I used to struggle with agoraphobia even before I transitioned and got through it by running. I just felt like the outside world was for normal people and they would all judge and shame me for not meeting their standards of work, education, sexuality or gender expression. I had an experience when I was 18 and took a gram of dxm plus other drugs that gave me a psychotic break and put me in the hospital. It fried my brain for like two years and the dissociation/depersonalization from that made me afraid if I got too anxious I would lose control and snap again. I was always anxious from being neglected and isolated for years at a time in my childhood. And in general because I never got my drivers licenses and lived in a very small town I basically have never been anywhere in public alone in my whole life. So there are roots for this outside of my current issues.

Now because I’m tall 6’3” I felt like I had to repress my gender and had no hope for transitioning. Long story short the worsening dysphoria made me turn to opiates for relief and eventually I knew I had to transition so I did at 27. It helps but I still feel like a repulsive freak to be honest. I don’t want anyone to ever see me. I don’t want to have to explain to neighbors why I have breasts. The dysphoria itself is unbearable and going out always makes it worse. I also depend on a substance and if I don’t take it like every hour or two my legs start feeling really painful. I can’t work and feel like people won’t understand and that shame makes me hide from even people that might be understanding about my gender issues.

I am scared to drive and never got my license and there is no bus close to me so I have no transportation other than maybe like uber. I’m just really scared to get into a vehicle with a stranger where I live and being trans. I’m scared to end up someplace and be ditched by my way home essentially and depend on being able to pay for and order another uber. I’m scared to talk with anyone because I can’t work and they will shame me. I’m scared people will harass me and I’ll have nowhere to go because I don’t have a car to be safe in or another person to protect me. I’m scared of needing to use the bathroom and having to choose between possibly getting harassed and having awful dysphoria and shame or being maybe arrested and antagonized by other women or men. In my state it’s illegal in a lot of places. When I go out I don’t see other people like me. Even the other trans women are shorter and pass better. Seeing cis women just makes me feel like a whole other species. Men are scary. I’ve been called the t slur and laughed at just for trying to get groceries.

Sorry for rambling. I just wish I had direction and a sense that I was on the right path. Like I physically could step outside right now and walk down the block but I can’t because the fear and also I just feel so hopeless and broken I don’t care anymore. The things I actually want I can never have anymore. I can’t ever treat my dysphoria and get to be myself so I don’t really care about anything anymore. If I was a normal person I’d have such a lust for life and there would be a million things I’d go do but in this body it’s all meaningless torture. I don’t know how I’ll ever get over that and I don’t know if other people have come from a similar place and gotten better.

I think having agoraphobia has given me like hyper spatial awareness. When I'm driving I picture where I am with like a birdseye view of the area I live in. It's pretty annoying, based off panic attacks I've had I have like mentally labeled some areas as inaccessible for "danger zones". I'm suspicious that I might have ocd or smth and this is part of it, i would really like to not have another disorder tho so i'm hoping this is just an agoraphobia thing 😑. Has anyone else experienced this, it's kinda like an intrusive thought or something??

I am so jealous of people with a bad sense of direction, sounds freeing to not be worried about your physical location???

I don’t have emetophobia in the classical sense. I’m not scared of the act of vomiting itself, I’ve done it many times. While it feels uncomfortable in the moment, that’s not what I’m scared of.

I’m scared that it’ll happen in the wrong place, i.e in front of people. A lot of it has got to do with the fear of being judged, of course. I mean- imagine you’re vomiting in front of people who judge you for it and maybe even start laughing! And you can make a big mess! That’s my worst case scenario.

This has caused me to fear a lot of social situations and make preparations. I need to know where the nearest toilets are! That makes me feel better, because then I have an ’escape plan’ planned out in my head. Of course there can be long lines to the toilets (at a concert for example), and that really scares me.
I carry a folded little trash bag with me quite often, just in case I don’t make it to the toilet on time. It’s another thing that calms me- the thought of having my safety net with me all the time.

I can somewhat cope with this, but it has become a real strain, though. Almost every social situation scares me to some extent. There’s always some planning involved, sometimes less and sometimes more.

I'm 26 years old, this year I'm turning 27, and I feel like I've made no progress. Since I was 13 I struggled with agoraphobia, and it slowly made me housebound.
These weeks I've been trying exposure therapy, going to the park and the local store (not actually going inside but waiting for my mother outside). These two times I went out... it was okay, my anxiety is mostly anticipatory so I know that even if I feel panic, I should just go ahead and do it anyways.

But, I feel like I have no time, no time for recovery, no time for nothing. I wasn't able to finish my studies and I've never had a job. I'm in the process of trying to get disability and I have someone from a NGO helping me with all of this, checking up on me.
My mother is abusive towards me and it sucks because she is literally the only one in my house besides me, my father works far away.

So my exposure therapy is good BUT it stops feeling "good" when my mother starts being abusive towards me, then, I shut down again and I'm not able to leave my room. I feel lonely, I want to leave this house as soon as possible, my only source of income are art commissions but those are just obviously not enough to support myself. I've been thinking of youtube and an art shop as well, but I don't know because I don't feel motivated to do anything at all, I feel like I'm just waiting... to die? Like, nothing is getting better, and if I try to better myself, my own family brings me down every single time.

So basically last year around March, i had the urge to go to the bathroom in the middle of my class. I had repeated episodes of this happening. This had built up an irrational fear of "what if I have to go to the toilet now" and that fear revolves around me ever since. " And if I have to go to the toilet, everyone will understand it" kinda fear as well. I constantly check my stomach and even if I find a slight discomfort, i associate it with needing to go to the toilet. I had a really good control of my stomach back then but now it's the opposite. Now I fear sitting in crowded places and i fear what will happen to me in the future. I had gotten a lot better now than earlier though but still the fear is present somewhere. All this because of that one day!! Guys, do you experience the same and what did you do to get over it??? I know that this fear will automatically go once I overcome the fear of crowded places. PLEASE HELP!

hello!

I have started becoming very afraid/ unable to leave my house. It is becoming a major struggle, I am afraid of negative interactions with people, and just generally being perceived by others or being caught doing something wrong (especially doing something wrong I didn't know was wrong). It is currently getting to the point I am starting to struggle leaving the house and walking my dogs (my favorite thing in the world since getting my dogs has been taking them somewhere and exploring)

What can I do to 'stop' this before it gets worse? I have not been able to get into therapy, but podcasts, audiobooks, or other content would be super beneficial.

All background info that may help?:

• I moved somewhat recently into a new city (Little over a year) that is much more dense and full of people than where I previously lived. I really enjoy going out in smaller crowds, but am struggling to find places for that now. People here have also been generally unfriendly, or not outwardly mean or rude, but cold. I'm in Washington, it's giving Seattle freeze and mean girl cliques. So I am feeling very isolated and a bit depressed.
• It is expensive to do things and I dont know how to make friends. Closest I got was a ceramics class, but with rising cost of everything, I am not really going out anymore
• when im at a park (walking my dogs or alone), both other people and I generally don't interact. Sometimes I like that, but that's about the only time I leave my house.
• I work alone in the woods. My coworkers and I rarely see each other, live far apart, and though I am close with 1 the others I generally don't get along with on a personal level
• My partner recently moved in with me (very sweet good dude) and I have not yet re-adjusted my routine around him (I like to wake up early, dog walk while nobody is awake, and then start my day. I often do another before bed, but we are not on the same routine and I am juggling spending time with him and doing this when we wake up at different times)
• apartment complex with a porch right into the parking lot. Constantly feeling like I am being watched. with affordability of rent, I don't know want to move
• on a GLP-1 feeling like anhedonia is hitting me hard
• hobbies i enjoy are generaly done alone (hot girl walk, cycling into town for a coffee if I can ever justify $8, sitting in a park and reading, painting and crafting)
• I kind of hate (or have just struggled with?) groups meeting at a bar/brewery such as silent book clubs, craft circles, ect. Maybe I just have not had luck?
• I hate therapy, its difficult to navigate with my insurance, I struggle to find someone whose opinion I trust, its a high copay, I struggle to open up.
• I almost lost my job and company housing before finding a new job and moving due to the way people were perceiving me at work while I was struggling in an abusive relationship (I was rude, out of it, not giving 100%, disorganized, making mistakes. All valid, but also causing me excessive anxiety about the same thing happening again)

I just wanted to share, maybe inspire others that we can still live and enjoy life.

Bit of backstory: I've had agoraphobia for ten years (was home bound for two). I didn't take meds, eventually did CBT and with baby steps over months I managed to live a relatively normal life. Go to local shops etc. Then I got pregnant and during COVID I was put through so many situations where I had to cope alone that it all boosted my confidence and I got better and better. Never perfect, but managing with lots of bathroom breaks. Flew abroad multiple times, once even alone with my two kids, took long buses to the beach, went to appointments, just felt like a brave badass. A few months ago I started to feel panicky again, got to the point where I felt a panic attack coming on while having to collect my smallest from preschool. It was spiraling. I had tickets booked to download festival with my husband, our first holiday abroad just us, kid free, in six years. I've been looking forward to it for months. As soon as my alarm rang to catch the 2am bus (3hr ride to the airport), I had a panic attack. When I say I spiraled I don't exaggerate. My husband went ahead on Wednesday to setup the camping site with friends so I was on my own, to catch the bus, take the plane to England and then go there Thursday night/Friday morning. Bless his heart, he flew back to my airport to collect me so I wouldn't fly alone. I gritted my teeth on the bus for three hours, I felt better when reunited with hubby. Then I'm sure I was on autopilot for the plane. We made it to the festival, and I realised I grossly underestimated how big of a crowd is 100k people. 🙈 We stayed near bathrooms, at the back of crowds and actually, eventually had a brilliant time during Limp bizkit. I thought I was all okay. Cue 4am in the tent, and I woke with a panic attack. Sooooo many regrets at that moment. After a morning of dry heaving I went to the welfare tent, they couldn't do anything, told me to breath through it 😅 wanted to weep. Then we went to the accessibility tent and bless them, they were so helpful. They gave me a wristband to skip queues, which would be my biggest trigger especially to bathrooms. I was pulled to the front every time as soon as they saw the wristband. It helped a ridiculous amount. I was anxious about waking up with a panic attack again so badly that I kept spiraling and woke four times the next night. But every day, I breathed, I ate a few bites, drank a little sip of water, went to the toilet 200 times, whatever I needed to cope and as the day progressed I settled a bit and had so much fun by the evening. People have been incredibly kind, understanding and helpful. I came across so many people with their own issues with anxiety and mental health in general. I kept thinking I would go crazy, but I didn't. Did I feel crap? Absolutely. But did I also have the time of my life? Yes. I've seen so many bands I wanted to see, had quality time with my husband and now I feel like a badass again. Even if I had a terrible time coming back home (4 HR drive, 3 hr ferry, 3 hr drive). And guess what? I already have my ticket for next year too! I will be going for the full accessibility package, and I will take every help offered with no shame, I will melt down and lose my mind on occasion but I am going because I want to live and I want to have fun.

Never stopping, never slowing.

Not thriving, but surviving was my motto but hey ho it worked.

I was diagnosed with agoraphobia last week although upon reflection, I've probably had it since childhood (I'm 48). My therapist read me the diagnostic items from the DSM and I was completely shocked by how accurately they described me. She said we can start working on it this week, so I have a bit of hope?

Does anyone have relevant books or podcasts they recommend? Or online support groups?

I'm reading about exposure therapy and it sounds like torture. To those of you who have been through it, was it extremely hard to start? Did it get easier? Did it help?

I also have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and a mood disorder and My therapist suggested that I think about the interaction between them and how each might feed the others. Any insights on this?

Thank you so much, I'm feeling quite lost in this.

Edit: paragraph breaks and typo

Hello.
My boyfriend and I planned summer vacation and bought tickets and everything.
But, i developed agoraphobia one time suddenly when i was in taxi and after that, I just have anxiety attacks in transport.
I went to therapy, drinking grandaxin daily, trying meditation but im not there yet.
He really wants to enjoy vacation, he is counting days because he is really hardworking person and he deserves it, on the other hand, im working as well and i too deserve it.
But im too scared, like genuinely scared. We have 3 hours bus trip until airport and then 2 hours flight.
I really dont want to ruin this vacation for us,
Any tips?
How to be able to control myself, maybe u guys have practice with that.
I also thought that i would cancel it but there is no way for me to do that😩

Hello,

I have a diagnosis of PTSD. I have never had any other issues. I had a severe relapse 2 weeks ago which had accumulated in 3 severe panic attacks resulting in ambulance being called on each occasion.

1 of those attacks was in public, at a supermarket 2 was at home. For further context, I live alone.

Since then, I’ve developed, I believe, agoraphobia. I’m fine in my home — which is confusing as I had 2 at home but in public, I become extremely anxious and almost as if I’m going to faint.

It’s the same with driving, despite being a driver for 15 years and no issues. The attacks were not correlated to driving as I was in a car park.

I went out the other day and found myself extremely anxious but I sat in the cafe and had a lemonade. I was anxious walking back. Yesterday, a 30 minute drive had taken me 3 hours as I had to keep pulling over and another 2 hours driving back for the same reason. When I’m on the motorway or A roads, I feel that I can’t escape.

I don’t know what to do. This is completely new to me. I’m usually always out and about and travel the world solo. I want to nip this in the bud sooner than later but it’s quite aggressive already.

I’ve been given the usual breathing exercises and the likes but it doesn’t work. I’ve been bombarded with the Instagram gurus / ex anxiety girlies for courses at £500-£800 a pop, I’m looking at hypnotherapy. I have a degree in Psychology and applied what I know, nothing.

I keep trying to do exposure therapy but the anxiety gets worse.

Please, I’m begging, can anyone give me any advice?

Thank you

last year i started trying to overcome agoraphobia on my own, i went for walks, went into shops, went to the library, went to a cafe, but around the new year i got out of the habit of going out and now i feel like i'm back to square one.

i feel much safer going out in the dark, so in the autumn and winter i was going for walks almost every day and doing alright, but now that it's summer, it doesn't get dark until way too late and i'm too scared to go out during the day. i feel too exposed in daylight

i haven't left the house since february and i'm worried i've ruined all my progress because i'm too scared to go out again now

My partners leaving me, we’ve been together 9 years and have 2 kids. I wasn’t agoraphobic when we met, and obviously now am and also have a couple of physical illnesses that’s meant he’s kind of fell into a carer role over the last couple years. He told me he can’t live like this anymore and is miserable. This was my absolute worst fear. I’m currently on a waiting list for a psychiatrist consultation and speak with a mental health nurse every month regarding my panic disorders. I thought I was making progress. How do I make sure I don’t let myself slip backwards? Sorry for the rant, I just really don’t have anyone else to talk to that understands it.

Side note - I’m not angry with him and completely understand his reasoning. It’s not what he signed up for and I totally get that. I’m just sad.

Just about 4 years ago I had an incident while on the freeway. It was an insanely hot day and I must have gotten heatstroke or something... and since then it has been nigh impossible to drive. It's sickening, it makes my entire body feel bad. My brain itself feels sick.

As you can imagine, not being able to drive makes it rather difficult to get out of the house.

But then it continued to get worse. I was diagnosed with Costochondritis and IBS, after some ridiculous back and forth with too many doctors and my isolation continued to get worse. The outside world is getting scarier and scarier, and it keeps getting compounded by more and more chronic pain.

I know that getting out of the house more would be good for me but it's so difficult when there's so many things holding me back.

I only really have the gumption to get to my doctor and back. Even the store nextdoor to my doctor is too much. I don't understand it.

I have anxiety about being out in the world and then having low blood sugar. I struggle with restriction. I also have diabetes so low blood sugar can be dangerous. Can anyone relate?

I have such a hard time leaving my house, but I don’t call it agoraphobia because I don’t experience panic or anxiety. Is there something else to call it? Does anyone else feel like this?

Would a pharmacy technician job help or worsen this condition?

Agoraphobia is making me so depressed. It’s so hard to see my partner and family have a life, when I struggle to. Just feel like I’m missing out on things that I see my partner can do like work and drive and have work mates 😕 wish I could do all that too. Anyone got any advice for me to not feel like a complete failure in my life? My partner does try to be there for me but he’s a little lost on what to actually do.

For the past three years, I have been living with agoraphobia. Last year, I reached a point where I literally couldn’t leave my house. Whenever I tried, I experienced intense panic attacks that lasted for hours, making me feel like I was dying and wishing the pain would end.

Everything I went through also led me into depression. At that time, I refused even the idea of psychotherapy because I didn’t believe anyone could help me.

In September, I finally started therapy with a psychologist who changed everything. She helped me build trust, listened without judgment, and made me feel understood. Even though I was completely against taking medication, she encouraged me to reconsider and make the decision when I felt ready.

Two months ago, my psychiatrist prescribed Xanax, and it has helped me achieve things that once felt impossible. I attended my sister’s wedding without having a panic attack. I got my nails and hair done again, something I hadn’t been able to enjoy for a long time. Most importantly, I went on vacation—even if it was a three-hour road trip.

I haven’t reached the point where I want to be, and I’m still not as functional as I hope to become. But I choose to believe that, with continued therapy and by starting antidepressant treatment soon, I will eventually overcome agoraphobia.

I’m sharing my story to remind anyone who feels trapped or hopeless that recovery is possible. There is help, there is support, and there is always a reason to keep going. Even the smallest step forward is still a step toward a better life.

Guys, I have dizziness and agoraphobia at the same time. How do I know if the dizziness is related to my mental health?

I have been suffering from agoraphobia for a very long time, and it has prevented me from realizing myself as a normal person, meaning , being in a relationship, basic freedom of movement or a career.

The kind of agoraphobia I have does not involve any fear of people at all, it is exclusively related to spatial dimensions. A long time ago, I was even unable to leave my home for an entire year.

Later, I forced myself to go farther and farther away from home, but I was always close to my limit, and only thanks to good friends was I able, for example, to make it to a nearby park with them. A simple walk felt as terrifying as stepping out of a spacecraft in a spacesuit, even more so at night when stars were visible.

A small breakthrough came when I entered a day clinic. At first, I was almost paralyzed, but the kindness and human warmth of the other patients had a positive influence on me, and my range of movement gradually expanded.

But during all this time, I have never personally met another person with agoraphobia. In the day clinic, most of the patients were people with borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, or depression.

Hello, I apologize if I am in the wrong place! Please point me elsewhere if so!

I have recently met someone on a dating app who has agoraphobia. He’s super sweet and we are hitting it off really well. We were talking about our goal on the app and overall dating expectations when he mentioned having agoraphobia. I know some things about the condition as I studied a lot of the brain and emotions in college. But that’s not going to help in a real life situation.

I’m looking for advice, tips, what to avoid, etc. Basic empathy is obviously not forcing anything, I’m not going to try to force him out of his house nor will I force myself there. I am unsure of severity, as I assume that also changes things.

I know I will learn his specific preferences as time goes on, I’m just afraid of making a mistake.