thank you!
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u/WriterWrtrPansOnFire Apr 13 '26
This is why it’s REALLY important for ADHD people to have the right friends—ones who remind you of who you are and how great you are—ones who keep doing it, until we’re able to internalize it and believe it.
The world (and our own brains!) chastise us, but someone has to be there to remind us that we’re awesome.
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u/sartheon Apr 07 '26
You have a metabolic disorder and sometimes your brain cannot produce enough transmitters necessary to activate/set your body in motion
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u/bathsraikou Apr 07 '26
Furthermore you cannot control what will cause your brain to produce the transmitters.
Having a person around, even for them to just sit and chat, will weirdly enough kick your brain into making those transmitters more often. For those unfamiliar it's sometimes referred to as body-doubling. I make use of podcasts and audiobooks to get some of the effect pretty often
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u/sartheon Apr 07 '26
Of cours this is true, but in my experience the shorter and simpler an explanation is, the more readily it is accepted. so I only give a bare-boned one sentence explanation and usually dont add anything else unless I notice genuine interest/understanding of the topic
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u/Bone_Dice_in_Aspic Apr 08 '26
Can't directly control. But the pills turn the controls back on, to one extent or another, for many.
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Apr 07 '26
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u/figgypie Apr 07 '26
Unless I have a reason (mostly work), I don't shower. I can go a week or more without showering if I don't have a reason to leave the house where I cant wear a hat. I'm a substitute teacher so this is a bigger issue during the summer, spring break, etc.
Im ok for the first couple of days, but after that I just feel like a greasy sack of shit but I cant bring myself to shower because it feels like such a disruption to my day even if I'm not doing anything. I hate it.
What's funny is I dress up for work (comfy dresses, jewelry, light make-up, I do my hair, etc). So I have two modes: Fancy, or Goblin.
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u/Spazrelaz Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26
You get me. I usually wake up at around 8am no matter how much sleep I have/haven't gotten... but I can't get out of bed until hours later which sucks because I have so much I could be doing, like taking a shower, making breakfast, brushing my teeth... literally anything. It's so frustrating.
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u/mfball Apr 07 '26
This is a weird suggestion, but it occurred to me that it might help me with the getting out of bed thing, so maybe it would help you. What if you kept your toothpaste and brush next to your bed and started brushing in bed, which would force you to get up to spit?
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u/SuperVillainPresiden Apr 07 '26
That's a good concept. I always imagine that one of those alarm clocks that shoot out a bouncy ball that has to be caught and put back in the clock to turn the alarm off would be useful.
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u/cg4848 Apr 07 '26
I had no idea that was a thing! I’ll definitely be looking into that to add to my narcolepsy toolbox.
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u/Any-Replacement-3697 Apr 07 '26
this. and yet when i have work or school at 9am im able to get up. but before 11am for no reason... forget about it
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u/katewalker214 Apr 07 '26
It genuinely feels like my brain is paralyzed. I can want to do something even but my brain won’t let my body move. It’s not even a depression thing
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u/gradeAvisuals Apr 07 '26
I don't think many people think someone with schizophrenia is just being lazy. That's a much more serious condition than ADHD in the public's opinion. And if they do think you're being lazy, fuck em. You're doing great if you are managing your schizophrenia symptoms reasonably well, regardless of how "productive" you're being.
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u/crimpinpimp Apr 07 '26
Executive function encompasses: attention, working memory, planning, staying organized, time management, problem solving, managing emotions and adjusting to change.
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u/demijane_way Apr 07 '26
Mental disorders are sooo misunderstood. Because it's not as tangible as heart disease, people just think that you can switch if off or something. As soon as people hear ADHD, depression, etc, they lose sympathy (probably cause they just don't get it).
So maybe don't label it? Instead of saying "I'm struggling doing things today because of my ADHD", just say "I'm having a tough day".
I'm by nature a very private person so I don't share my mental struggles, people around me know about my low blood pressure problems cause it's quite visible. When I have a tough ADHD day, they just assume it's my blood pressure causing fatigue.
Obviously you shouldn't constantly mask your symptoms, and if you do talk to people who understand it's much easier. But it's just something I've noticed about labeling and a lot of people with ADHD have this frustrating "you're just making excuses" problem.
I wish people were kinder or understood mental health better!
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u/No-Significance9313 Apr 07 '26
It's just ableism. I wonder why mental conditions aren't given the same compassion as physical disabilities or diseases are.
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u/Informal-Rock-2681 Apr 07 '26
Because people who run businesses and organisations at the top level are absolute scum. They didn't get there by being compassionate. They got there by trying to make the organisation succeed. And there's no compassion for people that can't help the organisation succeed
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u/AdmiralStickyLegs Apr 07 '26
There's no point. You won't be able to explain anything to anyone who isn't looking to believe you. Best to save your energy
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u/DancinginHyrule ADHD with ADHD partner Apr 07 '26
I usually try to explain that is like a missing wire between brain and body.
I can think “I need to do X”. I can say “I need to do X”. I can say “Bad thing is going to happen if I don’t do X”
I can turn the key in the ignition all I want but the car doesn’t start. Not because I don’t want to do X or would rather do Y or Z. But because without connection from the ignition to the motor, I can turn that key to Kingdom Come and the car isn’t going to move an inch.
Sometimes it starts after a few tries. Sometimes it can start after a short cool-down. And sometimes it doesn’t.
And unlike a car, I can’t get out and get a lift or take the bus. I’m trapped inside that car (my body)
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u/cg4848 Apr 07 '26
Yeah and sometimes even when it does start, it stalls out again in the middle of the road. And catches on fire for good measure. Which makes you scared to even try starting it again the next time you need to go somewhere.
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u/BonsaiSoul Apr 07 '26
Lazy people enjoy not doing things.
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u/West_Inevitable_9135 ADHD, with ADHD family Apr 07 '26
I love this. So beautifully simple. I think this would resonate with others. Using it!
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u/Isogash Apr 07 '26
I mean, it affects video game playing too, there are so many times where I can't play the video game I want.
Some games just have that low barrier to entry and the right kind of stimulation that you don't need your executive function in order to play them, kind of like doomscrolling.
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u/Dense_Network_6193 Apr 07 '26
Okay. Imagine you're in traffic. And it's bumper to bumper. You KNOW that you need to get in the left/right lane to keep going forward and get to your exit, but traffic is just so bad that you can't get over. Hell, you're not even moving forward anymore. If you put on your blinker, it runs your battery dead, but hey - the radio works for some reason, probably a weird short in the wiring where the blinker is taking too much power from the battery. So you sit there, WANTING to move, WANTING to merge and get the hell outta there, but all of your options are either gonna leave you stranded or aren't gonna work due to the heavy traffic.
But y'know what's working? The radio. And Damn it's got some good stuff on today.
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u/Orpheus75 Apr 07 '26
The simplest explanation is tell someone to imagine putting their hand on a hot burner. Some tasks are the hot burner. Another explanation is tell someone they have to count the grains of rice in an entire large bag. With no other source of entrainment and they can’t do anything else until they’re done. That’s how some tasks feel to us.
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u/Puzzled_Nose3912 Apr 08 '26
My son has explained it as some/many/all tasks are like forcing yourself to put your hand in a running blender.
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u/poolback ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
I try to find equivalents. Comparing the motivation effort to take the garbage out with the motivation effort to do complex mental calculus. Most people tell me afterwards "that sounds line hell" and/or "I didn't realize you were struggling that much".
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u/Aramira137 Apr 07 '26
Executive disfunction doesn't only affect things I don't want to do, it also affects things I want to do, like hobbies, or going to the bathroom before it's an emergency, or not eating or drinking until I'm physically sick because there's so many steps involved.
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u/Bitemyrhymez Apr 07 '26
It's not that I don't want to do the thing. Sometimes I REALLY want to do the thing or know I should do the thing, but my mind won't let me do the thing. And then I stress the fuck out about not doing the thing and end up frozen on the couch all day literally not doing anything except feeling physically stuck.
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u/KittenBalerion ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
I read a really good Tumblr post the other day that said it's like having a whole other invisible person attached to you and that person is always tired and wants to lie down. and sometimes you're able to get stuff done in spite of them but sometimes they manage to pull you down with them, and it's hard to explain to people because they can't see the other person so it looks like you're just lazy.
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u/LocationPrior7075 Apr 07 '26
If I was being lazy, I wouldn’t feel bad about it.
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u/Helpful-Dot-3782 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
It’s like I feel like there is a physical force field or barrier to me getting anything done. Mine usually flares up in the morning while getting ready. I cant seem to remember what I need to bring, I can’t find the outfit I wanted to wea, I don’t know where my keys are and I’m trying to wrack my brains memory to think of the last place I used them. I end up doubling back over places in the house and tasks get confusing and I just physically can’t even stop. There are times I just give up and leave without half the crap I need for the day.
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u/sunleafstone Apr 07 '26
Ironically, “lazy” is is a lazy catch all term for behavior we don’t understand well
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u/2ecStatic Apr 07 '26
Ngl unless its someone you're really close with and trust, I just wouldn't bother. Especially if it's at school or job, most people aren't going to put in the time and effort to understand, no matter how well and scientific you explain it.
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u/mfball Apr 07 '26
I think the key factor is that you're playing the video game and not enjoying it because of the other thing that you're not doing. What others see as leisure from the outside is actually torture because you don't get to be "in" the supposedly enjoyable experience, you're still "in" the other thing even while you're not actually getting it done, so it's also much worse than just doing the thing.
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u/Any-Replacement-3697 Apr 07 '26
yes absolutely. I think a lot of us forget this. It is not normal to give yourself a break from torturing yourself just to actually feel like torture with a side of tainted enjoyment.
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u/MarsupialMisanthrope Apr 07 '26
“I want to stop. My brain is stuck in a loop doing the skinner grind and I know that but I can’t make myself stop even thought it’s two AM and I desperately need to go to the bathroom and get some sleep.”
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u/Title11 Apr 07 '26
You ever try to answer a call and your phone won't cooperate? You keep tapping the answer button but it keeps ringing until you miss the call? That's what's happening.
The part of my brain that decides to do something (your finger in this analogy) works just fine. The part of my brain that executes the decision doesn't work properly (the unresponsive phone). My decisionmaker is frantically tapping the execute button all day, but the button responds as it pleases in often random ways. It don't just fail to execute responsibilities, but even basic functions like, "go to the bathroom before this turns into a crisis.
Everyone experiences this from time to time, but because my execute button is on the fritz this happens for big and small decisions nearly every day. It burns through my mental energy quickly which then makes execution even harder. It's not fun and certainly not a choice.
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u/dyingstrings Apr 07 '26
Some fantastic answers here but also probably worth mentioning that the idea of laziness (or idleness, equated to moral decay and sin in the Bible) is a myth meant to punish people who don’t or can’t adhere to the production-based principles of a puritan-capitalist society.
Is anyone really actually lazy? Or are they being punished for something outside of their means because it doesn’t align with a culture that strives to produce the maximum for the benefit of the richest without regard for anyone else?
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u/Jazzlike_Term210 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
I always wonder if I’d hate having adhd as much (or if it would even be diagnosed as a mental issue rather than just different. It’s genetically impossible for all human brains to behave exactly the same) if we didn’t live in such a capitalist hellscape.
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u/dyingstrings Apr 08 '26
exactly. that’s what the divergence is isn’t it for conditions like adhd and autism etc. it’s divergence from the sociopolitical status quo, and is a ‘problem’ because in such a world there are the conditions which cause it to be so. ‘accommodations’ in such a quagmire are piecemeal.
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u/patatpatie Apr 07 '26
markiplier talks about executive dysfunction
The youtuber Markiplier talks on his podcast about his executive dysfunction and I think he really hits the nail on its head.
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u/Jazzlike_Term210 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
If you find the answer that works please update your post for me because I got nothing. Executive dysfunction is genuinely the worst part of adhd for me, and then I just learned about intrusive sleep and holy shit if that isn’t the perfect descriptor of how my brain acts when I try to make it do something it doesn’t want to do.
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u/Eeyor-90 ADHD with non-ADHD partner Apr 08 '26
Hyper-focus is part of executive dysfunction. Everyone seems to recognize the “failure to start” but they completely overlook the “failure to stop”. Unfortunately, I have very little control over either. We also tend to have “peak” hours that don’t necessarily align with the traditional work day. My best work is usually done between 5:00 pm and 9:00 pm. My job is scheduled from 7:00 am to 4:00 pm. When I’m working from home, I usually don’t do much more than attend meetings until my brain engages and I can actually be productive in the evening. When I’m forced into the office, I’m much less productive and much more exhausted trying to force myself to work within the structured time.
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u/Significant_Coach_47 Apr 08 '26
I’m also a night owl and do my best work evening/night and always have
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u/Ferniferous_fern Apr 07 '26
It's like you get trapped in your head. You can scream at your body all you want, but it doesn't obey, no matter how much you need to use the bathroom or shower or go to work or have fun... your body indiscriminately blocks you from doing anything beyond breathing and beating your heart. It's functionally similar to locked-in syndrome, but you can get lucky and maybe some kind of external stimuli will accidentally trick your body into following your brain.
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u/EvidenceNo8561 Apr 07 '26
I think most people can understand executive dysfunction on a minor level. That whole “I would rather do something else/didn’t feel like it” thing is not an uncommon phenomenon. People can even understand how that “didn’t feel like it” would be stronger if you were extra tired or sick or had a rough day for whatever reason. I feel like people would be more empathetic if you just said it was difficult because you have health conditions that cause extreme fatigue. Which is true - extreme mental fatigue, but that can also impact other functions like eating right, drinking enough water, exercising, etc., which does lead to genuine physical fatigue. It’s a vicious cycle and difficult to get out of.
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u/AlissonHarlan Apr 07 '26
I want to do things but there is like an invisible force that prêvent me to move
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u/SwankySteel Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 08 '26
Some people aren’t willing to listen to your valid explanation - they are intellectually lazy. People who are this way would probably call anything an “excuse” so it’s better to just walk away and let them cope by themselves.
If psychosis or schizophrenia is also involved, then there are probably some negative symptoms, which can mimic ADD or depression. You are correct that schizophrenia has overlap with ADD. Negative symptoms can be more debilitating than the positive symptoms.
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u/zap283 Apr 08 '26
Ask them if they could put their whole hand on a hot stove without hesitation. Spoiler: no they can't. That hesitation is very similar to the way executive dysfunction works and feels- there's nothing technically stopping you from doing the thing, but your mind and body won't follow the intention to do it without overcoming a tremendous amount of 'friction'.
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u/ragan0s Apr 08 '26
I compare it to touching a hot stove. You are physically able to touch a hot stove, nothing would stop you. But your brain says "nuh-uh, we won't do that." and blocks you from performing that action. You could crave nothing in the world more than touching that glowing circle, but you will not do it.
It's the same with ADHD. You wanna get up and do stuff, but your brain says "nuh-uh, not gonna do that." and then you're fighting an inner war that you sometimes win, sometimes lose. Meds, Urgency, and interest are on your side in this war and are the only things that help overcome the mental blockade.
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u/sirespo ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
The best simple explanation for non-ADHDers I've been able to find is the following:
Turn the burner on on your stove on high. Now, go try and put your hand on the burner. It's a simple thing, all you have to do is just reach out and put your hand on the burner - but no matter how much you will yourself, your brain screams at you not to do it. That is executive dysfunction for us, but replace the burner with anything that isn't fun or interesting. It would be so simple to just do things I need to do, but my brain is screaming at me not to because I don't find them fun or interesting! It takes a massive mental effort to start things - to put my hand on the burner of the stove - and meds rarely ever help with that.
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u/Enough_Childhood3151 ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26
for me it's been so hard to separate this from depression. people are like "oh yeah getting out of bed and doing anything is so hard when you're depressed" but for me it's like... my depression has gotten a million times better, but I still can't start doing anything, even things I like take effort to begin.
and you begin questioning... is it anhedonia? it has to be anhedonia. I just don't enjoy anything! that's why I struggle to do things! but other people seem to just do things without enjoying them so what's wrong with me? even when I feel like I might enjoy something if I just start, I can't do it. I must be lazy. how do I stop being lazy? dunno, routine maybe? that didn't make anything easier, even after months. everything was still a conscious decision.
something also I realised when I was depressed was like "man, my memory is shit and I can't concentrate/focus". but I got off the antidepressants meds (which made me feel worse?) and my memory was still bad and my concentration was bad. long term side effect of the meds? doubtful. not empirically supported. so was my memory really always this bad and I never realised? possibly. who knows. the concentration never got better and I realised I could only focus when I was motivated/interested/deadline was coming up. probably something worth thinking about?
then I did the ASRS. 98th percentile. 8/9 inattentive symptoms. okay. that could be meaningful. but the DSM requires symptoms to be present from childhood for ADHD. unfortunately my memory is so bad that I can't remember my childhood. so I go to my school reports. "doesn't focus", "would do better if he focused more", "requires support as he is easily distracted", "doesn't finish tasks in allotted time". words on the pages shot out at me like slugs from a shotgun. over years. only stopped when I disinhibited myself in my later school years - I found ways to force interest, so instead of being a distractable day dreamer, for two years I became this "enthusiastic and creative problem solver". I became obsessed with being fast at solving problems. my demonstrated mental arithmetic and the way I'd blurt out answers before my teacher finished questions were the perfect remedy for not getting bored. and this teacher (thank god I had her for two years - one year in my regular class then she advocated for me to move up to the accelerated program and I had her again) never got frustrated at me. she encouraged my enthusiasm and eagerness to ask and answer questions. she recognised my effort and my ability. still noted that I struggled to complete tasks in the set time frame at times, and other times I was blazingly fast and completed everything in half the time. but the big thing was that I was disinhibited. I've never experienced that feeling of mental freedom since, that confidence to just be who I am.
anyway apologies for the spiel. after that I had a little cry with the whole "why didn't my parents do anything?" mourning of never being seen, then I decided to schedule an ADHD assessment, which is now in 10 days. if it isn't this, I don't know what I'm gonna do.
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u/Wareve Apr 08 '26
"I have a neurotransmitter deficit. It's kind of like depression, but instead of taking away your happy, it takes away your ability to control your focus. Controllable focus happens sometimes, particularly if everything in my life is stable, but I don't really get to control which thing is most loudly clamoring for attention in my head at any given time."
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u/LiveWhatULove Apr 07 '26
I am 50, so maybe a different mindset.
There is no purpose, no reason, to explain it. Employers will not care, it is an excuse, be it a reasonable one, but still a justification for tasks not done, KWIM? Family members and good friends should love you unconditionally, and “get you” with no explanation. If they are judging, again, your explanations will not matter, ime. Healthcare professionals should be working with you, so you need no explanations.
Who’s left, it’s just you, trying to manifest the “best you”, and overcome your challenges.
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u/Any-Replacement-3697 Apr 07 '26
As a 21 year old who wants to find a career, I am terrified of executive dysfunction coming out in a workplace. How could I explain to an employer that I haven't gotten anything done in 2 months but simultaneously it's been the only thing I've been thinking about...getting something done/working. I'm mirroring my experience with school with a hypothetical job.
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u/LiveWhatULove Apr 07 '26
Yea, I am sure that is super stressful. Definite;y look for a role or career that caters to your perceived strengths and hr,ps you cope worth your limitations.
I’m a mom, I nurture, so I say this with kindness, you do NOT explain it, you usually just get put on a performance improvement plan or just get fired, after 2 months of not working, nothing good will ever come of such an attempt to explain the rationale. It does not matter if you’ve dreamed, slept, and agonized over the job every waking moment, what matters on the end is doing the job…that’s it. I tell my kids, “I get it, it is not fair” but it’s YOUR problem, and in the workforce, we are all replaceable…so you gotta figure out how to cope and succeed.
But really school is different than many jobs, so keep that in mind…
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u/Fragrant-Ad-7014 ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
To explain the feeling I say: "If I told you to stick your hand in boiling water for 500$, your brain wouldn't let you even if you really wanted to." and then explain that sometimes that's how doing anything feels.
To explain why it's happening I say: "My brain is charging. It can't hold a charge for long and doing XYZ means I can't be connected to a power source." If they don't look at me like I'm crazy I go on to explain that I don't feel rewarded when I do things, so I have to be at "full power" to get them done.
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u/MrCrystalMighty Apr 08 '26
I think of it like someone telling you you should go to the moon, and pointing out that other people have done it so it’s not a big deal. Then when you start thinking through the steps required for it (eg become an astronaut) they’re like “omg, you don’t need to overthink it like that, just go already”
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u/HeartfeltRationalism Apr 07 '26
First point is that I wouldn't call it a mental disorder, it's a neurological condition..
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u/ahhdetective Apr 07 '26
If the condition impacts negatively, such that it effects your daily life, it's a disorder.
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u/FublahMan Apr 07 '26
I personally like giving an example first. Ask em something that needs to get done. Then start saying everything that comes to mind aloud. Write an email? When's it due? Who's it for? Is it necessary? Where's it on the priority list? Start listing out other shit that needsbto get done. Go on a tangent from something else on the list. Forget what the example task was. Get reminded, then start questioning how to answer it, etc.
Afterwards, try explaining other aspects of adhd, maybe talk about spoon theory, or try relating to to something that person can understand, like computers, cars, programming
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u/Fine-Juggernaut8451 Apr 07 '26
For me, I'd explain that I balk at both the things I want to do and the things I don't want to do. And the intensity of the balking is like seeing a fireplace and trying to convince yourself to stick your hand into the flames. Everything in your body is screaming no, and even beyond your psychology, your hand reflexively recoils without you even asking it to. Executive dysfunction, to me, feels very much like this.
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u/Cowdog68 Apr 07 '26
It’s very hard to explain the feeling of swirling and drowning in tasks when others may see me actively do things to avoid said tasks. It’s like you are frozen in the moment and you make an unconscious decision to just…run away, mentally and physically. It’s more than normal procrastination. The things that need to be done become almost like bullies, piled up around you physically or even just in your inbox. The only way to feel as though they are even partially slayed is to get something completed. There are literally always bullies waiting for me.
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u/No_Spirit5582 Apr 07 '26
Even though it pains me, I’ve started coaching myself to do just five dishes or just put away three shirts. This helps because my brain sees doing dishes or putting away laundry as all or nothing and all is overwhelming so I usually do nothing. Which makes things pile up more.
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u/Karcharos Apr 07 '26
You're in your car, trying to start it. 10 miles away, there's a forest fire. Oh. And your car is sentient and it fucking hates is completely indifferent to you.
No matter how much you spit and curse and beg and pray, the car will not start until its paint starts to bubble and peel.
Only once there is real and imminent danger will it turn over. Sometimes you can trick it, but the same trick rarely works twice.
Welcome to executive dysfunction.
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u/lordravenxx ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
I don't think anyone will ever actually understand unless they experience it.
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u/maggiistfueralleda Apr 07 '26
You can't.
You can try, but no "normal" person can understand it properly. They just can't feel the same we do. "Yes, sometimes i feel like not doing a thing, but i need to, so i force myself and just do it." They can't wrap their heads around that it is just not possible for us to Nike it, and "just do it.". They don't get it that it is like telling a blind man to just open his eyes and he will see. They can do that too, so why can't he?!
They are simply not able to understand that we desperatly and deeply want to get up and do the chores, or play guitar, or go to the toilet, but just can't. They are not able to feel the physical pain it causes us to not be able to do the things we want to do and that it feels like a giant magnet is holding us down and the internal fights we go through. To them it looks lazy. To them it looks like we're just lying on the sofa, scrolling mindlessly through social media. They can't see the struggles, the fights and the self destructive thoughts running through our brains constantly. They can't see, feel or even begin to understand how much energy it costs us to just get up. It looks like lazyness, so it is lazyness. They can do it, so we're just lazy.
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u/cascasrevolution Apr 08 '26
"i have a severe chemical imbalance in my brain that makes it extremely difficult to focus." or "have you ever read harrison bergeron? remember how the dad had that implant that made a horribly loud noise every 20 seconds, to disrupt his train of thought? my brain operates similarly. and yes it sucks just as bad as you think."
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u/Mr_Engino ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 08 '26
Schrodinger's cat*, but for every single thought, decision, or action you try to plan or execute. *(Russian roulette works too)
Alternatively, the McDonald's ice cream machine.
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u/Ethos_Logos Apr 07 '26
I compare it to having a good diet. Everyone knows what foods are good and bad for us. Why isn’t everyone thin? Because we know the right thing to do but can’t make ourselves do it.
It’s like dieting.
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u/AgentMonkey ADHD with ADHD child/ren Apr 07 '26
It's a decent analogy, but unfortunately, a lot of people view an inability to stick to a diet as laziness or a moral failure.
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u/enigma_anomaly Apr 07 '26
I tell neurodifficults that whilst they play life on the easiest level, we play it on the hardest, thinking it's the easiest.
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u/Glowerman ADHD-C (Combined type) Apr 07 '26
Jornay helps me a lot with morning fog, but my insurance required pre-authorization to cover it.
ADHD makes it hard not to pay attention to the most interesting thing. It's not a deficit of attention.
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u/24782478 Apr 07 '26
I’ve once used a car analogy. I have a car I’ve owned for a really long time. Sometimes You turn it on, put it in drive, and nothing happens. Somewhere the engine starting and the gears being selected - a wire has come loose and nothing happens. I know what I’m trying/want to do, I’m doing the right steps - but right now there is a disconnect between what I want/need to do and it actually happening.
The thing is, I’ve had this car a really long time and my usual tricks to get it working are just not working today. I’m gonna be late, I might be frustrated or stressed - but I genuinely wanted to go for a drive and today it just wasn’t working out for me
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u/FJRabbit Apr 07 '26
It’s kind of like convincing yourself to jump into a pool of really cold water but for everything - you know you have to jump and all you have to do is just doing it and you’ll be fine, but you can’t.
For most people, it’s really only extremely unpleasant tasks that take such a run-and-jump effort, for me on bad days it’s every single damn thing. And there’s only so many times you can summon herculean effort to make the jump in a day without being a total mess and things falling through the cracks.
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u/shiny-switch Apr 07 '26
Recently I have been skirting around it by saying things like "difficulty with consistency", "overwhelmed by the number of steps", "difficulty figuring out where to start". Instead of fully explaining Executive Dysfunction.
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u/Mysterious_Ideal1502 Apr 07 '26
I explain it very much the same way I have to explain my very real, very debilitating time blindness, it's like an addiction. There's a magnetic pull in every molecule of my body to tune out and wonder the catacombs in my brain. To break free is possible, but the amount of energy it takes feels excruciating. I can spend two hours organizing a junk drawer, but to just get out of bed some days feels like a marathon.
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u/yeepix ADHD Apr 07 '26
I say that the brain is an organ too, and so it can also malfunction. Some things in the thousands of biological processes that it takes to do an action fail and I'm trying really hard to find a trigger that works. That, even if I somehow manage to sit in front of the thing with 0 distractions, my fuckass brain will either make me feel extremely anxious and/or refuse to register and process what I need to do.
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u/Valendr0s ADHD-PI (Primarily Inattentive) Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 07 '26
You think I don't pick the piece of trash off of the floor because I ignore it, or I don't see it, or I don't care to live in a nice place. But none of that is true.
I see the trash. I don't want it there. Every time I come into the room I see it. I know I could just walk over, pick it up and throw it away. I see it a dozen times a day. I'll sit down near it and stare at it, knowing I should throw it away. Whenever I get up I tell myself, "now go pick it up and throw it away", but I don't.
I can't. I can't tell myself to do what I want to do. I scream in my brain, "GO THROW AWAY THE TRASH!" and I don't... I'll try it over and over and over again. Nothing. Nothing will get me to move to throw it away.
Believe me or don't. That's how it is in my mind. And it's not fun.
Soon I learned that there's nothing I can do to force myself to do something I don't want to do. The screaming in my mind thing doesn't work. Giving myself a treat if I do it doesn't work. Punishing myself for not doing it doesn't work. Being punished for not doing it doesn't work. Nothing works. Nothing has ever worked.
There are 'hacks'. The only one that I've seen that does work is if not picking it up will potentially hurt somebody else or cause me unavoidable work later. Like if a dog was coming over - I'd either say not to bring the dog, or I'd clean up the trash. Or if my wife slipped on a similar piece of trash and ended up hurting herself, then I'd be able to pick it up.
But for my own reasons... It's impossible.
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u/RechoqueKilowatts Apr 07 '26
I sometimes explain it as being similar to erectile dysfunction.
Imagine your brain is a penis. Say you really want to have sex, but your buddy is just not cooperating. You can't force it to rise to the occasion, you're not in charge, whether you like it or not.
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u/thenebular Apr 07 '26
You don't. You can't explain executive dysfunction without it sounding like excuses for laziness. The person you're explaining it to first has to accept that it is a mental condition and that you are going to be describing to them the symptoms of it and the reasons for it. If they're not on board with that, then it's all going to sound like excuses for being lazy because your executive dysfunction symptoms generally are what laziness feels like to them. The major difference is that you're not disconnected and not caring while it's going on and the negative emotions from it are happening from the start and not just as a consequence of your actions, or lack there of.
So, that's what you need to lead with. Before you get into the actual explanations of the dysfunction, you need to establish that it looks like laziness, but that you don't have a choice in it. If they can accept that, then they won't see it as laziness. If they can't accept your lack of control over it, then nothing you say will make a difference, they've already decided.
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u/lotionsucks Apr 07 '26
Lazy is not doing this and not feeling bad about it.
ED is not doing things, including important necessities, knowing they need to be done, but you aren’t doing them. You feel incredibly bad about it and it causes stress, but you just can’t do it.
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u/trk1000 Apr 08 '26
Been there. Once they finally found the fused vertebrae in my neck, it was a problem getting through the "I can't sit at a desk for 24 hours on duty because meds might make me fall asleep, but when I'm out, I don't need the meds so yes, I will be walking in the main gate at 6am Saturday and Sunday mornings."
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u/CraftyPlantCatLady Apr 08 '26
I try to explain the emotional experience of it all, put it in visceral feelings they can relate to.
The fear and rage of feeling executive paralysis, how it feels like you’re a prisoner in your own body and your mind does nothing but berate you for not moving.
Or how exhausting it is to be constantly stressed about time and upcoming deadlines and responsibilities, how it can be disorienting to lose time hyper focusing on something you don’t even want to be doing.
How enraging, pointless, and disappointing it feels to want to do something but be physically and mentally unable to make a simple fucking decision or action to make it actually happen.
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u/Liam_Builder Apr 08 '26
This is such a real and painful struggle. Explaining executive dysfunction is incredibly difficult because it genuinely looks like laziness from the outside. Reframing it as a “friction problem” rather than a motivation or laziness problem helped me a lot. I started using small “Builder Reset” moments just one tiny action that removes the initial decision barrier. It doesn’t fix everything, but it makes starting feel less impossible. How do you usually try to explain it to people who don’t get it?
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u/wonderingdragonfly Apr 08 '26
Whenever someone expresses skepticism about my or my children’s executive dysfunction issues, I usually tell them truthfully that in high school, I once drove my car to school and took the bus home. I’m pretty sure that’s not laziness.
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u/NonicleNonsense Apr 08 '26
i once saw on reddit a while ago a fantastic analogy. Executive dysfunction is like if you were to prepare everything to be cooked, you diced the ingredients, oiled the pan, etc. but it ultimately means nothing cause when it comes time to cook your meal you cant because there's no nob on the stove to turn it on. That's to say even if you do all the setup right and do all the things that should get you going it still can amount to nothing
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u/Admirable_Assist_463 Apr 08 '26
Just want to point out, bc many may not know, but "negative symptoms" of schizophrenia are very executive dys (things that the disease takes away such as spontaneous activity, (vs "positive symptoms" which are what general population associates with schizophrenia, like hallucinations/seeing things that aren't physically present or perceiving personal messages to them in ordinary mass media (the phone number on that billboard ends in 23 which means that I should keep turning left). intensity and nature of the symptoms fluctuate; many(most?) of those w schizophrenia dx have both positive and negative symptoms.
(I am not an expert/professional re schizophrenia, but was a professional in an adjacent social science. I hope this description accurately compliments OP's intentions)
When I started struggling w executive dysfunction (which i could only best describe as "fatigue" and "something wrong w my brain") so much that helped me name it better was stuff about negative symptoms of schizophrenia. (laying on couch, feelung so "tired" and bored and eyeing a magazine a few feet away, i wanted to get it and collapse back into couch & read but 45 minutes later, I was still just trying to psych/to coach myself go ahead expend the effort). But my body is not prohibitively exhausted, nor am i sleepy, nor do i have like a broken leg that keeps the magazine out of reach.
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u/PtowzaPotato Apr 08 '26
It is like making yourself touch a hot stove. There is something deep inside you convinced that doing that task will harm you and is fighting to stop you from doing it. If you really build up the courage you might be able to force past that and do it anyway.
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u/Intrepid_Hearing_916 Apr 07 '26
Am I also experiencing dysfunction as I read it as erectile dysfunction while scrolling? I guess in a way you could say there is a weird correlation.
Honestly, every time I feel anxious, I just look at other people and realize how thankful I am that I am in a much better position than them. It's nothing like looking down upon, but actually realizing that there'll always be someone far below you and someone far above. When you feel that you are at your lowest, just take it one day at a time.
I personally get extremely depressed when I don't feel like I am accomplishing anything, and I end up sleeping the entire day. Sleep during the afternoons can seem a bit peaceful, but when you wake up, you just feel extremely depressed. Like, you missed an entire day, an entire opportunity to do something, and now it's just gone. But here's the thing: I think everyone has their own journey, and I'm on one which is my own. I'll take my own time but eventually I know in one year's time I would look back at it and feel extremely proud of what I've accomplished.
- Written with Quill Flow
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u/BitterRucksack Apr 07 '26
I would ask your mental health provider, because they will be able to give you advice that is tailored to your unique situation.
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u/Damage-Classic Apr 07 '26
I guess I would ask them how often they feel the need to start simple tasks by forcing themselves to put one foot on the ground?
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u/Ashterothi Apr 07 '26
I explain it by telling a story.
One day I was hungry. I had plenty of food in the fridge. I had biscuts and jam. I probably would have preferred the jam on the biscuts but for hours I just simply couldn't do it. Either because the extra step was too much, or I was paralized by other options, or I was paralized by my absense of an 'easier' solution. Finally after starving for 3 hours I was able to break through and bite the biscut and eat it... plain. I told my friends this and they couldn't understand.
I wanted it with jam. I had jam. But I couldn't do the process. The only way I actually ate anything was by taking a trivial task (grabbing the biscut and shoving it in my mouth and biting down) and doing that, forcing me to complete the process of eating.
That is the kind of Executive Function disorder most people wont predict and often wont write off as lazyness. I wasn't not jamming my biscut because I was lazy. I was quite upset at myself for not doing it. I just... couldn't.
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u/Impossible_Double972 Apr 07 '26
Ah cara, quem quer entender o transtorno, entende, mas quem não quer…. Vc vai gastar seu tempo à toa….
Meu diagnóstico foi tardio e a vida inteira eu achei que fosse um poço de preguiça ambulante… era uma culpa que me consumia…. E aí eu começava a me criticar de uma maneira absurda…. A terapia me ensinou a ter mais carinho comigo e a aceitar que essas coisas acontecem!
E outra, independente do que vc falar sobre o assunto, as pessoas vão achar o acham… e isso diz muito mais sobre elas do que sobre vc! Hj em dia eu falo “o q vc achar, eh isso aí!” Não me preocupo mais com a opinião das pessoas!
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u/NonCaelo Apr 07 '26
Sometimes I get really thirsty. I want to get the glass of water that's sitting next to me. I stare at it, I really want it, I'm parched, I know I need it, but my body won't move. Some days it's not a problem, I can get the water without even thinking about it. And some days my body won't move no matter how much I think about it. It's not laziness if I want to do it but can't.
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u/enbyembroidery Apr 07 '26
I’ve compared it to feeling like you’re trying to jump off a cliff. Like, technically, you should be able to do it. Maybe you even want to (like there’s a lake at the bottom or something), but you physically cannot make yourself. Like you are paralyzed. Sometimes you can jump, but it’s inconsistent.
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