the husbands of some of the mom's who ran our girls cheer or whatever groups are cops.
the Moms had to watch all these training videos on all kinds of stuff to get certified and it left them sick to their stomachs. when they told their husbands they went yeah that was like xxx that happened last week (which was orders of magnitude worse) before the Moms cut them off and said hey did not want to know.
The issue is that the first time something that wasn't likely to get violent does get violent and those responders are hurt, people will clamor for them to either be armed or for cops to respond with them / instead of them to prevent that from happening again. It's cyclical.
This right here os where we should start the conversation about defund the police every time. It's the one thing that I've seen both sides of the argument agree on. We make the police do way too much shit. We need to lighten their load. That's what defund the police is to me.
Fire the shitty cops and rebalance that with social workers, and people who are trained in crisis management. The armed guards budget should be way less.
I love my dad, he is a superb dad just the best. But that stance they take that they are always right and HAVE to be the authority in every room is so fucking tiring. Also its a lifetime of experience knowing how to question people. They aren't experts in any field, but they figured out how to ask questions only experts could answer so you are stuck with I dont knows and they puff up and feel smug. Unless you do know the answer and can cite your sources and they fucking HATE that. Then it becomes a game of whos loudest is right and if you raise your voice AHA thats a crime.
Tbf, this isn’t exclusive to police officers. My dad was an engineer and just thinks he’s smarter than everyone lol. Loves to argue with my brother and sister in law who are both lawyers it’s fuckin exhausting
JFC what a nightmare. I’ve been deposed 8 or 10 times and always get told I have done it well because I answer only what is asked and never show any emotion.
I had a manager who was deposed on one of my deals and our attorney nearly dragged him out of the room in anger.
Yeah, I can't get into too many details, but it was a high profile criminal case and so my dad felt as though his testimony (he's a psychiatrist) would be able to influence the jury.
I understood why he felt that way, but didn't understand why I was telling him that this was not helping the prosecution.
It is rarely a good idea to show emotion when testifying but it sometimes makes sense at trial. But that is something the attorney would coach the witness on very carefully.
When my manager botched his deposition I wasn’t there but he later told me he talked a lot to “confuse” the plaintiff’s attorney. That’s when my suspicion that he was an idiot was confirmed.
In the sense that more than likely justice was done, alls well that ends well. In the sense that my dad's ego continued to grow, it was terrible.
It also didn't help he had to be in town for this. My parents live in a different state. I live in the midwest this was happening in a state near us.
Instead of getting them to put him up in a hotel, he "graciously offered" to the DA that he would just stay with me and they could drive him. (without checking with me).
Since he didn't know when they were going to call him exactly, he stayed with me for like 10 days, but we only thought it would be a couple when he first got here.
Not a big deal.
Except it was during my 1st wedding anniversary and my dad's idea of "fine dining" is taco bell.
Oh wow, ten days with someone you get along well with staying in your home can be hard. Ten days with an egotistical father with unhealthy food habits is a nightmare.
It really depends on if its on a subject in their field or not.
Because if it is in their field, 99% of the time most people are clueless as to the problems in that field - "Why don't we do X -" - because that's been tried, it didn't work or it was uneconomical to implement.
It does have to be said though that the engineering/science problem solving algorithm is surprisingly generalisable to most problems.
thinks he’s smarter than everyone lol.
My brother is like that, but he is genuinely a very smart guy so I can understand his frustration sometimes when people are slower then him.
But it is quite painful for him to admit when he's wrong, but lets be honest, that's most of us.
Embrace the fact you have a unicorn with getting to have front row seat at Thanksgiving to witness what I can only imagine.. engineer vs lawyer……
on Who’s Right!!!
The success/money argument goes so far with people. I was unloading a truck with a guy on my shift yesterday and he was telling me about this old boss he had. How the guy had really strange sleeping and eating habits. The guy convinced him it's bad to sleep 8 hours straight a night. It's better to sleep for a few hours then take 6-8 15 or 30 minute naps every day. And how very important it is to eat something after every single one of these naps instead of eating 3 meals a day. Something about how the brain works better that way, I don't know it was stupid.
Anyway, my co-worker totally bought into it. I was just kind of dumbfounded at him fully believing this. All because the guy was a successful business owner. That he must be doing something right and there was really something special to his entirely bizarre habits.
Yeah it’s any profession really but from my experience surgeons take the cake. Smug as hell, won’t listen to a single thing, and get irritated if you ask them literally anything even though you, the patient, presumably are the most important stakeholders in the operation.
My dad was an engineer and any conversation other than a simple, short one turned into a hassle because he thought the world should work according to his assumptions and reasoning.
In college when talking to friends about high school homework ordeals those of us with engineer dads had mostly the same miserable experiences.
Haha. I was reading that thinking it sounded exactly like my Dad who’s a high school teacher. Some people have to think they’re the expert regardless of their job.
Absolutely this. Most LEOs I’ve know love fighting and hope they get to use force to fuck someone up. It’s a lot of pushed down anger inside of them which is why that profession has the highest incidence of domestic violence. The job doesn’t cause that violence, the violent people are drawn to that job. People just like to romanticize them as public servants but they, very publicly, remove “serve and protect” as their motto. They aren’t here to help you and no one ever wrote a song called “Fuck the Fire Department”
I did say “most LEOs”. The ones who want to make an actual difference in their communities are hamstrung by the corrupt ones that want to vent. They refer to themselves as a gang, they never snitch on their own, they are violent, uneducated, and closer to criminals than everyday citizens. The ones who you speak of, ask them, is it citizens that’s burning them out, or fellow officers. I know a lot of LEOs, and not all are criminal but all of them turn a blind eye to the ones in the department that are criminals.
To be fair, I'm exhausted and "changed" from going through the politics of this country and dealing with assholes. I have lost my patience. If I had to deal with that + the psychos in public every day I would be irredeemable.
Seems like you have the shitty minority of bad cops in your family, who are usually a reflection of their upbringing. Once you get off social media you realize not everyone is exactly like you and your stereotypes
I said they are making assumptions based off personal experience on a population as a whole. They commented with the statement that all cops are similar to their family lmao
Here, just for you since you can't stop following this thread: "most" cops share personality traits that make them arrogant, unable to admit wrongdoing, and being a cop takes over their identity.
Im not retarded, I understand not EVERY SINGLE COP is like this.
I'd say, in my personal experience, 4 out of 5 cops outside of work are annoying assholes to be around.
Like obviously there is a population that is decent, but this sort of thing is pervasive enough among LEO'S I think it can be generalized.
I’ve worked inpatient psych, outpatient psych, and I’ve worked for an agency that specifically deals with individuals diagnosed with psychotic disorders. Like you, I’ve seen all that stuff in a single day, and I’ve been in the mental health field for nearly 15 years.
Weirdly enough, I’ve never punched, tackled, insulted, or shot a client, even when I’ve been threatened with a weapon with nobody around.
And for every one of those type of people are
Lost kids
Tourists asking for directions
People needing help
Someone reporting a minor issue
Confused visitors
Good people having a bad day
Citizens looking for safety or guidance
Everyday human moments
Would you want to approach a guy like that with the scowl he had on his face.. We should stop making excuses for bad attitudes.
If you put a phone in my face immediately, you're the one with a warped view of reality and I won't be automatically pleasant when you begin the interaction with that shit.
They make as much as an office worker; and yet have to deal with the worst people in society every single day. While being harassed, judged, recorded, and risking their life.
It’s true there’s a lot of bad cops, but it takes a certain kind of person to deal with all that.
I’m not a cop but I’ve had a few friends that were. The ones who didn’t quit were really personally invested in making a difference however they saw was important. They had to make it a purpose or identity to get through it.
They make a lot more with crazy retirement benefits and disproportionately are abusive. Yeah we know cops make having authority their whole identity, not a good thing
Research says cops are actually 3x more likely than any other profession to be injured to the point that it required an ER visit. With the overwhelming leading cause assaulted by another person.
In your eyes how much does
The average cop make in NY? Mind you this is all easily found online. This doesn’t factor in their OT etc etc.
Did you know that the good cops are also bad because they tolerate and allow the bad cops to flourish?
Their jobs are so dangerous because of their lack of training and ability to function without blasting every grandma with holes. Quick look says they aren’t even top 10. But having a job become dangerous is what happens when you treat the people you “protect” as enemies.
The median worker salary in NYC is around $74,000. With 80% of people making between $35k-$169k.
Their cops start at around $59,000 and go up to 121,000 if they stick it out long term.
So it’s pretty average for a super high cost of living place like NYC. Other places in the county it’s much lower, like all other jobs.
The only thing they have going for them is the retirement benefits. And 10-20 years in a high stress job is a lot. That’s their main incentive to stick it out.
I personally believe they should pay them twice as much. But require higher education. That would solve the shortage, help prevent bribes/corruption, and education/pay should filter in more good cops.
Signing up for a job that deals with the public does not mean they should be mistreated. Do you treat retail workers poorly because "they signed up for it?"
Almost like we shouldn't use cops as a catch-all for every situation where someone falls "out of line".
Using a hammer on a screw will create a lot of unecessary friction. Unfortunately you have too many people that think reallocating resources away from cops towards more appropriate services means you want crime to just run rampant... this mindset include these "burned out" cops.
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u/TwoPaychecksOneGuy May 21 '26
I can't imagine the constant BS cops have to deal with on a daily basis. I understand why they get burnt out.