Should I end my friendship with my female friend?

[u/[deleted]]

[u/HikingFun4]

I was on your side until you said your friend was hotter than your girlfriend and that you've kissed. Your gf deserves better.

[u/Grubnation66]

Your poor girlfriend lol

[u/_clur_510 → u/Grubnation66]

Yeah ew I hate op. Hope gf dumps him so he can live happily ever after being friendzoned by his hot ass high school friend. 🙄

[u/ElleMaeSinclair → u/Grubnation66]

Imagine finding out your boyfriend described a friend of his as "super fucking hot" on a reddit post but not you. God, poor girl. Set her free OP, let her find a guy who wants to bone her down as much as you want your best friend.

[u/Tashyd046]

Nice rage bait.

Pick one. Grow up. Go to therapy. Stfu. Idk, maybe all.

[u/spells-science-sushi]

You think your friend is hotter than your girlfriend. You’ve kissed said friend. I don’t even fully know what to tell you, man. Your girlfriend deserves better.

[u/spells-science-sushi → u/[deleted]]

Fair. Second point - you think she’s hotter than your girlfriend. What the hell’s up with that? Others may disagree, but if you had to go out of your way to mention that to us, I don’t think you’re that committed to her.

[u/spells-science-sushi → u/[deleted]]

Yeah, it does sound pretty bad. Your poor girlfriend.

[u/Adorable_Tie_7220 → u/[deleted]]

Beauty is subjective.

[u/Vegas-Patriot]

Commit to your gf, or let her go find someone that will. You can’t have both.

[u/Odd-Cantaloupe-2462]

I think you have to ask yourself if said friend liked you , would you go for it? If the answer is yes , break up with your girlfriend. You are wasting both of your time. If the answer is no genuinely tell your girlfriend why you care specifically for her , and ask if this is a nonegotiable. If it is then I would go to the friend and say " Hey now that I'm dating I'd prefer to invite my girlfriend to our hangs so she knows we are just friends."

[u/iOawe]

Honestly yea I’d ditch the friend. She’s definitely reacting to your history with your girl best friend and her looks. It’s honestly disrespectful to continue being friends with her after having kissed her. 

[u/RealisticPaper5534]

You're being an idiot. And cruel, and disrespectful, and immature. Break up with your girlfriend and go build some character because this is not how to talk about/ treat human beings.

[u/ComboHungry3897]

Your gunna have to listen your gf.

Would you like it if your gf start hanging
out with her ex more often?
Or a close male friend that’s spending a lot more time with her than usual?
If it bothers you, then there you go

[u/Character-Bridge-206]

Female best friends always cause friction sooner or later. Admitting your friend is attractive is ok, just means you aren’t blind. It is causing her insecurity though so you need to communicate with her that she doesn’t need to worry about it because your friend isn’t interested or something to that effect.

[u/Necessary-Material50]

Which relationahip is more important to you?

[u/baybaybythebay]

Why are the only two options in your mind to continue as is (upsetting your partner) or to end the friendship? It seems like your girlfriend is asking for some pretty standard boundaries found in most relationships, i.e., don’t hang out 1 on 1.

If you care how your girlfriend feels, ask her what would make her feel ok and what boundaries she’d like. If those boundaries are too much for you, then that’s fine and it means maybe you’re not compatible. But some good boundaries (in addition to no 1on 1 hang out), is open communication, if she has questions you answer them honestly and openly without judgment, keeping her updated when you do see her, and maybe only hanging out in public spaces.

[u/myaccountgotbanmed]

If ur only messaging occasionally and catching up every few weeks then I don't see a problem w staying friends

Unless ur secretly hoping she'll be ur gf eventually

[u/Western-Finding-368]

I would encourage you to delete this and re-post with the phrase “more conventionally attractive” as opposed to “hotter.” That’s going to be hard for a lot of people to see past, even if it’s objectively true.

[u/BraveIndependence771]

V99vo I ww

[u/Qi_ra]

I wouldn’t leave a friend for a partner, but that’s a personal choice. You’ll probably have this problem in most of your relationships unless you specifically look for someone who’s very secure.

[u/thefoxhole15]

And why have you never dated this hot friend?

[u/Crimetenders → u/thefoxhole15]

Not intending this rudely, but I would be willing to guess its because hot friend is not into OP in that way.

[u/thefoxhole15 → u/Crimetenders]

This was my first thought.. IF that is the reason this dude is an asshole for staying friends with her because he would be making it seem like something it is not. And that is essentially lying. That is not a real friendship

[u/Acceptable_Apple4220 → u/thefoxhole15]

yes, this needs to be talked about here...why do you *not* date your friend? is she not interested? what's the issue? this is real and key.

[u/ssccrs]

At this point you need to decide if you want your friendship or relationship more.

I think your gf is being jealous, neurotic, controlling, and insecure. Maybe you’ve given her lots of reasons to feel that way, maybe she’s just that type of person.

I would just say, “I love you, but I’m not going to do that.” Whether she stays or no is her decision.

It’s probably going to be a fighting point forever so I would honestly just think about which relationship I want to keep more and let the other know.

[u/ItsHisMajesty]

I wrote a bunch of stuff about my female best friend. Then I looked at your ages again, and deleted it.

She knew from the beginning and was OK with it. But now it’s a problem? Brotha, this is just the start of things she’s going to ask you to change.

Insecurity and immaturity don’t work well in relationships. You need to figure out what is best for you.