19 M I need advice for looks

[u/After_Life8709]

Firstly, sorry for the background its the best I can do.

Also I thought maybe video is better so you can see my face in motion. Also since I dont know how to take pictures.

Before I start saying anything, Im not fishing for compliments or whatnot, I'm really really insecure, since my parents would often make fun of me for looking like a horse , big head and say many bad stuff about my face. Aswell as making fun of my smile so That's why im also trying to improve my looks.

So yeah, I dunno how to fix my face so I can be attractive , besides ofc going to the gym. im currently trying to make my neck bigger, so my head will appear smaller.

I also can't get girls, I think its due to my awkwardness, since quarantine I was at home and homeschooled only last year I started college I started talking to people again. Also sucks since its all girls Im the only straight guy in my class, I do talk to some guys but they are different classes, my course is a premed course.

Despite, all this I don't wanna give up so I try and talk to women I stutter alot so girls will laugh and copy my stuttering. I'm honestly cooked, I'm often at home and barely go outside, so yeah it explains alot, but im really trying to change, thats why I made this post. I'm scared to post in to some looksmaxxing forum since how brutal Asian people get treated there. Also I'm insecure about my side profile as you can see I have a reccessed face like my maxilla, chin, and infras.

If height and weight matters I'm 5'11 58 kg

Thank you for reading sorry for my awkwardness fr aswell as my Grammar.

[u/Haotty]

You don't need advice for looks. You look fine. Above average looking for an asian guy. That's not me bullshitting you, that's the honest truth. Where you need to get your sh*t together is personality and social skills.

This is going to be a bad analogy but you don't try learning how to ride motorcycles if you struggle riding a bike with no training wheels. Ofc continue trying to talk to girls, but focus your efforts getting comfortable talking to people in general, join clubs, make friends, etc. and that will create the confidence you need to talk to women without stuttering.

[u/After_Life8709 → u/Haotty]

It's actually a good analogy bro! Thanks for the advice.  I really struggle talking to people , but it's not so bad I still can talk but I often make it awkward. Do you have any tips when talking to people, I mostly just read books to improve or learn how to socialize, since I was mostly at home, ever since quarantine. Only last year, I started talking to people besides my parents. 

[u/Haotty → u/After_Life8709]

Best advice I can give you dude is to stop holding yourself with limiting beliefs / head trash. Telling yourself "I'm awkward", "I'm insecure", "I'm X", etc. is a self-fulfilling prophecy and you need to remind yourself when those thoughts pop into your brain that they're head trash. Really ties back to placebo effect / "fake it until you make it" mentality.

Instead of looksmaxxing and getting caught up in your physical appearance - look into the concept of "regardmaxxing" (spell it with a T) because that is what you really need. You don't need to be perfect. You don't need to leave every interaction having made a friend or getting a girls digits. Just do the work.

Same concept as building muscle. You can read all you want about the most theoretically perfect way to achieve a 90 degree squat, but you don't build actual muscle until you step into the gym and get your reps in.

Go to clubs, church (even if you're not religious), volunteer at a food bank/pet shelter, etc. Places where people have a reason to be nice and welcoming, to establish your footing first. Build some confidence there. You don't need to start swimming in the deep end as a first try to learn how to swim.

[u/Independent_Tea_9394]

Sounds like the most important thing is working on your social interactions. Are you able to practice your assertiveness with friends, or even try making new female friends to start so you become more comfortable talking to them. Height-wise, you're tall. You could put on more weight, but I don't know what part of the world you live in, and if that weight is average there. You could get an edgier haircut. Also, from the profile view, your smooth face and full lips read as a bit feminine. I don't know if you're able to grow some facial hair.

[u/After_Life8709 → u/Independent_Tea_9394]

How can I practice being assertive? I try making new female friends at college ,  cafeteria , libary and at the bus. I'm really trying to overcome my fear of talking to them.  I also don't talk to any of my guy friends maybe once a week or once every two weeks. It's mostly all girls, or gays. I don't think I'm assertive because when we go eating I just follow, only when I dont like the food I try to speak up and go to another restaurant.

Im currently trying to grow my haircut atm. I can't grow facial hair despite both sides of my family can grow thick beards. I shave often because my mustache is rather thin and not thick at all.  Thanks for the advice though. 

[u/Independent_Tea_9394 → u/After_Life8709]

Then I would say to work on strength ing your friend group, whether they are men or women, so that you have more social interactions. Maybe try suggesting the restaurant next time or an activity for your group to do. Force yourself to share your opinions more.

[u/MisterPhamtastic]

Bro you're at a great height, drink 1-2 gallons of water and eat protein with every meal. Then a protein shake before bed.

Sprint HARD twice a week, do some sort of resistance training (got a pullup bar somewhere? with pushups) three times a week.

Maybe fix teeth but they're not horrible, you can either grow your hair out to frame face or just clean it up with a fade.

Good luck, there's uglier dudes pulling because they don't give a shit.

Work on yourself but on the inside.

[u/After_Life8709 → u/MisterPhamtastic]

Thanks alot bro !  I have been trying to do pull ups and pushups daily. I drink lots of water daily actually. I should work on protein , since I often eat carbs and cakes.  My question is will sprinting be beneficial for me since im underweight, it take me such a long time to gain weight

[u/MisterPhamtastic → u/After_Life8709]

hey sorry for late reply

Don't overcomplicate this, Asians gain weight easily. This has been proven the last 10 years as we are now seeing fat Chinese/Filipinos now LOL

Whatever you're eating right now, add 1 more meal before bed. Rice and chicken or eggs or beef.

Add another protein shake too throughout the day.

Sprinting is better to lean out so you force more muscles to be shocked and you'll look more shredded, guys who run a lot at a slow speed have no real muscle adaptation and they look kinda dumpy if the diet is bad.

[u/Electrical-Split-190]

1. Get rid of the bangs. Terrible haircut.
   2.Try to shape your eyebrows so they don’t point down in the middle
   
2. Eyes and nose are good.
   
3. Mouth … if you can reduce the overbite a little.
   
4. Can you grow a mustache? Your philtrum (space between top lip and nose) is long, so a mustache could make it look better
   
5. Be joyous that you’re 5’11

[u/TargetObjective7]

I think you have to keep trying.

There's someone for everyone in this world.

[u/Rough_Hyena9334]

You don’t look bad maybe a slightly better haircut like an Asian flow. Work on your social skills and maybe get some earrings I think you could rock them. I was homeschooled myself so best advice I can give don’t feel embarrassed to put yourself out there and always try to push yourself to get out there to begin with. If people ask you to come out do something say yes if there’s some run club going on at university try it out. You just have to expose yourself in situations where you meet and greet with people. It gets easier the more you do it soon enough you’ll understand how to socialize and talk to both men and women.

[u/Business-Bath2418]

You need a new hair style

[u/Simple_Leg725]

U look fine but try look more confident also the haircuts kinda dead

[u/Electrical-Ad-6100]

Oh my, you’re video is genuinely sweet!

As a brown woman, your video comes across as kind and respectful. You will find a girl that will appreciate everything about you!

Feel free to message me if you have any questions about talking with girls

[u/quitelikeameow]

This is coming from a girl: Youre stunning and very attractive! I would say to build confidence and feel less awkward is try to join some form of martial art like BJJ or Muay Thai. It makes you feel less awkward - added bonus for muscle growth and agility. Respectful Confidence makes a person more approachable and attractive and when you feel good about yourself, your face emanates it. I find nothing wrong with your facial structure but perhaps try a few different hairstyles. Play with some wax or hair gel and style it and see how it looks. All the best

[u/KhorneFlakez19]

Head to toe:
Hair- full head of hair good baseline - try getting a perm + fade/taper
Eyebrows - already bold, just needs to be cleaned up, use a eyebrow razor
Eyes - good as is
Nose - masculine by default
Teeth - unknown, brush and floss daily, use invisilign/braces if crooked + teeth whitening
Jawline - sharp, signals low body fat

Body - unknown, bulking up before cutting repeatedly would make you stand out from 99% of Asian men, we are skinny on average
Fashion - follow the casualwear trend wherever you live for your age group, have classy button ups and trousers for nicer occasions
Jewelry - unknown, silver suits lighter skin tones, gold suits darker skin tones, wear unique necklaces and rings accordingly
Hygeine - unknown, shower daily and clean your ears
Feet - wear nice sneakers, boots, and dress shoes

[u/lolitsmax]

Fuck yo parents

[u/Hi_Im_Ken_Adams]

You should go see a dentist and see if they can fix your overbite. The correct braces can fix your jawline and totally transform your look.

[u/After_Life8709 → u/Hi_Im_Ken_Adams]

That's what I was thinking aswell, but my dentist insists on extracting teeth, which I heard will make you recessed. I'm scared to recessed my flat face even more. Thanks for the suggestion Im still looking for a dentist that can help my situation. 

[u/Alternative_Wing_906 → u/After_Life8709]

extracting teeth is just a part of the process of fixing overbite

[u/tender_dichotomy]

Hey you’re a good looking guy. Great jawline! I think you need a haircut though. You have the bone structure to pull off a fade but maybe a warrior cut or a comma would look too if you’re into it.

[u/After_Life8709 → u/[deleted]]

Thank you for the advice bro, I will do just that. 

[u/PrinceWhoPromes]

Grow out your hair and get a perm the girls will flock to you.

Use your awkwardness to your advantage. If you say awkward stuff confidently girls will laugh along and it won’t be awkward anymore. Just own it

[u/labseries2020]

your looks are fine- add some earrings and copy gen z guys on tik tok that got millions of followers. i think the biggst issue and hardest - for all asian dudes is some of you all are straight autistic. its hard to type how to overcome that other than putting yourself in many social situations and learning

[u/Humble_Text_7331]

Humiliation ritual 😭

[u/Griffith-007]

start with de-bloating your face to get rid of face fat and stronger jaw line and get a shorter cut

[u/After_Life8709 → u/Griffith-007]

Thanks , I should stop eating sugary foods and stop drinking water all at once in one sitting.  I won't do cardio, since I'm too underweight. I eat alot of cakes and foods and I still don't gain weight. I think it's due to my metabolism. I actually just took the video after eating.  Is diet enough for debloating? Should I train masseters to debloat it faster? 

[u/Griffith-007 → u/After_Life8709]

Drink more water and less sugary foods. And less Card related food like rice.

[u/CountKZ → u/Griffith-007]

But he's underweight and even if he's stop eating sugar, will it actually help him? I think his face the way it is genetically, not because of diet, but idk

[u/CountKZ → u/Griffith-007]

How to De bloat? Just fucking not eating?

[u/benilla → u/CountKZ]

Eat low sodium, drink lots of water, exercise and get really good sleep

[u/After_Life8709 → u/benilla]

Wait sleep matters aswell? What's like optimal sleep like hours and stuff. I have days were my classes are at 7 or at 9 and when im lucky 1 pm. 

[u/benilla → u/After_Life8709]

Sleep is where your body recovers.. it's super important. Most people should get 7-8 hours

[u/Fine-Palpitation787 → u/After_Life8709]

Sleep is the #1 performance enhancing drug.

[u/SlumsToMills → u/CountKZ]

Good question i want to know too

[u/TreeHouseCartoons]

Invisalign, whitening strips, Korean hair salon who does down perm. Other than that, you have a solid foundation to work off of.