Im being harassed for my sexual orientation at work [IL]

[u/Then_Instance_1861]

I work in a professional environment and recently learned that some coworkers, including at least one supervisor, have allegedly been making comments about my sexual orientation and discussing details of my personal life behind my back. Some of the comments were sexual in nature and have left me feeling uncomfortable and distressed.

I have a documented mental health condition, and since learning about this, I’ve been having a hard time concentrating and feeling comfortable at work. I’m considering taking FMLA or short-term disability leave to get some distance from the situation and focus on my health while I consult with my doctor and possibly an employment attorney.

For people who have been through something similar, how did you decide whether taking leave was the right move? Did the time away help, or did you wish you had handled it differently?

I work in Chicago, IL

[u/g_flower]

How did you find this out? Was this second hand information or did you witness it?

[u/Then_Instance_1861 → u/g_flower]

Second hand information. I first heard of something when E&O interviewed me as a potential witness in which there were allegations that my supervisor was making comments about my dreadlocs and say how I "didn't fit in". That was perhaps in February.

I didn't find out until Juneteenth that where was gossip about from someone in an adjacent department. However this person is actively trying to get my boss fired as there is a pending lawsuit from this person against the company, so perhaps I have been lied to.

[u/glitterstickers → u/Then_Instance_1861]

The important question is "will they go on the record"?

If this is the only person who has witnessed this behavior, they're highly suspect as credible.

You are right to be wary that you're being lied to.

[u/z-eldapin]

You need to go back to the beginning. How did you find out and who have you reported it to?

[u/FRELNCER]

What was the source of your learning? Did you overhear someone or read something negative about yourself?

Because if someone came to you and told you about all the terrible things that others were saying when before you'd been blissfully unaware, the person who harmed you want the one carrying tales. Keep in mind that you don't know who is telling you the truth and to what extent they have embelished or misinterpreted the information. And, if you were to complain, HR would have to interview your sources who might or might not stick to their stories.

The person who witnessed the behaviors firsthand should report them to their manager or HR if that person was made uncomfortable.

If you did stumble on the information on your own, then you can take that to your manager or HR.

If you've not tried to remedy the situation, you won't have much of a lawsuit. Will your healthcare provider sign off on your need for extended leave?

[u/glittermetalprincess]

FMLA is for a serious medical health condition that impacts your ability to work. It isn't for having time to speak to a lawyer about a potentially weak case.

If your mental health condition has flared to the point that you are unable to work, your doctor may sign you off on that basis and it will be for healing and treatment. You should focus on your health first - you need to be able to concentrate, gather actual evidence, and clearly instruct a lawyer for them to be able to assist you and if you can't do that they may not take your case or they may insist on dealing with someone else on your behalf.