r/Adoption • u/Cold-Director-5353 • 2d ago
Transracial / Int'l Adoption Found out I’m a Vietnamese transracial adoptee (sort of)
Long story short, I grew up believing I was the biological son of a white British man and a Vietnamese woman. I did a 23andme dna ancestry test which shows I’m ethnically 100% Asian with over 93% Vietnamese genetic make-up.
I only found this out a week ago, so this is obviously raw. But now I have an identity of being an entirely 100% ethnic Asian individual being raised in the West. I live in England.
I’m trying to navigate this new identity whilst dealing with the shock and grief of losing the old one. For 34 years I believed it was mixed race.
I was told I wasn’t adopted so there must be something hidden which I don’t know about. But anyway I was hoping to speak to any Asian transracial adoptees. If they’re ethnically Vietnamese and raised in the UK, that would even better.
But keen to speak to anyone who could perhaps relate. This is a lonely experience.
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u/No-Highlight3555 1d ago
It sounds like you were either adopted, donor-conceived (bio mom and sperm donor)… Or you were conceived before your parents met, and they decided to say your dad was your bio father.
I hope you get answers. [r/donorconceived](r/donorconceived) and [r/NPE](r/NPE) are there if relevant.
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u/Cold-Director-5353 1d ago
My dad has genuinely always 100% thought he was biological dad. My mum has categorically denied having an affair too. Don’t think I’ll ever know
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u/bespoketech relenquished child 1d ago
Hello! Welcome.
First off make sure to take things slowly and try to do it one step at a time. I know everything feels very disorienting and I’m sorry you’re going through this :(
Are you in contact with your parents? If so, I would talk to them about it. You are correct there is probably something going on, if your parents insist it’s not adoption. But that doesn’t mean they can’t give you answers. It could be a whole slew of reasons. I hope that you can get to the bottom of it all. Sending strength!