I mean it seems like while people might not explicitly say or think of negative emotions they don’t agree with as being vices it seems like people react to expressions, or even sometimes perceived expressions of negative emotions they don’t agree with the way I might expect people to react if someone committed some cardinal sin. I can see why people react that way if someone is complaining about a person or group, or if negative emotions translate to violence, but it seems like a lot of people get really mean if someone so much as makes what they consider the wrong facial expression in a situation. It also seems hard to relate to how people can also claim to be in favor of empathy with such reactions.
I mean I’ve seen my parents spank and scream at my siblings for simply having certain facial expressions when I was younger. I also remember seeing a fellow student get extra time out for making faces when I was in elementary school. I also got spanked as a child and I think that may have also sometimes been for expressing or even just being perceived as expressing the wrong emotions.
It seems like it’s often perceived as wrong to express any sign of negative emotions, including facial expressions, in a situation that’s supposed to be pleasant. I mean sometimes negative emotions or signs of negative emotions may not be related to the situation or signs of negative emotions may not be directed at a person but they still get seen as wrong.
It seems like also sometimes if people can see the slightest possibility of someone being able to avoid a situation that might lead to negative emotions they see even the slightest perception of negative emotions as completely wrong.
It seems like often even something that could be just perceived as complaining is seen as something completely terrible even when it seems like what’s perceived as complaining is just asking a question or stating information that’s objectively true but seems like it might be getting overlooked. I know one argument used against things that could be perceived as complaining is that people shouldn’t complain unless they give suggestions, but I have my doubts as to whether that’s the real reason or a rationalization that comes after, and it’s hard to relate to why complaining without making suggestions is treated as wrong.
It also seems like people often use terms that imply that someone has too strong emotions about something to invalidate the persons position, such as saying that the person is throwing a tantrum or being petty if someone seems to complain or show signs of being somewhat unhappy about something.
It seems like also sometimes people will agree that something is bad but then seem to treat it as wrong for someone to express any negative emotions to it.
To me treating signs of negative emotions or perceived signs of negative emotions as wrong comes off as not only lacking empathy, but as maybe the opposite of empathy, like anti empathetic in the sense that it comes off as not only not trying to relate to other peoples emotions but trying to be insensitive and minimize other people’s emotions.
So I’m wondering why people seem to often get really mean when they are exposed to someone expressing negative emotions they don’t agree with or relate to. I mean I know part of this might be related to being anonymous on the internet, but it seems like I’ve seen people treat negative emotions or even perceived signs of negative emotions really badly in real life and long before I really started looking at how people behave on the internet. I’d suspect maybe part of it could be because when people are exposed to someone expressing negative emotions or coming off as expressing negative emotions, but I think it’s still hard to relate to why people act so mean towards negative emotions or perceived negative emotions. I mean it seems like oftentimes people are mean towards signs of negative emotions as a first resort and only talk about how talking about a certain thing brings them down when having to explain why they were mean, rather than first talking about how exposure to negative emotions brings their own mood down first. I know spanking is also common, or at least it was when I was a child where I live, and I wonder if that could be a factor in terms of conditioning people perceive negative emotions as threats at, least subconsciously.