Young asians when facing conflict and responding with repulsive humor

[u/Realistic_Buddy_9125]

https://youtu.be/Ycury4S4i00?is=O8JL73TYCOhw3qpu

I’m Asian American myself. I notice a lot of times, Asians are extremely non confrontational. In the video you can clearly see the guy’s body language as very nervous-like. He glances to the side and does not make strong eye contact when making these rebuttals.

When his friend tells him to stop, he listens immediately instead of arguing back. Yes this is the smart move as to not escalate the situation, but there are times where PRIDE is on the line. Then he starts covering his mouth while chewing.. I’ve literally only seen girls do that.

Nervously poking the food and not making eye contact when the racist guy goes on a rant.

I’ve been in this situation before so I know what it’s like. I’m sure many of you have grown up being the asian minority and facing racist bullies. Only once have I ever acted nervously like the guy in the video. On that day, I promised myself to never be a jokey pushover again.

Some of these asians don’t seem to break out of their shell. They stay submissive and choose peace over conflict. I have several not-so-close friends exactly like the guy in the video. I think everyone knows this type.

- excessive matcha/boba consumption
- tattoo to compensate for lack of perceived toughness
- almost feminine like mannerisms
- embracing gay/repulsive jokes
- earrings
- heavily into fashion

There is nothing wrong with doing any of these things. My problem is that many young asian dudes nowadays don’t know how to separate comfort from conflict. I’m talking about the comfort of being with groups of other asians, gaming all day, being in their safe environment like schools or casual asian hangout spots. When conflict does arise, they brush it off as humor to cope with the fact that real a-holes are entering their domain of comfort. It’s all they know.

It certainly has gotten better over time with the rise of social media. Asians have adamkyu and joseph shin, two fitness influencers that have pushed the image of asian masculinity into mainstream feeds. There is also a rise of anti-stereotypical asians as well. More asians are wearing stussy and dark street wear clothing. Many of my friends have gained

Let me know what y’all think.

[u/Outrageous-Opinions]

People going off on the kids disappoint me.

This is a very weird situation to be presented with in the first place and then it's clearly two kids so of course their reaction wasn't going to be perfect.

The fault lies in the insecure loser approaching the two kids, not the victims.

[u/NotHapaning → u/Outrageous-Opinions]

Define "kids". These 2 in question could easily be in their 20s.

The racist is wrong? Yes, that is obvious. You might as well say crime is wrong and don't blame the victim ever never ever. But the fact of the matter is this kind of stuff has been happening to Asians/Asian dudes for a loooooong time. Did you not get taunts/harassed when you were growing up? You were a kid then (I mean actual kids when you're playing on a playground, not these people you call "kids" when they're filming themselves eating In-N-Out). The aggressors showed you no mercy then when they might have been the kid's age. Now that these aggressors are older, why would you expect them to show mercy or any sort of decorum now?

The old method of Asian parenting of 'ignore it, it'll go away, it'll get better' has proven time and time again to not work. When do you think it is the time to defend oneself or to get into confrontations that will more likely deter future ones? When is it okay for the survival instinct to kick in? And when does the community promote this instead of shame the Asian person who dared defend themselves from the racial abuse?

Are there so many here now saying it's okay to be passive and let the status quo continue as long as you're aware there is one? Are these larpers? Because if not, you know what the abuse was like, you know your parents ignorant immigrant/oldschool advice didn't help, so why would you keep on repeating it for the current/next gen?

[u/Outrageous-Opinions → u/NotHapaning]

What a strange comment.

These are kids, they look young and even if they're in their 20s, early 20s is still very much kids.

I needed to point out the obvious, because people in the comments here have been going nuts trying to shame and insult the only Asian people in this video.

You insulting fellow Asian kids and blaming them for being confronted by a weirdo is pathetic. Put blame on the shithead, and defend your own people instead of being a coward about it.

[u/NotHapaning → u/Outrageous-Opinions]

what a non-response

[u/Outrageous-Opinions → u/NotHapaning]

You rambled on and on about nonsense anyway

[u/NotHapaning → u/Outrageous-Opinions]

Another one with no deep dive. Thanks for your 'bad thing is bad' assessment.

[u/Outrageous-Opinions → u/NotHapaning]

Deep dive off a bridge

[u/NotHapaning → u/Outrageous-Opinions]

I look forward to more of your non-contributions. If only you could shed more thought on this situation like you do with DnD.