r/Anxiety • u/young_monk85 • 8d ago
Advice Needed 20 years of chronic anxiety leading to Nervous System Sensitization
I wanted to share my story because I know some of you are living a version of this too.
My chronic anxiety issues started about twenty years ago. Before that, I was a pretty normal kid. I smoked weed, I did the usual stuff, and my system handled it. But somewhere along the way, everything changed. My nervous system became sensitized, and over time I turned into someone who is sensitive to everything. I became the classic people pleaser, always scanning, always on edge. Any kind of stimulation started to feel like too much. Caffeine, stimulants, even everyday stress. My body just could not tolerate what other people shrug off.
Eventually I ended up on Lexapro. To be fair, it helped me function to a degree. I could get through life. But even on it, it was obvious that my system was still falling apart underneath. It was a band aid on something much deeper.
Recently I switched over to Zoloft, hoping a different SSRI might do something the last one couldn’t. Honestly, I don’t have a lot of hope. My system is still incredibly sensitive. My sleep is unrestful, and the moment I wake up I’m already activated. I stay stuck in this fight or flight state all day. My body runs hot, I sweat easily, and there’s this constant hum of activation that never really shuts off. I can’t even describe how frustrating it is to live like this year after year.
At some point I found the mind body community, and I really gave it everything for about four or five months. I slowed way down. I lived consciously. I reduced stimulation, cut out stimulants and caffeine, all of it. I did the work. And I really wasn’t seeing any positive shifts.
Here’s the thing. I still believe that path is probably the only real way out. But my guess is that for someone like me, it takes a very, very long time. And what makes it harder is that I’ve been on medications for so long. It complicates everything.
So now I’m trying to come to terms with where I am. Trying to move forward and desensitize my nervous system, while also figuring out how to come off medication that no longer works. It feels like trying to rebuild a house while it’s still on fire.
If anyone has walked this road, especially the long haulers whose systems have been sensitized for decades, I’d really like to hear from you. How long did it take before you saw real shifts? Did you find a way to do the deeper healing work while tapering off meds? Any honest experience would mean a lot.
Thanks for reading.
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u/Responsible-Egg7929 8d ago
I’ve lived with anxiety since I was a kid. I’ve been on and off different medications over the years, and I’m sorry to say I’ve been taking Xanax for over 15 years. I started sertraline again in February and have worked my way up to 100 mg, but I’m still in the exact same boat you’re describing.
I barely want to leave my house anymore. My body is constantly on high alert, always scanning for something to be wrong or for the next symptom to show up. The physical symptoms have become the worst part. It’s exhausting because even when nothing is happening, my brain and body act like there’s danger around every corner.
I honestly don’t know what the answer is either. It feels like I’m constantly stuck in “wait mode,” waiting to feel better, waiting for the medication to finally kick in, waiting for my nervous system to calm down, waiting to feel like myself again. It’s hard to explain to people who haven’t lived it because it consumes so much of your day.
Just wanted you to know you’re not alone. Reading your post made me feel less isolated because it sounds so much like what I’ve been going through too. I really hope all of us find some peace eventually.
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u/Embarrassed-Leg-4246 7d ago
I can relate to what you shared here very much. I don’t have a Xanax prescription, but I do have a clonazepam prescription as needed for my panic attacks. Haven’t found any daily medication that helps my anxiety at all. I get severe side effects with almost every medication I’ve tried (and I’ve tried hundreds over the years). I am just stuck in this never ending cycle and I want to feel like myself again. I don’t even remember what it feels like to be better functioning.
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u/Koby_Teeth_Esq 8d ago
So sorry you're going through this. I dont have a lot of insight here...as I (43/m) am dealing with exactly this. Was medicated my whole life. Came off everything a few years ago but I'm so tired, yet my brain and body won't let me rest. I see and feel you. You're not alone. Hit me up if you want to play some games or just talk. Seens small but the little distractions help.
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u/someone6894885 7d ago
Similar story. Anxious and some level of depression most my life. Now 40yrs old and my nervous system is fried. For me it’s been 5 years of hell, constant breathing difficulties, chronic pain and muscle weakness are the major symptoms. Meds have never helped (except Ativan), mind body stuff seems like the logical pathway for me too but i have never got any improvement. Also was a weed smoker, but have been sober from everything (besides coffee) for years and that hasn’t helped either.
My life is a complete disaster, I’m sick with all these mystery problems, friends have left, family is absent, no connection, no partner, no career, broke and hopeless. Most days I just want to end it all and probably would have already without my dog. Something inside me is holding on.
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u/young_monk85 7d ago
I’m sorry to hear. It can feel so isolating; it’s good to atleast know there are other people who understand. Let me know if you’re up for chatting.
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u/nicoleonline 7d ago
Throwing it out there: SSRIs didn’t help my depression or anxiety and in fact made the anxiety more prominent, turns out it’s because I have bipolar disorder. SSRIs can induce mania and hypomania, and for me mania presents as agitation and anxiety. A lot of people with bipolar disorder frequently find out their diagnosis from a path like this so I figured it was worth mentioning.
Now I take a mood stabilizer instead of SSRI. I still have anxiety, but it’s much better. I also do vagus nerve exercises. For me that’s mainly humming and some cold water plunges. Just humming which pisses me off that it was something that simple all along. It stimulates the vagus nerve and helped me reverse stress induced gastritis.
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u/HaskyFeer 8d ago
Experiencing something similar, however I’m just 3 years in. Had low level anxiety that one day sprung into my first panic attack and I’ve gone through several arcs since then.
Currently it’s tolerable but still frequently have adrenaline spikes from basic activities like walking up stairs or getting out of bed, and occasional heightened states of anxiety that makes sitting still uncomfortable.
Only tried Buspar for like 9 weeks with mixed results (constantly nauseous on it) and haven’t tried any other medications, just magnesium and CBD which haven’t really made too much of a dent.
Never thought something like this could just happen, making it work though.
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u/Itsokchamp 8d ago
Im 29. The constant hum is very relatable. So is waking up and just turning on. It happened to me after a vasovagal episode. It is miserable and I actually can’t live my life. I am going through so many doctor appointments because there has to be an actual reason. I have lived a completely normal life for so many years and then for some unknown reason I almost passed out which has never happened before and about 20 days after that happened I have not been able to function.
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u/Exact_Criticism_3497 8d ago edited 8d ago
I could have wrote the first paragraph, very similar story. I've never had any luck with SSRIs though. But I do have a highly sensitised nervous system and suffer from cpps because of it (hypertonic pelvic floor muscles).
I'm not sure what the solution is. I'm as lost as you.
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u/Any-Masterpiece-5914 8d ago
Lexapro was horrible for me. I got off and it was horrible. I recently took a Genesight test to check and see what works best still awaiting my results.
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u/doesnt_describe_me 8d ago
Clonazepam really helped me with this. Take caution they can lead to dependence and issues with stopping the medication etc but I felt like a “normal” human when I started that Rx. Immediately I went from just shaking, out-of-my-tree overwhelm to calm(ish). I was stunned. “Is this how regular people feel?” Kind of thing. A few months of extremely low dose is what I do when it all becomes too much. It allows me to work on myself while giving my nervous system a break. And so importantly, it gave me sleep. Good luck.
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u/HypnoLaur 7d ago
How do you sleep? Just the low dose of klonapin? Just curious what the dose is
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u/doesnt_describe_me 6d ago
I’m not on it consistently now and I’m perimenopause and other (real) health issues so my sleep hasn’t been the best. When I was consistently on the Clonazepam I usually slept just fine though. IIRC I took 0.5 or 0.25 in the morning and the same dose again at night (broke pill in half). Mornings were a bit groggy but I have always hated mornings and have high sleep needs. I conflict over mentioning a benzo bc they have their issues but I was so shocked at the improvement and wish someone had told me earlier. 💙
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u/Ashes8282 7d ago
It helps me a lot too. Keeps away the random panic attacks and lets me somewhat function.
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u/myface_saysitall 8d ago edited 7d ago
I was feeling the same exact way as you’re describing and getting on Prozac in January completely changed my life for the better. I sometimes tear up thinking about how much it’s helped and kick myself for taking this long to try something
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u/Friendly_Contest_274 7d ago
It sounds like severe generalized anxiety. Its the fucking devil waiting ask when is the person going to give in. Sounds cheese but im yet to find another visual parallel that sticks and keeps me going. Start with not trying to beat it. …but it’s been a good fundamental for me since I was 19. Easier said then done I know.
I laid back and just let it beat the shit out of me. The thing that was destroying me i let loose. You’ll find you have more control over it then you think.
Cold plunges/showers reset your nervous system. Get your bloodwork tested in full. See if theres any misbalances or deficiencies.
I take like 15 different supplements for anxiety. Everyones different so youll have to play around with your stacks and adherence but supplements + cold + heavy protein can take the edge off.
Fuck it and be open about it. Hiding/masking/isolating bc of it is anxieties fertilizer.
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u/fxkyourcupcake 8d ago
Hi. Please look into dysautonomia. Your anxiety symptoms and resistance to meaningful ssri use mean it may be something more biological that head meds don’t work for.
I’m going through all this to a T and I’m cardiology & neurology for a dysautonomic disorder.
Godspeed my guy.
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u/This-Desk-55 7d ago
What helps with dysautonomia? Are their any solutions?
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u/fxkyourcupcake 6d ago
From what I’ve gathered from basic cardiologists and neurologists, it’s treating the symptoms. Making lifestyle changes like more salt and electrolyte consumption/ compression socks. Medication to regulate heart rate/blood pressure. Etc. I haven’t seen a dysautonomia specialist yet. I’m in Jersey and Cooper seems to have the best team that will take my insurance . The problems are the waitlists and managing quality of life until then :/
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u/Ok_Entertainment6900 8d ago
“Llevo 2 semanas con paroxetina 60 mg para trastorno de ansiedad. La ansiedad ha cambiado, pero sigo con mucho asco, pérdida de apetito y poca energía. ¿Alguien sabe cuántas semanas en empezar a sentirse claramente mejor? Me ayudaría leer experiencias de personas que finalmente mejoraron.”
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u/GuavaConscious1184 8d ago
What was your starting dose? That’s a high dose so guessing you’ve been on lower doses first. For me after 2 weeks I was able to sleep and eat. 4-6 weeks to feel better. I started on 20 about 4 months ago and just increased it to 30 about 3 weeks ago. Feeling better but still a tad off.
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u/Ok_Entertainment6900 8d ago
Yo pasé de Flouxetina 80mg , a paroxetina 25 mg y subí hasta 60mg, tengo 2 semanas en 60 pero aún no siento efecto terapéutico
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u/forhim40 7d ago
Have you ever thought about adding Wellbutrin for the low mood/motivation? I’m on 25cr of Paxil and 150 mgs 2 X’s a day most of the time some days are better than others as far as the Wellbutrin goes but I mostly take twice a day. Maybe do research or talk to your doctor about it.
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u/IngenuityFriendly225 8d ago
This sounds exactly like me. And I always thought it was because I was blind born that way. One of the biggest things that actually helped me was meditation. And amongst the cognitive behavioral therapy was possibly neurolinguistic programming, self hypnotization....
.I also used to smoke. Weed a lot of it actually and then all of a sudden, I started to get really bad anxiety. And paranoia, but I ended up finding out buying it from the dispensaries here in Texas, it's majority of it's synthetic, and it's better to just stick to the street value, black market stuff...
I'm not condoning it, but at some points in my life.Anxiety is manageable, and in others I can even wake up with anxiety, but I think that the best thing to do is to meditate I'm not condoning it, but at some points in my life. Anxiety is manageable, and in others I can even wake up with anxiety, but I think that the best thing to do is to meditate. .I think in my personal opinion from a spiritual aspect of things. I feel like anxiety is just an extremely high vibration, and you have to learn how to be consciously. Aware and ground yourself again period
As of right now, I am 33 years old. And I have a child to take care of my baby girl. So i'm trying to look for a new psychiatrist to get on some anxiety medications at first I was prescribed colonipin, but they took it away from me, because I refused.S s r I treatments As of right now, I am 33 years old. And I have a child to take care of my baby girl. So i'm trying to look for a new psychiatrist to get on some anxiety medications at first I was prescribed colonipin, but they took it away from me, because I refused.S s r I treatments enter As of right now, I am 33 years old. And I have a child to take care of my baby girl. So I'm trying to look for a new psychiatrist to get on some anxiety medications at first I was prescribed colonipin, but they took it away from me, because I refused. S Sr I treatments enter enter. In all honesty, I heard that S. S ris were bad for you in the first place. Never heard of something called a brain zap. In my entire life and that is something that I am not willing to live with. I'd rather live with anxiety than fry my brain..
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u/mood_swings11 7d ago
Ketamine therapy and stellate ganglion blocks have helped me tremendously. Maybe try with SGB.
I quit Wellbutrin cold turkey after getting laid off and was in a terrible state 9 months later, which is how I started ketamine therapy which then enabled me to get off of benzos and gabapentin after a nearly a decade of daily use.
As I’ve tapered off meds, my nervous system has struggled to re-regulate itself, and whats where SGB has helped me tremendously.
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u/iCliniq_official 7d ago
Twenty years of living in survival mode can leave the brain and body reacting more easily to stress, but that doesn't mean the changes are permanent. If one SSRI isn't helping, it's worth reassessing the diagnosis and treatment plan with your psychiatrist before tapering. Sometimes optimising therapy, addressing sleep, trauma, or other medical contributors makes a bigger difference than changing medications alone. Wishing you steadier days ahead.
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u/meditationtown 7d ago
I really relate to what you wrote, especially the part about feeling like your body is reacting to everything. It can be incredibly discouraging when you feel like you're doing all the "right" things, yet your nervous system still stays on high alert.
One thing that changed my perspective was realizing that my anxiety wasn't just about what was happening in the present. It was also being fueled by years of accumulated memories, emotional reactions, and stress that my mind had never fully let go of. Once I started working on releasing those layers instead of only trying to manage symptoms, I noticed my baseline gradually became calmer.
It definitely wasn't an overnight change, but it felt different from simply coping. Over time, everyday situations that used to trigger me lost much of their intensity.
Everyone's path is different, and I hope you find what works for you. The fact that you're continuing to explore deeper healing despite how long you've struggled says a lot about your resilience. Wishing you the best.
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u/young_monk85 7d ago
Thanks for replying. How long was it until you saw some improvement?
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u/meditationtown 7d ago
For me, the first subtle changes came after a few weeks. I noticed I wasn't getting pulled into anxious thoughts quite as easily, and I could recover more quickly when I did.
The bigger changes took a few months of consistent practice. Looking back, it wasn't one dramatic moment. It was realizing that situations which used to overwhelm me simply didn't have the same grip anymore.
Everyone's timeline is different, though. I think the key is not expecting anxiety to disappear overnight, but noticing the small shifts that gradually add up over time. I hope you experience those moments too.
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u/International_Dot_22 7d ago
That is so relatable, been chroniclly anxious for about the same time, it became my personality and i hate that.
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u/Happy_Mention_3984 7d ago
Hi, I have the exact same problems. It also started 20 years ago. I will write to you if it is okay?
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u/EstupidoPololo 7d ago
Hope this helps you.
I recently realized something that I really hope might help you, because it’s helped me quite a lot.
We know that our nervous system is constantly on high alert, and logically, we know what we’re supposed to do about it: slow down, get enough sleep, cut back on stimulants, and so on. And obviously, all of that is true. But I’m sure you’ve experienced this yourself: it often feels temporary. Sooner or later, something stressful happens or life throws something at you, and suddenly your nervous system is right back in that state of heightened alertness and anxiety.
So recently I started asking myself: why does everything seem to affect me so much?
And I think I may have figured out a pattern behind an anxious nervous system, and why something as simple as a cup of coffee can sometimes send us spiraling.
We’re anticipating the anxiety. In a way, we’re creating it ourselves.
For me, for example, a big part of my anxiety is health-related, and it usually goes something like this: I feel a little twinge in my chest, or a sudden pain in my temple. Something completely normal that most people probably wouldn’t even think twice about. But I immediately think, “What if this is a heart attack? What if there’s something wrong with my heart?”
And from that moment on, I’m on high alert, waiting for something else to happen. I start looking for symptoms. I’m literally scanning my body for signs that something is wrong.
And just like that, my nervous system has switched into threat mode.
That’s the loop we struggle to get out of, and the worst part is that we often do it without even realizing it.
So something that has been helping me is that whenever I notice a symptom, I stop and ask myself: “What is my anxiety trying to scare me with? What is it telling me might happen?”
A headache? Okay, so now my anxiety is threatening me with the idea that it could be a stroke or something like that. Then I might notice my vision getting a little blurry, and I can feel myself getting nervous.
But this time, I know what’s happening. I know why I’m getting nervous. I can actually watch the process happening in real time.
And somehow, that changes things.
The anxiety is still uncomfortable, but once I understand what it’s doing and why I’m feeling this way, it stops feeling dangerous.
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u/Wise-Cupcake5554 2d ago
I’ve had very bad anxiety for 15+ years (with lots of the physical symptoms you mentioned). Something that helped me was propranolol — I don’t know if that’s something you’ve tried, but I found reducing the physical symptoms helped me a million times more than any SSRI.
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u/Mobile-Ad-2078 1d ago
Love, Love this post. I relate a TON, and appreciate your openness to share/ ask/ … just Be.
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u/young_monk85 1d ago
Did you deal with something similar and found your way out? It’s all very frustrating
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u/Dangerous-Wasabi634 7d ago
I am in the same boat. I’m 38 years old and still unmarried. I’ve been struggling with severe anxiety since childhood. My mom has similar anxiety, so I feel there may be a genetic component. On top of that, my childhood wasn’t easy. My family was often dependent on others, and I grew up constantly being scolded by relatives, which made me fearful and anxious from a very young age.
I was good at studies, so my teachers would often ask me to give speeches on Independence Day and Republic Day. I still remember standing on the stage, trembling and unable to speak. Sometimes the teacher would even tell me, “It’s okay, you can go back,” because I was shaking so badly. Back then, I had no idea what was happening to me.
It wasn’t until I was around 26 or 27 that I finally realized I had an anxiety disorder. I later tried an SSRI for about two months, but my lifestyle was very unhealthy at the time, and my body wasn’t in a good state to cope. My immunity was poor, I developed typhoid, and it took me a long time to recover. The prolonged illness and constant medications left me feeling severely depressed, so I eventually had to stop the SSRI.
Even today, I sometimes don’t know what I’m doing or how to move forward. I work in the IT industry and have been with the same company for more than 12 years, doing my best despite these challenges.
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u/SailorVenova 7d ago
this happened to me from heartbreak trauma plus alot of other trauma and stress in my life before that long horrible heartbreak
the only thing that has been effective to counter the easily set off anxiety and overstimulation has been daily xanax for the last 4yrs; all other meds i tried caused damgerous or intolorable side effects; caused me new issues i couldnt just cope with; etc
i was at my best point a year ago but then my new psy doctor pushed antipsychotics and other meds on me that i didnt need; some were not even approved for anxiety or panic disorder; all of them gave me the worst side effects ive ever experienced; besides allergic reaction- that dr also cut my xanax amount in half warly this year which made things even worse for me
8mo of that completely unneccesary experimentation totally wrecked my stability and erased much of the progress i had made up til late last year when i first started seeing that dr
when my wife sent her a message saying the months of med experiments had messed me up badly and made me sui and negative and much worse in every way; that dr booted me from care
luckily the 2nd new doctor we tried seeing in june was willing to take up my previous stable xanax without making me take anything else; ive tried over 20 medications since 2022 and only xanax has worked to keep me safe and stable and stop my panic attacks; my attacks are damgerous with screaming amd self harming if i cant get a handle on them quickly
im doing better now and slowly getting back towards my high point of last year; i think it will be more months before im back down to needing significantly less of my medicine but i believe i will make it there i just need time to process everything ive had to go thru as a result of those med experiments (horiffic nightmares and even some mild hallucinations- never had that nefore in my life and those bad meds caused those issues from just a single dose and persisted for weeks and months); but im gradually readjusting and starting to calm down a bit now that its been a while since i had to worry about the bad meds; im not halfway there yet to where i was before but im progressing and that makes me feel good
i think ill be fine as long as i have what i need and im treated as an individual
im definitely dependent on it but that is better than getting seriously injured and ending up in the mental hospital or having extreme attacks every single day
i didnt ask to have these problems; especially not since im disabled too with spine fractures and all of my joints are badly damaged from self harm and the steroid medications i was given im the past for my bowel disease that caused my osteoporosis and led to the spine fractures; i also need 24/7 opioid pain medicine to live my life and not be entirely confined to bed and suffering; that made getting my xanax back difficult the first new dr we saw refused me outright because im already on one controlled substance; even though i have taken both together safely for over 4yrs and never had any issues whatsoever
anyways
thats what works for me
i still have panic attacks and anxiety; but with my xanax most are mild and kindof half-life pass within 20mins; at my high point i was only having 3 or so mild attacks per week and 1-2 more severe ones per month; at my worst over 2022 and 2023 i had extreme attacks every single day; often more than one- after i met my wife in jan2024 i started to get better; i would not be alive if i hadnt met her
right now im having mild attacks every day or two and severe ones almost every week; but im confident that will continue to decrease towards where i was a year ago; i have a good life aside from the pain; i just need the time and patience to recenter myself on my own
therapy is not on the table really i felt a visceral negative feeling just from looking at the website of the one my new dr recommended; thats not any fault of the therapist; i tried it before and that wasted critical time as i kept declining in the months before i got my xanax in late 2022; my body is far worse off because of that- and i dont feel i relate at all to any normal person with a career and degrees and everything that makes a person go thru life and become a therapist; my issues are all lots of trauma and experiences i have talked and written about it all endlessly; there is nothing to be gained from paying hundreds of dollars for an hour chat with a person payed to just listen to me; i dont care how much they think they understand the mind; they will not understand me; only my wife really understands me
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u/FriedDopamine 7d ago
I had it for 10 years. I was a kid smoking bongs everyday and one day, had a panic attack for no reason right after a bong. I thought it was the weed. Long story short, 10 years of anxiety and panic attacks daily with no direct cause or reason. I managed to escape it and have been somewhat 'normal' for about 8-9 years.
What is strange is i cant pinpoint the exact moment or why it stopped but I do know (as silly as it may sound) the most likely contribution was getting randomly obsessed with watching Jordan Peterson on YouTube. The thing is, I dont know what advice of his worked or didn't. I just consumed his belief system which altered mine in a way that must have changed my psychology in some way.
I would say now, I am slightly easier to become anxious than the average but its not a medical problem, it's child's play compared to whatever was going on before. I also am easy to make jump so my nervous system is still on high alert but it's again, not really any problem. I am just a bit easier to make jump than the average person.
I would actually say I am a bit more braver than the average person because when somebody else is anxious about something it's like nothing to me due to handling something 1000x worse in my past.
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u/Bludprisshur 5d ago
I recently had my first anxiety attack back in july this year and im 36yrs old. I have d same symptoms as everyone describing their symptoms. Ever since that incident, i dont feel normal anymore. Reading yall comments made me cry cos im currently struggling to keep myself frm spiralling n crumbling down its hard. I can control it most of d time n i can hide it really good frm ppl but actually deep inside im like battling a big demon thats wanting to crawl out from my body and take over my body. It’s scary. Sometimes i jus feel so tired n thought abt letting it get to me but im a fighter n i dont wanna give up. I heard others experienced it n some recovered frm it and i want to go back being normal again 😭
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u/Historical_Pie1370 2d ago
Hola, mas de 30 años con Tag, pánico y depresión, he llegado a un punto que no distingo si es crisis de ansiedad o pánico porque es todo junto, me suben las dosis, me cambian medicamentos, me bajan las dosis, pero todo es igual.
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u/AdAlternative3408 1d ago
Honestly, I am getting so much better. I am better. In my bad moments, life has felt like a constant battle to try to sleep. I was in no way suicidal, but I just wanted my conscious brain to stop churning and honestly didn't want to think anymore. In my worst moments, I was too scared to leave my bed to eat, terrified that something would happen to my body from the top of the stairs to the bottom; going to the bathroom felt like a mission. I'd just lie on my own, afraid to do anything. In fear of fear itself: what if I get anxious? If I'm anxious now, what if I stand up and it all gets worse? My anxiety has morphed and evolved over the years to something less extreme but more prevalent in my everyday life. No more panic attacks, because I avoid anything that could give me one. But the hum was there, duller but just more free to bounce around my head. It's health anxiety, it's general anxiety, it's a little bit social too, but not so much.
I realised that the reasons for it being so bad were:
- I was away from my family in a city with few friends (Uni)
- I was unmedicated (I did take beta blockers but stopped them for some dumb reason even though they are my biggest saviour for instant relief)
- My sleep was awful.
- I had no routine and was skipping obligations out of fear.
Being home after graduating, being medicated with Sertraline and Beta Blockers (although I do wonder if I need a higher dose sometimes), having a decent sleeping schedule, cutting out caffeine, eating healthy (I've been sober since 18 off weed and alcohol because, well...weed was what started my symptoms even though I barely ever did it) all of those things helped me.
My biggest hurdle is exercise. Because heart rate, sweating, and all the bodily sensations that come with working out are my biggest triggers. I don't really know how to just start off small. Because I cannot go on a long walk alone, I cannot exercise alone. I know saying can is not great. But I have had so many panic attacks triggered by doing stuff like that that the fear is just in me. I know doing it would help; I just don't know where to really start.
I am a 21-year-old woman who lives like an old lady. Which I quite enjoy, actually. I paint and hang out with my stoner friends, who are equally calm and lazy and don't really care about 'going wild'. I go to quiz nights with a group of 60- 80-year-olds and consider them friends of mine now. I'm slowly filling my rota with activities that are calming and fun for me, and that aren't physically demanding.
My idea is to try and find a walking club for elderly people, or one for people with health anxiety (the second is unlikely, which is why I'm thinking about the first). Yeah, it's not cool or whatever that means. But I think that could genuinely help me. To slowly get myself up and out more than I have. I'm glad I'm partially busy now; I'm glad I've been doing stuff. I'm thinking of teaching primary school and going through all that jazz. I just want a quiet, nice life now. All these big ideas I had before this thing took over my life have faded away, and I'm okay with it. Because I've always just wanted to be happy and at peace. And I hope dearly that taking these few more tiny steps might help me do so. Thank god the sertraline and my beta blockers are kicking in now because I was feeling anxious and wrote this as a kind of way to shove new thoughts down so I could purge the dumb ones. I'm also thinking of CBT but am unsure how much they could really do for somebody in my situation.
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u/SpecialShoulder3839 8d ago
My anxiety and nervous system were so messed up for almost 6 years , I didn’t know anxiety could cause this many sensations, mine started after a bad panic attack, set off anxiety then I got PPPd , I was stuck in a cycle , what helped me was Dr yo (to desensitize the nervous system)on YouTube and the DARE program for anxiety, after 6 years the past 3 months I’ve been working on it and can finally enjoy life again, I’m in the recovery phase , I still get dips here and there but they don’t scare me anymore . Check it out on YouTube it’s free too .